youth-第24章

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satisfy　every　need；　every　desire；　every　caprice；　nay；　every　vice；

of　the　being　beloved。　People　who　love　thus　always　love　their　life

long；　since；　the　more　they　love；　the　more　they　get　to　know　the

object　beloved；　and　the　easier　they　find　the　task　of　loving　it

that　is　to　say；　of　satisfying　its　desires。　Their　love　seldom

finds　expression　in　words；　but　if　it　does　so；　it　expresses　itself

neither　with　assurance　nor　beauty；　but　rather　in　a　shamefaced；

awkward　manner；　since　people　of　this　kind　invariably　have

misgivings　that　they　are　loving　unworthily。　People　of　this　kind

love　even　the　faults　of　their　adored　one；　for　the　reason　that

those　faults　afford　them　the　power　of　constantly　satisfying　new

desires。　They　look　for　their　affection　to　be　returned；　and　even

deceive　themselves　into　believing　that　it　is　returned；　and　are

happy　accordingly：　yet　in　the　reverse　case　they　will　still

continue　to　desire　happiness　for　their　beloved　one；　and　try　by

every　means　in　their　powerwhether　moral　or　material；　great　or

smallto　provide　it。



Such　practical　love　it　waslove　for　her　nephew；　for　her　niece；

for　her　sister；　for　Lubov　Sergievna；　and　even　for　myself；　because

I　loved　Dimitrithat　shone　in　the　eyes；　as　well　as　in　the　every

word　and　movement；　of　Sophia　Ivanovna。



Only　long　afterwards　did　I　learn　to　value　her　at　her　true　worth。

Yet　even　now　the　question　occurred　to　me：　〃What　has　made　Dimitri

who　throughout　has　tried　to　understand　love　differently　to　other

young　fellows；　and　has　always　had　before　his　eyes　the　gentle；

loving　Sophia　Ivanovnasuddenly　fall　so　deeply　in　love　with　the

incomprehensible　Lubov　Sergievna；　and　declare　that　in　his　aunt　he

can　only　find　good　QUALITIES？　Verily　it　is　a　true　saying　that　'a

prophet　hath　no　honour　in　his　own　country。'　One　of　two　things：

either　every　man　has　in　him　more　of　bad　than　of　good；　or　every

man　is　more　receptive　to　bad　than　to　good。　Lubov　Sergievna　he　has

not　known　for　long；　whereas　his　aunt's　love　he　has　known　since

the　day　of　his　birth。〃



XXV



I　BECOME　BETTER　ACQUAINTED　WITH　THE　NECHLUDOFFS



WHEN　I　returned　to　the　verandah；　I　found　that　they　were　not

talking　of　me　at　all；　as　I　had　anticipated。　On　the　contrary；

Varenika　had　laid　aside　the　book；　and　was　engaged　in　a　heated

dispute　with　Dimitri；　who；　for　his　part；　was　walking　up　and　down

the　verandah；　and　frowningly　adjusting　his　neck　in　his　collar　as

he　did　so。　The　subject　of　the　quarrel　seemed　to　be　Ivan

Yakovlevitch　and　superstition；　but　it　was　too　animated　a

difference　for　its　underlying　cause　not　to　be　something　which

concerned　the　family　much　more　nearly。　Although　the　Princess　and

Lubov　Sergievna　were　sitting　by　in　silence；　they　were　following

every　word；　and　evidently　tempted　at　times　to　take　part　in　the

dispute；　yet　always；　just　when　they　were　about　to　speak；　they

checked　themselves；　and　left　the　field　clear　for　the　two

principles；　Dimitri　and　Varenika。　On　my　entry；　the　latter　glanced

at　me　with　such　an　indifferent　air　that　I　could　see　she　was

wholly　absorbed　in　the　quarrel　and　did　not　care　whether　she　spoke

in　my　presence　or　not。　The　Princess　too　looked　the　same；　and　was

clearly　on　Varenika's　side；　while　Dimitri　began；　if　anything；　to

raise　his　voice　still　more　when　I　appeared；　and　Lubov　Sergievna；

for　her　part；　observed　to　no　one　in　particular：　〃Old　people　are

quite　right　when　they　say；　'Si　jeunesse　savait；　si　vieillesse

pouvait。'〃



Nevertheless　this　quotation　did　not　check　the　dispute；　though　it

somehow　gave　me　the　impression　that　the　side　represented　by　the

speaker　and　her　friend　was　in　the　wrong。　Although　it　was　a　little

awkward　for　me　to　be　present　at　a　petty　family　difference；　the

fact　that　the　true　relations　of　the　family　revealed　themselves

during　its　progress；　and　that　my　presence　did　nothing　to　hinder

that　revelation；　afforded　me　considerable　gratification。



How　often　it　happens　that　for　years　one　sees　a　family　cover

