resurrection(复活)-第79章
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They have nearly killed my little girl。 You have saved us；〃 she
said； catching hold of Nekhludoff's hand and trying to kiss it。
〃I went to see you yesterday。 My sister asked me to。 She is here。
This way； this way； please；〃 said Shoustova's mother； as she led
the way through a narrow door； and a dark passage； arranging her
hair and pulling at her tucked…up skirt。 〃My sister's name is
Kornilova。 You must have heard of her；〃 she added； stopping
before a closed door。 〃She was mixed up in a political affair。
An extremely clever woman！〃
Shoustova's mother opened the door and showed Nekhludoff into a
little room where on a sofa with a table before it sat a plump；
short girl with fair hair that curled round her pale； round face；
which was very like her mother's。 She had a striped cotton blouse
on。
Opposite her； in an armchair； leaning forward； so that he was
nearly bent double； sat a young fellow with a slight； black beard
and moustaches。
〃Lydia； Prince Nekhludoff！〃 he said。
The pale girl jumped up； nervously pushing back a lock of hair
behind her ear； and gazing at the newcomer with a frightened look
in her large； grey eyes。
〃So you are that dangerous woman whom Vera Doukhova wished me to
intercede for？〃 Nekhludoff asked； with a smile。
〃Yes； I am；〃 said Lydia Shoustova； her broad； kind； child…like
smile disclosing a row of beautiful teeth。 〃It was aunt who was
so anxious to see you。 Aunt！〃 she called out； in a pleasant；
tender voice through a door。
〃Your imprisonment grieved Vera Doukhova very much；〃 said
Nekhludoff。
〃Take a seat here； or better here；〃 said Shoustova； pointing to
the battered easy…chair from which the young man had just risen。
〃My cousin； Zakharov；〃 she said； noticing that Nekhludoff looked
at the young man。
The young man greeted the visitor with a smile as kindly as
Shoustova's； and when Nekhludoff sat down he brought himself
another chair； and sat by his side。 A fair…haired schoolboy of
about 10 also came into the room and silently sat down on the
window…sill。
〃Vera Doukhova is a great friend of my aunt's； but I hardly know
her；〃 said Shoustova。
Then a woman with a very pleasant face； with a white blouse and
leather belt； came in from the next room。
〃How do you do？ Thanks for coming；〃 she began as soon as she had
taken the place next Shoustova's on the sofa。
〃Well； and how is Vera。 You have seen her？ How does she bear her
fate？〃
〃She does not complain；〃 said Nekhludoff。 〃She says she feels
perfectly happy。〃'
〃Ah； that's like Vera。 I know her；〃 said the aunt； smiling and
shaking her head。 〃One must know her。 She has a fine character。
Everything for others； nothing for herself。〃
〃No； she asked nothing for herself； but only seemed concerned
about your niece。 What seemed to trouble her most was； as she
said； that your niece was imprisoned for nothing。〃
〃Yes； that's true；〃 said the aunt。 〃It is a dreadful business。
She suffered； in reality； because of me。〃
〃Not at all； aunt。 I should have taken the papers without you all
the same。'
〃Allow me to know better；〃 said the aunt。 〃You see；〃 she went on
to Nekhludoff； 〃it all happened because a certain person asked me
to keep his papers for a time； and I； having no house at the
time； brought them to her。 And that very night the police
searched her room and took her and the papers； and have kept her
up to now； demanding that she should say from whom she had them。〃
〃But I never told them；〃 said Shoustova quickly； pulling
nervously at a lock that was not even out of place
〃I never said you did〃 answered the aunt。
〃If they took Mitin up it was certainly not through me；〃 said
Shoustova； blushing； and looking round uneasily。
〃Don't speak about it； Lydia dear；〃 said her mother。
〃Why not？ I should like to relate it；〃 said Shoustova； no longer
smiling nor pulling her lock； but twisting it round her finger
and getting redder。
〃Don't forget what happened yesterday when you began talking
about it。〃
〃Not at all…Leave me alone； mamma。 I did not tell； I only kept
