beasts and superbeasts-第12章

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〃On　state　occasions　I　always　wear　a　black　ribbon　in　

my　hair；〃　said　Vera　with　crushing　dignity。



Latimer　Springfield　was　a　rather　cheerless；　oldish　

young　man；　who　went　into　politics　somewhat　in　the　spirit　

in　which　other　people　might　go　into　half…mourning。　　

Without　being　an　enthusiast；　however；　he　was　a　fairly　

strenuous　plodder；　and　Mrs。　Durmot　had　been　reasonably　

near　the　mark　in　asserting　that　he　was　working　at　high　

pressure　over　this　election。　　The　restful　lull　which　his　

hostess　enforced　on　him　was　decidedly　welcome；　and　yet　

the　nervous　excitement　of　the　contest　had　too　great　a　

hold　on　him　to　be　totally　banished。



〃I　know　he's　going　to　sit　up　half　the　night　working　

up　points　for　his　final　speeches；〃　said　Mrs。　Durmot　

regretfully；　〃however；　we've　kept　politics　at　arm's　

length　all　the　afternoon　and　evening。　　More　than　that　we　

cannot　do。〃



〃That　remains　to　be　seen；〃　said　Vera；　but　she　said　

it　to　herself。



Latimer　had　scarcely　shut　his　bedroom　door　before　he　

was　immersed　in　a　sheaf　of　notes　and　pamphlets；　while　a　

fountain…pen　and　pocket…book　were　brought　into　play　for　

the　due　marshalling　of　useful　facts　and　discreet　

fictions。　　He　had　been　at　work　for　perhaps　thirty…five　

minutes；　and　the　house　was　seemingly　consecrated　to　the　

healthy　slumber　of　country　life；　when　a　stifled　squealing　

and　scuffling　in　the　passage　was　followed　by　a　loud　tap　

at　his　door。　　Before　he　had　time　to　answer；　a　much…

encumbered　Vera　burst　into　the　room　with　the　question；　〃I　

say；　can　I　leave　these　here？〃



〃These〃　were　a　small　black　pig　and　a　lusty　specimen　

of　black…red　gamecock。



Latimer　was　moderately　fond　of　animals；　and　

particularly　interested　in　small　livestock　rearing　from　

the　economic　point　of　view；　in　fact；　one　of　the　pamphlets　

on　which　he　was　at　that　moment　engaged　warmly　advocated　

the　further　development　of　the　pig　and　poultry　industry　

in　our　rural　districts；　but　he　was　pardonably　unwilling　

to　share　even　a　commodious　bedroom　with　samples　of　

henroost　and　stye　products。



〃Wouldn't　they　be　happier　somewhere　outside？〃　he　

asked；　tactfully　expressing　his　own　preference　in　the　

matter　in　an　apparent　solicitude　for　theirs。



〃There　is　no　outside；〃　said　Vera　impressively；　

〃nothing　but　a　waste　of　dark；　swirling　waters。　　The　

reservoir　at　Brinkley　has　burst。〃



〃I　didn't　know　there　was　a　reservoir　at　Brinkley；〃　

said　Latimer。



〃Well；　there　isn't　now；　it's　jolly　well　all　over　the　

place；　and　as　we　stand　particularly　low　we're　the　centre　

of　an　inland　sea　just　at　present。　　You　see　the　river　has　

overflowed　its　banks　as　well。〃



〃Good　gracious！　　Have　any　lives　been　lost？〃



〃Heaps；　I　should　say。　　The　second　housemaid　has　

already　identified　three　bodies　that　have　floated　past　

the　billiard…room　window　as　being　the　young　man　she's　

engaged　to。　　Either　she's　engaged　to　a　large　assortment　

of　the　population　round　here　or　else　she's　very　careless　

at　identification。　　Of　course　it　may　be　the　same　body　

coming　round　again　and　again　in　a　swirl；　I　hadn't　thought　

of　that。〃



〃But　we　ought　to　go　out　and　do　rescue　work；　oughtn't　

we？〃　said　Latimer；　with　the　instinct　of　a　Parliamentary　

candidate　for　getting　into　the　local　limelight。



〃We　can't；〃　said　Vera　decidedly；　〃we　haven't　any　

boats　and　we're　cut　off　by　a　raging　torrent　from　any　

human　habitation。　　My　aunt　particularly　hoped　you　would　

keep　to　your　room　and　not　add　to　the　confusion；　but　she　

thought　it　would　be　so　kind　of　you　if　you　would　take　in　

Hartlepool's　Wonder；　the　gamecock；　you　know；　for　the　

night。　　You　see；　there　are　eight　other　gamecocks；　and　

they　fight　like　furies　if　they　get　together；　so　we're　

putting　one　in　each　bedroom。　　The　fowl…houses　are　all　

flooded　out；　you　know。　　And　then　I　thought　perhaps　you　

wouldn't　mind　taking　in　this　wee　piggie；　he's　rather　a　

little　love；　but　he　has　a　vile　temper。　　He　gets　that　from　

