the author of beltraffio-第10章

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you　see　what　I　mean？I　don't　quite　see　where　I　shall　be　landed。　　I
only　want　to　be　quiet；　after　all；〃　Miss　Ambient　continued　as　if　she
had　long　been　baffled　of　this　modest　desire。　　〃And　one　must　be　good；
at　any　rate；　must　not　one？〃　she　pursued　with　a　dubious　quaveran
intimation　apparently　that　what　I　might　say　one　way　or　the　other
would　settle　it　for　her。　　It　was　difficult　for　me　to　be　very　original
in　reply；　and　I'm　afraid　I　repaid　her　confidence　with　an　unblushing
platitude。　　I　remember；　moreover；　attaching　to　it　an　inquiry；　equally
destitute　of　freshness　and　still　more　wanting　perhaps　in　tact；　as　to
whether　she　didn't　mean　to　go　to　church；　since　that　was　an　obvious
way　of　being　good。　　She　made　answer　that　she　had　performed　this　duty
in　the　morning；　and　that　for　her；　of　Sunday　afternoons；　supreme
virtue　consisted　in　answering　the　week's　letters。　　Then　suddenly　and
without　transition　she　brought　out：　　〃It's　quite　a　mistake　about
Dolcino's　being　better。　　I've　seen　him　and　he's　not　at　all　right。〃

I　wondered；　and　somehow　I　think　I　scarcely　believed。　　〃Surely　his
mother　would　know；　wouldn't　she？〃

She　appeared　for　a　moment　to　be　counting　the　leaves　on　one　of　the
great　beeches。　　〃As　regards　most　matters　one　can　easily　say　what；　in
a　given　situation；　my　sister…in…law　will；　or　would；　do。　　But　in　the
present　case　there　are　strange　elements　at　work。〃

〃Strange　elements？　　Do　you　mean　in　the　constitution　of　the　child？〃

〃No；　I　mean　in　my　sister…in…law's　feelings。〃

〃Elements　of　affection　of　course；　elements　of　anxiety；〃　I　concurred。
〃But　why　do　you　call　them　strange？〃

She　repeated　my　words。　　〃Elements　of　affection；　elements　of　anxiety。
She's　very　anxious。〃

Miss　Ambient　put　me　indescribably　ill　at　ease；　she　almost　scared　me；
and　I　wished　she　would　go　and　write　her　letters。　　〃His　father　will
have　seen　him　now；〃　I　said；　〃and　if　he's　not　satisfied　he　will　send
for　the　doctor。〃

〃The　doctor　ought　to　have　been　here　this　morning；〃　she　promptly
returned。　　〃He　lives　only　two　miles　away。〃

I　reflected　that　all　this　was　very　possibly　but　a　part　of　the　general
tragedy　of　Miss　Ambient's　view　of　things；　yet　I　asked　her　why　she
hadn't　urged　that　view　on　her　sister…in…law。　　She　answered　me　with　a
smile　of　extraordinary　significance　and　observed　that　I　must　have
very　little　idea　of　her　〃peculiar〃　relations　with　Beatrice；　but　I
must　do　her　the　justice　that　she　re…enforced　this　a　little　by　the
plea　that　any　distinguishable　alarm　of　Mark's　was　ground　enough　for　a
difference　of　his　wife's。　　He　was　always　nervous　about　the　child；　and
as　they　were　predestined　by　nature　to　take　opposite　views；　the　only
thing　for　the　mother　was　to　cultivate　a　false　optimism。　　In　Mark's
absence　and　that　of　his　betrayed　fear　she　would　have　been　less　easy。
I　remembered　what　he　had　said　to　me　about　their　dealings　with　their
sonthat　between　them　they'd　probably　put　an　end　to　him；　but　I
didn't　repeat　this　to　Miss　Ambient：　　the　less　so　that　just　then　her
brother　emerged　from　the　house；　carrying　the　boy　in　his　arms。　　Close
behind　him　moved　his　wife；　grave　and　pale；　the　little　sick　face　was
turned　over　Ambient's　shoulder　and　toward　the　mother。　　We　rose　to
receive　the　group；　and　as　they　came　near　us　Dolcino　twisted　himself
about。　　His　enchanting　eyes　showed　me　a　smile　of　recognition；　in
which；　for　the　moment；　I　should　have　taken　a　due　degree　of　comfort。
Miss　Ambient；　however；　received　another　impression；　and　I　make　haste
to　say　that　her　quick　sensibility；　which　visibly　went　out　to　the
child；　argues　that　in　spite　of　her　affectations　she　might　have　been
of　some　human　use。　　〃It　won't　do　at　allit　won't　do　at　all；〃　she
said　to　me　under　her　breath。　　〃I　shall　speak　to　Mark　about　the
Doctor。〃

Her　small　nephew　was　rather　white；　but　the　main　difference　I　saw　in
him　was　that　he　was　even　more　beautiful　than　the　day　before。　　He　had
been　dressed　in　his　festal　garmentsa　velvet　suit　and　a　crimson
sashand　he　looked　like　a　little　invalid　prince　too　young　to　know
condescension　and　smiling　familiarly　on　his　subjects。