quiet。 When he examined me about Mitin and about aunt； I said
nothing； and told him I would not answer。〃
〃Then thisPetrov〃
〃Petrov is a spy； a gendarme； and a blackguard；〃 put in the aunt；
to explain her niece's words to Nekhludoff。
〃Then he began persuading；〃 continued Shoustova； excitedly and
hurriedly。 〃'Anything you tell me；' he said； 'can harm no one； on
the contrary； if you tell me； we may be able to set free innocent
people whom we may be uselessly tormenting。' Well； I still said I
would not tell。 Then he said； 'All right； don't tell； but do not
deny what I am going to say。' And he named Mitin。〃
〃Don't talk about it；〃 said the aunt。
〃Oh； aunt； don't interrupt；〃 and she went on pulling the lock of
hair and looking round。 〃And then； only fancy； the next day I
hearthey let me know by knocking at the wallthat Mitin is
arrested。 Well； I think I have betrayed him； and this tormented
me soit tormented me so that I nearly went mad。〃
〃And it turned out that it was not at all because of you he was
taken up？〃
〃Yes； but I didn't know。 I think； 'There； now； I have betrayed
him。' I walk and walk up and down from wall to wall； and cannot
help thinking。 I think； 'I have betrayed him。' I lie down and
cover myself up； and hear something whispering； 'Betrayed！
betrayed Mitin！ Mitin betrayed！' I know it is an hallucination；
but cannot help listening。 I wish to fall asleep； I cannot。 I
wish not to think； and cannot cease。 That is terrible！〃 and as
Shoustova spoke she got more and more excited； and twisted and
untwisted the lock of hair round her finger。
〃Lydia； dear； be calm；〃 the mother said； touching her shoulder。
But Shoustova could not stop herself。
〃It is all the more terrible〃 she began again； but did not
finish。 and jumping up with a cry rushed out of the room
Her mother turned to follow her。
〃They ought to be hanged； the rascals！〃 said the schoolboy who
was sitting on the window…sill。
〃What's that？〃 said the mother。
〃I only saidOh； it's nothing；〃 the schoolboy answered； and
taking a cigarette that lay on the table； he began to smoke。
CHAPTER XXVI。
LYDIA'S AUNT。
〃Yes； that solitary confinement is terrible for the young；〃 said
the aunt； shaking her head and also lighting a cigarette。
〃I should say for every one；〃 Nekhludoff replied。
〃No； not for all；〃 answered the aunt。 〃For the real
revolutionists； I have been told； it is rest and quiet。 A man who
is wanted by the police lives in continual anxiety； material
want； and fear for himself and others； and for his cause； and at
last； when he is taken up and it is all over； and all
responsibility is off his shoulders； he can sit and rest。 I have
been told they actually feel joyful when taken up。 But the young
and innocent （they always first arrest the innocent； like Lydia）；
for them the first shock is terrible。 It is not that they deprive
you of freedom； and the bad food and bad airall that is
nothing。 Three times as many privations would be easily borne if
it were not for the moral shock when one is first taken。〃
〃Have you experienced it？〃
〃I？ I was twice in prison；〃 she answered； with a sad； gentle
smile。 〃When I was arrested for the first time I had done
nothing。 I was 22； had a child； and was expecting another。 Though
the loss of freedom and the parting with my child and husband
were hard； they were nothing when compared with what I felt when
I found out that I had ceased being a human creature and had
become a thing。 I wished to say good…bye to my little daughter。 I
was told to go and get into the trap。 I asked where I was being
taken to。 The answer was that I should know when I got there。 I
asked what I was accused of； but got no reply。 After I had been
examined； and after they had undressed me and put numbered prison
clothes on me； they led me to a vault； opened a door； pushed me
in； and left me alone； a sentinel； with a loaded gun； paced up
and down in front of my door； and every now and then looked in
through a crackI felt terribly depressed。 What struck me most
at the time was that the gendarme officer who examined me offered
me a cigarette。 So he knew
