resurrection(复活)-第11章

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member　with　the　kindly　eyes　was　that　the　member；　having　felt　a
slight　stomach　derangement；　wished　to　do　a　little　massage　and　to
take　some　drops。　And　this　was　why　an　interval　was　made。

When　the　judges　had　risen；　the　advocates；　the　jury；　and　the
witnesses　also　rose；　with　the　pleasant　feeling　that　part　of　the
business　was　finished；　and　began　moving　in　different　directions。

Nekhludoff　went　into　the　jury's　room；　and　sat　down　by　the　window。


CHAPTER　XII。

TWELVE　YEARS　BEFORE。

〃Yes；　this　was　Katusha。〃

The　relations　between　Nekhludoff　and　Katusha　had　been　the
following：

Nekhludoff　first　saw　Katusha　when　he　was　a　student　in　his　third
year　at　the　University；　and　was　preparing　an　essay　on　land　tenure
during　the　summer　vacation；　which　he　passed　with　his　aunts。　Until
then　he　had　always　lived；　in　summer；　with　his　mother　and　sister
on　his　mother's　large　estate　near　Moscow。　But　that　year　his
sister　had　married；　and　his　mother　had　gone　abroad　to　a
watering…place；　and　he；　having　his　essay　to　write；　resolved　to
spend　the　summer　with　his　aunts。　It　was　very　quiet　in　their
secluded　estate　and　there　was　nothing　to　distract　his　mind；　his
aunts　loved　their　nephew　and　heir　very　tenderly；　and　he；　too；　was
fond　of　them　and　of　their　simple；　old…fashioned　life。

During　that　summer　on　his　aunts'　estate；　Nekhludoff　passed
through　that　blissful　state　of　existence　when　a　young　man　for　the
first　time；　without　guidance　from　any　one　outside；　realises　all
the　beauty　and　significance　of　life；　and　the　importance　of　the
task　allotted　in　it　to　man；　when　he　grasps　the　possibility　of
unlimited　advance　towards　perfection　for　one's　self　and　for　all
the　world；　and　gives　himself　to　this　task；　not　only　hopefully；
but　with　full　conviction　of　attaining　to　the　perfection　he
imagines。　In　that　year；　while　still　at　the　University；　he　had
read　Spencer's　Social　Statics；　and　Spencer's　views　on　landholding
especially　impressed　him；　as　he　himself　was　heir　to　large
estates。　His　father　had　not　been　rich；　but　his　mother　had
received　10；000　acres　of　land　for　her　dowry。　At　that　time　he
fully　realised　all　the　cruelty　and　injustice　of　private　property
in　land；　and　being　one　of　those　to　whom　a　sacrifice　to　the
demands　of　conscience　gives　the　highest　spiritual　enjoyment；　he
decided　not　to　retain　property　rights；　but　to　give　up　to　the
peasant　labourers　the　land　he　had　inherited　from　his　father。　It
was　on　this　land　question　he　wrote　his　essay。

He　arranged　his　life　on　his　aunts'　estate　in　the　following
manner。　He　got　up　very　early；　sometimes　at　three　o'clock；　and
before　sunrise　went　through　the　morning　mists　to　bathe　in　the
river；　under　the　hill。　He　returned　while　the　dew　still　lay　on　the
grass　and　the　flowers。　Sometimes；　having　finished　his　coffee；　he
sat　down　with　his　books　of　reference　and　his　papers　to　write　his
essay；　but　very　often；　instead　of　reading　or　writing；　he　left
home　again；　and　wandered　through　the　fields　and　the　woods。　Before
dinner　he　lay　down　and　slept　somewhere　in　the　garden。　At　dinner
he　amused　and　entertained　his　aunts　with　his　bright　spirits；　then
he　rode　on　horseback　or　went　for　a　row　on　the　river；　and　in　the
evening　he　again　worked　at　his　essay；　or　sat　reading　or　playing
patience　with　his　aunts。

His　joy　in　life　was　so　great　that　it　agitated　him；　and　kept　him
awake　many　a　night；　especially　when　it　was　moonlight；　so　that
instead　of　sleeping　he　wandered　about　in　the　garden　till　dawn；
alone　with　his　dreams　and　fancies。

And　so；　peacefully　and　happily；　he　lived　through　the　first　month
of　his　stay　with　his　aunts；　taking　no　particular　notice　of　their
half…ward；　half…servant；　the　black…eyed；　quick…footed　Katusha。
Then；　at　the　age　of　nineteen；　Nekhludoff；　brought　up　under　his
mother's　wing；　was　still　quite　pure。　If　a　woman　figured　in　his
dreams　at　all　it　was　only　as　a　wife。　All　the　other　women；　who；
according　to　his　ideas　he　could　not　marry；　were　not　women　for
him；　but　human　beings。

