the author of beltraffio-第5章

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Michael…Angelesque　attitudes　and　mystical　robes；　but　I'm　now
convinced　she　hadn't　in　her　nature　those　depths　of　unutterable
thought　which；　when　you　first　knew　her；　seemed　to　look　out　from　her
eyes　and　to　prompt　her　complicated　gestures。　　Those　features　in
especial　had　a　misleading　eloquence；　they　lingered　on　you　with　a　far…
off　dimness；　an　air　of　obstructed　sympathy；　which　was　certainly　not
always　a　key　to　the　spirit　of　their　owner；　so　that；　of　a　truth；　a
young　lady　could　scarce　have　been　so　dejected　and　disillusioned
without　having　committed　a　crime　for　which　she　was　consumed　with
remorse；　or　having　parted　with　a　hope　that　she　couldn't　sanely　have
entertained。　　She　had；　I　believe；　the　usual　allowance　of　rather　vain
motives：　　she　wished　to　be　looked　at；　she　wished　to　be　married；　she
wished　to　be　thought　original。

It　costs　me　a　pang　to　speak　in　this　irreverent　manner　of　one　of
Ambient's　name；　but　I　shall　have　still　less　gracious　things　to　say
before　I've　finished　my　anecdote；　and　moreoverI　confess　itI　owe
the　young　lady　a　bit　of　a　grudge。　　Putting　aside　the　curious　cast　of
her　face　she　had　no　natural　aptitude　for　an　artistic　development；　had
little　real　intelligence。　　But　her　affectations　rubbed　off　on　her
brother's　renown；　and　as　there　were　plenty　of　people　who　darkly
disapproved　of　him　they　could　easily　point　to　his　sister　as　a　person
formed　by　his　influence。　　It　was　quite　possible　to　regard　her　as　a
warning；　and　she　had　almost　compromised　him　with　the　world　at　large。
He　was　the　original　and　she　the　inevitable　imitation。　　I　suppose　him
scarce　aware　of　the　impression　she　mainly　produced；　beyond　having　a
general　idea　that　she　made　up　very　well　as　a　Rossetti；　he　was　used　to
her　and　was　sorry　for　her；　wishing　she　would　marry　and　observing　how
she　didn't。　　Doubtless　I　take　her　too　seriously；　for　she　did　me　no
harm；　though　I'm　bound　to　allow　that　I　can　only　half…account　for　her。
She　wasn't　so　mystical　as　she　looked；　but　was　a　strange　indirect
uncomfortable　embarrassing　woman。　　My　story　gives　the　reader　at　best
so　very　small　a　knot　to　untie　that　I　needn't　hope　to　excite　his
curiosity　by　delaying　to　remark　that　Mrs。　Ambient　hated　her　sister…
in…law。　　This　I　learned　but　later　on；　when　other　matters　came　to　my
knowledge。　　I　mention　it；　however；　at　once；　for　I　shall　perhaps　not
seem　to　count　too　much　on　having　beguiled　him　if　I　say　he　must
promptly　have　guessed　it。　　Mrs。　Ambient；　a　person　of　conscience；　put
the　best　face　on　her　kinswoman；　who　spent　a　month　with　her　twice　a
year；　but　it　took　no　great　insight　to　recognise　the　very　different
personal　paste　of　the　two　ladies；　and　that　the　usual　feminine
hypocrisies　would　cost　them　on　either　side　much　more　than　the　usual
effort。　　Mrs。　Ambient；　smooth…haired；　thin…lipped；　perpetually　fresh；
must　have　regarded　her　crumpled　and　dishevelled　visitor　as　an
equivocal　joke；　she　herself　so　the　opposite　of　a　Rossetti；　she
herself　a　Reynolds　or　a　Lawrence；　with　no　more　far…fetched　note　in
her　composition　than　a　cold　ladylike　candour　and　a　well…starched
muslin　dress。