themselves　over　with　a　conventional　cloak　of　decorum；　and

preserve　the　real　relations　of　its　members　a　secret　from　every

eye！　How　often；　too；　have　I　remarked　that；　the　more　impenetrable

（and　therefore　the　more　decorous）　is　the　cloak；　the　harsher　are

the　relations　which　it　conceals！　Yet；　once　let　some　unexpected

questionoften　a　most　trivial　one　（the　colour　of　a　woman's　hair；

a　visit；　a　man's　horses；　and　so　forth）arise　in　that　family

circle；　and　without　any　visible　cause　there　will　also　arise　an

ever…growing　difference；　until　in　time　the　cloak　of　decorum

becomes　unequal　to　confining　the　quarrel　within　due　bounds；　and；

to　the　dismay　of　the　disputants　and　the　astonishment　of　the

auditors；　the　real　and　ill…adjusted　relations　of　the　family　are

laid　bare；　and　the　cloak；　now　useless　for　concealment；　is　bandied

from　hand　to　hand　among　the　contending　factions　until　it　serves

only　to　remind　one　of　the　years　during　which　it　successfully

deceived　one's　perceptions。　Sometimes　to　strike　one's　head

violently　against　a　ceiling　hurts　one　less　than　just　to　graze

some　spot　which　has　been　hurt　and　bruised　before：　and　in　almost

every　family　there　exists　some　such　raw　and　tender　spot。　In　the

Nechludoff　family　that　spot　was　Dimitri's　extraordinary　affection

for　Lubov　Sergievna；　which　aroused　in　the　mother　and　sister；　if

not　a　jealous　feeling；　at　all　events　a　sense　of　hurt　family

pride。　This　was　the　grave　significance　which　underlay；　for　all

those　present；　the　seeming　dispute　about　Ivan　Yakovlevitch　and

superstition。



〃In　anything　that　other　people　deride　and　despise　you　invariably

profess　to　see　something　extraordinarily　good！〃　Varenika　was

saying　in　her　clear　voice；　as　she　articulated　each　syllable　with

careful　precision。



〃Indeed？〃　retorted　Dimitri　with　an　impatient　toss　of　his　head。

〃Now；　in　the　first　place；　only　a　most　unthinking　person　could

ever　speak　of　DESPISING　such　a　remarkable　man　as　Ivan

Yakovlevitch；　while；　in　the　second　place；　it　is　YOU　who

invariably　profess　to　see　nothing　good　in　what　confronts　you。〃



Meanwhile　Sophia　Ivanovna　kept　looking　anxiously　at　us　as　she

turned　first　to　her　nephew；　and　then　to　her　niece；　and　then　to

myself。　Twice　she　opened　her　mouth　as　though　to　say　what　was　in

her　mind　and　drew　a　deep　sigh。



〃Varia；　PLEASE　go　on　reading；〃　she　said　at　length；　at　the　same

time　handing　her　niece　the　book；　and　patting　her　hand　kindly。　〃I

wish　to　know　whether　he　ever　found　HER　again　〃　（as　a　matter　of

fact；　the　novel　in　question　contained　not　a　word　about　any　one

finding　any　one　else）。　〃And；　Mitia　dear；〃　she　added　to　her

nephew；　despite　the　glum　looks　which　he　was　throwing　at　her　for

having　interrupted　the　logical　thread　of　his　deductions；　〃you　had

better　let　me　poultice　your　cheek；　or　your　teeth　will　begin　to

ache　again。〃



After　that　the　reading　was　resumed。　Yet　the　quarrel　had　in　no　way

dispelled　the　calm　atmosphere　of　family　and　intellectual　harmony

which　enveloped　this　circle　of　ladies。



Clearly　deriving　its　inspiration　and　character　from　the　Princess

Maria　Ivanovna；　it　was　a　circle　which；　for　me；　had　a　wholly　novel

and　attractive　character　of　logicalness　mingled　with　simplicity

and　refinement。　That　character　I　could　discern　in　the　daintiness；

good　taste；　and　solidity　of　everything　about　me；　whether　the

handbell；　the　binding　of　the　book；　the　settee；　or　the　table。

Likewise；　I　divined　it　in　the　upright；　well…corseted　pose　of　the

Princess；　in　her　pendant　curls　of　grey　hair；　in　the　manner　in

which　she　had；　at　our　first　introduction；　called　me　plain

〃Nicolas〃　and　〃he；〃　in　the　occupations　of　the　ladies　（the

reading　and　the　sewing　of　garments）；　and　in　the　unusual　whiteness

of　their　hands。　Those　hands；　en　passant；　showed　a　family　feature

common　to　allnamely；　the　feature　that　the　flesh　of　the　palm　on

the　outer　side　was　rosy　in　colour；　and　divided　by　a　sharp；

straight　line　from　the　pure　whiteness　of　the　upper　portion　of　the

hand。　Still　more　was　the　character　of　this　feminine　circle

expressed　in　the　manner　in　which　the　three