travels with a donkey in the cevennes-第13章
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But he could not away with such a monstrous attitude。 'No; no;' he
cried; 'you must change。 You have come here; God has led you here;
and you must embrace the opportunity。'
I made a slip in policy; I appealed to the family affections;
though I was speaking to a priest and a soldier; two classes of men
circumstantially divorced from the kind and homely ties of life。
'Your father and mother?' cried the priest。 'Very well; you will
convert them in their turn when you go home。'
I think I see my father's face! I would rather tackle the
Gaetulian lion in his den than embark on such an enterprise against
the family theologian。
But now the hunt was up; priest and soldier were in full cry for my
conversion; and the Work of the Propagation of the Faith; for which
the people of Cheylard subscribed forty…eight francs ten centimes
during 1877; was being gallantly pursued against myself。 It was an
odd but most effective proselytising。 They never sought to
convince me in argument; where I might have attempted some defence;
but took it for granted that I was both ashamed and terrified at my
position; and urged me solely on the point of time。 Now; they
said; when God had led me to Our Lady of the Snows; now was the
appointed hour。
'Do not be withheld by false shame;' observed the priest; for my
encouragement。
For one who feels very similarly to all sects of religion; and who
has never been able; even for a moment; to weigh seriously the
merit of this or that creed on the eternal side of things; however
much he may see to praise or blame upon the secular and temporal
side; the situation thus created was both unfair and painful。 I
committed my second fault in tact; and tried to plead that it was
all the same thing in the end; and we were all drawing near by
different sides to the same kind and undiscriminating Friend and
Father。 That; as it seems to lay spirits; would be the only gospel
worthy of the name。 But different men think differently; and this
revolutionary aspiration brought down the priest with all the
terrors of the law。 He launched into harrowing details of hell。
The damned; he said … on the authority of a little book which he
had read not a week before; and which; to add conviction to
conviction; he had fully intended to bring along with him in his
pocket … were to occupy the same attitude through all eternity in
the midst of dismal tortures。 And as he thus expatiated; he grew
in nobility of aspect with his enthusiasm。
As a result the pair concluded that I should seek out the Prior;
since the Abbot was from home; and lay my case immediately before
him。
'C'EST MON CONSEIL COMME ANCIEN MILITAIRE;' observed the
commandant; 'ET CELUI DE MONSIEUR COMME PRETRE。'
'OUI;' added the CURE; sententiously nodding; 'COMME ANCIEN
MILITAIRE … ET COMME PRETRE。'
At this moment; whilst I was somewhat embarrassed how to answer; in
came one of the monks; a little brown fellow; as lively as a grig;
and with an Italian accent; who threw himself at once into the
contention; but in a milder and more persuasive vein; as befitted
one of these pleasant brethren。 Look at HIM; he said。 The rule
was very hard; he would have dearly liked to stay in his own
country; Italy … it was well known how beautiful it was; the
beautiful Italy; but then there were no Trappists in Italy; and he
had a soul to save; and here he was。
I am afraid I must be at bottom; what a cheerful Indian critic has
dubbed me; 'a faddling hedonist;' for this description of the
brother's motives gave me somewhat of a shock。 I should have
preferred to think he had chosen the life for its own sake; and not
for ulterior purposes; and this shows how profoundly I was out of
sympathy with these good Trappists; even when I was doing my best
to sympathise。 But to the CURE the argument seemed decisive。
'Hear that!' he cried。 'And I have seen a marquis here; a marquis;
a marquis' … he repeated the holy word three times over … 'and
other persons high in society; and generals。 And here; at your
side; is this gentleman; who has been so many years in armies …
decorated; an old warrior。 And here he is; ready to dedicate
himself to God。'
I was by this time so thoroughly embarrassed that I pled cold feet;
and made my escape from the apartment。 It was a furious windy
morning; with a sky much cleared; and long and potent intervals of
sunshine; and I wandered until dinner in the wild country towards
the east; sorely staggered and beaten upon by the gale; but
rewarded with some striking views。
At dinner the Work of the Propagation of the Faith was recommenced;
and on this occasion still more distastefully to me。 The priest
asked me many questions as to the contemptible faith of my fathers;
and received my replies with a kind of ecclesiastical titter。
'Your sect;' he said once; 'for I think you will admit it would be
doing it too much honour to call it a religion。'
'As you please; monsieur;' said I。 'LA PAROLE EST A VOUS。'
At length I grew annoyed beyond endurance; and although he was on
his own ground and; what is more to the purpose; an old man; and so
holding a claim upon my toleration; I could not avoid a protest
against this uncivil usage。 He was sadly discountenanced。
'I assure you。' he said; 'I have no inclination to laugh in my
heart。 I have no other feeling but interest in your soul。'
And there ended my conversion。 Honest man! he was no dangerous
deceiver; but a country parson; full of zeal and faith。 Long may
he tread Gevaudan with his kilted skirts … a man strong to walk and
strong to comfort his parishioners in death! I daresay he would
beat bravely through a snowstorm where his duty called him; and it
is not always the most faithful believer who makes the cunningest
apostle。
UPPER GEVAUDAN
(continued)
The bed was made; the room was fit;
By punctual eve the stars were lit;
The air was still; the water ran;
No need there was for maid or man;
When we put up; my ass and I;
At God's green caravanserai。
OLD PLAY。
ACROSS THE GOULET
THE wind fell during dinner; and the sky remained clear; so it was
under better auspices that I loaded Modestine before the monastery
gate。 My Irish friend accompanied me so far on the way。 As we
came through the wood; there was Pere Apollinaire hauling his
barrow; and he too quitted his labours to go with me for perhaps a
hundred yards; holding my hand between both of his in front of him。
I parted first from one and then from the other with unfeigned
regret; but yet with the glee of the traveller who shakes off the
dust of one stage before hurrying forth upon another。 Then
Modestine and I mounted the course of the Allier; which here led us
back into Gevaudan towards its sources in the forest of Mercoire。
It was but an inconsiderable burn before we left its guidance。
Thence; over a hill; our way lay through a naked plateau; until we
reached Chasserades at sundown。
The company in the inn kitchen that night were all men employed in
survey for one of the projected railways。 They were intelligent
and conversible; and we decided the future of France over hot wine;
until the state of the clock frightened us to rest。 There were
four beds in the little upstairs room; and we slept six。 But I had
a bed to myself; and persuaded them to leave the window open。
'HE; BOURGEOIS; IL EST CINQ HEURES!' was the cry that wakened me in
the morning (Saturday; September 28th)。 The room was full of a
transparent darkness; which dimly showed me the other three beds
and the five different nightcaps on the pillows。 But out of the
window the dawn was growing ruddy in a long belt over the hill…
tops; and day was about to flood the plateau。 The hour was
inspiritin