the essays of montaigne, v6-第3章

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excuses　the　precipitation　of　our　intelligence；　so　suddenly　come　to
perfection；　saying；　that　destined　to　have　so　short　a　continuance；　as
begun　so　late　（for　we　were　both　full…grown　men；　and　he　some　years　the
older）；　there　was　no　time　to　lose；　nor　were　we　tied　to　conform　to　the
example　of　those　slow　and　regular　friendships；　that　require　so　many
precautions　of　long　preliminary　conversation：　This　has　no　other　idea　than
that　of　itself；　and　can　only　refer　to　itself：　this　is　no　one　special
consideration；　nor　two；　nor　three；　nor　four；　nor　a　thousand；　'tis　I　know
not　what　quintessence　of　all　this　mixture；　which；　seizing　my　whole　will；
carried　it　to　plunge　and　lose　itself　in　his；　and　that　having　seized　his
whole　will；　brought　it　back　with　equal　concurrence　and　appetite　to　plunge
and　lose　itself　in　mine。　　I　may　truly　say　lose；　reserving　nothing　to
ourselves　that　was　either　his　or　mine。　＇All　this　relates　to　Estienne　de
la　Boetie。＇

When　Laelius；　＇Cicero；　De　Amicit。；　c。　II。＇　in　the　presence　of　the
Roman　consuls；　who　after　thay　had　sentenced　Tiberius　Gracchus；　prosecuted
all　those　who　had　had　any　familiarity　with　him　also；　came　to　ask　Caius
Blosius；　who　was　his　chiefest　friend；　how　much　he　would　have　done　for
him；　and　that　he　made　answer：　　〃All　things。〃　　〃How！　　All　things！〃　　said
Laelius。　　〃And　what　if　he　had　commanded　you　to　fire　our　temples？〃　　〃He
would　never　have　commanded　me　that；〃　replied　Blosius。　　〃But　what　if　he
had？〃　said　Laelius。　　〃I　would　have　obeyed　him；〃　said　the　other。　　If　he
was　so　perfect　a　friend　to　Gracchus　as　the　histories　report　him　to　have
been；　there　was　yet　no　necessity　of　offending　the　consuls　by　such　a　bold
confession；　though　he　might　still　have　retained　the　assurance　he　had　of
Gracchus'　disposition。　　However；　those　who　accuse　this　answer　as
seditious；　do　not　well　understand　the　mystery；　nor　presuppose；　as　it　was
true；　that　he　had　Gracchus'　will　in　his　sleeve；　both　by　the　power　of　a
friend；　and　the　perfect　knowledge　he　had　of　the　man：　they　were　more
friends　than　citizens；　more　friends　to　one　another　than　either　enemies　or
friends　to　their　country；　or　than　friends　to　ambition　and　innovation；
having　absolutely　given　up　themselves　to　one　another；　either　held
absolutely　the　reins　of　the　other's　inclination；　and　suppose　all　this
guided　by　virtue；　and　all　this　by　the　conduct　of　reason；　which　also
without　these　it　had　not　been　possible　to　do；　Blosius'　answer　was　such　as
it　ought　to　be。　　If　any　of　their　actions　flew　out　of　the　handle；　they
were　neither　（according　to　my　measure　of　friendship）　friends　to　one
another；　nor　to　themselves。　　As　to　the　rest；　this　answer　carries　no　worse
sound；　than　mine　would　do　to　one　that　should　ask　me：　〃If　your　will　should
command　you　to　kill　your　daughter；　would　you　do　it？〃　and　that　I　should
make　answer；　that　I　would；　for　this　expresses　no　consent　to　such　an　act；
forasmuch　as　I　do　not　in　the　least　suspect　my　own　will；　and　as　little
that　of　such　a　friend。　　'Tis　not　in　the　power　of　all　the　eloquence　in　the
world；　to　dispossess　me　of　the　certainty　I　have　of　the　intentions　and
resolutions　of　my　friend；　nay；　no　one　action　of　his；　what　face　soever　it
might　bear；　could　be　presented　to　me；　of　which　I　could　not　presently；
and　at　first　sight；　find　out　the　moving　cause。　　Our　souls　had　drawn　so
unanimously　together；　they　had　considered　each　other　with　so　ardent　an
affection；　and　with　the　like　affection　laid　open　the　very　bottom　of　our
hearts　to　one　another's　view；　that　I　not　only　knew　his　as　well　as　my　own；
but　should　certainly　in　any　concern　of　mine　have　trusted　my　interest　much
more　willingly　with　him；　than　with　myself。