〃Put　him　down；　Mark；　he's　not　a　bit　at　his　ease；〃　Mrs。　Ambient　said。

〃Should　you　like　to　stand　on　your　feet；　my　boy？〃　his　father　asked。

He　made　a　motion　that　quickly　responded。　　〃Oh　yes；　I'm　remarkably
well。〃

Mark　placed　him　on　the　ground；　he　had　shining　pointed　shoes　with
enormous　bows。　　〃Are　you　happy　now；　Mr。　Ambient？〃

〃Oh　yes；　I'm　particularly　happy；〃　Dolcino　replied。　　But　the　words
were　scarce　out　of　his　mouth　when　his　mother　caught　him　up　and；　in　a
moment；　holding　him　on　her　knees；　took　her　place　on　the　bench　where
Miss　Ambient　and　I　had　been　sitting。　　This　young　lady　said　something
to　her　brother；　in　consequence　of　which　the　two　wandered　away　into
the　garden　together。



CHAPTER　IV



I　remained　with　Mrs。　Ambient；　but　as　a　servant　had　brought　out　a
couple　of　chairs　I　wasn't　obliged　to　seat　myself　beside　her。　　Our
conversation　failed　of　ease；　and　I；　for　my　part；　felt　there　would　be
a　shade　of　hypocrisy　in　my　now　trying　to　make　myself　agreeable　to　the
partner　of　my　friend's　existence。　　I　didn't　dislike　herI　rather
admired　her；　but　I　was　aware　that　I　differed　from　her　inexpressibly。
Then　I　suspected；　what　I　afterwards　definitely　knew　and　have　already
intimated；　that　the　poor　lady　felt　small　taste　for　her　husband's　so
undisguised　disciple；　and　this　of　course　was　not　encouraging。　　She
thought　me　an　obtrusive　and　designing；　even　perhaps　a　depraved；　young
man　whom　a　perverse　Providence　had　dropped　upon　their　quiet　lawn　to
flatter　his　worst　tendencies。　　She　did　me　the　honour　to　say　to　Miss
Ambient；　who　repeated　the　speech；　that　she　didn't　know　when　she　had
seen　their　companion　take　such　a　fancy　to　a　visitor；　and　she　measured
apparently　my　evil　influence　by　Mark's　appreciation　of　my　society。　　I
had　a　consciousness；　not　oppressive　but　quite　sufficient；　of　all
this；　though　I　must　say　that　if　it　chilled　my　flow　of　small…talk　it
yet　didn't　prevent　my　thinking　the　beautiful　mother　and　beautiful
child；　interlaced　there　against　their　background　of　roses；　a　picture
such　as　I　doubtless　shouldn't　soon　see　again。　　I　was　free；　I
supposed；　to　go　into　the　house　and　write　letters；　to　sit　in　the
drawing…room；　to　repair　to　my　own　apartment　and　take　a　nap；　but　the
only　use　I　made　of　my　freedom　was　to　linger　still　in　my　chair　and　say
to　myself　that　the　light　hand　of　Sir　Joshua　might　have　painted　Mark
Ambient's　wife　and　son。　　I　found　myself　looking　perpetually　at　the
latter　small　mortal；　who　looked　constantly　back　at　me；　and　that　was
enough　to　detain　me。　　With　these　vaguely…amused　eyes　he　smiled；　and　I
felt　it　an　absolute　impossibility　to　abandon　a　child　with　such　an
expression。　　His　attention　never　strayed；　it　attached　itself　to　my
face　as　if　among　all　the　small　incipient　things　of　his　nature
throbbed　a　desire　to　say　something　to　me。　　If　I　could　have　taken　him
on　my　own　knee　he　perhaps　would　have　managed　to　say　it；　but　it　would
have　been　a　critical　matter　to　ask　his　mother　to　give　him　up；　and　it
has　remained　a　constant　regret　for　me　that　on　that　strange　Sunday
afternoon　I　didn't　even　for　a　moment　hold　Dolcino　in　my　arms。　　He　had
said　he　felt　remarkably　well　and　was　especially　happy；　but　though
peace　may　have　been　with　him　as　he　pillowed　his　charming　head　on　his
mother's　breast；　dropping　his　little　crimson　silk　legs　from　her　lap；
I　somehow　didn't　think　security　was。　　He　made　no　attempt　to　walk
about；　he　was　content　to　swing　his　legs　softly　and　strike　one　as
languid　and　angelic。

Mark　returned　to　us　with　his　sister；　and　Miss　Ambient；　repeating　her
mention　of　the　claims　of　her　correspondence；　passed　into　the　house。
Mark　came　and　stood　in　front　of　his　wife；　looking　down　at　the　child；
who　immediately　took　hold　of　his　hand　and　kept　it　while　he　stayed。
〃I　think　Mackintosh　ought　to　see　him；〃　he　said；　〃I　think　I'll　walk
over　and　fetch　him。〃

〃That's　Gwendolen's　idea；　I　suppose；〃　Mrs。　Ambient　replied　very
sweetly。

〃It's　not　such　an　out…of…the…way　idea　when　one's　child's　ill；〃　he
returned。

〃I'm　not　ill；　papa；　I'm　much　better　now；〃　sounded　in　the　boy's　silver
pipe。

〃Is　that　the　truth；　or　are　you　only　saying　it　to　be　agreeable？
You've　a　great　idea　of　being　agreeable；　you