the daisy chain, or aspirations-第105章

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Robinson　Crusoe's　desert　island！〃

〃It　is　not　come　to　that　yet；〃　said　Margaret；　〃but　about　the　fancy
fair。　　We　all　know　that　the　school　is　very　much　wanted。〃

〃Yes；　but　I　hoped　to　wait　in　patience　and　perseverance；　and　do　it　at
last。〃

〃All　yourself？〃

〃Now；　Margaret！　you　know　I　was　glad　of　Alan's　help。〃

〃I　should　think　so！〃　said　Margaret。　〃You　need　not　make　a　favour　of
that！〃

〃Yes；　but；　don't　you　see；　that　came　as　almsgiving；　in　the　way　which
brings　a　blessing。　　We　want　nothing　to　make　us　give　money　and　work　to
Cocksmoor。　　We　do　all　we　can　already；　and　I　don't　want　to　get　a　fine
bag　or　a　ridiculous　pincushion　in　exchange！〃

〃Not　you；　but〃

〃Well；　for　the　rest。　　If　they　like　to　offer　their　money；　well　and
good；　the　better　for　them；　but　why　must　they　not　give　it　to
Cocksmoorbut　for　that　unnatural　butterfly　of　Blanche's；　with　black
pins　for　horns；　that　they　will　go　and　sell　at　an　extortionate　rate。〃

〃The　price　will　be　given　for　Cocksmoor's　sake！〃

〃Pooh！　Margaret。　　Do　you　think　it　is　for　Cocksmoor's　sake　that　Lady
Leonora　Langdale　and　her　fine　daughter　come　down　from　London？　　Would
Mrs。　Hoxton　spend　the　time　in　making　frocks　for　Cocksmoor　children
that　she　does　in　cutting　out　paper；　and　stuffing　glass　bottles　with
it？　　Let　people　be　honestalms；　or　pleasure；　or　vanity！　let　them　say
which　they　mean；　but　don't　make　charity　the　excuse　for　the　others；
and；　above　all；　don't　make　my　poor　Cocksmoor　the　victim　of　it。〃

〃This　is　very　severe；〃　said　Margaret；　pausing；　almost　confounded。
〃Do　you　think　no　charity　worth　having　but　what　is　given　on　unmixed
motives？　　Who；　then；　could　give？〃

〃Margaretwe　see　much　evil　arise　in　the　best…planned　institutions；
nay；　in　what　are　not　human。　　Don't　you　think　we　ought　to　do　our
utmost　to　have　no　flaw　in　the　foundation？　　Schools　are　not　such
perfect　places　that　we　can　build　them　without　fear；　and；　if　the　means
are　to　be　raised　by　a　bargain　for　amusementif　they　are　to　come　from
frivolity　instead　of　self…denial；　I　am　afraid　of　them。　　I　do　not　mean
that　Cocksmoor　has　not　been　the　joy　of　my　life；　and　of　Mary's；　but
that　was　not　because　we　did　it　for　pleasure。〃

〃No！〃　said　Margaret；　sighing；　〃you　found　pleasure　by　the　way。　　But
why　did　you　not　say　all　this　to　Flora？〃

〃It　is　of　no　use　to　talk　to　Flora；〃　said　Ethel；　〃she　would　say　it　was
high…flown　and　visionary。　　Oh！　she　wants　it　for　the　bazaar's　own
sake；　and　that　is　one　reason　why　I　hate　it。〃

〃Now；　Ethel！〃

〃I　do　believe　it　was　very　unfortunate　for　Flora　that　the　Hoxtons　took
to　patronising　her；　because　Norman　would　not　be　patronised。　　Ever
since　it　began；　her　mind　has　been　full　of　visitings；　and　parties；　and
county　families；　and　she　has　left　off　the　home　usefulness　she　used　to
care　about。〃

〃But　you　are　old　enough　for　that；〃　said　Margaret。　　〃It　would　be　hard
to　keep　Flora　at　home；　now　that　you　can　take　her　place；　and　do　not
care　for　going　out。　　One　of　us　must　be　the　representative　Miss　May；
you　know；　and　keep　up　the　civilities；　and　you　may　think　yourself
lucky　it　is　not　you。〃

〃If　it　was　only　that；　I　should　not　care；　but　I　may　as　well　tell　you；
Margaret；　for　it　is　a　weight　to　me。　　It　is　not　the　mere　pleasure　in
gaietiesFlora　cares　for　them；　in　themselves；　as　little　as　I　donor
is　it　neighbourliness；　as　a　duty　to　others；　for；　you　may　observe；　she
always　gets　off　any　engagement　to　the　Wards；　or　any　of　the　town　folk；
to　whom　it　would　be　a　gratification　to　have　hershe　either　eludes
them；　or　sends　me。　　The　thing　is；　that　she　is　always　trying　to　be
with　the　great　people；　the　county　set；　and　I　don't　think　that　is　the
safe　way　of　going　on。〃

Margaret　mused　sadly。　　〃You　frighten　me；　Ethel！　　I　cannot　say　it　is
not　so；　and　these　are　so　like　the　latent　faults　that　dear　mamma's
letter　spoke　of〃

Ethel　sat　meditating；　and　at　last　said；　〃I　wish　I　had　not　told　you！
I　don't　always　believe　it　myself；　and　it　is　so　unkind；　and　you　will
make　yourself　unhappy　too。　　I　ought　not　to　have　thought　it　of　her！
Think　of　her　ever…ready　kindness　and　helpfulness；　her　pretty
courteous　ways　to　the　very　least；　her　obligingness　and　tact！〃

