novel notes-第34章
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seph; but everything else about him rendered such an assumption impossible。 Putting aside the time and the place; and forgetting his behaviour; his companions; and his instrument; what remained was sufficient to make the suggestion absurd。 Joseph was always clean shaven; this youth had a smudgy moustache and a pair of incipient red whiskers。 He was dressed in the loudest check suit I have ever seen; off the stage。 He wore patent…leather boots with mother…of…pearl buttons; and a necktie that in an earlier age would have called down lightning out of Heaven。 He had a low…crowned billycock hat on his head; and a big evil…smelling cigar between his lips。
〃Argue as I would; however; the face was the face of Joseph; and; moved by a curiosity I could not control; I kept near him; watching him。
〃Once; for a little while; I missed him; but there was not much fear of losing that suit for long; and after a little looking about I struck it again。 He was sitting at the end of the pier; where it was less crowded; with his arm round a girl's waist。 I crept close。 She was a jolly; red…faced girl; good…looking enough; but common to the last degree。 Her hat lay on the seat beside her; and her head was resting on his shoulder。 She appeared to be fond of him; but he was evidently bored。
〃'Don'tcher like me; Joe?' I heard her murmur。
〃'Yas;' he replied; somewhat unconvincingly; 'o' course I likes yer。'
〃She gave him an affectionate slap; but he did not respond; and a few minutes afterwards; muttering some excuse; he rose and left her; and I followed him as he made his way towards the refreshment…room。 At the door he met one of his pals。
〃'Hullo!' was the question; 'wot 'a yer done wi' 'Liza?'
〃'Oh; I carn't stand 'er;' was his reply; 'she gives me the bloomin' 'ump。 You 'ave a turn with 'er。'
〃His friend disappeared in the direction of 'Liza; and Joe pushed into the room; I keeping close behind him。 Now that he was alone I was determined to speak to him。 The longer I had studied his features the more resemblance I had found in them to those of my superior friend Joseph。
〃He was leaning across the bar; clamouring for two of gin; when I tapped him on the shoulder。 He turned his head; and the moment he saw me; his face went livid。
〃'Mr。 Joseph Smythe; I believe;' I said with a smile。
〃'Who's Mr。 Joseph Smythe?' he answered hoarsely; 'my name's Smith; I ain't no bloomin' Smythe。 Who are you? I don't know yer。'
〃As he spoke; my eyes rested upon a curious gold ring of Indian workmanship which he wore upon his left hand。 There was no mistaking the ring; at all events: it had been passed round the club on more than one occasion as a unique curiosity。 His eyes followed my gaze。 He burst into tears; and pushing me before him into a quiet corner of the saloon; sat down facing me。
〃'Don't give me away; old man;' he whimpered; 'for Gawd's sake; don't let on to any of the chaps 'ere that I'm a member of that blessed old waxwork show in Saint James's: they'd never speak to me agen。 And keep yer mug shut about Oxford; there's a good sort。 I wouldn't 'ave 'em know as 'ow I was one o' them college blokes for anythink。'
〃I sat aghast。 I had listened to hear him entreat me to keep 'Smith;' the rorty 'Arry; a secret from the acquaintances of 'Smythe;' the superior person。 Here was 'Smith' in mortal terror lest his pals should hear of his identity with the aristocratic 'Smythe;' and discard him。 His attitude puzzled me at the time; but; when I came to reflect; my wonder was at myself for having expected the opposite。
〃'I carn't 'elp it;' he went on; 'I 'ave to live two lives。 'Arf my time I'm a stuck…up prig; as orter be jolly well kicked'
〃'At which times;' I interrupted; 'I have heard you express some extremely uncomplimentary opinions concerning 'Arries。'
〃'I know;' he replied; in a voice betraying strong emotion; 'that's where it's so precious rough on me。 When I'm a toff I despises myself; 'cos I knows that underneath my sneering phiz I'm a bloomin' 'Arry。 When I'm an 'Arry; I 'ates myself 'cos I knows I'm a toff。'
