战争与和平(上)-第182章

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　and　deception。　Whatever　he　tried　to　be；　whatever　he　took　up；　evil　and　falsity　drove　him　back　again　and　cut　him　off　from　every　field　of　energy。　And　meanwhile　he　had　to　live；　he　had　to　be　occupied。　It　was　too　awful　to　lie　under　the　burden　of　those　insoluble　problems　of　life；　and　he　abandoned　himself　to　the　first　distraction　that　offered；　simply　to　forget　them。　He　visited　every　possible　society；　drank　a　great　deal；　went　in　for　buying　pictures；　building；　and　above　all　reading。
He　read　and　re…read　everything　he　came　across。　On　getting　home　he　would　take　up　a　book；　even　while　his　valets　were　undressing　him；　and　read　himself　to　sleep；　and　from　sleep　turned　at　once　to　gossip　in　the　drawing…rooms　and　the　club；　from　gossip　to　carousals　and　women；　from　dissipation　back　again　to　gossip；　reading；　and　wine。　Wine　was　more　and　more　becoming　a　physical　necessity　to　him；　and　at　the　same　time　a　moral　necessity。　Although　the　doctors　told　him　that　in　view　of　his　corpulence　wine　was　injurious　to　him；　he　drank　a　very　great　deal。　He　never　felt　quite　content　except　when　he　had；　almost　unconsciously；　lifted　several　glasses　of　wine　to　his　big　mouth。　Then　he　felt　agreeably　warm　all　over　his　body；　amiably　disposed　towards　all　his　fellows；　and　mentally　ready　to　respond　superficially　to　every　idea；　without　going　too　deeply　into　it。　It　was　only　after　drinking　a　bottle　or　two　of　wine　that　he　felt　vaguely　that　the　terrible　tangled　skein　of　life　which　had　terrified　him　so　before　was　not　so　terrible　as　he　had　fancied。　With　a　buzzing　in　his　head；　chatting；　listening　to　talk　or　reading　after　dinner　and　supper；　he　invariably　saw　that　tangled　skein　on　some　one　of　its　sides。　It　was　only　under　the　influence　of　wine　that　he　said　to　himself：　“Never　mind。　I’ll　disentangle　it　all；　here　I　have　a　solution　all　ready。　But　now’s　not　the　time。　I’ll　go　into　all　that　later　on！”　But　that　later　on　never　came。
In　the　morning；　before　breakfast；　all　the　old　questions　looked　as　insoluble　and　fearful　as　ever；　and　Pierre　hurriedly　snatched　up　a　book　and　rejoiced　when　any　one　came　in　to　see　him。
Sometimes　Pierre　remembered　what　he　had　been　told　of　soldiers　under　fire　in　ambuscade　when　they　have　nothing　to　do；　how　they　try　hard　to　find　occupation　so　as　to　bear　their　danger　more　easily。　And　Pierre　pictured　all　men　as　such　soldiers　trying　to　find　a　refuge　from　life：　some　in　ambition；　some　in　cards；　some　in　framing　laws；　some　in　women；　some　in　playthings；　some　in　horses；　some　in　politics；　some　in　sport；　some　in　wine；　some　in　the　government　service。　“Nothing　is　trivial；　nothing　is　important；　everything　is　the　same；　only　to　escape　from　it　as　best　one　can；”　thought　Pierre。　“Only　not　to　see　it；　that　terrible　it。”


Chapter　2
AT　THE　BEGINNING　of　the　winter　Prince　Nikolay　Andreitch　Bolkonsky　and　his　daughter　moved　to　Moscow。　His　past；　his　intellect　and　originality；　and　still　more　the　falling　off　at　about　that　time　of　the　popular　enthusiasm　for　the　rule　of　the　Tsar　Alexander　and　the　anti…French　and　patriotic　sentiments　then　prevailing　at　Moscow；　all　contributed　to　make　Prince　Nikolay　Andreitch　at　once　an　object　of　peculiar　veneration　and　the　centre　of　the　Moscow　opposition　to　the　government。
The　prince　had　greatly　aged　during　that　year。　He　had　begun　to　show　unmistakable　signs　of　failing　powers；　sudden　attacks　of　drowsiness；　and　forgetfulness　of　events　nearest　in　time；　and　exact　memory　of　remote　incidents；　and　a　childlike　vanity　in　playing　the　part　of　leader　of　the　Moscow　opposition。　But　in　spite　of　that；　when　the　old　man　came　into　the　drawing…room　in　the　evenings　to　tea；　in　his　wig　and　fur　coat；　and　on　being　incited　to　do　so　by　some　one；　began　uttering　abrupt　observations　on　the　past；　or　still　more　abrupt　and　harsh　criticisms　on　the　present—he　aroused　the　same　feeling　of　esteem　and　reverence　in　all　his　guests。　For　visitors；　that　old…fashioned　house；　with　its　huge　mirrors；　pre…revolutionary　furniture；　and　powdered　lackeys；　and　the　stern　and　shrewd　old　man；　himself　a　relic　of　a　past　age；　with　the　gentle　daughter　and　the　pretty　Frenchwoman；　both　so　reverently　devoted　to　him；　made　a　stately　and　agreeable　spectacle。　But　those　visitors　did　not　reflect　that；　apart　from　the　couple　of　hours　during　which　they　saw　the　household；　there　were　twenty…two　hours　of　the　day　and　night　during　which　the　secret；　private　life　of　the　house　went　on　its　accustomed　way。
