remember the alamo-第14章
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brought into this world such ingrates! Go from me! You have
broken my heart!
He fell at her feet; and; in spite of her reluctance; took her
hands
〃Sweetest mother; wait but a little while。 You will see that
we are right。 Do not be cross with Juan。 I am going away。
Kiss me; mother。 Kiss me; and give me your blessing。〃
〃No; I will not bless you。 I will not kiss you。 You want
what is impossible; what is wicked。〃
〃I want freedom。〃
〃And to get freedom you tread upon your mother's heart。
Let loose my hands。 I am weary to death of this everlasting
talk of freedom。 I think indeed that the Americans know
but two words: freedom and dollars。 Ring for Rachela。 She;
at least; is faithful to me。〃
〃Not till you kiss me; mother。 Do not send me away unblessed
and unloved。 That is to doom me to misfortune。 Mi madre;
I beg this favor from you。〃 He had risen; but he still held
her hands; and he was weeping as innocent young men are not
ashamed to weep。
If she had looked at him! Oh; if she had but once looked at
his face; she could not have resisted its beauty; its sorrow;
its imploration! But she would not look。 She drew her hands
angrily away from him。 She turned her back upon her suppliant
son and imperiously summoned Rachela。
〃Good…by; mi madre。〃
〃Good…by; mi madre!〃
She would not turn to him; or answer him a word。
〃Mi madre; here comes Rachela! Say ‘God bless you; Juan。' It
is my last word; sweet mother!〃
She neither moved nor spoke。 The next moment Rachela
entered; and the wretched woman abandoned herself to her care
with vehement sobs and complainings。
Jack was inexpressibly sorrowful。 He went into the garden;
hoping in its silence and solitude to find some relief。 He
loved his mother with his strongest affection。 Every one of
her sobs wrung his heart。 Was it right to wound and disobey
her for the sake offreedom? Mother was a certain good;
freedom only a glorious promise。 Mother was a living fact;
freedom an intangible idea。
Ah; but men have always fought more passionately for ideas
than for facts! Tyrants are safe while they touch only silver
and gold; but when they try to bind a man's idealsthe
freedom of his citizenshipthe purity of his faithhe will
die to preserve them in their integrity。
Besides; freedom for every generation has but her hour。 If
that hour is not seized; no other may come for the men who
have suffered it to pass。 But mother would grow more loving
as the days went by。 And this was ever the end of Jack's
reasoning; for no man knows how deep the roots of his nature
strike into his native land; until he sees her in the
grasp of a tyrant; and hears her crying to him for
deliverance。
The struggle left the impress on his face。 He passed a
boundary in it。 Certain boyish feelings and graces would
never again be possible to him。 He went into the house;
weary; and longing for companionship that would comfort or
strengthen him。 Only Isabel was in the parlor。 She appeared
to be asleep among the sofa cushions; but she opened her eyes
wide as he took a chair beside her。
〃I have been waiting to kiss you again; Juan; do you think
this trouble will last very long?〃
〃It will be over directly; Iza。 Do not fret yourself about
it; angel mio。 The Americans are great fighters; and their
quarrel is just。 Well; then; it will be settled by the good
God quickly。〃
〃Rachela says that Santa Anna has sent off a million of men to
fight the Americans。 Some they will cut in pieces; and some
are to be sent to the mines to work in chains。〃
〃God is not dead of old age; Iza。 Santa Anna is a miraculous
tyrant。 He has committed every crime under heaven; but
I think he will not cut the Americans in pieces。〃
〃And if the Americans should even make him go back to Mexico!〃
〃I think that is very possible。〃
〃What then; Juan?〃
〃He would pay for some of his crimes here the rest he would
settle for in purgatory。 And you; too; Iza; are you with the
Americans?〃
〃Luis Alveda says they are right。〃
〃Oh…h! I see! So Luis is to be my brother too。 Is that so;
little dear?〃
〃Have you room in your heart for him? Or has this Dare Grant
filled it?〃
〃If I had twenty sisters; I should have room for twenty
brothers; if they were like Dare and Luis。 But; indeed; Luis
had his place there before I knew Dare。〃
〃And perhaps you may see him soon; he is with Senor Sam
Houston。 Senor Houston was here not a week ago。 Will you
think of that? And the mother and uncle of Luis are angry at
him; he will be disinherited; and we shall be very poor; I
think。 But there is always my father; who loves Luis。〃
〃Luis will win his own inheritance。 I think you will be very
rich。〃
〃And; Juan; if you see Luis; say to him; ‘Iza thinks of you
continually。'〃
At this moment Rachela angrily called her charge
〃Are you totally and forever wicked; disobedient one? Two
hours I have been kept waiting。 Very well! The; Sisters are
the only duenna for you; and back to the convent you shall go
to…morrow。 The Senora is of my mind; also。〃
〃My father will not permit it。 I will go to my father。 And
think of this; Rachela: I am no longer to be treated like a
baby。〃 But she kissed Juan ‘farewell;' and went away without
further dispute。
The handsome room looked strangely lonely and desolate when
the door had closed behind her。 Jack rose; and roughly shook
himself; as if by that means he hoped to throw off the
oppression and melancholy that was invading even his light
heart。 Hundreds of moths were dashing themselves to death
against the high glass shade that covered the blowing candles
from them。 He stood and looked at their hopeless efforts
to reach the flame。 He had an unpleasant thought; one of
those thoughts which have the force of a presentiment。 He put
it away with annoyance; muttering; 〃It is time enough to meet
misfortune when it comes。〃
The sound of a footstep made him stand erect and face the
door。
It was only a sleepy peon with a request that he would go to
his father's study。 A different mental atmosphere met him
there。 The doctor was walking up and down the room; and Dare
and Antonia sat together at the open window。
〃Your father wants to hear about our journey; Jack。 Take my
chair and tell him what happened。 Antonia and I will walk
within hearing; a roof makes me restless such a night as
this〃; for the waning moon had risen; and the cool wind from
the Gulf was shaking a thousand scents from the trees and the
flowering shrubs。
The change was made with the words; and the doctor sat down
beside his son。 〃I was asking; Jack; how you knew so much
about Texan affairs; and how you came so suddenly to take part
in them?〃
〃Indeed; father; we could not escape knowing。 The Texan fever
was more or less in every young man's blood。 One night Dare
had a supper at his rooms; and there were thirty of us
present。 A man called Faulknera fine fellow from
Nacogdochesspoke to us。 How do you think he spoke; when his
only brother; a lad of twenty; is working in a Mexican mine
loaded with chains?〃
〃For what?〃
〃He said one day that ‘the natural boundaries of the United
States are the Atlantic and Pacific oceans。' He was sent to
the mines for the words。 Faulkner's only hope for him is in
the independence of Texas。 He had us on fire in five
minutesall but Sandy McDonald; who loves to argue; and
therefore took the Mexican side。〃
〃What could he say for it?〃
〃He said it was a very unjustlike thing to make Mexico give
her American settlers in Texas two hundred and twenty…four
millions of acres because she thought a change of government
best for her own interests。〃
〃The Americans settled in Texas under the solemn guarantee of
the constitution of eighteen twenty…four。 How many of
them would have built homes under a tyrannical despotism like
that Santa Anna is now forcing upon them?〃 asked the doctor;
warmly。
〃McDonald said; ‘There is a deal of talk about freedom among
you Americans; and it just means nothing at all。' You should
have seen Faulkner! He turned on him like a tornado。 ‘How
should you know anything about freedom; Mc