〃'Can't you decide which character you prefer; and stick to it?' I asked。
〃'No;' he answered; 'I carn't。 It's a rum thing; but whichever I am; sure as fate; 'bout the end of a month I begin to get sick o' myself。'
〃'I can quite understand it;' I murmured; 'I should give way myself in a fortnight。'
〃'I've been myself; now;' he continued; without noticing my remark; 'for somethin' like ten days。 One mornin'; in 'bout three weeks' time; I shall get up in my diggins in the Mile End Road; and I shall look round the room; and at these clothes 'angin' over the bed; and at this yer concertina' (he gave it an affectionate squeeze); 'and I shall feel myself gettin' scarlet all over。 Then I shall jump out o' bed; and look at myself in the glass。 〃You howling little cad;〃 I shall say to myself; 〃I have half a mind to strangle you〃; and I shall shave myself; and put on a quiet blue serge suit and a bowler 'at; tell my landlady to keep my rooms for me till I comes back; slip out o' the 'ouse; and into the fust 'ansom I meets; and back to the Halbany。 And a month arter that; I shall come into my chambers at the Halbany; fling Voltaire and Parini into the fire; shy me 'at at the bust of good old 'Omer; slip on my blue suit agen; and back to the Mile End Road。'
〃'How do you explain your absence to both parties?' I asked。
〃'Oh; that's simple enough;' he replied。 'I just tells my 'ousekeeper at the Halbany as I'm goin' on the Continong; and my mates 'ere thinks I'm a traveller。'
〃'Nobody misses me much;' he added; pathetically; 'I hain't a partic'larly fetchin' sort o' bloke; either of me。 I'm sich an out… and…outer。 When I'm an 'Arry; I'm too much of an 'Arry; and when I'm a prig; I'm a reg'lar fust prize prig。 Seems to me as if I was two ends of a man without any middle。 If I could only mix myself up a bit more; I'd be all right。'
〃He sniffed once or twice; and then he laughed。 'Ah; well;' he said; casting aside his momentary gloom; 'it's all a game; and wot's the odds so long as yer 'appy。 'Ave a wet?'
〃I declined the wet; and left him playing sentimental airs to himself upon the concertina。
〃One afternoon; about a month later; the servant came to me with a card on which was engraved the name of 'Mr。 Joseph Smythe。' I requested her to show him up。 He entered with his usual air of languid superciliousness; and seated himself in a graceful attitude upon the sofa。
〃'Well;' I said; as soon as the girl had closed the door behind her; 'so you've got rid of Smith?'
〃A sickly smile passed over his face。 'You have not mentioned it to any one?' he asked anxiously。
〃'Not to a soul;' I replied; 'though I confess I often feel tempted to。'
〃'I sincerely trust you never will;' he said; in a tone of alarm。 'You can have no conception of the misery the whole thing causes me。 I cannot understand it。 What possible affinity there can be between myself and that disgusting little snob passes my comprehension。 I assure you; my dear Mac; the knowledge that I was a ghoul; or a vampire; would cause me less nausea than the reflection that I am one and the same with that odious little Whitechapel bounder。 When I think of him every nerve in my body'
〃'Don't think about him any more;' I interrupted; perceiving his strongly…suppressed emotion。 'You didn't come here to talk about him; I'm sure。 Let us dismiss him。'
〃'Well;' he replied; 'in a certain roundabout way it is slightly connected with him。 That is really my excuse for inflicting the subject upon you。 You are the only man I CAN speak to about itif I shall not bore you?'
〃'Not in the least;' I said。 'I am most interested。' As he still hesitated; I asked him point…blank what it was。
〃He appeared embarrassed。 'It is really very absurd of me;' he said; while the faintest suspicion of pink crossed his usually colourless face; 'but I feel I must talk to somebody about it。 The fact is; my dear Mac; I am in love。'
〃'Capital!' I cried; 'I'm delighted to hear it。' (I thought it might make a man of him。) 'Do I know the lady?'
〃'I am inclined to think you must have seen her;' he replied; 'she was wi