the daisy chain, or aspirations-第14章

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of　my　head；　and　think　what　is　to　come　next　in　doing；　and　pleasing
papa；　and　learning。〃

〃That's　grown　horrid；〃　said　Norman。　　〃There's　no　pleasure　in　getting
on；　nor　in　anything。〃

〃Don't　you　care　for　papa　and　all　of　us　being　glad；　Norman？〃　　As
Norman　could　not　just　then　say　that　he　did；　he　would　not　answer。

〃I　wish〃　said　Ethel；　disappointed；　but　cheering　up　the　next　minute。
〃I　do　believe　it　is　having　nothing　to　do。　　You　will　be　better　when
you　get　back　to　school　on　Monday。〃

〃That　is　worst　of　all！〃

〃You　don't　like　going　among　the　boys　again？　　But　that　must　be　done
some　time　or　other。　　Or　shall　I　get　Richard　to　speak　to　Dr。　Hoxton　to
let　you　have　another　week's　leave？〃

〃No；　no；　don't　be　foolish。　　It　can't　be　helped。〃

〃I　am　very　sorry；　but　I　think　you　will　be　better　for　it。〃

She　almost　began　to　fancy　herself　unfeeling；　when　she　found　him　so
much　more　depressed　than　she　was　herself；　and　unable　to　feel　it　a
relief　to　know　that　the　time　of　rest　and　want　of　occupation　was　over。
She　thought　it　light…minded；　though　she　could　not　help　it；　to　look
forward　to　the　daily　studies　where　she　might　lose　her　sad　thoughts
and　be　as　if　everything　were　as　usual。　　But　suppose　she　should　be　to
blame；　where　would　now　be　the　gentle　discipline？　　Poor　Ethel's
feelings　were　not　such　as　to　deserve　the　imputation　of　levity；　when
this　thought　came　over　her；　but　her　buoyant　mind；　always　seeking　for
consolation；　recurred　to　Margaret's　improvement；　and　she　fixed　her
hopes　on　her。

Margaret　was　more　alive　to　surrounding　objects；　and；　when　roused；　she
knew　them　all；　answered　clearly　when　addressed；　had　even；　more　than
once；　spoken　of　her　own　accord；　and　shown　solicitude　at　the　sight　of
her　father's　bandaged；　helpless　arm；　but　he　soon　soothed　this　away。
He　was　more　than　ever　watchful　over　her；　and　could　scarcely　be
persuaded　to　leave　her　for　one　moment；　in　his　anxiety　to　be　at　hand
to　answer；　when　first　she　should　speak　of　her　mother；　a　moment
apprehended　by　all　the　rest；　almost　as　much　for　his　sake　as　for　hers。

So　clear　had　her　perceptions　been；　and　so　much　more　awake　did　she
appear；　on　this　evening；　that　he　expected　the　inquiry　to　come　every
moment；　and　lingered　in　her　room；　till　she　asked　the　hour；　and　begged
him　to　go　to　bed。

As　he　bent　over　her；　she　looked　up　in　his　face；　and　said　softly；
〃Dear　papa。〃

There　was　that　in　her　tone　which　showed　she　perceived　the　truth；　and
he　knelt　by　her　side　kissing　her；　but　not　daring　to　relax　his
restraint　of　feeling。

〃Dear　papa；〃　she　said　again；　〃I　hope　I　shall　soon　be　better；　and　be
some　comfort　to　you。〃

〃My　bestmy　ownmy　comfort；〃　he　murmured；　all　he　could　say　without
giving　way。〃

〃Babyis　she　well？〃

〃Yes；　thank　Heaven；　she　has　not　suffered　at　all。〃

〃I　heard　her　this　morning；　I　must　see　her　to…morrow。　　But　don't　stay；
dear；　dear　papa；　it　is　late；　and　I　am　sure　you　are　not　at　all　well。
Your　armis　it　very　much　hurt？〃

〃It　is　nothing　you　need　think　about；　my　dear。　　I　am　much　better　than
I　could　have　imagined　possible。〃

〃And　you　have　been　nursing　me　all　the　time！　　Papa；　you　must　let　me
take　care　of　you　now。　　Do　pray　go　to　bed　at　once；　and　get　up　late。
Nurse　will　take　good　care　of　me。　　Good…night；　dear　papa。〃

When　Dr。　May　had　left　her；　and　tried　to　tell　Richard　how　it　had　been；
the　tears　cut　him　short；　and　had　their　free　course；　but　there　was
much　of　thankfulness；　for　it　might　be　looked　on　as　the　restoration　of
his　daughter；　the　worst　was　over；　and　the　next　day　he　was　able　to
think　of　other　things；　had　more　attention　to　spare　for　the　rest；　and
when　the　surgeon　came；　took　some　professional　interest　in　the
condition　of　his　own　arm；　inquired　after　his　patients；　and　even
talked　of　visiting　them。

