战争与和平(上)-第192章

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h　act；　she　felt　harassed　and　excited；　and　the　cause　of　that　excitement　was　Kuragin；　whom　she　could　not　help　watching。　As　they　came　out　of　the　theatre　Anatole　came　up　to　them；　called　their　carriage　and　helped　them　into　it。　As　he　assisted　Natasha　he　pressed　her　arm　above　the　elbow。　Natasha；　flushed　and　excited；　looked　round　at　him。　He　gazed　at　her　with　flashing　eyes　and　a　tender　smile。
It　was　only　on　getting　home　that　Natasha　could　form　any　clear　idea　of　what　had　happened。　All　at　once；　remembering　Prince　Andrey；　she　was　horrified；　and　at　tea；　to　which　they　all　sat　down　after　the　theatre；　she　groaned　aloud；　and　flushing　crimson　ran　out　of　the　room。　“My　God！　I　am　ruined！”　she　said　to　herself。　“How　could　I　sink　to　such　a　depth？”　she　thought。　For　a　long　while　she　sat；　with　her　flushed　face　hidden　in　her　hands；　trying　to　get　a　clear　idea　of　what　had　happened　and　unable　to　grasp　either　what　had　happened　or　what　she　was　feeling。　Everything　seemed　to　her　dark；　obscure；　and　dreadful。　In　that　immense；　lighted　hall；　where　Duport　had　jumped　about　to　music　with　his　bare　legs　on　the　damp　boards　in　his　short　jacket　with　tinsel；　and　young　girls　and　old　men；　and　that　Ellen；　proudly　and　serenely　smiling　in　her　nakedness；　had　enthusiastically　roared　“bravo”；　there；　in　the　wake　of　that　Ellen；　all　had　been　clear　and　simple。　But　now；　alone　by　herself；　it　was　past　comprehending。　“What　does　it　mean？　What　is　that　terror　I　felt　with　him？　What　is　the　meaning　of　those　gnawings　of　conscience　I　am　feeling　now？”　she　thought。
To　no　one　but　to　her　mother　at　night　in　bed　Natasha　could　have　talked　of　what　she　was　feeling。　Sonya　she　knew；　with　her　strict　and　single…minded　view　of　things；　would　either　have　failed　to　understand　at　all；　or　would　have　been　horrified　at　the　avowal。　Natasha　all　by　herself　had　to　try　and　solve　the　riddle　that　tormented　her
“Am　I　spoilt　for　Prince　Andrey’s　love　or　not？”　she　asked　herself；　and　with　reassuring　mockery　she　answered　herself：　“What　a　fool　I　am　to　ask　such　a　thing！　What　has　happened　to　me？　Nothing。　I　have　done　nothing；　I　did　nothing　to　lead　him　on。　No　one　will　ever　know；　and　I　shall　never　see　him　again；”　she　told　herself。　“So　it’s　plain　that　nothing　has　happened；　that　there’s　nothing　to　regret；　that　Prince　Andrey　can　love　me　still。　But　why　still？　O　my　God；　my　God；　why　isn’t　he　here！”　Natasha　felt　comforted　for　a　moment；　but　again　some　instinct　told　her　that　though　that　was　all　true；　and　though　nothing　had　happened；　yet　some　instinct　told　her　that　all　the　old　purity　of　her　love　for　Prince　Andrey　was　lost。　And　again；　in　her　imagination；　she　went　over　all　her　conversation　with　Kuragin；　and　saw　again　the　face；　the　gestures；　and　the　tender　smile　of　that　handsome；　daring　man　at　the　moment　when　he　had　pressed　her　arm。


Chapter　11
ANATOLE　KURAGIN　was　staying　in　Moscow　because　his　father　had　sent　him　away　from　Petersburg；　where　he　had　been　spending　twenty　thousand　a　year　in　hard　cash　and　running　up　bills　for　as　much　more；　and　his　creditors　had　been　dunning　his　father。　The　father　informed　his　son　that　for　the　last　time　he　would　pay　half　his　debts；　but　only　on　condition　that　he　would　go　away　to　Moscow；　where　his　father　had；　by　much　exertion；　secured　a　post　for　him　as　adjutant　to　the　commander…in…chief；　and　would　try　finally　to　make　a　good　match　there。　He　suggested　to　him　either　Princess　Marya　or　Julie　Karagin。
Anatole　consented；　and　went　away　to　Moscow；　where　he　stayed　with　Pierre。　Pierre　at　first　was　by　no　means　pleased　to　receive　Anatole；　but　after　a　while　he　got　used　to　his　presence；　sometimes　accompanied　him　on　his　carousals；　and　by　way　of　loans　gave　him　money。