〃Yes；〃　said　Margaret；　〃she　is　one　of　the　kindest　people　there　is；　and
I　am　sure　that　she　thought　the　gaining　funds　for　Cocksmoor　was　the
best　thing　to　be　done；　that　you　would　be　pleased；　and　a　great　deal　of
pleasant　occupation　provided　for　us　all。〃

〃That　is　the　bright　side；　the　surface　side；〃　said　Ethel。

〃And　not　an　untrue　one；〃　said　Margaret；　〃Meta　will　not　be　vain；　and
will　work　the　more　happily　for　Cocksmoor's　sake。　　Mary　and　Blanche；
poor　Mrs。　Boulder；　and　many　good　ladies　who　hitherto　have　not　known
how　to　help　Cocksmoor；　will　do　so　now　with　a　good　will；　and　though　it
is　not　what　we　should　have　chosen；　I　think　we　had　better　take　it　in
good　part。〃

〃You　think　so？〃

〃Yes；　indeed　I　do。　　If　you　go　about　with　that　dismal　face　and　strong
disapproval；　it　will　really　seem　as　if　it　was　the　having　your
dominion　muddled　with　that　you　dislike。　　Besides；　it　is　putting
yourself　forward　to　censure　what　is　not　absolutely　wrong　in　itself；
and　that　cannot　be　desirable。〃

〃No；〃　said　Ethel；　〃but　I　cannot　help　being　sorry　for　Cocksmoor。　　I
thought　patience　would　prepare　the　way；　and　the　means　be　granted　in
good　time；　without　hastinessonly　earnestness。〃

〃You　had　made　a　picture　for　yourself；〃　said　Margaret　gently。　　〃Yes；
we　all　make　pictures　for　ourselves；　and　we　are　the　foremost　figures
in　them；　but　they　are　taken　out　of　our　hands；　and　we　see　others
putting　in　rude　touches；　and　spoiling　our　work；　as　it　seems；　but；　by…
and…by；　we　shall　see　that　it　is　all　guided。〃

Ethel　sighed。　　〃Then　having　protested　to　my　utmost　against　this
concern；　you　think　I　ought　to　be　amiable　about　it。〃

〃And　to　let　poor　Mary　enjoy　it。　　She　would　be　so　happy；　if　you　would
not　bewilder　her　by　your　gloomy　looks；　and　keep　her　to　the　hemming　of
your　endless　glazed　calico　bonnet　strings。〃

〃Poor　old　Mary！　　I　thought　that　was　by　her　own　desire。〃

〃Only　her　dutiful　allegiance　to　you；　and；　as　making　pincushions　is
nearly　her　greatest　delight；　it　is　cruel　to　make　her　think　it；　in
some　mysterious　way；　wrong　and　displeasing　to　you。〃

Ethel　laughed；　and　said；　〃I　did　not　think　Mary　was　in　such　awe　of　me。
I'll　set　her　free；　then。　　But；　Margaret；　do　you　really　think　I　ought
to　give　up　my　time　to　it？〃

〃Could　you　not　just　let　them　have　a　few　drawings；　or　a　little　bit　of
your　company　workjust　enough　for　you　not　to　annoy　every　one；　and
seem　to　be　testifying　against　them？　　You　would　not　like　to　vex　Meta。〃

〃It　will　go　hard；　if　I　do　not　tell　Meta　my　mind。　　I　cannot　bear　to
see　her　deluded。〃

〃I　don't　think　she　is；〃　said　Margaret；　〃but　she　does　not　set　her　face
against　what　others　wish。　　As　papa　says　of　his　dear　little　humming…
bird；　she　takes　the　honey；　and　leaves　the　poison。〃

〃Yes；　amid　all　that　enjoyment；　she　is　always　choosing　the　good；　and
leaving　the　evil；　always　sacrificing　something；　and　then　being　happy
in　the　sacrifice！〃

〃No　one　would　guess　it　was　a　sacrifice；　it　is　so　joyously　doneleast
of　all　Meta　herself。〃

〃Her　coming　home　from　London　was　exactly　a　specimen　of　that
sacrificeand　no　sacrifice；〃　said　Ethel。

〃What　was　that？〃　said　Norman；　who　had　come　up　to　the　window
unobserved；　and　had　been　listening　to　their　few　last　sentences。

〃Did　not　you　hear　of　it？　　It　was　a　sort　of　material　turning　away　from
vanity　that　made　me　respect　the　little　rival　Daisy；　as　much　as　I
always　admired　her。

〃Tell　me；〃　said　Norman。　　〃When　was　it？〃

〃Last　spring。　　You　know　Mr。　Rivers　is　always　ill　in　London：　indeed；
papa　says　it　would　be　the　death　of　him；　but　Lady　Leonora　Langdale
thinks　it　dreadful　that　Meta　should　not　go　to　all　the　gaieties；　and
last　year；　when　Mrs。　Larpent　was　gone；　she　insisted　on　her　coming　to
stay　with　her　for　the　season。　　Now　Meta　thought　it　wrong　to　leave　her
father　alone；　and　wanted　not　to　have　gone　at　all；　but；　to　my
surprise；　Margaret　advised　her　to　yield；　and　go　for　some　short　fixed
time。〃

〃Yes；〃　said　Margaret；　〃as　all　her　elders　thought　it　right；　I　did　not
think　we　could　advise　her　to　refuse　absolutely。　　Besides；　it　was　a
promise。〃

〃She　declared　she　would　only　stay　three　weeks；　and　the　Langdales　were
satisfied；　thinking　that