his　mother　…　not　that　I　like　to　say　things　against　her　

when　she's　lying　dead　and　drowned　in　her　stye；　poor　

thing。　　What　he　really　wants　is　a　man's　firm　hand　to　keep　

him　in　order。　　I'd　try　and　grapple　with　him　myself；　only　

I've　got　my　chow　in　my　room；　you　know；　and　he　goes　for　

pigs　wherever　he　finds　them。〃



〃Couldn't　the　pig　go　in　the　bathroom？〃　asked　Latimer　

faintly；　wishing　that　he　had　taken　up　as　determined　a　

stand　on　the　subject　of　bedroom　swine　as　the　chow　had。



〃The　bathroom？〃　Vera　laughed　shrilly。　　〃It'll　be　

full　of　Boy　Scouts　till　morning　if　the　hot　water　holds　

out。〃



〃Boy　Scouts？〃



〃Yes；　thirty　of　them　came　to　rescue　us　while　the　

water　was　only　waist…high；　then　it　rose　another　three　

feet　or　so　and　we　had　to　rescue　them。　　We're　giving　them　

hot　baths　in　batches　and　drying　their　clothes　in　the　hot…

air　cupboard；　but；　of　course；　drenched　clothes　don't　dry　

in　a　minute；　and　the　corridor　and　staircase　are　beginning　

to　look　like　a　bit　of　coast　scenery　by　Tuke。　　Two　of　the　

boys　are　wearing　your　Melton　overcoat；　I　hope　you　don't　

mind。〃



〃It's　a　new　overcoat；〃　said　Latimer；　with　every　

indication　of　minding　dreadfully。



〃You'll　take　every　care　of　Hartlepool's　Wonder；　

won't　you？〃　said　Vera。　　〃His　mother　took　three　firsts　at　

Birmingham；　and　he　was　second　in　the　cockerel　class　last　

year　at　Gloucester。　　He'll　probably　roost　on　the　rail　at　

the　bottom　of　your　bed。　　I　wonder　if　he'd　feel　more　at　

home　if　some　of　his　wives　were　up　here　with　him？　　The　

hens　are　all　in　the　pantry；　and　I　think　I　could　pick　out　

Hartlepool　Helen；　she's　his　favourite。〃



Latimer　showed　a　belated　firmness　on　the　subject　of　

Hartlepool　Helen；　and　Vera　withdrew　without　pressing　the　

point；　having　first　settled　the　gamecock　on　his　

extemporised　perch　and　taken　an　affectionate　farewell　of　

the　pigling。　　Latimer　undressed　and　got　into　bed　with　all　

due　speed；　judging　that　the　pig　would　abate　its　

inquisitorial　restlessness　once　the　light　was　turned　out。　　

As　a　substitute　for　a　cosy；　straw…bedded　sty　the　room　

offered；　at　first　inspection；　few　attractions；　but　the　

disconsolate　animal　suddenly　discovered　an　appliance　in　

which　the　most　luxuriously　contrived　piggeries　were　

notably　deficient。　　The　sharp　edge　of　the　underneath　part　

of　the　bed　was　pitched　at　exactly　the　right　elevation　to　

permit　the　pigling　to　scrape　himself　ecstatically　

backwards　and　forwards；　with　an　artistic　humping　of　the　

back　at　the　crucial　moment　and　an　accompanying　gurgle　of　

long…drawn　delight。　　The　gamecock；　who　may　have　fancied　

that　he　was　being　rocked　in　the　branches　of　a　pine…tree；　

bore　the　motion　with　greater　fortitude　than　Latimer　was　

able　to　command。　　A　series　of　slaps　directed　at　the　pig's　

body　were　accepted　more　as　an　additional　and　pleasing　

irritant　than　as　a　criticism　of　conduct　or　a　hint　to　

desist；　evidently　something　more　than　a　man's　firm　hand　

was　needed　to　deal　with　the　case。　　Latimer　slipped　out　of　

bed　in　search　of　a　weapon　of　dissuasion。　　There　was　

sufficient　light　in　the　room　to　enable　the　pig　to　detect　

this　manoeuvre；　and　the　vile　temper；　inherited　from　the　

drowned　mother；　found　full　play。　　Latimer　bounded　back　

into　bed；　and　his　conqueror；　after　a　few　threatening　

snorts　and　champings　of　its　jaws；　resumed　its　massage　

operations　with　renewed　zeal。　　During　the　long　wakeful　

hours　which　ensued　Latimer　tried　to　distract　his　mind　

from　his　own　immediate　troubles　by　dwelling　with　decent　

sympathy　on　the　second　housemaid's　bereavement；　but　he　

found　himself　more　often　wondering　how　many　Boy　Scouts　

were　sharing　his　Melton　overcoat。　　The　role　of　Saint　

Martin　malgre　lui　was　not　one　which　appealed　to　him。



Towards　dawn　the　pigling　fell　into　a　happy　slumber；　

and　Latimer　might　have　followed　its　example；　but　at　about　

the　same　time　Stupor　Hartlepooli　gave　a　rousing　crow；　

clattered　down　to　the　floor　and　forthwith　commenced　a　

spirited　combat　with　his　reflection　in　the　wardrobe　

mirror。