my memories of eighty years-第64章
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ous； and platitudinous speeches。 If they ever had possessed humor they were afraid of it。 The crowd； however； would invariably desert the statesman for the speaker who could give them amusement with instruction。 The elder statesmen said by way of advice： 〃While the people want to be amused； they have no faith in a man or woman with wit or anecdote。 When it comes to the election of men to conduct public affairs； they invariably prefer serious men。〃 There is no doubt that a reputation for wit has seriously impaired the prospects of many of the ablest men in the country。
The only exception to this rule was Abraham Lincoln。 But when he ran for president the first time he was comparatively unknown outside his State of Illinois。 The campaign managers in their literature put forward only his serious speeches； which were very remarkable； especially the one he delivered in Cooper Union； New York； which deeply impressed the thoughtful men of the East。 He could safely tell stories and jokes after he had demonstrated his greatness as president。 Then the people regarded his story…telling as the necessary relief and relaxation of an overburdened and overworked public servant。 But before he had demonstrated his genius as an executive； they would probably have regarded these same traits as evidences of frivolity； unfitting the possessor for great and grave responsibilities。
I had a very interesting talk on the subject with General Garfield； when he was running for president。 He very kindly said to me： 〃You have every qualification for success in public life； you might get anywhere and to the highest places except for your humor。 I know its great value to a speaker before an audience； but it is dangerous at the polls。 When I began in politics； soon after graduation； I found I had a keen sense of humor； and that made me the most sought…after of all our neighborhood speakers； but I also soon discovered it was seriously impairing the public opinion of me for responsible positions； so I decided to cut it out。 It was very difficult； but I have succeeded so thoroughly that I can no longer tell a story or appreciate the point of one when it is told to me。 Had I followed my natural bent I should not now be the candidate of my party for President of the United States。〃
The reason so few men are humorists is that they are very shy of humor。 My own observations in studying the lives and works of our public men demonstrate how thoroughly committed to this idea they have been。 There is not a joke； nor a mot； nor a scintilla of humor irradiating the Revolutionary statesmen。 There is a stilted dignity about their utterances which shows that they were always posing in heroic attitudes。 If they lived and moved in family； social； and club life； as we understand it； the gloom of their companionship accounts for the enjoyment which their contemporaries took in the three hours' sermons then common from the pulpit。
As we leave the period of Washington； Hamilton； Jefferson； and the Adamses； we find no humor in the next generation。 The only relief from the tedium of argument and exhaustless logic is found in the savage sarcasm of John Randolph； which was neither wit nor humor。
A witty illustration or an apt story will accomplish more than columns of argument。 The old…time audience demanded a speech of not less than two hours' duration and expected three。 The audience of to…day grows restive after the first hour； and is better pleased with forty minutes。 It prefers epigrams to arguments and humor to rhetoric。 It is still true； however； that the press presents to readers from a speaker who indulges in humor only the funny part of his effort； and he is in serious danger of receiving no credit for ability in the discussion of great questions； no matter how conspicuous that ability may be。 The question is always presented to a frequent speaker whether he shall win the applause of the audience and lose the flattering opinion of the critics； or bore his audience and be complimented by readers for wisdom。
When I look back over sixty…five years on the platform in public speaking； and the success of different methods before audiences； political； literary； business； or a legislative committee； or a legislature itself； and especially when I consider my own pleasure in the efforts； the results and compensations have been far greater than the attainment of any office。 For； after all； a man might be dull and a bore to himself and others for a lifetime and have the reputation of being a serious thinker and a solid citizen； and yet never reach the presidency。
It was always a delight to listen to George W。 Curtis。 He was a finished orator of the classic type； but not of the Demosthenian order。 His fine personal appearance； his well…modulated and far…reaching voice； and his refined manner at once won the favor of his audience。 He was a splendid type of the scholar in politics。 In preparing a speech he took as much pains as he did with a volume which he was about to publish。
I accepted under great pressure the invitation to deliver the oration at the unveiling of the Bartholdi Statue of Liberty in New York harbor； because the time was so short； only a few days。 Mr。 Curtis said to me afterwards： 〃I was very much surprised that you accepted that invitation。 I declined it because there was only a month left before the unveiling。 I invariably refuse an invitation for an important address unless I can have three months。 I take one month to look up authorities and carefully prepare it and then lay it on the shelf for a month。 During that period； while you are paying no attention to the matter； your mind is unconsciously at work upon it。 When you resume correcting your manuscript you find that in many things about which you thought well you have changed your mind。 Leisurely corrections and additions will perfect the address。〃
As my orations and speeches have always been the by…product of spare evenings and Sundays taken from an intensely active and busy life； if I had followed any of these examples my twelve volumes of speeches would never have seen the light of day。
One of the greatest orators of his generation； and I might say of ours； was Robert G。 Ingersoll。 I was privileged to meet Colonel Ingersoll many times； and on several occasions to be a speaker on the same platform。 The zenith of his fame was reached by his 〃plumed…knight〃 speech； nominating James G。 Blaine for president at the national Republican convention in 1876。 It was the testimony of all the delegates that if the vote could have been taken immediately at the conclusion of the speech； Mr。 Blaine would have been elected。
Colonel Ingersoll carried off the oratorical honors that campaign in a series of speeches； covering the whole country。 I say a series of speeches； he really had but one； which was the most effective campaign address I ever heard； but which he delivered over and over again； and every time with phenomenal success； a success the like of which I have never known。 He delivered it to an immense audience in New York； and swept them off their feet。 He repeated this triumph the next day at an open…air meeting in Wall Street； and again the next day at a great gathering in New Jersey。 The newspapers printed the speech in full every day after its delivery； as if it had been a new and first utterance of the great orator。
I spoke with him several times when he was one of the speakers after an important dinner。 It was a rare treat to hear him。 The effort apparently was impromptu； and that added to its effect upon his auditors。 That it was thoroughly prepared I found by hearing it several times； always unchanged and always producing the same thrilling effect。
He spoke one night at Cooper Institute at a celebration by the colored people of Mr。 Lincoln's proclamation emancipating them from slavery。 As usual he was master of the occasion and of his audience。 He was then delivering a series of addresses attacking the Bible。 His mind was full of that subject； and apparently he could not help assailing the faith of the negroes by asking； if there was a God of justice and mercy； why did he leave them so long in slavery or permit them ever to be slaves。
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