youth-第22章

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and　the　line　of　her　waist　was　scarcely　visible　at　all。



Notwithstanding　that　the　Princess　Maria　Ivanovna　had　black　hair

and　eyes；　while　Sophia　Ivanovna　had　white　hair　and　large；

vivacious；　tranquilly　blue　eyes　（a　rare　combination）；　there　was　a

great　likeness　between　the　two　sisters；　for　they　had　the　same

expression；　nose；　and　lips。　The　only　difference　was　that　Sophia's

nose　and　lips　were　a　trifle　coarser　than　Maria's；　and　that；　when

she　smiled；　those　features　inclined　towards　the　right；

whereas　Maria's　inclined　towards　the　left。　Sophia；　to　judge　by

her　dress　and　coiffure；　was　still　youthful　at　heart；　and　would

never　have　displayed　grey　curls；　even　if　she　had　possessed　them。

Yet　at　first　her　glance　and　bearing　towards　me　seemed　very　proud；

and　made　me　nervous；　whereas　I　at　once　felt　at　home　with　the

Princess。　Perhaps　it　was　only　Sophia's　stoutness　and　a　certain

resemblance　to　portraits　of　Catherine　the　Great　that　gave　her；　in

my　eyes；　a　haughty　aspect；　but　at　all　events　I　felt　quite

intimidated　when　she　looked　at　me　intently　and　said；　〃Friends　of

our　friends　are　our　friends　also。〃　I　became　reassured　and　changed

my　opinion　about　her　only　when；　after　saying　those　words；　she

opened　her　mouth　and　sighed　deeply。　It　may　be　that　she　owed　her

habit　of　sighing　after　every　few　wordswith　a　great　distention

of　the　mouth　and　a　slight　drooping　of　her　large　blue　eyesto　her

stoutness；　yet　it　was　none　the　less　one　which　expressed　so　much

good…humour　that　I　at　once　lost　all　fear　of　her；　and　found　her

actually　attractive。　Her　eyes　were　charming；　her　voice　pleasant

and　musical；　and　even　the　flowing　lines　of　her　fullness　seemed　to

my　youthful　vision　not　wholly　lacking　in　beauty。



I　had　imagined　that　Lubov　Sergievna；　as　my　friend's　friend；　would

at　once　say　something　friendly　and　familiar　to　me；　yet；　after

gazing　at　me　fixedly　for　a　while；　as　though　in　doubt　whether　the

remark　she　was　about　to　make　to　me　would　not　be　too　friendly；　she

at　length　asked　me　what　faculty　I　was　in。　After　that　she　stared

at　me　as　before；　in　evident　hesitation　as　to　whether　or　not　to

say　something　civil　and　familiar；　until；　remarking　her

perplexity；　I　besought　her　with　a　look　to　speak　freely。　Yet　all

she　then　said　was；　〃They　tell　me　the　Universities　pay　very　little

attention　to　science　now；〃　and　turned　away　to　call　her　little

dog。



All　that　evening　she　spoke　only　in　disjointed　fragments　of　this

kindfragments　which　had　no　connection　either　with　the　point　or

with　one　another；　yet　I　had　such　faith　in　Dimitri；　and　he　so

often　kept　looking　from　her　to　me　with　an　expression　which　mutely

asked　me；　〃Now；　what　do　you　think　of　that？〃　that；　though　I

entirely　failed　to　persuade　myself　that　in　Lubov　Sergievna　there

was　anything　to　speak　of；　I　could　not　bear　to　express　the

thought；　even　to　myself。



As　for　the　last　member　of　the　family；　Varenika；　she　was　a　well…

developed　girl　of　sixteen。　The　only　good　features　in　her　were　a

pair　of　dark…grey　eyes；which；　in　their　expression　of　gaiety

mingled　with　quiet　attention；　greatly　resembled　those　of　her

aunta　long　coil　of　flaxen　hair；　and　extremely　delicate；

beautiful　hands。



〃I　expect；　Monsieur　Nicolas；　you　find　it　wearisome　to　hear　a

story　begun　from　the　middle？〃　said　Sophia　Ivanovna　with　her　good…

natured　sigh　as　she　turned　over　some　pieces　of　clothing　which　she

was　sewing。　The　reading　aloud　had　ceased　for　the　moment　because

Dimitri　had　left　the　room　on　some　errand　or　another。



〃Or　perhaps　you　have　read　Rob　Roy　before？〃　she　added。



At　that　period　I　thought　it　incumbent　upon　me；　in　virtue　of　my

student's　uniform；　to　reply　in　a　very　〃clever　and　original〃

manner　to　every　question　put　to　me　by　people　whom　I　did　not　know

very　well；　and　regarded　such　short；　clear　answers　as　〃Yes；〃　〃No；〃

〃I　like　it；〃　or　〃I　do　not　care　for　it；〃　as　things　to　be　ashamed

of。　Accordingly；　looking　down　at　my　new　and　fashionably…cut