But　on　Ascension　Day　that　summer；　a　neighbour　of　his　aunts'；　and
her　family；　consisting　of　two　young　daughters；　a　schoolboy；　and　a
young　artist　of　peasant　origin　who　was　staying　with　them；　came　to
spend　the　day。　After　tea　they　all　went　to　play　in　the　meadow　in
front　of　the　house；　where　the　grass　had　already　been　mown。　They
played　at　the　game　of　gorelki；　and　Katusha　joined　them。　Running
about　and　changing　partners　several　times；　Nekhludoff　caught
Katusha；　and　she　became　his　partner。　Up　to　this　time　he　had　liked
Katusha's　looks；　but　the　possibility　of　any　nearer　relations　with
her　had　never　entered　his　mind。

〃Impossible　to　catch　those　two；〃　said　the　merry　young　artist；
whose　turn　it　was　to　catch；　and　who　could　run　very　fast　with　his
short；　muscular　legs。

〃You！　And　not　catch　us？〃　said　Katusha。

〃One；　two；　three；〃　and　the　artist　clapped　his　hands。　Katusha；
hardly　restraining　her　laughter；　changed　places　with　Nekhludoff；
behind　the　artist's　back；　and　pressing　his　large　hand　with　her
little　rough　one；　and　rustling　with　her　starched　petticoat；　ran
to　the　left。　Nekhludoff　ran　fast　to　the　right；　trying　to　escape
from　the　artist；　but　when　he　looked　round　he　saw　the　artist
running　after　Katusha；　who　kept　well　ahead；　her　firm　young　legs
moving　rapidly。　There　was　a　lilac　bush　in　front　of　them；　and
Katusha　made　a　sign　with　her　head　to　Nekhludoff　to　join　her
behind　it；　for　if　they　once　clasped　hands　again　they　were　safe
from　their　pursuer；　that　being　a　rule　of　the　game。　He　understood
the　sign；　and　ran　behind　the　bush；　but　he　did　not　know　that　there
was　a　small　ditch　overgrown　with　nettles　there。　He　stumbled　and
fell　into　the　nettles；　already　wet　with　dew；　stinging　his　bands；
but　rose　immediately；　laughing　at　his　mishap。

Katusha；　with　her　eyes　black　as　sloes；　her　face　radiant　with　joy；
was　flying　towards　him；　and　they　caught　hold　of　each　other's
hands。

〃Got　stung；　I　daresay？〃　she　said；　arranging　her　hair　with　her
free　hand；　breathing　fast　and　looking　straight　up　at　him　with　a
glad；　pleasant　smile。

〃I　did　not　know　there　was　a　ditch　here；〃　he　answered；　smiling
also；　and　keeping　her　hand　in　his。　She　drew　nearer　to　him；　and　he
himself；　not　knowing　how　it　happened；　stooped　towards　her。　She
did　not　move　away；　and　he　pressed　her　hand　tight　and　kissed　her
on　the　lips。

〃There！　You've　done　it！〃　she　said；　and；　freeing　her　hand　with　a
swift　movement；　ran　away　from　him。　Then；　breaking　two　branches　of
white　lilac　from　which　the　blossoms　were　already　falling；　she
began　fanning　her　hot　face　with　them；　then；　with　her　head　turned
back　to　him；　she　walked　away；　swaying　her　arms　briskly　in　front
of　her；　and　joined　the　other　players。

After　this　there　grew　up　between　Nekhludoff　and　Katusha　those
peculiar　relations　which　often　exist　between　a　pure　young　man　and
girl　who　are　attracted　to　each　other。

When　Katusha　came　into　the　room；　or　even　when　he　saw　her　white
apron　from　afar；　everything　brightened　up　in　Nekhludoff's　eyes；
as　when　the　sun　appears　everything　becomes　more　interesting；　more
joyful；　more　important。　The　whole　of　life　seemed　full　of
gladness。　And　she　felt　the　same。　But　it　was　not　only　Katusha's
presence　that　had　this　effect　on　Nekhludoff。　The　mere　thought
that　Katusha　existed　（and　for　her　that　Nekhludoff　existed）　had
this　effect。

When　he　received　an　unpleasant　letter　from　his　mother；　or　could
not　get　on　with　his　essay；　or　felt　the　unreasoning　sadness　that
young　people　are　often　subject　to；　he　had　only　to　remember
Katusha　and　that　he　should　see　her；　and　it　all　vanished。　Katusha
had　much　work　to　do　in　the　house；　but　she　managed　to　get　a　little
leisure　for　reading；　and　Nekhludoff　gave　her　Dostoievsky　and
Tourgeneff　（whom　he　had　just　read　himself）　to　read。　She　liked
Tourgeneff's　Lull　best。　They　had　talks　at　moments　snatched　when
meeting　in　the　passage；　on　the　veranda；　or　the　yard；　and
sometimes　in　the　room　of　his　aunts'　old　servant；　Matrona
Pavlovna；　with　whom　he　sometimes　used　to　drink　tea；　and　where
Katusha　used　to　work。

These　talks　in　Matrona　Pavlovna's　presence　were　the　pleasantest。
When　they　were　alone　it　was　worse。　Their　eyes　at　once　began　to
say　something　very　different　and　far　more　important　than　what
their　mouths　uttered。　Their　lips　puckered；　and　they　felt