战争与和平(上)-第157章

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ossibility　of　which　he　had　not　dreamed　of　in　himself。　He　looked　at　Natasha　singing；　and　something　new　and　blissful　stirred　in　his　soul。　He　was　happy；　and　at　the　same　time　he　was　sad。　He　certainly　had　nothing　to　weep　about；　but　he　was　ready　to　weep。　For　what？　For　his　past　love？　For　the　little　princess？　For　his　lost　illusions？　…　For　his　hopes　for　the　future？　…　Yes；　and　no。　The　chief　thing　which　made　him　ready　to　weep　was　a　sudden；　vivid　sense　of　the　fearful　contrast　between　something　infinitely　great　and　illimitable　existing　in　him；　and　something　limited　and　material；　which　he　himself　was；　and　even　she　was。
This　contrast　made　his　heart　ache；　and　rejoiced　him　while　she　was　singing。
As　soon　as　Natasha　had　finished　singing；　she　went　up　to　him；　and　asked　how　he　liked　her　voice。　She　asked　this；　and　was　abashed　after　saying　it；　conscious　that　she　ought　not　to　have　asked　such　a　question。　He　smiled；　looking　at　her；　and　said　he　liked　her　singing；　as　he　liked　everything　she　did。
It　was　late　in　the　evening　when　Prince　Andrey　left　the　Rostovs’。　He　went　to　bed　from　the　habit　of　going　to　bed；　but　soon　saw　that　he　could　not　sleep。　He　lighted　a　candle　and　sat　up　in　bed；　then　got　up；　then　lay　down　again；　not　in　the　least　wearied　by　his　sleeplessness：　he　felt　a　new　joy　in　his　soul；　as　though　he　had　come　out　of　a　stuffy　room　into　the　open　daylight。　It　never　even　occurred　to　him　that　he　was　in　love　with　this　little　Rostov　girl。　He　was　not　thinking　about　her。　He　only　pictured　her　to　himself；　and　the　whole　of　life　rose　before　him　in　a　new　light　as　he　did　so。　“Why　do　I　struggle？　Why　am　I　troubled　in　this　narrow　cramped　routine；　when　life；　all　life；　with　all　its　joys；　lies　open　before　me？”　he　said　to　himself。　And　for　the　first　time　for　a　very　long　while；　he　began　making　happy　plans　for　the　future。　He　made　up　his　mind　that　he　ought　to　look　after　his　son’s　education；　to　find　a　tutor；　and　entrust　the　child　to　him。　Then　he　ought　to　retire　from　the　army；　and　go　abroad；　see　England；　Switzerland；　Italy。　“I　must　take　advantage　of　my　liberty；　while　I　feel　so　much　youth　and　strength　in　me；”　he　told　himself。　“Pierre　was　right　in　saying　that　one　must　believe　in　the　possibility　of　happiness；　in　order　to　be　happy；　and　now　I　do　believe　in　it。　Let　us　leave　the　dead　to　bury　the　dead；　but　while　one　is　living；　one　must　live　and　be　happy；”　he　thought。


Chapter　20
ONE　MORNING　Colonel　Adolphe　Berg；　whom　Pierre　knew　just　as　he　knew　every　one　in　Moscow　and　Petersburg；　called　upon　him。　He　was　wearing　a　brand…new　uniform；　and　had　his　powdered　locks　standing　up　over　his　forehead；　as　worn　by　the　Tsar　Alexander　Pavlovitch。
“I　have　just　been　calling　on　the　countess；　your　spouse；　and　to　my　misfortune；　my　request　could　not　be　granted。　I　hope　I　shall　be　more　fortunate　with　you；　count；”　he　said；　smiling。
“What　is　it　you　desire；　colonel？　I　am　at　your　disposal。”
“I　am　by　now；　quite　settled　in　my　new　quarters；”　Berg　informed　him　with　perfect　conviction　that　to　hear　this　fact　could　not　but　be　agreeable；　“and　so　I　was　desirous　of　giving　a　little　soirée　for　my　friends　and　my　spouse。”　（He　smiled　still　more　blandly。）　“I　meant　to　ask　the　countess　and　you　to　do　me　the　honour　to　come　to　us　for　a　cup　of　tea；　and　…　to　supper。”
Only　the　Countess　Elena　Vassilyevna；　who　considered　it　beneath　her　to　associate　with　nobodies　like　the　Bergs；　could　have　had　the　cruelty　to　refuse　such　an　invitation。　Berg　explained　so　clearly　why　he　wanted　to　gather　together　a　small　and　select　company　at　his　new　rooms；　and　why　it　would　be　agreeable　to　him　to　do　so；　and　why　he　would　grudge　spending　money　on　cards；　or　anything　else　harmful；　but　was　ready　for　the　sake　of　good　society　to　incur　expense；　that　Pierre　could　not　refuse；　and　promised　to　come。
“Only　not　late；　count；　if　I　may　venture　to　beg。　Ten　minutes　to　eight；　I　venture　to　beg。　We　will　make　up　a　party　for　boston。　Our　general　is　coming；　he　is　very　kind　to　me。　We　will　have　a　little　supper；　count；　so　I　shall　esteem　it　an　honour。”
Contrary　to　his　usual　habit　（he　was　almost　always　late）　Pierre　arrived　at　the　Bergs’　not　at　ten　minutes　to　eight；　but　at　a　quarter　to　eight。
