what diantha did-第33章
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Harvey。 I will succeed。 I am succeeding。〃
She kept well； she worked hard； she was more than glad to have her
mother with her； but she wanted something else； which seemed farther off
than ever。 Her lover's picture hung on the wall of her bedroom； stood
on her bureau； and （but this was a secret） a small one was carried in
her bosom。
Rather a grim looking young woman； Diantha； with the cares of the world
of house…keepers upon her proud young shoulders； with all the stirring
hopes to be kept within bounds； all the skulking fears to be resisted；
and the growing burden of a large affair to be carried steadily。
But when she woke； in the brilliant California mornings； she would lie
still a few moments looking at the face on the wall and the face on the
bureau； would draw the little picture out from under her pillow and kiss
it； would say to herself for the thousandth time； 〃It is for him； too。〃
She missed him； always。
The very vigor of her general attitude； the continued strength with
which she met the days and carried them； made it all the more needful
for her to have some one with whom she could forget every care； every
purpose； every effort； some one who would put strong arms around her and
call her 〃Little Girl。〃 His letters were both a comfort and a pain。 He
was loyal； kind； loving； but always that wall of disapproval。 He loved
her； he did not love her work。
She read them over and over； hunting anew for the tender phrases； the
things which seemed most to feed and comfort her。 She suffered not only
from her loneliness； but from his； and most keenly from his sternly
suppressed longing for freedom and the work that belonged to him。
〃Why can't he see；〃 she would say to herself； 〃that if this succeeds； he
can do his work； that I can make it possible for him？ And he won't let
me。 He won't take it from me。 Why are men so proud？ Is there anything
so ignominious about a woman that it is disgraceful to let one help you？
And why can't he think at all about the others？ It's not just us； it's
all people。 If this works； men will have easier times； as well as
women。 Everybody can do their real work better with this old primitive
business once set right。〃
And then it was always time to get up； or time to go to bed； or time to
attend to some of the numberless details of her affairs。
She and her mother had an early lunch before the caffeteria opened； and
were glad of the afternoon tea； often held in a retired corner of the
broad piazza。 She sat there one hot； dusty afternoon； alone and
unusually tired。 The asphalted street was glaring and noisy； the cross
street deep in soft dust； for months unwet。
Failure had not discouraged her； but increasing success with all its
stimulus and satisfaction called for more and more power。 Her mind was
busy foreseeing； arranging； providing for emergencies； and then the
whole thing slipped away from her； she dropped her head upon her arm for
a moment； on the edge of the tea table； and wished for Ross。
From down the street and up the street at this moment； two men were
coming； both young； both tall； both good looking； both apparently
approaching Union House。 One of them was the nearer； and his foot soon
sounded on the wooden step。 The other stopped and looked in a shop
window。
Diantha started up； came forward；it was Mr。 Eltwood。 She had a vague
sense of disappointment； but received him cordially。 He stood there；
his hat off； holding her hand for a long moment； and gazing at her with
evident admiration。 They turned and sat down in the shadow of the
reed…curtained corner。
The man at the shop window turned； too； and went away。
Mr。 Eltwood had been a warm friend and cordial supporter from the epoch
of the Club…splitting speech。 He had helped materially in the slow；
up…hill days of the girl's effort； with faith and kind words。 He had
met the mother's coming with most friendly advances； and Mrs。 Bell found
herself much at home in his liberal little church。
Diantha had grown to like and trust him much。
〃What's this about the new house； Miss Bell？ Your mother says I may
know。〃
〃Why not？〃 she said。 〃You have followed this thing from the first。
Sugar or lemon？ You see I want to disentangle the undertakings； set
them upon their own separate feet； and establish the practical working
of each one。〃
〃I see；〃 he said； 〃and 'day service' is not 'cooked food delivery。'〃
〃Nor yet 'rooms for entertainment；' she agreed。 〃We've got them all
labelled； mother and I。 There's the 'd。 s。' and 'c。 f。 d。' and 'r。 f。
e。' and the 'p。 p。' That's picnics and parties。 And more coming。〃
〃What； more yet？ You'll kill yourself； Miss Bell。 Don't go too fast。
You are doing a great work for humanity。 Why not take a little more
time？〃
〃I want to do it as quickly as I can； for reasons；〃 answered Diantha。
Mr。 Eltwood looked at her with tender understanding。 〃I don't want to
intrude any further than you are willing to want me；〃 he said； 〃but
sometimes I think that even youstrong as you arewould be better for
some help。〃
She did not contradict him。 Her hands were in her lap； her eyes on the
worn boards of the piazza floor。 She did not see a man pass on the
other side of the street； cast a searching glance across and walk
quickly on again。
〃If you were quite free to go on with your beautiful work；〃 said Mr。
Eltwood slowly； 〃if you were offered heartiest appreciation； profound
respect； as well as love； of course； would you object to marrying； Miss
Bell？〃 asked in an even voice； as if it were a matter of metaphysical
inquiry。 Mrs。 Porne had told him of her theory as to a lover in the
home town； wishing to save him a long heart ache； but he was not sure of
it； and he wanted to be。
Diantha glanced quickly at him； and felt the emotion under his quiet
words。 She withdrew her eyes； looking quite the other way。
〃You are enough of a friend to know； Mr。 Eltwood；〃 she said； 〃I rather
thought you did know。 I am engaged。〃
〃Thank you for telling me； some one is greatly to be congratulated；〃 he
spoke sincerely； and talked quietly on about less personal matters；
holding his tea untasted till it was cold。
〃Do let me give you some that is hot；〃 she said at last； 〃and let me
thank you from my heart for the help and strength and comfort you have
been to me； Mr。 Eltwood。〃
〃I'm very glad；〃 he said； and again； 〃I am very glad。〃 〃You may count
upon anything I can do for you； always；〃 he continued。 〃I am proud to
be your friend。〃
He held her hand once more for a moment； and went away with his head up
and a firm step。 To one who watched him go； he had almost a triumphant
air； but it was not triumph； only the brave beginning of a hard fight
and a long one。
Then came Mrs。 Bell； returned from a shopping trip； and sank down in a
wicker rocker； glad of the shade and a cup of tea。 No； she didn't want
it iced。 〃Hot tea makes you cooler；〃 was her theory。
〃You don't look very tired；〃 said the girl。 〃Seems to me you get
stronger all the time。〃
〃I do；〃 said her mother。 〃You don't realize； you can't realize；
Diantha； what this means to me。 Of course to you I am an old woman； a
back numberone has to feel so about one's mother。 I did when I
married； and my mother then was five years younger than I am now。〃
〃I don't think you old； mother； not a bit of it。 You ought to have
twenty or thirty years of life before you； real life。〃
〃That's just what I'm feeling；〃 said Mrs。 Bell； 〃as if I'd just begun to
live！ This is so _different！_ There is a big； moving thing to work
for。 There iswhy Diantha； you wouldn't believe what a comfort it is
to me to feel that my work here isreallyadding to the profits！〃
Diantha laughed aloud。
〃You dear old darling；〃 she said； 〃I should think it was！ It is
_making_ the profits。〃
〃And it grows so；〃 her mother went on。 〃Here's this part so well
assured that you're setting up the new Union House！ Are you _sure_
about Mrs。 Jessup； dear？〃
〃As sure as I can be of any one till I've tried a long time。 She has
done all I've asked her to here； and done it well。 Besides； I mean to
keep a hand on it for a year or two yetI can't affor