Let　no　one；　therefore；　rank　other　common　friendships　with　such　a　one　as
this。　　I　have　had　as　much　experience　of　these　as　another；　and　of　the　most
perfect　of　their　kind：　but　I　do　not　advise　that　any　should　confound　the
rules　of　the　one　and　the　other；　for　they　would　find　themselves　much
deceived。　　In　those　other　ordinary　friendships；　you　are　to　walk　with
bridle　in　your　hand；　with　prudence　and　circumspection；　for　in　them　the
knot　is　not　so　sure　that　a　man　may　not　half　suspect　it　will　slip。　　〃Love
him；〃　said　Chilo；＇Aulus　Gellius；　i。　3。＇　〃so　as　if　you　were　one　day　to
hate　him；　and　hate　him　so　as　you　were　one　day　to　love　him。〃　　This
precept；　though　abominable　in　the　sovereign　and　perfect　friendship　I
speak　of；　is　nevertheless　very　sound　as　to　the　practice　of　the　ordinary
and　customary　ones；　and　to　which　the　saying　that　Aristotle　had　so
frequent　in　his　mouth；　〃O　my　friends；　there　is　no　friend；〃　may　very　fitly
be　applied。　　In　this　noble　commerce；　good　offices；　presents；　and
benefits；　by　which　other　friendships　are　supported　and　maintained；　do　not
deserve　so　much　as　to　be　mentioned；　and　the　reason　is　the　concurrence　of
our　wills；　for；　as　the　kindness　I　have　for　myself　receives　no　increase；
for　anything　I　relieve　myself　withal　in　time　of　need　（whatever　the　Stoics
say）；　and　as　I　do　not　find　myself　obliged　to　myself　for　any　service　I　do
myself：　so　the　union　of　such　friends；　being　truly　perfect；　deprives　them
of　all　idea　of　such　duties；　and　makes　them　loathe　and　banish　from　their
conversation　these　words　of　division　and　distinction；　benefits；
obligation；　acknowledgment；　entreaty；　thanks；　and　the　like。　　All　things；
wills；　thoughts；　opinions；　goods；　wives；　children；　honours；　and　lives；
being　in　effect　common　betwixt　them；　and　that　absolute　concurrence　of
affections　being　no　other　than　one　soul　in　two　bodies　（according　to　that
very　proper　definition　of　Aristotle）；　they　can　neither　lend　nor　give
anything　to　one　another。　　This　is　the　reason　why　the　lawgivers；　to　honour
marriage　with　some　resemblance　of　this　divine　alliance；　interdict　all
gifts　betwixt　man　and　wife；　inferring　by　that；　that　all　should　belong　to
each　of　them；　and　that　they　have　nothing　to　divide　or　to　give　to　each
other。

If；　in　the　friendship　of　which　I　speak；　one　could　give　to　the　other；　the
receiver　of　the　benefit　would　be　the　man　that　obliged　his　friend；　for
each　of　them　contending　and　above　all　things　studying　how　to　be　useful　to
the　other；　he　that　administers　the　occasion　is　the　liberal　man；　in　giving
his　friend　the　satisfaction　of　doing　that　towards　him　which　above　all
things　he　most　desires。　　When　the　philosopher　Diogenes　wanted　money；　he
used　to　say；　that　he　redemanded　it　of　his　friends；　not　that　he　demanded
it。　　And　to　let　you　see　the　practical　working　of　this；　I　will　here
produce　an　ancient　and　singular　example。　　Eudamidas；　a　Corinthian；　had
two　friends；　Charixenus　a　Sicyonian　and　Areteus　a　Corinthian；　this　man
coming　to　die；　being　poor；　and　his　two　friends　rich；　he　made　his　will
after　this　manner。　　〃I　bequeath　to　Areteus　the　maintenance　of　my　mother；
to　support　and　provide　for　her　in　her　old　age；　and　to　Charixenus　I
bequeath　the　care　of　marrying　my　daughter；　and　to　give　her　as　good　a
portion　as　he　is　able；　and　in　case　one　of　these　chance　to　die；　I　hereby
substitute　the　survivor　in　his　place。〃　　They　who　first　saw　this　will　made
themselves　very　merry　at　the　contents：　but　the　legatees；　being　made
acquainted　with　it；　accepted　it　with　very　great　content；　and　one　of　them；
Charixenus；　dying　within　five　days　after；　and　by　that　means　the　charge　of
both　duties　devolving　solely　on　him；　Areteus　nurtured　the　old　woman　with
very　great　care　and　tenderness；　and　of　five　talents　he　had　in　estate；　he
gave　two　and　a　half　in　marriage　with　an　only　daughter　he　had　of　his　own；
and　two　and　a　half　in　marriage　with　the　daughter　of　Eudamidas；　and　on　one
and　the　same　day　solemnised　both　their　nuptials。

This　example　is　very　full；　if　one　thing　were　not　to　be　objected；　namely
the　multitude　of　friends　for　the　perfect　friendship　I　speak　of　is
indivisible；　each　one　gives　himself　so　entirely　to　his　friend；　that　he
has　nothing　left　to　distribute　to　others：　on　the　contrary；　is　sorry　that
he　is　not　double；　treble；　or　quadruple；　and　that　he　has　not　many　souls
and　many　wills；　to　confer　them　all　upon　this　one　object。　　Common
friendships　will　admit　of　division；　one　may　love　the　beauty　of　this
person；　the　good…humour　of　that；　the　liberality　of　a　third；　the　paternal
affection　of　a　fourth；　the　fraternal　love　of　a　fifth；　and　so　of　the　rest：
but　this　friendship　that