hemingway, ernest - garden of eden-第42章

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All　right　Bourne；　he　thought　as　he　began　to　drink　the　second　beer；　don't　spend　time　thinking　how　bad　things　are　because　you　know。　You　have　three　choices。　Try　to　remember　one　that　is　gone　and　write　it　again。　Second；　you　can　try　a　new　one。　And　third；　write　on　the　god　damned　narrative。　So　sharpen　up　and　take　the　best　one。　You　always　gambled　when　you　could　bet　on　yourself。　Never　bet　on　anything　that　can　talk；　your　father　said　and　you　said；　Except　yourself。　And　he　said；　Not　me；　Davey；　but　pile　it　on　yourself　sometime　you　iron…hearted　little　bastard。　He　meant　to　say　cold…hearted　but　he　turned　it　kindly　with　his　gently　lying　mouth。　Or　maybe　he　meant　it。　Don't　con　yourself　on　Tuborg　beer。

So　take　the　best　one　and　write　one　new　and　good　as　you　can。　And　remember；　Marita　has　been　hit　as　badly　as　you。　Maybe　worse。　So　gamble。　She　cares　as　much　for　what　we　lost　as　you　do。

Chapter　Twenty…nine




WHEN　HE　FINALLY　gave　up　writing　that　day　it　was　afternoon。　He　had　started　a　sentence　as　soon　as　he　had　gone　into　his　working　room　and　had　completed　it　but　he　could　write　nothing　after　it。　He　crossed　it　out　and　started　another　sentence　and　again　came　to　the　complete　blankness。　He　was　unable　to　write　the　sentence　that　should　follow　although　he　knew　it。　He　wrote　a　first　simple　declarative　sentence　again　and　it　was　impossible　for　him　to　put　down　the　next　sentence　on　paper。　At　the　end　of　two　hours　it　was　the　same。　He　could　not　write　more　than　a　single　sentence　and　the　sentences　themselves　were　increasingly　simple　and　completely　dull。　He　kept　at　it　for　four　hours　before　he　knew　that　resolution　was　powerless　against　what　had　happened。　He　admitted　it　with　out　accepting　it；　closed　and　put　away　the　notebook　with　the　rows　of　crossed　out　lines　and　went　to　find　the　girl。

She　was　on　the　terrace　in　the　sun　reading　and　when　she　looked　up　and　saw　his　face　she　said；　〃No？〃

〃Worse　than　no。〃

〃Not　at　all？〃

〃Nope。〃
238　239

。　。
〃Let's　have　a　drink；〃　Marita　said。
〃Good；〃　said　David。

They　were　inside　at　the　bar　and　the　day　had　come　in　with　them。　It　was　as　good　as　the　day　before　and　perhaps　better　since　summer　should　have　been　gone　and　each　warm　day　was　an　extra　thing。　We　should　not　waste　it；　David　thought。　We　should　try　to　make　it　good　and　save　it　if　we　can。　He　mixed　the　martinis　and　poured　them　and　when　they　tasted　them　they　were　icy　cold　and　dry。

〃You　were　right　to　try　this　morning；〃　Marita　said。　〃But　let's　not　think　about　it　any　more　today。〃

〃Good；〃　he　said。

He　reached　for　the　bottle　of　Gordon's；　the　Noilly　Prat　and　the　stirring　pitcher；　poured　out　the　water　from　the　ice；　and　using　his　empty　glass　commenced　to　measure　out　two　more　drinks。

〃It's　a　lovely　day；〃　he　said。　〃What　should　we　do？〃

〃Let's　go　to　swim　now；〃　Marita　said。　〃So　we　won't　waste　the　day。〃

〃Good；〃　David　said。　〃Should　I　tell　Madame　that　we'll　be　late　for　lunch？〃

〃She　put　a　cold　lunch　up；〃　Marita　said。　〃I　thought　that　prob　ably　you'd　like　to　swim　however　work　went。〃

〃That　was　intelligent；〃　David　said。　〃How　is　Madame？〃

〃She　has　a　slightly　discolored　eye；〃　Marita　said。

Marita　laughed。

They　drove　up　the　road　and　around　the　promontory　through　the　forest　and　left　the　car　in　the　broken　shade　of　the　pine　woods　and　carried　the　lunch　basket　and　the　beach　gear　down　the　trail　to　the　cove。　There　was　a　little　breeze　from　the　east　and　the　sea　was　dark　and　blue　as　they　came　down　through　the　stone　pines。　The　rocks　were　red　and　the　sand　of　the　cove　was　yellow　and　wrinkled　and　the　water；　as　they　came　to　it；　clean　and　now　amber　clear　over　the　sand。　They　put　the　basket　and　the　rucksack　in　the

shade　of　the　biggest　rock　and　undressed　and　David　climbed　the　tall　rock　to　dive。　He　stood　there　naked　and　brown　in　the　sun　looking　out　to　the　sea。

〃Want　to　dive？〃　he　called。

She　shook　her　head。

〃I'll　wait　for　you。〃

〃No；〃　she　called　up　and　waded　out　into　the　water　up　to　her　thighs。

〃How　is　it？〃　David　called　down。

〃Much　cooler　than　it's　ever　been。　Almost　cold。〃

〃Good；〃　he　said；　and　as　she　watched　him　and　waded；　the　water　came　over　her　belly　and　touched　her　breasts　and　he　straightened；　rose　on　his　toes；　seemed　to　hang　slowly　without　falling　and　then　knifed　out　and　down；　making　a　boil　in　the　water　that　a　porpoise　might　have　made　reentering　slickly　into　the　hole　that　he　had　made　in　rising。　She　swam　out　toward　the　circle　of　milling　water　and　then　he　rose　beside　her　and　held　her　up　and　close　and　then　put　his　salty　mouth　against　her　own。