The　Bergs　had　made　all　necessary　preparations　for　their　little　party；　and　were　quite　ready　to　receive　their　guests。
Berg　and　his　wife　were　sitting　in　a　new；　clean；　light　study；　furnished　with　little　busts　and　pictures　and　new　furniture。　Berg；　with　his　new　uniform　closely　buttoned　up；　sat　beside　his　wife；　and　was　explaining　to　her　that　one　always　could　and　ought　to　cultivate　the　acquaintance　of　people　above　one—for　only　then　is　there　anything　agreeable　in　acquaintances。　“You　pick　up　something；　you　can　put　in　a　word　for　something。　Look　at　me　now；　how　I　used　to　manage　in　the　lower　grades　（Berg　reckoned　his　life　not　by　years　but　by　promotions）。　“My　comrades　are　nothing　still；　while　I’m　a　lieutenant…colonel。　I　have　the　happiness　of　being　your　husband”　（he　got　up　and　kissed　Vera’s　hand；　but　on　the　way　turned　back　the　corner　of　the　rug；　which　was　rucked…up）。　“And　how　did　I　obtain　all　this？　Chiefly　by　knowing　how　to　select　my　acquaintances。　It　goes　without　saying；　of　course；　that　one　has　to　be　conscientious　and　punctual　in　the　discharge　of　one’s　duties。”
Berg　smiled　with　a　sense　of　his　own　superiority　over　a　mere　weak　woman；　and　paused；　reflecting　that　this　charming　wife　of　his　was；　after　all；　a　weak　woman；　who　could　never　attain　all　that　constituted　a　man’s　dignity；—ein　Mann　zu　sein。　Vera　smiled；　too；　at　the　same　time　with　a　sense　of　her　superiority　over　her　conscientious；　excellent　husband；　who　yet；　like　all　men；　according　to　Vera’s　ideas　of　them；　took　such　a　mistaken　view　of　life。　Berg；　judging　from　his　wife；　considered　all　women　weak　and　foolish。　Vera；　judging　from　her　husband　only；　and　generalising　from　her　observation　of　him；　supposed　that　all　men　ascribed　common…sense　to　none　but　themselves；　and　at　the　same　time　had　no　understanding　for　anything；　and　were　conceited　and　egoistic。
Berg　got　up；　and　cautiously　embracing　his　wife　so　as　not　to　crush　the　lace　bertha；　for　which　he　had　paid　a　round　sum；　he　kissed　her　just　on　her　lips。
“There’s　only　one　thing：　we　mustn’t　have　children　too　soon；”　he　said；　by　a　connection　of　ideas　of　which　he　was　himself　unconscious。
“Yes；”　answered　Vera；　“I　don’t　at　all　desire　that。　We　must　live　for　society。”
“Princess　Yusupov　was　wearing　one　just　like　that；”　said　Berg；　pointing　with　a　happy　and　good…humoured　smile　to　the　bertha。
At　that　moment　they　were　informed　that　Count　Bezuhov　had　arrived。　Both　the　young　couple　exchanged　glances　of　self…satisfaction；　each　mentally　claiming　the　credit　of　this　visit。
“See　what　comes　of　knowing　how　to　make　acquaintances；”　thought　Berg。　“See　what　comes　of　behaving　properly！”
“But；　please；　when　I　am　entertaining　guests；”　said　Vera；　“don’t　you　interrupt　me；　because　I　know　with　what　to　entertain　each　of　them；　and　what　to　say　in　the　company　of　different　people。”
Berg；　too；　smiled。
“Oh；　but　sometimes　men　must　have　their　masculine　conversation；”　he　said。
Pierre　was　shown　into　the　little　drawing…room；　in　which　it　was　impossible　to　sit　down　without　disturbing　the　symmetry；　tidiness；　and　order；　and　consequently　it　was　quite　comprehensible；　and　not　strange；　that　Berg　should　magnanimously　offer　to　disturb　the　symmetry　of　the　armchair　or　of　the　sofa　for　an　honoured　guest；　and　apparently　finding　himself　in　miserable　indecision　in　the　matter；　should　leave　his　guest　to　solve　the　question　of　selection。　Pierre　destroyed　the　symmetry；　moved　out　a　chair　for　himself；　and　Berg　and　Vera　promptly　began　their　soirée；　interrupting　each　other　in　their　efforts　to　entertain　their　guest。
Vera；　deciding　in　her　own　mind　that　Pierre　ought　to　be　entertained　with　conversation　about　the　French　Embassy；　promptly　embarked　upon　that　subject。　Berg；　deciding　that　masculine　conversation　was　what　was　required；　interrupted　his　wife’s　remarks　by　reference　to　the　question　of　war　with　Austria；　and　made　an　unconscious　jump　from　that　general　subject　to　personal　considerations　upon　the　proposal　made　him　to　take　part　in　the　Austrain　campaign；　and　the　reasons　which　had　led　him　to　decline　it。　Although　the　conversation　was　extremely　disconnected；　and　Vera　resented　the　intervention　of　the　masculine　element；　both　the　young　p