she stoops to conquer(屈身求爱)-第12章
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to set off her beauty？
TONY。 That's as thereafter may be。
MISS NEVILLE。 My dear aunt； if you knew how it would oblige
me。
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 A parcel of old…fashioned rose and table…cut
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things。 They would make you look like the court of King Solomon at a
puppet…show。 Besides； I believe； I can't readily come at them。 They
may be missing； for aught I know to the contrary。
TONY。 （Apart to MRS。 HARDCASTLE。） Then why don't you tell
her so at once； as she's so longing for them？ Tell her they're lost。 It's
the only way to quiet her。 Say they're lost； and call me to bear witness。
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 （Apart to TONY。） You know； my dear； I'm
only keeping them for you。 So if I say they're gone； you'll bear me
witness； will you？ He！ he！ he！
TONY。 Never fear me。 Ecod！ I'll say I saw them taken out with my
own eyes。
MISS NEVILLE。 I desire them but for a day； madam。 Just to be
permitted to show them as relics； and then they may be locked up again。
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 To be plain with you； my dear Constance； if
I could find them you should have them。 They're missing； I assure you。
Lost； for aught I know； but we must have patience wherever they are。
MISS NEVILLE。 I'll not believe it！ this is but a shallow pretence to
deny me。 I know they are too valuable to be so slightly kept； and as you
are to answer for the loss
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 Don't be alarmed； Constance。 If they be
lost； I must restore an equivalent。 But my son knows they are missing；
and not to be found。
TONY。 That I can bear witness to。 They are missing； and not to be
found； I'll take my oath on't。
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 You must learn resignation； my dear； for
though we lose our fortune； yet we should not lose our patience。 See me；
how calm I am。
MISS NEVILLE。 Ay； people are generally calm at the misfortunes of
others。
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 Now I wonder a girl of your good sense
should waste a thought upon such trumpery。 We shall soon find them；
and in the mean time you shall make use of my garnets till your jewels be
found。
MISS NEVILLE。 I detest garnets。
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MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 The most becoming things in the world to
set off a clear complexion。 You have often seen how well they look upon
me。 You SHALL have them。 ＇Exit。＇
MISS NEVILLE。 I dislike them of all things。 You shan't stir。Was
ever anything so provoking； to mislay my own jewels； and force me to
wear her trumpery？
TONY。 Don't be a fool。 If she gives you the garnets； take what you
can get。 The jewels are your own already。 I have stolen them out of her
bureau； and she does not know it。 Fly to your spark； he'll tell you more
of the matter。 Leave me to manage her。
MISS NEVILLE。 My dear cousin！
TONY。 Vanish。 She's here； and has missed them already。 ＇Exit
MISS NEVILLE。＇ Zounds！ how she fidgets and spits about like a
Catherine wheel。
Enter MRS。 HARDCASTLE。
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 Confusion！ thieves！ robbers！ we are
cheated； plundered； broke open； undone。
TONY。 What's the matter； what's the matter； mamma？ I hope
nothing has happened to any of the good family！
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 We are robbed。 My bureau has been
broken open； the jewels taken out； and I'm undone。
TONY。 Oh！ is that all？ Ha！ ha！ ha！ By the laws； I never saw it
acted better in my life。 Ecod； I thought you was ruined in earnest； ha！ ha！
ha！
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 Why； boy； I AM ruined in earnest。 My
bureau has been broken open； and all taken away。
TONY。 Stick to that： ha！ ha！ ha！ stick to that。 I'll bear witness； you
know； call me to bear witness。
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 I tell you； Tony； by all that's precious； the
jewels are gone； and I shall be ruined for ever。
TONY。 Sure I know they're gone； and I'm to say so。
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 My dearest Tony； but hear me。 They're
gone； I say。
TONY。 By the laws； mamma； you make me for to laugh； ha！ ha！ I
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know who took them well enough； ha！ ha！ ha！
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 Was there ever such a blockhead； that can't
tell the difference between jest and earnest？ I tell you I'm not in jest；
booby。
TONY。 That's right； that's right； you must be in a bitter passion； and
then nobody will suspect either of us。 I'll bear witness that they are gone。
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 Was there ever such a cross…grained brute；
that won't hear me？ Can you bear witness that you're no better than a
fool？ Was ever poor woman so beset with fools on one hand； and thieves
on the other？
TONY。 I can bear witness to that。
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 Bear witness again； you blockhead you； and
I'll turn you out of the room directly。 My poor niece； what will become
of her？ Do you laugh； you unfeeling brute； as if you enjoyed my
distress？
TONY。 I can bear witness to that。
MRS。 HARDCASTLE。 Do you insult me； monster？ I'll teach you
to vex your mother； I will。
TONY。 I can bear witness to that。 ＇He runs off； she follows him。＇
Enter Miss HARDCASTLE and Maid。
MISS HARDCASTLE。 What an unaccountable creature is that
brother of mine； to send them to the house as an inn！ ha！ ha！ I don't
wonder at his impudence。
MAID。 But what is more； madam； the young gentleman； as you
passed by in your present dress； asked me if you were the bar…maid。 He
mistook you for the bar…maid； madam。
MISS HARDCASTLE。 Did he？ Then as I live； I'm resolved to
keep up the delusion。 Tell me； Pimple； how do you like my present dress？
Don't you think I look something like Cherry in the Beaux Stratagem？
MAID。 It's the dress； madam； that every lady wears in the country；
but when she visits or receives company。
MISS HARDCASTLE。 And are you sure he does not remember my
face or person？
MAID。 Certain of it。
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MISS HARDCASTLE。 I vow； I thought so； for； though we spoke for
some time together； yet his fears were such； that he never once looked up
during the interview。 Indeed； if he had； my bonnet would have kept him
from seeing me。
MAID。 But what do you hope from keeping him in his mistake？
MISS HARDCASTLE。 In the first place I shall be seen； and that is
no small advantage to a girl who brings her face to market。 T