〃File　est　bonne；　la　mer；〃　he　said。　〃Toi　aussi。〃

They　swam　out　of　the　cove　and　beyond　into　the　deep　water　past　where　the　mountain　dropped　down　into　the　sea；　and　lay　on　their　backs　and　floated。　The　water　was　colder　than　it　had　been　but　the　very　top　was　warmed　a　little　and　Marita　floated　with　her　back　arched　high；　her　head　all　underwater　but　her　nose；　and　her　brown　breasts　were　lapped　gently　by　the　movement　the　light　breeze　gave　the　sea。　Her　eyes　were　shut　against　the　sun　and　David　was　beside　her　in　the　water。　His　arm　was　under　her　head　and　then　he　kissed　the　tip　of　her　left　breast　and　then　the　other　breast。

〃They　taste　like　the　sea；〃　he　said。

〃Let's　go　to　sleep　out　here。〃

〃Could　you？〃

〃It's　too　hard　to　keep　my　back　arched。〃

〃Let's　swim　way　out　and　then　swim　in。〃

。　。
〃All　right。〃
They　swam　far　out；　further　than　they　had　ever　swum　before；　far　enough　so　they　could　see　past　the　next　headland　and　on　out　until　they　could　see　the　broken　purple　line　of　the　mountains　behind　the　forest。　They　lay　there　in　the　water　and　watched　the　coast。　Then　they　swam　in　slowly。　They　stopped　to　rest　when　they　lost　the　mountains　and　again　when　they　lost　the　headland　and　then　swam　slowly　and　strongly　on　in　past　the　entrance　to　the　cove　and　pulled　themselves　out　on　the　beach。

〃Are　you　tired？〃　David　asked。

〃Very；〃　Marita　said。　She　had　never　swum　that　far　before。

〃Are　you　still　pounding？〃

〃Oh　I'm　fine。〃

David　walked　up　the　beach　and　over　to　the　rock　and　found　one　of　the　bottles　of　Tavel　and　two　towels。

〃You　look　like　a　seal；〃　David　said　sitting　down　beside　her　on　the　sand。

He　handed　her　the　Tavel　and　she　drank　from　the　bottle　and　handed　it　back。　He　took　a　long　drink　and　then　on　the　smooth　dry　sand；　stretched　out　in　the　sun；　the　lunch　basket　by　them　and　the　wine　cool　as　they　drank　from　the　bottle；　Marita　said；　〃Catherine　wouldn't　have　gotten　tired。〃

〃The　hell　she　wouldn't。　She　never　swam　that　far。〃

〃Truly？〃

〃We　swam　a　long　way；　girl。　I　was　never　out　where　we　could　see　those　backdrop　mountains　before。〃

〃All　right；〃　she　said。　〃There　isn't　anything　we　can　do　about　her　today　so　let's　not　think　about　it。　David？〃

〃Yes。〃

〃Do　you　still　love　me？〃

〃Yes。　Very　much。〃

〃Perhaps　I　made　a　great　mistake　with　you　and　you're　just　being　kind　to　me。

〃You　didn't　make　any　mistakes　and　I'm　not　being　kind　to　you。

Marita　took　a　handful　of　radishes　and　ate　them　slowly　and　drank　some　wine。　The　radishes　were　young　and　crisp　and　sharp　in　flavor。

〃You　don't　have　to　worry　about　working；〃　she　said。　〃I　know。　That　will　be　all　right。〃

〃Sure；〃　David　said。

He　cut　one　of　the　artichoke　hearts　up　with　the　fork　and　ate　a　chunk　swirled　in　the　mustard　sauce　Madame　had　made。

〃May　I　have　the　Tavel？〃　Marita　said。　She　took　a　good　swallow　of　the　wine　and　set　the　bottle　down　by　David　putting　its　base　firmly　in　the　sand　and　leaning　it　against　the　basket。　〃Isn't　it　a　good　lunch　Madame　made；　David？〃

〃It's　an　excellent　lunch。　Did　Aurol　really　give　her　a　black　eye？〃

〃Not　a　real　one。〃

〃She　has　a　bad　tongue　with　him。〃

〃There's　the　difference　in　age　and　he　was　within　his　rights　to　hit　her　if　she　was　insulting。　She　said　so。　At　the　end。　And　she　sent　you　messages。

'What　messages？〃

〃Just　loving　messages。

〃She　loves　you；〃　David　said。

〃No。　You　stupid。　She's　only　on　my　side。〃

〃There　aren't　any　sides　anymore；〃　David　said。

〃No；〃　Marita　said。　〃And　we　didn't　try　to　make　sides。　It　just　happened。〃

〃It　happened　all　right。〃　David　handed　her　the　jar　with　the　cut　up　artichoke　heart　and　the　dressing　and　found　the　second　bottle　of　Tavel。　It　was　still　cool。　He　took　a　long　drink　of　the　wine。　〃We've　been　burned　out；〃　he　said。　〃Crazy　woman　burned　out　the　Bournes。〃

〃Are　we　the　Bournes？〃

〃Sure。　We're　the　Bournes。　It　may　take