In　the　meantime；　Margaret　sent　for　her　eldest　brother；　begging　him　to
tell　her　the　whole；　and　it　was　heard　as　calmly　and　firmly　as　it　was
told。　　Her　bodily　state　lulled　her　mind；　and　besides　it　was　not　new；
she　had　observed　much　while　her　faculties　were　still　too　much
benumbed　for　her　to　understand　all；　or　to　express　her　feelings。　　Her
thoughts　seemed　chiefly　occupied　with　her　father。　　She　made　Richard
explain　to　her　the　injury　he　had　suffered；　and　begged　to　know　whether
his　constant　attendance　on　her　could　do　him　harm。　　She　was　much
rejoiced　when　her　brother　assured　her　that　nothing　could　be　better
for　him；　and　she　began　to　say；　with　a　smile；　that　very　likely　her
being　hurt　had　been　fortunate。　　She　asked　who　had　taken　care　of　him
before　Richard's　arrival；　and　was　pleased　to　hear　that　it　was　Mr。
Ernescliffe。　　A　visit　from　the　little　Gertrude　Margaret　was　happily
accomplished；　and；　on　the　whole；　the　day　was　most　satisfactoryshe
herself　declaring　that　she　could　not　see　that　there　was　anything　the
matter　with　her；　except　that　she　felt　lazy；　and　did　not　seem　able　to
move。

Thus　the　next　Sunday　morning　dawned　with　more　cheerfulness。　Dr。　May
came　downstairs　for　the　first　time；　in　order　to　go　to　church　with　his
whole　flock；　except　the　two　Margarets。　　He　looked　very　wan　and
shattered；　but　they　clustered　gladly　round　him；　when　he　once　more
stood　among　them；　little　Blanche　securing　his　hand；　and　nodding
triumphantly　to　Mr。　Ernescliffe；　as　much　as　to　say；　〃Now　I　have　him；
I　don't　want　you。〃

Norman　alone　was　missing；　but　he　was　in　his　place　at　church　among　the
boys。　　Again；　in　returning；　he　slipped　out　of　the　party；　and　was　at
home　the　first；　and　when　this　recurred　in　the　afternoon　Ethel　began
to　understand　his　motive。　　The　High　Street　led　past　the　spot　where
the　accident　had　taken　place；　though　neither　she　nor　any　of　the
others　knew　exactly　where　it　was；　except　Norman；　on　whose　mind　the
scene　was　branded　indelibly；　she　guessed　that　it　was　to　avoid　it　that
he　went　along　what　was　called　Randall's　Alley；　his　usual　short　cut　to
school。

The　Sunday　brought　back　to　the　children　that　there　was　no　one　to　hear
their　hymns；　but　Richard　was　a　great　comfort；　watching　over　the
little　ones　more　like　a　sister　than　a　brother。　　Ethel　was　ashamed　of
herself　when　she　saw　him　taking　thought　for　them；　tying　Blanche's
bonnet；　putting　Aubrey's　gloves　on；　teaching　them　to　put　away　their
Sunday　toys；　as　if　he　meant　them　to　be　as　neat　and　precise　as
himself。

Dr。　May　did　not　encounter　the　family　dinner；　nor　attempt　a　second
going　to　church；　but　Blanche　was　very　glorious　as　she　led　him　down　to
drink　tea；　and；　before　going　up　again；　he　had　a　conversation　with
Alan　Ernescliffe；　who　felt　himself　obliged　to　leave　Stoneborough
early　on　the　morrow。

〃I　can　endure　better　to　go　now；〃　said　he；　〃and　I　shall　hear　of　you
often；　Hector　will　let　me　know；　and　Richard　has　promised　to　write。〃

〃Ay；　you　must　let　us　often　have　a　line。　　I　should　guess　you　were　a
letter…writing　man。〃

〃I　have　hitherto　had　too　few　friends　who　cared　to　hear　of　me　to　write
much；　but　the　pleasure　of　knowing　that　any　interest　is　taken　in　me
here〃

〃Well；〃　said　the　doctor；　〃mind　that　a　letter　will　always　be　welcome；
and　when　you　are　coming　southwards；　here　are　your　old　quarters。　　We
cannot　lose　sight　of　you　anyway；　especially〃and　his　voice　quivered…
…〃after　the　help　you　gave　my　poor　boys　and　girls　in　their　distress。〃

〃It　would　be　the　utmost　satisfaction　to　think　I　had　been　of　the
smallest　use；〃　said　Alan；　hiding　much　under　these　commonplace　words。

〃More　than　I　know；〃　said　Dr。　May；　〃too　much　to　speak　of。　　Well；　we
shall　see　you　again；　though　it　is　a　changed　place；　and　you　must　come
and　see　your　god…daughterpoor　childmay　she　only　be　brought　up　as
her　sisters　were！　　They　will　do　their　best；　poor　things；　and　so　must
I；　but　it　is　sad　work！〃

Both　were　too　much　overcome　for　words；　but　the　doctor　was　the　first
to　continue；　as　he　took　off　his　dimmed　spectacles。　　He　seemed　to　wish
to　excuse　himself　for　giving　way；　saying；　with　a　look　that　would　fain
have　been　a　smile；　〃The　world　has　run　so　light　and　easy　with　me
hitherto；　that　you　see　I　don't　know　how　to　bear　with　trouble。　　All
thinking　and　managing　fell　to　my　Maggie's　share；　and　I　had　as　little
care　on　my　hands　as　one　of　my　own　boyspoor　fellows。　　I　don't　know
how　it　is　to　turn　out；　but　of　all　the　men　on　earth　to　be　left　with
eleven　children；　I　should　choose　myself　as　the　worst。〃

Alan　tried　to　say　some