It　was　in　a　garment　and　with　an　expression　of　this　kind　that　she　made
her　entrance　after　I　had　exchanged　a　few　words　with　Miss　Ambient。
Her　husband　presently　followed　her　and；　there　being　no　other　company；
we　went　to　dinner。　　The　impressions　I　received　at　that　repast　are
present　to　me　still。　　The　elements　of　oddity　in　the　air　hovered；　as
it　were；　without　descendingto　any　immediate　check　of　my　delight。
This　came　mainly；　of　course；　from　Ambient's　talk；　the　easiest　and
richest　I　had　ever　heard。　　I　mayn't　say　to…day　whether　he　laid
himself　out　to　dazzle　a　rather　juvenile　pilgrim　from　over　the　sea；
but　that　matters　littleit　seemed　so　natural　to　him　to　shine。　　His
spoken　wit　or　wisdom；　or　whatever；　had　thus　a　charm　almost　beyond　his
written；　that　is　if　the　high　finish　of　his　printed　prose　be　really；
as　some　people　have　maintained；　a　fault。　　There　was　such　a　kindness
in　him；　however；　that　I've　no　doubt　it　gave　him　ideas　for　me；　or
about　me；　to　see　me　sit　as　open…mouthed　as　I　now　figure　myself。　　Not
so　the　two　ladies；　who　not　only　were　very　nearly　dumb　from　beginning
to　end　of　the　meal；　but　who　hadn't　even　the　air　of　being　struck　with
such　an　exhibition　of　fancy　and　taste。　　Mrs。　Ambient；　detached；　and
inscrutable；　met　neither　my　eye　nor　her　husband's；　she　attended　to
her　dinner；　watched　her　servants；　arranged　the　puckers　in　her　dress；
exchanged　at　wide　intervals　a　remark　with　her　sister…in…law　and；
while　she　slowly　rubbed　her　lean　white　hands　between　the　courses；
looked　out　of　the　window　at　the　first　signs　of　eveningthe　long　June
day　allowing　us　to　dine　without　candles。　　Miss　Ambient　appeared　to
give　little　direct　heed　to　anything　said　by　her　brother；　but　on　the
other　hand　she　was　much　engaged　in　watching　its　effect　upon　me。　　Her
〃die…away〃　pupils　continued　to　attach　themselves　to　my　countenance；
and　it　was　only　her　air　of　belonging　to　another　century　that　kept
them　from　being　importunate。　　She　seemed　to　look　at　me　across　the
ages；　and　the　interval　of　time　diminished　for　me　the　inconvenience。
It　was　as　if　she　knew　in　a　general　way　that　he　must　be　talking　very
well；　but　she　herself　was　so　at　home　among　such　allusions　that　she
had　no　need　to　pick　them　up　and　was　at　liberty　to　see　what　would
become　of　the　exposure　of　a　candid　young　American　to　a　high　aesthetic
temperature。

The　temperature　was　aesthetic　certainly；　but　it　was　less　so　than　I
could　have　desired；　for　I　failed　of　any　great　success　in　making　our
friend　abound　about　himself。　　I　tried　to　put　him　on　the　ground　of　his
own　genius；　but　he　slipped　through　my　fingers　every　time　and　shifted
the　saddle　to　one　or　other　of　his　contemporaries。　　He　talked　about
Balzac　and　Browning；　about　what　was　being　done　in　foreign　countries；
about　his　recent　tour　in　the　East　and　the　extraordinary　forms　of　life
to　be　observed　in　that　part　of　the　world。　　I　felt　he　had　reasons　for
holding　off　from　a　direct　profession　of　literary　faith；　a　full
consistency　or　sincerity；　and　therefore　dealt　instead　with　certain
social　topics；　treating　them　with　extraordinary　humour　and　with　a　due
play　of　that　power　of　ironic　evocation　in　which　his　books　abound。　　He
had　a　deal　to　say　about　London　as　London　appears　to　the　observer　who
has　the　courage　of　some　of　his　conclusions　during　the　high…pressure
timefrom　April　to　Julyof　its　gregarious　life。　　He　flashed　his
faculty　of　playing　with　the　caught　image　and　liberating　the　wistful
idea　over　the　whole　scheme　of　manners　or　conception　of　intercourse　of
his　compatriots；　among　whom　there　were　evidently　not　a　few　types　for
which　he　had　little　love。　　London　in　short　was　grotesque　to　him；　and
he　made　capital　sport　of　it；　his　only　allusion　that　I　can　remember　to
his　own　work　was　his　saying　that　he　meant　some　day　to　do　an　immense
and　general；　a　kind　of　epic；　social　satire。　　Miss　Ambient's　perpetual
gaze　seemed　to　put　to　me：　　〃Do　you　perceive　how　artistic；　how　very
strange　and　interesting；　we　are？　　Frankly　now　is　it　possible　to　be
MORE　artistic；　MORE　strange　and　interesting；　than　this？　　You　surely
won't　deny　that　we're　remarkable。〃　　I　was　irritated　by　her　use　of　the
plural　pronoun；　for　she　had　no　right　to　pair　herself　with　her
brother；　and　moreover；　of　course；　I　couldn't　see　my　way　toat　all
geniallyinclude　Mrs。　Ambient。　　Yet　there　was　no　doubt　they　were；
taken　together；　unprecedented　enough；　and；　with　all　allowances；　I　had
never　been　left；　or　condemned；　to　draw　so　many　rich　inferences。

After　the　ladies　had　retired　my　host　took　me　into　his　study　to　smoke；
where　I　appealingly　brought　him　round；　or　so　tried；　to　some
disclosure　of　fond　ideals。　　I　was　bent　on　proving　I　was　worthy　to
listen　to　him；　on　repaying　him　for　what　he　had　said　to　me　before
dinner；　by　showing　him　how　perfectly　I　understood。　　He　liked　to　talk；
he　liked　to　defend　his　convictions　and　his　honour　（not　that　I
attacked　them）；　he　liked　a　little　perhapsit　was　a　pardonable
weaknessto　bewilder　the　youthful　mind　even　while　wishing　to　win　it
over。　　My　ingenuous　sympathy　received　at　any　rate　a　shock　from　three
or　four　of　his　professionshe　made　me　occasionally　gasp　and　stare。
He　couldn't　help　forgetting；　or　rather　couldn't　know；　ho