trousers　and　the　glittering　buttons　of　my　tunic；　I　replied　that　I

had　never　read　Rob　Roy；　but　that　it　interested　me　greatly　to　hear

it；　since　I　preferred　to　read　books　from　the　middle　rather　than

from　the　beginning。



〃It　is　twice　as　interesting；〃　I　added　with　a　self…satisfied

smirk；　〃for　then　one　can　guess　what　has　gone　before　as　well　as

what　is　to　come　after。〃



The　Princess　smiled　what　I　thought　was　a　forced　smile；　but　one

which　I　discovered　later　to　be　her　only　one。



〃Well；　perhaps　that　is　true；〃　she　said。　〃But　tell　me；　Nicolas

（you　will　not　be　offended　if　I　drop　the　Monsieur）tell　me；　are

you　going　to　be　in　town　long？　When　do　you　go　away？〃



〃I　do　not　know　quite。　Perhaps　to…morrow；　or　perhaps　not　for　some

while　yet；〃　I　replied　for　some　reason　or　another；　though　I　knew

perfectly　well　that　in　reality　we　were　to　go　to…morrow。



〃I　wish　you　could　stop　longer；　both　for　your　own　sake　and　for

Dimitri's；〃　she　said　in　a　meditative　manner。　〃At　your　age

friendship　is　a　weak　thing。〃



I　felt　that　every　one　was　looking　at　me；　and　waiting　to　see　what

I　should　saythough　certainly　Varenika　made　a　pretence　of

looking　at　her　aunt's　work。　I　felt；　in　fact；　as　though　I　were

being　put　through　an　examination；　and　that　it　behoved　me　to

figure　in　it　as　well　as　possible。



〃Yes；　to　ME　Dimitri's　friendship　is　most　useful；〃　I　replied；　〃but

to　HIM　mine　cannot　be　of　any　use　at　all；　since　he　is　a　thousand

times　better　than　I。〃　（Dimitri　could　not　hear　what　I　said；　or　I

should　have　feared　his　detecting　the　insincerity　of　my　words。）



Again　the　Princess　smiled　her　unnatural；　yet　characteristically

natural；　smile。



〃Just　listen　to　him！〃　she　said。　〃But　it　is　YOU　who　are　the　little

monster　of　perfection。〃



〃'Monster　of　perfection；'〃　I　thought　to　myself。　〃That　is

splendid。　I　must　make　a　note　of　it。〃



〃Yet；　to　dismiss　yourself；　he　has　been　extraordinarily　clever　in

that　quarter；〃　she　went　on　in　a　lower　tone　（which　pleased　me

somehow）　as　she　indicated　Lubov　Sergievna　with　her　eyes；　〃since

he　has　discovered　in　our　poor　little　Auntie〃　（such　was　the　pet

name　which　they　gave　Lubov）　〃all　sorts　of　perfections　which　I；

who　have　known　her　and　her　little　dog　for　twenty　years；　had　never

yet　suspected。　〃Varenika；　go　and　tell　them　to　bring　me　a　glass　of

water；〃　she　added；　letting　her　eyes　wander　again。　Probably　she

had　bethought　her　that　it　was　too　soon；　or　not　entirely

necessary；　to　let　me　into　all　the　family　secrets。　〃Yet　nolet

HIM　go；　for　he　has　nothing　to　do；　while　you　are　reading。　Pray　go

to　the　door；　my　friend；〃　she　said　to　me；　〃and　walk　about　fifteen

steps　down　the　passage。　Then　halt　and　call　out　pretty　loudly；

〃Peter；　bring　Maria　Ivanovna　a　glass　of　iced　water〃and　she

smiled　her　curious　smile　once　more。



〃I　expect　she　wants　to　say　something　about　me　in　my　absence；〃　I

thought　to　myself　as　I　left　the　room。　〃I　expect　she　wants　to

remark　that　she　can　see　very　clearly　that　I　am　a　very；　very

clever　young　man。〃



Hardly　had　I　taken　a　dozen　steps　when　I　was　overtaken　by　Sophia

Ivanovna；　who；　though　fat　and　short　of　breath；　trod　with

surprising　lightness　and　agility。



〃Merci；　mon　cher；〃　she　said。　〃I　will　go　and　tell　them　myself。〃



XXIV



LOVE



SOPHIA　IVANOVNA；　as　I　afterwards　came　to　know　her；　was　one　of

those　rare；　young…old　women　who　are　born　for　family　life；　but　to

whom　that　happiness　has　been　denied　by　fate。　Consequently　all

that　store　of　their　love　which　should　have　been

poured　out　upon　a　husband　and　children　becomes　pent　up　in　their

hearts；　until　they　suddenly　decide　to　let　it　overflow　upon　a　few

chosen　individuals。　Yet　so　inexhaustible　is　that　store　of　old

maids'　love　that；　despite　the　number　of　individuals　so　selected；

there　still　remains　an　abundant　surplus　of　affection　which　they

lavish　upon　all　by　whom　they　are　surroundedupon　all；　good　or

bad；　whom　they　may　chance　to　meet　in　their　daily　life。



Of　love　there　are　three　kindslove　of　beauty；　the　love　which

denies　itself；　and　practical　love。



Of　the　desire　of　a　young　man　for　a　you