the research magnificent-第11章

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ertain　portentousness；　and　we　would　go　out　pregnantly　making　superficial　remarks　about　the　school　cricket　and　return；　discussing　botany；　with　nothing　said。　〃His　heart　failed　him。　〃Once　or　twice；　too；　he　seemed　to　be　reaching　out　at　me　from　the　school　pulpit。　〃I　think　that　my　father　did　manage　to　convey　to　me　his　belief　that　there　were　these　fine　things；　honour；　high　aims；　nobilities。　　If　I　did　not　get　this　belief　from　him　then　I　do　not　know　how　I　got　it。　But　it　was　as　if　he　hinted　at　a　treasure　that　had　got　very　dusty　in　an　attic；　a　treasure　which　he　hadn't　himself　been　able　to　spend。　。　。　。〃　The　father　who　had　intended　to　mould　his　son　ended　by　watching　him　grow；　not　always　with　sympathy　or　understanding。　　He　was　an　overworked　man　assailed　by　many　futile　anxieties。　　One　sees　him　striding　about　the　establishment　with　his　gown　streaming　out　behind　him　urging　on　the　groundsman　or　the　gardener；　or　dignified；　expounding　the　particular　advantages　of　Seagate　to　enquiring　parents；　one　sees　him　unnaturally　cheerful　and　facetious　at　the　midday　dinner　table；　one　imagines　him　keeping　up　high　aspirations　in　a　rather　too　hastily　scribbled　sermon　in　the　school　pulpit；　or　keeping　up　an　enthusiasm　for　beautiful　language　in　a　badly…prepared　lesson　on　Virgil；　or　expressing　unreal　indignation　and　unjustifiably　exalted　sentiments　to　evil　doers；　and　one　realizes　his　disadvantage　against　the　quiet　youngster　whose　retentive　memory　was　storing　up　all　these　impressions　for　an　ultimate　judgment；　and　one　understands；　too；　a　certain　relief　that　mingled　with　his　undeniable　emotion　when　at　last　the　time　came　for　young　Benham；　〃the　one　living　purpose〃　of　his　life；　to　be　off　to　Minchinghampton　and　the　next　step　in　the　mysterious　ascent　of　the　English　educational　system。　Three　times　at　least；　and　with　an　increased　interval；　the　father　wrote　fine　fatherly　letters　that　would　have　stood　the　test　of　publication。　　Then　his　communications　became　comparatively　hurried　and　matter…of…fact。　　His　boy's　return　home　for　the　holidays　was　always　rather　a　stirring　time　for　his　private　feelings；　but　he　became　more　and　more　inexpressive。　　He　would　sometimes　lay　a　hand　on　those　growing　shoulders　and　then　withdraw　it。　　They　felt　braced…up　shoulders；　stiffly　inflexible　orthey　would　wince。　　And　when　one　has　let　the　habit　of　indefinite　feelings　grow　upon　one；　what　is　there　left　to　say？　　If　one　did　say　anything　one　might　be　asked　questions。　。　。　。　One　or　two　of　the　long　vacations　they　spent　abroad　together。　　The　last　of　these　occasions　followed　Benham's　convalescence　at　Montana　and　his　struggle　with　the　Bisse；　the　two　went　to　Zermatt　and　did　several　peaks　and　crossed　the　Theodule；　and　it　was　clear　that　their　joint　expeditions　were　a　strain　upon　both　of　them。　　The　father　thought　the　son　reckless；　unskilful；　and　impatient；　the　son　found　the　father's　insistence　upon　guides；　ropes；　precautions；　the　recognized　way；　the　highest　point　and　back　again　before　you　get　a　chill；　and　talk　about　it　sagely　but　very；　very　modestly　over　pipes；　tiresome。　　He　wanted　to　wander　in　deserts　of　ice　and　see　over　the　mountains；　and　discover　what　it　is　to　be　benighted　on　a　precipice。　And　gradually　he　was　becoming　familiar　with　his　father's　repertory　of　Greek　quotations。　　There　was　no　breach　between　them；　but　each　knew　that　holiday　was　the　last　they　would　ever　spend　together。　。　。　。　The　court　had　given　the　custody　of　young　William　Porphyry　into　his　father's　hands；　but　by　a　generous　concession　it　was　arranged　that　his　mother　should　have　him　to　see　her　for　an　hour　or　so　five　times　a　year。　　The　Nolan　legacy；　however；　coming　upon　the　top　of　this；　introduced　a　peculiar　complication　that　provided　much　work　for　tactful　intermediaries；　and　gave　great　and　increasing　scope　for　painful　delicacies　on　the　part　of　Mr。　Benham　as　the　boy　grew　up。　〃I　see；〃　said　the　father　over　his　study　pipe　and　with　his　glasses　fixed　on　remote　distances　above　the　head　of　the　current　sympathizer；　〃I　see　more　and　more　clearly　that　the　tale　of　my　sacrifices　is　not　yet　at　an　end。　。　。　。　　In　many　respects　he　is　like　her。　。　。　。　　Quick。　Too　quick。　。　。　。　　He　must　choose。　　But　I　know　his　choice。　　Yes；　yes；I'm　not　blind。　　She's　worked　upon　him。　。　。　。　　I　have　done　what　I　could　to　bring　out　the　manhood　in　him。　　Perhaps　it　will　bear　the　strain。　。　。　。　　It　will　be　a　wrench；　old　manGod　knows。〃　He　did　his　very　best　to　make　it　a　wrench。