As　Shinshin　had　with　truth　said　of　him；　Anatole　had　won　the　hearts　of　all　the　Moscow　ladies；　especially　by　the　nonchalance　with　which　he　treated　them　and　the　preference　he　openly　showed　for　gypsy　girls　and　actresses；　with　the　most　prominent　of　whom；　Mademoiselle　George；　he　was　said　to　have　an　intrigue。　He　never　missed　a　single　drinking　party　at　Danilov’s；　or　any　other　Moscow　festivity；　spent　whole　nights　drinking；　outdoing　all　the　rest；　and　was　at　every　soirée　and　ball　in　the　best　society。　There　were　rumours　of　several　intrigues　of　his　with　Moscow　ladies；　and　at　balls　he　flirted　with　a　few　of　them。　But　he　fought　shy　of　unmarried　ladies；　especially　the　wealthy　heiresses；　who　were　most　of　them　plain。　He　had　a　good　reason　for　this；　of　which　no　one　knew　but　his　most　intimate　friends：　he　had　been　for　the　last　two　years　married。　Two　years　previously；　while　his　regiment　had　been　stationed　in　Poland；　a　Polish　landowner；　by　no　means　well…to…do；　had　forced　Anatole　to　marry　his　daughter。
Anatole　had　very　shortly　afterwards　abandoned　his　wife；　and　in　consideration　of　a　sum　of　money；　which　he　agreed　to　send　his　father…in…law；　he　was　allowed　by　the　latter　to　pass　as　a　bachelor　unmolested。
Anatole　was　very　well　satisfied　with　his　position；　with　himself；　and　with　other　people。　He　was　instinctively　and　thoroughly　convinced　that　he　could　not　possibly　live　except　just　in　the　way　he　did　live；　and　that　he　had　never　in　his　life　done　anything　base。　He　was　incapable　of　considering　either　how　his　actions　might　be　judged　by　others；　or　what　might　be　the　result　of　this　or　that　action　on　his　part。　He　was　convinced　that　just　as　the　duck　is　created　so　that　it　must　always　live　in　the　water；　so　he　was　created　by　God　such　that　he　must　spend　thirty　thousand　a　year；　and　always　take　a　good　position　in　society。　He　had　such　perfect　faith　in　this　that；　looking　at　him；　others　too　were　persuaded　of　it；　and　refused　him　neither　the　exalted　position　in　society　nor　the　money；　which　he　borrowed　right　and　left；　obviously　with　no　notion　of　repaying　it。
He　was　not　a　gambler；　at　least　he　never　greatly　cared　about　winning　money　at　cards。　He　was　not　vain。　He　did　not　care　a　straw　what　people　thought　of　him。　Still　less　could　he　have　been　reproached　with　ambition。　Several　times　he　had；　to　his　father’s　irritation；　spoiled　his　best　chances　of　a　career；　and　he　laughed　at　distinctions　of　all　kinds。　He　was　not　stingy；　and　never　refused　any　one　who　asked　him　for　anything。　What　he　loved　was　dissipation　and　women；　and　as；　according　to　his　ideas；　there　was　nothing　dishonourable　in　these　tastes；　and　as　he　was　incapable　of　considering　the　effect　on　others　of　the　gratification　of　his　tastes；　he　believed　himself　in　his　heart　to　be　an　irreproachable　man；　felt　a　genuine　contempt　for　scoundrels　and　mean　persons；　and　with　an　untroubled　conscience　held　his　head　high。　Rakes；　those　masculine　Magdalens；　have　a　secret　feeling　of　their　own　guiltlessness；　just　as　have　women　Magdalens；　founded　on　the　same　hope　of　forgiveness。　“All　will　be　forgiven　her；　because　she　loved　much；　and　all　will　be　forgiven　him；　because　he　has　enjoyed　himself　much。”
Dolohov　had　that　year　reappeared　in　Moscow　after　his　exile　and　his　Persian　adventures。　He　spent　his　time　in　luxury；　gambling；　and　dissipation；　renewed　his　friendship　with　his　old　Petersburg　comrade　Kuragin；　and　made　use　of　him　for　his　own　objects。
Anatole　sincerely　liked　Dolohov　for　his　cleverness　and　daring。　Dolohov；　for　whom　Anatole’s　name　and　rank　and　connections　were　of　use　in　ensnaring　wealthy　young　men　into　his　society　for　gambling　purposes；　made　use　of　Kuragin　without　letting　him　feel　it；　and　was　amused　by　him　too。　Apart　from　interested　motives；　for　which　he　needed　Anatole；　the　process　itself　of　controlling　another　man’s　will　was　an　enjoyment；　a　habit；　and　a　necessity　for　Dolohov。
Natasha　had　made　a　great　impression　on　Kuragin。　At　supper；　after　the　theatre；　he　analysed　to　Dolohov；　with　the　manner　of　a　connoisseur；　the　points　of　her　arms；　her　shoulders；　her　foot；　and　her　hair；　and　announced　his　intention　of　getting　up　a　flirtation　with　her。　What　might　come　of　such　a　flirtation—Anatole　was　incapable　of　considering；　and　had　no　notion；　as　he　never　had　a　notion　of　what　would　come　of　any　of　his　actions。
“She’s　pretty；　my　lad；　but　she’s　not　for　us；”　Dolohov　said　to　him。
“I’ll　tell　my　sister　to　ask　her　to　dinner；”　said　Anatole。　“Eh？”
“You’d　better　wait　till　she’s　married。…”
“You　know　I　adore　little　girls；”　said　Anatole；　“they’re　all　confusion　in　a　minute。”
“You’ve　come　to　grief　once　already　over　a　‘little　girl；’　”　said　Dolohov；　who　knew　of　Anatole’s　marriag