three men on the bummel(三个闲逛的人)-第25章
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weapon with which to soak Harris。 Of course; the result was that;
between them; they soused every dead and living thing within fifty yards;
except themselves。 One furious man; too drenched to care what more
happened to him; leapt into the arena and also took a hand。 The three
among them proceeded to sweep the compass with that hose。 They
pointed it to heaven; and the water descended upon the people in the form
of an equinoctial storm。 They pointed it downwards; and sent the water
in rushing streams that took people off their feet; or caught them about the
waist line; and doubled them up。
Not one of them would loosen his grip upon the hose; not one of them
thought to turn the water off。 You might have concluded they were
struggling with some primeval force of nature。 In forty…five seconds; so
George said; who was timing it; they had swept that circus bare of every
living thing except one dog; who; dripping like a water nymph; rolled over
by the force of water; now on this side; now on that; still gallantly
staggered again and again to its feet to bark defiance at what it evidently
regarded as the powers of hell let loose。
Men and women left their machines upon the ground; and flew into the
woods。 From behind every tree of importance peeped out wet; angry
heads。
At last; there arrived upon the scene one man of sense。 Braving all
things; he crept to the hydrant; where still stood the iron key; and screwed
it down。 And then from forty trees began to creep more or less soaked
human beings; each one with something to say。
At first I fell to wondering whether a stretcher or a clothes basket
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would be the more useful for the conveyance of Harris's remains back to
the hotel。 I consider that George's promptness on that occasion saved
Harris's life。 Being dry; and therefore able to run quicker; he was there
before the crowd。 Harris was for explaining things; but George cut him
short。
〃You get on that;〃 said George; handing him his bicycle; 〃and go。 They
don't know we belong to you; and you may trust us implicitly not to reveal
the secret。 We'll hang about behind; and get in their way。 Ride zig…zag
in case they shoot。〃
I wish this book to be a strict record of fact; unmarred by exaggeration;
and therefore I have shown my description of this incident to Harris; lest
anything beyond bald narrative may have crept into it。 Harris maintains
it is exaggerated; but admits that one or two people may have been
〃sprinkled。〃 I have offered to turn a street hose on him at a distance of
five…and…twenty yards; and take his opinion afterwards; as to whether
〃sprinkled〃 is the adequate term; but he has declined the test。 Again; he
insists there could not have been more than half a dozen people; at the
outside; involved in the catastrophe; that forty is a ridiculous misstatement。
I have offered to return with him to Hanover and make strict inquiry into
the matter; and this offer he has likewise declined。 Under these
circumstances; I maintain that mine is a true and restrained narrative of an
event that is; by a certain number of Hanoverians; remembered with
bitterness unto this very day。
We left Hanover that same evening; and arrived at Berlin in time for
supper and an evening stroll。 Berlin is a disappointing town; its centre
over…crowded; its outlying parts lifeless; its one famous street; Unter den
Linden; an attempt to combine Oxford Street with the Champs Elysee;
singularly unimposing; being much too wide for its size; its theatres dainty
and charming; where acting is considered of more importance than
scenery or dress; where long runs are unknown; successful pieces being
played again and again; but never consecutively; so that for a week
running you may go to the same Berlin theatre; and see a fresh play every
night; its opera house unworthy of it; its two music halls; with an
unnecessary suggestion of vulgarity and commonness about them; ill…
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arranged and much too large for comfort。 In the Berlin cafes and
restaurants; the busy time is from midnight on till three。 Yet most of the
people who frequent them are up again at seven。 Either the Berliner has
solved the great problem of modern life; how to do without sleep; or; with
Carlyle; he must be looking forward to eternity。
Personally; I know of no other town where such late hours are the
vogue; except St。 Petersburg。 But your St。 Petersburger does not get up
early in the morning。 At St。 Petersburg; the music halls; which it is the
fashionable thing to attend AFTER the theatrea drive to them taking half
an hour in a swift sleighdo not practically begin till twelve。 Through
the Neva at four o'clock in the morning you have to literally push your
way; and the favourite trains for travellers are those starting about five
o'clock in the morning。 These trains save the Russian the trouble of
getting up early。 He wishes his friends 〃Good…night;〃 and drives down to
the station comfortably after supper; without putting the house to any
inconvenience。
Potsdam; the Versailles to Berlin; is a beautiful little town; situate
among lakes and woods。 Here in the shady ways of its quiet; far…
stretching park of Sans Souci; it is easy to imagine lean; snuffy Frederick
〃bummeling〃 with shrill Voltaire。
Acting on my advice; George and Harris consented not to stay long in
Berlin; but to push on to Dresden。 Most that Berlin has to show can be
seen better elsewhere; and we decided to be content with a drive through
the town。 The hotel porter introduced us to a droschke driver; under
whose guidance; so he assured us; we should see everything worth seeing
in the shortest possible time。 The man himself; who called for us at nine
o'clock in the morning; was all that could be desired。 He was bright;
intelligent; and well… informed; his German was easy to understand; and
he knew a little English with which to eke it out on occasion。 With the
man himself there was no fault to be found; but his horse was the most
unsympathetic brute I have ever sat behind。
He took a dislike to us the moment he saw us。 I was the first to come
out of the hotel。 He turned his head; and looked me up and down with a
cold; glassy eye; and then he looked across at another horse; a friend of his
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that was standing facing him。 I knew what he said。 He had an
expressive head; and he made no attempt to disguise his thought。
He said:
〃Funny things one does come across in the summer time; don't one?〃
George followed me out the nex