2

Benham's　mother；　whom　he　saw　quarterly　and　also　on　the　first　of　May；　because　it　was　her　birthday；　touched　and　coloured　his　imagination　far　more　than　his　father　did。　　She　was　now　Lady　Marayne；　and　a　prominent；　successful；　and　happy　little　lady。　　Her　dereliction　had　been　forgiven　quite　soon；　and　whatever　whisper　of　it　remained　was　very　completely　forgotten　during　the　brief　period　of　moral　kindliness　which　followed　the　accession　of　King　Edward　the　Seventh。　It　no　doubt　contributed　to　her　social　reinstatement　that　her　former　husband　was　entirely　devoid　of　social　importance；　while；　on　the　other　hand；　Sir　Godfrey　Marayne's　temporary　monopoly　of　the　caecal　operation　which　became　so　fashionable　in　the　last　decade　of　Queen　Victoria's　reign　as　to　be　practically　epidemic；　created　a　strong　feeling　in　her　favour。　She　was　blue…eyed　and　very　delicately　complexioned；　quick…moving；　witty；　given　to　little　storms　of　clean　enthusiasm；　she　loved　handsome　things；　brave　things；　successful　things；　and　the　respect　and　affection　of　all　the　world。　　She　did　quite　what　she　liked　upon　impulse；　and　nobody　ever　thought　ill　of　her。　Her　family　were　the　Mantons　of　Blent；　quite　good　west…country　people。　　She　had　broken　away　from　them　before　she　was　twenty　to　marry　Benham；　whom　she　had　idealized　at　a　tennis　party。　　He　had　talked　of　his　work　and　she　had　seen　it　in　a　flash；　the　noblest　work　in　the　world；　him　at　his　daily　divine　toil　and　herself　a　Madonna　surrounded　by　a　troupe　of　Blessed　Boysall　of　good　family；　some　of　quite　the　best。　　For　a　time　she　had　kept　it　up　even　more　than　he　had；　and　then　Nolan　had　distracted　her　with　a　realization　of　the　heroism　that　goes　to　the　ends　of　the　earth。　　She　became　sick　with　desire　for　the　forests　of　Brazil；　and　the　Pacific；　anda　peak　in　Darien。　　Immediately　the　school　was　frowsty　beyond　endurance；　and　for　the　first　time　she　let　herself　perceive　how　dreadfully　a　gentleman　and　a　scholar　can　smell　of　pipes　and　tobacco。　　Only　one　course　lay　open　to　a　woman　of　spirit。　。　。　。　For　a　year　she　did　indeed　live　like　a　woman　of　spirit；　and　it　was　at　Nolan's　bedside　that　Marayne　was　first　moved　to　admiration。　　She　was　plucky。　　All　men　love　a　plucky　woman。　Sir　Godfrey　Marayne　smelt　a　good　deal　of　antiseptic　soap；　but　he　talked　in　a　way　that　amused　her；　and　he　trusted　as　well　as　adored　her。　　She　did　what　she　liked　with　his　money；　her　own　money；　and　her　son's　trust　money；　and　she　did　very　well。　　From　the　earliest　Benham's　visits　were　to　a　gracious　presence　amidst　wealthy　surroundings。　　The　transit　from　the　moral　blamelessness　of　Seagate　had　an　entirely　misleading　effect　of　ascent。　Their　earlier　encounters　became　rather　misty　in　his　memory；　they　occurred　at　various　hotels　in　Seagate。　　Afterwards　he　would　go；　first　taken　by　a　governess；　and　later　going　alone；　to　Charing　Cross；　where　he　would　be　met；　in　earlier　times　by　a　maid　and　afterwards　by　a　deferential　manservant　who　called　him　〃Sir；〃　and　conveyed；　sometimes　in　a　hansom　cab　and　later　in　a　smart　brougham；　by　Trafalgar　Square；　Lower　Regent　Street；　Piccadilly；　and　streets　of　increasing　wealth　and　sublimity　to　Sir　Godfrey's　house　in　Desborough　Street。　　Very　naturally　he　fell　into　thinking　of　these　discreet　and　well…governed　West　End　streets　as　a　part　of　his　mother's　atmosphere。　The　house　had　a　dignified　portico；　and　always　before　he　had　got　down　to　the　pavement　the　door　opened　agreeably　and　a　second　respectful　manservant　stood　ready。　　Then　came　the　large　hall；　with　its　noiseless　carpets　and　great　Chinese　jars；　its　lacquered　cabinets　and　the　wide　staircase；　and　floating　down　the　wide　staircase；　impatient　to　greet　him；　light　and　shining　as　a　flower　petal；　sweet　and　welcoming；　radiating　a　joyfulness　as　cool　and　clear　as　a　dewy　morning；　came　his　mother。　　〃WELL；　little　man；　my　son；〃　she　would　cry　in　her　happy　singing　voice；　〃WELL？〃　So　he　thought　she　must　always　be；　but　indeed　these　meetings　meant　very　much