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account in the smallest items察and to post it publicly on the most 

trival occasions。 

    ^My friends察院says Chadband察 eightpence is not much察it might 

justly have been one and fourpence此it might justly have been half´ 

a´crown。 O let us be joyful察joyful O let us be joyful 院

    With   which   remark察  which   appears   from   its   sound          to   be  an 

extract     in  verse察  Mr   Chadband       stalks   to  the   table察 and    before 

taking a chair察lifts up his admonitory hand。 

    ^My   friends察院  says   he察   what   is   this   which   we   now   behold   as 

being   spread   before   us拭  Refreshment。   Do   we   need   refreshment 

then察  my  friends拭 We do。   And  why   do   we   need   refreshment察  my 

friends拭  Because   we   are   but   mortal察  because   we   are   but   sinful察

because we are but of the earth察because we are not of the air。 Can 

we fly察my friends拭We cannot。 Why can we not fly察my friends拭院

    Mr     Snagsby察    presuming       on   the   success     of  his   last  point察

ventures   to   observe   in   a   cheerful   and   rather   knowing   tone察   No 

wings。 ̄ But察is immediately frowned down by Mrs Snagsby。 

    ^I say察my friends察院pursues Mr Chadband察utterly rejecting and 

obliterating  Mr  Snagsby¨s   suggestion察  Why  can   we not   fly拭  Is   it 

because      we   are   calculated     to  walk拭   It  is。  Could   we    walk察  my 

friends察    without    strength拭    We    could    not。  What     should    we    do 

without   strength察  my   friends拭  Our   legs   would   refuse   to   bear   us察



Charles Dickens                                                      ElecBook Classics 


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                                    Bleak House                                     369 



our  knees   would   double   up察  our  ankles   would   turn   over察  and   we 

should   come   to  the   ground。   Then   from   whence察  my   friends察  in   a 

human point of view察do we derive the strength that is necessary 

to our limbs拭Is it察院says Chadband察glancing over the table察 from 

bread   in   various   forms察  from   butter   which   is   churned   from   the 

milk which is yielded untoe us by the cow察from the eggs which are 

laid by the fowl察from ham察from tongue察from sausage察and from 

such like拭It is。 Then let us partake of the good things which are 

set before us 院

    The persecutors denied that there was any particular gift in Mr 

Chadband¨s piling verbose flights of stairs察one upon another察after 

this   fashion。    But   this   can   only   be  received   as    a  proof    of  their 

determination   to   persecute察  since   it   must   be   within   everybody¨s 

experience察that the Chadband style of oratory is widely received 

and much admired。 

    Mr Chadband察however察having concluded for the present察sits 

down   at   Mrs   Snagsby¨s   table察  and   lays   about   him   prodigiously。 

The   conversion   of   nutriment   of   any   sort   into   oil   of   the    quality 

already   mentioned察  appears   to   be   a   process   so   inseparable   from 

the constitution of this exemplary vessel察that in beginning to eat 

and   drink察  he   may   be   described   as   always   becoming   a   kind   of 

considerable Oil Mills察or other large factory for the production of 

that article   on  a   wholesome   scale。   On   the   present  evening  of   the 

long   vacation察  in   Cook¨s   Court察  Cursitor   Street察  he   does   such   a 

powerful   stroke       of  business察   that   the  warehouse       appears     to   be 

quite full when the works cease。 

    At   this   period    of  the  entertainment察      Guster察   who    has   never 

recovered       her   first  failure察  but    has   neglected      no   possible    or 

impossible   means   of  bringing   the   establishment   and   herself   into 



Charles Dickens                                                       ElecBook Classics 


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                                  Bleak House                                  370 



contempt!among            which      may     be   briefly    enumerated        her 

unexpectedly        performing       clashing     military     music     on    Mr 

Chadband¨s        head    with   plates察  and   afterwards      crowning     that 

gentleman   with   muffins!at   which   period   of   the   entertainment察

Guster whispers Mr Snagsby that he is wanted。 

    ^And being wanted in the!not to put too fine a point upon it! 

in the shop 院says Mr Snagsby rising察 perhaps this good company 

will excuse me for half a minute。 ̄ 

   Mr     Snagsby    descends察    and   finds  the   two   ¨prentices   intently 

contemplating a police constable察who holds a   ragged boy  by  the 

arm。 

    ^Why察bless my heart察院says Mr Snagsby察 what¨s the matter 院

    ^This   boy察院  says   the   constable察   although   he¨s   repeatedly   told 

to察won¨t move on! ̄ 

    ^I¨m   always   a´moving   on察  sir察院  cries   the   boy察  wiping   away   his 

grimy     tears  with   his   arm。   ^I¨ve  always    been    a  moving    and   a 

moving on察ever since I was born。 Where can   I  possible move   to察

sir察more nor I do move 院

    ^He   won¨t   move   on察院  says   the   constable察  calmly察  with   a   slight 

professional hitch of his neck involving its better settlement in his 

stiff   stock察  although     he   has   been    repeatedly     cautioned察   and 

therefore I am obliged to take him into custody。 He¨s as obstinate a 

young gonoph as I know。 He Won¨t move on。 ̄ 

    ^O my eye Where can I move to 院cries the boy察clutching quite 

desperately at his hair察and beating his bare feet upon the floor of 

Mr Snagsby¨s passage。 

    ^Don¨t   you   come   none   of   that察  or   I   shall   make   blessed   short 

work of you 院says the constable察giving him a passionless shake。 

^My instructions are察that you are to move on。 I have told you so 



Charles Dickens                                                   ElecBook Classics 


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                                  Bleak House                                    371 



five hundred times。 ̄ 

    ^But where拭院cries the boy。 

    ^Well Really察constable察you know察院says Mr Snagsby wistfully察

and  coughing behind   his   hand   his cough  of   great   perplexity   and 

doubt察 really that does seem a question。 Where察you know拭院

    ^My   instructions   don¨t   go   to   that察院  replies   the   constable。   ^My 

instructions are that this boy is to move on。 ̄ 

    Do you hear察Jo拭It is nothing to you or to any one else察that the 

great   lights   of   the  parliamentary   sky   have      failed  for  some    few 

years察in this business察to set you the example of moving on。 The 

one    grand    recipe   remains     for  you!the      profound     philosophical 

prescription!the be´all and the end´all of your strange existence 

upon earth。 Move on You are by no means to move off察Jo察for the 

great lights can¨t at all agree about that。 Move on 

    Mr    Snagsby     says   nothing    to  this  effect察 says   nothing    at  all察

indeed察     but   coughs     his   forlornest     cough察   expressive      of   no 

thoroughfare        in   any   direction。     By   this   time察   Mr    and    Mrs 

Chadband察       and    Mrs    Snagsby察    hearing     the    altercation察   have 

appeared upon the stairs。 Guster having never left the end of the 

passage察the whole household are assembled。 

    ^The simple question is察sir察院says the constable察 whether you 

know this boy。 He says you do。 ̄ 

    Mrs   Snagsby察  from   her   elevation察  instantly   cries   out察   No   he 

don¨t 院

    ^My lit´tle woman 院says Mr Snagsby察looking up the staircase。 

^My love察permit me Pray have a moment¨s patience察my dear。 I 

do know something of this lad

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