That　inner　life　had　become　very　hard　for　Princess　Marya　of　late　in　Moscow。　She　was　deprived　in　Moscow　of　her　two　greatest　pleasures—talks　with　God’s　folk　and　the　solitude　which　had　refreshed　her　spirit　at　Bleak　Hills；　and　she　had　none　of　the　advantages　and　pleasures　of　town　life。　She　did　not　go　into　society；　every　one　knew　that　her　father　would　not　allow　her　to　go　anywhere　without　him；　and　owing　to　his　failing　health　he　could　go　nowhere　himself。　She　was　not　even　invited　now　to　dinner…parties　or　balls。　Princess　Marya　had　laid　aside　all　hopes　of　marriage。　She　saw　the　coldness　and　hostility　with　which　the　old　prince　received　and　dismissed　the　young　men；　possible　suitors；　who　sometimes　appeared　at　the　house。　Friends；　Princess　Marya　now　had　none；　during　this　stay　in　Moscow　she　had　lost　all　faith　in　the　two　friends　who　had　been　nearest　to　her。　Mademoiselle　Bourienne；　with　whom　she　had　never　been　able　to　be　perfectly　open；　she　now　regarded　with　dislike；　and　for　certain　reasons　kept　at　a　distance。　Julie；　with　whom　Princess　Marya　had　kept　up　an　unbroken　correspondence　for　five　years；　was　in　Moscow。　When　Princess　Marya　renewed　her　personal　relations　with　her；　she　felt　her　former　friend　to　be　utterly　alien　to　her。　Julie；　who　had　become；　by　the　death　of　her　brothers；　one　of　the　wealthiest　heiresses　in　Moscow；　was　at　that　time　engrossed　in　a　giddy　whirl　of　fashionable　amusements。　She　was　surrounded　by　young　men；　whom　she　believed　to　have　become　suddenly　appreciative　of　her　qualities。　Julie　was　at　that　stage　when　a　young　lady　is　somewhat　past　her　first　youth　in　society　and　feels　that　her　last　chance　of　marrying　has　come；　and　that　now　or　never　her　fate　must　be　decided。　With　a　mournful　smile　Princess　Marya　reflected　every　Thursday　that　she　had　now　no　one　to　write　to；　seeing　that　Julie　was　here　and　saw　her　every　week；　though　her　friend’s　actual　presence　gave　her　no　sort　of　pleasure。　Like　the　old　French　émigré；　who　declined　to　marry　the　lady　with　whom　he　had　for　so　many　years　spent　his　evenings；　she　regretted　that　Julie　was　here　and　she　had　no　one　to　write　to。　In　Moscow　Princess　Marya　had　no　one　to　speak　to；　no　one　to　confide　her　sorrows　to；　and　many　fresh　sorrows　fell　to　her　lot　about　this　time。　The　time　for　Prince　Andrey’s　return　and　marriage　was　approaching；　and　his　commission　to　her　to　prepare　her　father’s　mind　was　so　far　from　being　successfully　carried　out　that　the　whole　thing　seemed　hopeless；　and　any　reference　to　the　young　Countess　Rostov　infuriated　the　old　prince；　who　was　for　the　most　part　out　of　humour　at　all　times　now。　Another　trouble　that　weighed　on　Princess　Marya　of　late　was　due　to　the　lessons　she　gave　to　her　six…year…old　nephew。　In　her　relations　with　little　Nikolay　she　recognised　to　her　consternation　symptoms　of　her　father’s　irritable　character　in　herself。　However　often　she　told　herself　that　she　must　not　let　herself　lose　her　temper；　when　teaching　her　nephew；　almost　every　time　she　sat　down　with　a　pointer　showing　him　the　French　alphabet；　she　so　longed　to　hasten；　to　make　easy　the　process　of　transferring　her　knowledge　to　the　child；　who　was　by　now　always　afraid　his　auntie　would　be　angry　the　next　moment；　that　at　the　slightest　inattention　she　was　quivering　in　nervous　haste　and　vexation；　she　raised　her　voice　and　sometimes　pulled　him　by　his　little　hand　and　stood　him　in　the　corner。　When　she　had　stood　him　in　the　corner　she　would　begin　to　cry　herself　over　her　evil；　wicked　nature；　and　little　Nikolay；　his　sobs　vying　with　hers；　would　come　unbidden　out　of　the　corner　to　pull　her　wet　hands　from　her　face　and　try　to　comfort　her。　But　the　greatest；　far　the　greatest　of　the　princess’s　burdens　was　her　father’s　irascibility；　which　was　invariably　directed　against　his　daughter；　and　had　of　late　reached　the　point　of　cruelty。　Had　he　forced　her　to　spend　the　night　bowing　to　the　ground；　had　he　beaten　her；　or　made　her　carry　in　wood　and　water；　it　would　never　have　entered　her　head