letters to his son, 1750-第19章
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s and senseless usurper。
You will think that I shall never have done recommending to you these exterior worldly accomplishments； and you will think right； for I never shall； they are of too great consequence to you for me to be indifferent or negligent about them： the shining part of your future figure and fortune depends now wholly upon them。 These are the acquisitions which must give efficacy and success to those you have already made。 To have it said and believed that you are the most learned man in England； would be no more than was said and believed of Dr。 Bentley； but to have it said； at the same time； that you are also the best…bred； most polite； and agreeable man in the kingdom； would be such a happy composition of a character as I never yet knew any one man deserve； and which I will endeavor； as well as ardently wish； that you may。 Absolute perfection is； I well know； unattainable； but I know too； that a man of parts may be unweariedly aiming at it； and arrive pretty near it。 Try； labor； persevere。 Adieu。
LETTER CXXI
LONDON； November 8； O。 S。 1750
MY DEAR FRIEND： Before you get to Paris； where you will soon be left to your own discretion； if you have any； it is necessary that we should understand one another thoroughly； which is the most probable way of preventing disputes。 Money； the cause of much mischief in the world； is the cause of most quarrels between fathers and sons； the former commonly thinking that they cannot give too little； and the latter； that they cannot have enough； both equally in the wrong。 You must do me the justice to acknowledge； that I have hitherto neither stinted nor grudged any expense that could be of use or real pleasure to you； and I can assure you； by the way； that you have traveled at a much more considerable expense than I did myself； but I never so much as thought of that； while Mr。 Harte was at the head of your finances； being very sure that the sums granted were scrupulously applied to the uses for which they were intended。 But the case will soon be altered； and you will be your own receiver and treasurer。 However； I promise you； that we will not quarrel singly upon the quantum； which shall be cheerfully and freely granted： the application and appropriation of it will be the material point； which I am now going to clear up and finally settle with you。 I will fix； or even name； no settled allowance； though I well know in my own mind what would be the proper one； but I will first try your draughts； by which I can in a good degree judge of your conduct。 This only I tell you in general； that if the channels through which my money is to go are the proper ones； the source shall not be scanty； but should it deviate into dirty； muddy； and obscure ones （which by the bye； it cannot do for a week without my knowing it）； I give you fair and timely notice； that the source will instantly be dry。 Mr。 Harte； in establishing you at Paris； will point out to you those proper channels； he will leave you there upon the foot of a man of fashion； and I will continue you upon the same； you will have your coach； your valet de chambre； your own footman； and a valet de place； which； by the way； is one servant more than I had。 I would have you very well dressed； by which I mean dressed as the generality of people of fashion are； that is； not to be taken notice of； for being either more or less fine than other people： it is by being well dressed； not finely dressed； that a gentleman should be distinguished。 You must frequent 'les spectacles'； which expense I shall willingly supply。 You must play 'a des petits jeux de commerce' in mixed companies； that article is trifling； I shall pay it cheerfully。 All the other articles of pocket…money are very inconsiderable at Paris； in comparison of what they are here； the silly custom of giving money wherever one dines or sups； and the expensive importunity of subscriptions； not being yet introduced there。 Having thus reckoned up all the decent expenses of a gentleman； which I will most readily defray； I come now to those which I will neither bear nor supply。 The first of these is gaming； of which； though I have not the least reason to suspect you； I think it necessary eventually to assure you； that no consideration in the world shall ever make me pay your play debts； should you ever urge to me that your honor is pawned； I should most immovably answer you； that it was your honor； not mine； that was pawned； and that your creditor might e'en take the pawn for the debt。
Low company； and low pleasures； are always much more costly than liberal and elegant ones。 The disgraceful riots of a tavern are much more expensive； as well as dishonorable； than the sometimes pardonable excesses in good company。 I must absolutely hear of no tavern scrapes and squabbles。
I come now to another and very material point； I mean women； and I will not address myself to you upon this subject； either in a religious； a moral； or a parental style。 I will even lay aside my age； remember yours； and speak to you as one man of pleasure； if he had parts too； would speak to another。 I will by no means pay for whores； and their never…failing consequences； surgeons； nor will I； upon any account； keep singers； dancers； actresses； and 'id genus omne'； and； independently of the expense； I must tell you； that such connections would give me； and all sensible people； the utmost contempt for your parts and address； a young fellow must have as little sense as address； to venture； or more properly to sacrifice； his health and ruin his fortune； with such sort of creatures； in such a place as Paris especially； where gallantry is both the profession and the practice of every woman of fashion。 To speak plainly； I will not forgive your understanding cs and p…s； nor will your constitution forgive them you。 These distempers； as well as their cures； fall nine times in ten upon the lungs。 This argument； I am sure； ought to have weight with you： for I protest to you； that if you meet with any such accident； I would not give one year's purchase for your life。 Lastly； there is another sort of expense that I will not allow； only because it is a silly one； I mean the fooling away your money in baubles at toy shops。 Have one handsome snuff…box （if you take snuff）； and one handsome sword； but then no more pretty and very useless things。
By what goes before； you will easily perceive that I mean to allow you whatever is necessary； not only for the figure； but for the pleasures of a gentleman； and not to supply the profusion of a rake。 This； you must confess； does not savor of either the severity or parsimony of old age。 I consider this agreement between us； as a subsidiary treaty on my part； for services to be performed on yours。 I promise you； that I will be as punctual in the payment of the subsidies； as England has been during the last war； but then I give you notice at the same time； that I require a much more scrupulous execution of the treaty on your part； than we met with on that of our allies； or else that payment will be stopped。 I hope all that I have now said was absolutely unnecessary； and that sentiments more worthy and more noble than pecuniary ones； would of themselves have pointed out to you the conduct I recommend； but； at all events； I resolved to be once for all explicit with you； that； in the worst that can happen； you may not plead ignorance； and complain that I had not sufficiently explained to you my intentions。
Having mentioned the word rake； I must say a word or two more on that subject； because young people too frequently； and always fatally； are apt to mistake that character for that of a man of pleasure； whereas； there are not in the world two characters more different。 A rake is a composition of all the lowest； most ignoble； degrading； and shameful vices； they all conspire to disgrace his character； and to ruin his fortune； while wine and the p…s contend which shall soonest and most effectually destroy his constitution。 A dissolute； flagitious footman； or porter； makes full as good a rake as a man of the first quality。 By the bye； let me tell you； that in the wildest part of my youth； I never was a rake； but； on the contrary； always detested and despised
