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第58章

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exclaiming and conjecturing with youthful ardour。  〃My dear;



you give yourself a great deal of needless trouble;〃



said her mother at last; 〃depend upon it; it is something



not at all worth understanding。〃







     〃I can allow for his wishing Catherine away;



when he recollected this engagement;〃 said Sarah;



〃but why not do it civilly?〃







     〃I am sorry for the young people;〃 returned Mrs。 Morland;



〃they must have a sad time of it; but as for anything else;



it is no matter now; Catherine is safe at home;



and our comfort does not depend upon General Tilney。〃



Catherine sighed。  〃Well;〃 continued her philosophic mother;



〃I am glad I did not know of your journey at the time;



but now it is an over; perhaps there is no great harm done。 



It is always good for young people to be put upon



exerting themselves; and you know; my dear Catherine;



you always were a sad little shatter…brained creature;



but now you must have been forced to have your wits about you;



with so much changing of chaises and so forth; and I hope



it will appear that you have not left anything behind you



in any of the pockets。〃







     Catherine hoped so too; and tried to feel an interest



in her own amendment; but her spirits were quite worn down;



and; to be silent and alone becoming soon her only wish;



she readily agreed to her mother's next counsel of going early



to bed。  Her parents; seeing nothing in her ill looks and



agitation but the natural consequence of mortified feelings;



and of the unusual exertion and fatigue of such a journey;



parted from her without any doubt of their being soon



slept away; and though; when they all met the next morning;



her recovery was not equal to their hopes; they were still



perfectly unsuspicious of there being any deeper evil。 



They never once thought of her heart; which; for the



parents of a young lady of seventeen; just returned



from her first excursion from home; was odd enough!







     As soon as breakfast was over; she sat down to fulfil



her promise to Miss Tilney; whose trust in the effect



of time and distance on her friend's disposition was



already justified; for already did Catherine reproach



herself with having parted from Eleanor coldly; with having



never enough valued her merits or kindness; and never



enough commiserated her for what she had been yesterday



left to endure。  The strength of these feelings; however;



was far from assisting her pen; and never had it been



harder for her to write than in addressing Eleanor Tilney。 



To compose a letter which might at once do justice



to her sentiments and her situation; convey gratitude



without servile regret; be guarded without coldness;



and honest without resentmenta letter which Eleanor



might not be pained by the perusal ofand; above all;



which she might not blush herself; if Henry should chance



to see; was an undertaking to frighten away all her powers



of performance; and; after long thought and much perplexity;



to be very brief was all that she could determine on with any



confidence of safety。  The money therefore which Eleanor had



advanced was enclosed with little more than grateful thanks;



and the thousand good wishes of a most affectionate heart。 







     〃This has been a strange acquaintance;〃



observed Mrs。 Morland; as the letter was finished;



〃soon made and soon ended。  I am sorry it happens so;



for Mrs。 Allen thought them very pretty kind of young people;



and you were sadly out of luck too in your Isabella。 



Ah! Poor James! Well; we must live and learn; and the next



new friends you make I hope will be better worth keeping。〃







     Catherine coloured as she warmly answered; 〃No friend



can be better worth keeping than Eleanor。〃







     〃If so; my dear; I dare say you will meet again some



time or other; do not be uneasy。  It is ten to one but you



are thrown together again in the course of a few years;



and then what a pleasure it will be!〃







     Mrs。 Morland was not happy in her attempt at consolation。 



The hope of meeting again in the course of a few years



could only put into Catherine's head what might happen



within that time to make a meeting dreadful to her。 



She could never forget Henry Tilney; or think of him with



less tenderness than she did at that moment; but he might



forget her; and in that case; to meet! Her eyes filled



with tears as she pictured her acquaintance so renewed;



and her mother; perceiving her comfortable suggestions



to have had no good effect; proposed; as another expedient



for restoring her spirits; that they should call on



Mrs。 Allen。 







     The two houses were only a quarter of a mile apart;



and; as they walked; Mrs。 Morland quickly dispatched all



that she felt on the score of James's disappointment。 



〃We are sorry for him;〃 said she; 〃but otherwise there



is no harm done in the match going off; for it could not



be a desirable thing to have him engaged to a girl whom



we had not the smallest acquaintance with; and who was so



entirely without fortune; and now; after such behaviour;



we cannot think at all well of her。  Just at present it



comes hard to poor James; but that will not last forever;



and I dare say he will be a discreeter man all his life;



for the foolishness of his first choice。〃







     This was just such a summary view of the affair



as Catherine could listen to; another sentence might have



endangered her complaisance; and made her reply less rational;



for soon were all her thinking powers swallowed up in



the reflection of her own change of feelings and spirits



since last she had trodden that well…known road。  It was



not three months ago since; wild with joyful expectation;



she had there run backwards and forwards some ten times



a day; with an heart light; gay; and independent;



looking forward to pleasures untasted and unalloyed;



and free from the apprehension of evil as from the knowledge



of it。  Three months ago had seen her all this; and now;



how altered a being did she return!







     She was received by the Allens with all the kindness



which her unlooked…for appearance; acting on a steady affection;



would naturally call forth; and great was their surprise;



and warm their displeasure; on hearing how she had been



treatedthough Mrs。 Morland's account of it was no



inflated representation; no studied appeal to their passions。 



〃Catherine took us quite by surprise yesterday evening;〃



said she。  〃She travelled all the way post by herself; and knew



nothing of coming till Saturday night; for General Tilney;



from some odd fancy or other; all of a sudden grew tired



of having her there; and almost turned her out of the house。 



Very unfriendly; certainly; and he must be a very odd man;



but we are so glad to have her amongst us again! And



it is a great comfort to find that she is not a poor



helpless creature; but can shift very well for herself。〃







     Mr。 Allen expressed himself on the occasion with the



reasonable resentment of a sensible friend; and Mrs。 Allen



thought his expressions quite good enough to be immediately



made use of again by herself。  His wonder; his conjectures;



and his explanations became in succession hers; with the



addition of this single remark〃I really have not patience



with the general〃to fill up every accidental pause。 



And; 〃I really have not patience with the general;〃



was uttered twice after Mr。 Allen left the room;



without any relaxation of anger; or any 

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