my memories of eighty years-第58章

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ng　in　all　history　was　your　rebellion　and　separation　from　the　best　government　on　earth。〃　　He　said　much　more　before　the　prince　could　stop　him。

Blaine；　with　that　grace　and　tact　for　which　he　was　so　famous；　smilingly　said：　　〃Well；　your　Grace；　if　George　III　had　had　the　sense；　tact；　and　winning　qualities　of　his　great…grandson；　our　host；　it　is　just　possible　that　we　might　now　be　a　self…governing　colony　in　the　British　Empire。〃

The　answer　relieved　the　situation　and　immensely　pleased　the　host。　Lord　Rosebery　once　said　in　a　speech　that；　with　the　tremendous　growth　in　every　element　of　greatness　of　the　United　States；　if　the　American　colonies　had　remained　in　the　British　Empire；　with　their　preponderating　influence　and　prestige；　the　capital　of　Great　Britain　might　have　been　moved　to　New　York　and　Buckingham　Palace　rebuilt　in　Central　Park。

At　another　dinner　one　of　the　guests　of　the　prince　suddenly　shot　at　me　across　the　table　the　startling　question：　　〃Do　you　know　certain　American　heiresses〃naming　them〃now　visiting　London？〃

I　answered　〃Yes〃naming　one　especially；　a　very　beautiful　and　accomplished　girl　who　was　quite　the　most　popular　debutante　of　the　London　season。

〃How　much　has　she？〃　he　asked。

I　named　the　millions　which　she　would　probably　inherit。　　〃But；〃　I　added；　〃before　you　marry　an　American　heiress；　you　better　be　sure　that　she　can　say　the　Lord's　Prayer。〃

He　said　with　great　indignation　that　he　would　be　astonished　if　any　American　girl　could　be　recognized　in　English　society　who　had　been　so　badly　brought　up　that　she　was　not　familiar　with　the　Lord's　Prayer。

〃All　of　them　are；〃　I　replied；　〃but　few　heiresses；　unless　they　have　come　into　their　inheritance　and　can　say　'Our　Father；　who　art　in　heaven；'　will　inherit　much；　because　American　fathers　are　very　speculative。〃

He　continued　to　express　his　astonishment　at　this　lack　of　religious　training　in　an　American　family；　while　the　prince　enjoyed　the　joke　so　much　that　I　was　fearful　in　his　convulsive　laughter　he　would　have　a　fit　of　apoplexy。

Once；　at　a　dinner　given　by　the　prince；　an　old　lady　of　very　high　rank　and　leading　position　said　suddenly　to　me；　and　in　a　way　which　aroused　the　attention　of　the　whole　company：　　〃Is　it　true　that　divorces　are　very　common　in　America？〃

I　knew　that　a　denial　by　me　would　not　convince　her　or　any　others　who　shared　in　this　belief；　then　very　common　in　Europe。　　Of　course；　the　prince　knew　better。　　I　saw　from　his　expression　that　he　wished　me　to　take　advantage　of　the　opportunity。　　I　made　up　my　mind　quickly　that　the　best　way　to　meet　this　belief　was　by　an　exaggeration　which　would　show　its　absurdity。

Having　once　started；　the　imaginative　situation　grew　beyond　my　anticipation。　　I　answered：　　〃Yes；　divorces　are　so　common　with　us　that　the　government　has　set　aside　one　of　our　forty…odd　States　for　this　special　purpose。　　It　is　the　principal　business　of　the　authorities。　Most　of　these　actions　for　divorce　take　place　at　the　capital；　which　is　always　crowded　with　great　numbers　of　people　from　all　parts　of　the　country　seeking　relief　from　their　marital　obligations。〃

〃Did　you　ever　visit　that　capital？〃　asked　the　prince。

〃Yes；　several　times；〃　I　answered；　〃but　not　for　divorce。　　My　domestic　relations　have　always　been　very　happy；　but　it　is　also　a　famous　health　resort；　and　I　went　there　for　the　cure。〃

〃Tell　us　about　your　visit；〃　said　the　prince。

〃Well；〃　I　continued；　〃it　was　out　of　season　when　I　was　first　there；　so　the　only　amusement　or　public　occasions　of　interest　were　prayer…meetings。〃

The　old　lady　asked　excitedly：　　〃Share　meetings？〃　　She　had　been　a　large　and　unfortunate　investor　in　American　stocks。

I　relieved　her　by　saying：　　〃No；　not　share　meetings；　but　religious　prayer…meetings。　　I　remember　one　evening　that　the　gentleman　who　sat　beside　me　turned　suddenly　to　his　wife　and　said：　　'We　must　get　out　of　here　at　once；　the　air　is　too　close。'　　'Why；　no；'　she　said；　'the　windows　are　all　open　and　the　breeze　is　fresh。'　　'Yes；'　he　quickly　remarked；　'but　next　to　you　are　your　two　predecessors　from　whom　I　was　divorced；　and　that　makes　the　air　too　close　for　me。'〃

The　old　lady　exclaimed：　　〃What　a　frightful　condition！〃

〃Tell　us　more；〃　said　the　prince。

〃Well；〃　I　continued；　〃one　day　the　mayor　of　the　city　invited　me　to　accompany　him　to　the　station；　as　the　divorce　train　was　about　to　arrive。　　I　found　at　the　station　a　judge　and　one　of　the　court　attendants。　　The　attendant　had　a　large　package　of　divorce　decrees　to　which　the　seal　of　the　court　had　been　attached；　and　also　the　signature　of　the　judge。　　They　only　required　to　have　the　name　of　the　party　desiring　divorce　inserted。　　Alongside　the　judge　stood　a　clergyman　of　the　Established　Church　in　full　robes　of　his　sacred　office。　　When　the　passengers　had　all　left　the　cars；　the　conductor　jumped　on　to　one　of　the　car　platforms　and　shouted　to　the　crowd：　'All　those　who　desire　divorce　will　go　before　the　judge　and　make　their　application。'

〃When　they　had　all　been　released　by　the　court　the　conductor　again　called　out：　　'All　those　who　have　been　accompanied　by　their　partners；　or　where　both　have　been　to…day　released　from　their　former　husbands　and　wives　to　be　remarried；　will　go　before　the　rector。'　　He　married　them　in　a　body；　whereupon　they　all　resumed　their　places　on　the　train。　　The　blowing　of　the　whistle　and　the　ringing　of　the　bell　on　the　locomotive　was　the　music　of　their　first；　second；　or　third　honeymoon　journey。〃

The　old　lady　threw　up　her　hands　in　horror　and　cried：　　〃Such　an　impious　civilization　must　come　speedily　not　only　to　spiritual　and　moral　destruction；　but　chaos。〃

Most　of　the　company　saw　what　an　amazing　caricature　the　whole　story　was　and　received　it　with　great　hilarity。　　The　effect　of　it　was　to　end；　for　that　circle；　at　least；　and　their　friends；　a　serious　discussion　of　the　universality　of　American　divorces。

The　prince　was　always　an　eager　sportsman　and　a　very　chivalric　one。　　At　the　time　of　one　of　the　races　at　Cowes　he　became　very　indignant　at　the　conduct　of　an　American　yachtsman　who　had　entered　his　boat。　　It　was　charged　by　the　other　competitors　that　this　American　yachtsman　violated　all　the　unwritten　laws　of　the　contest。

After　the　race　the　prince　said　to　me：　　〃A　yacht　is　a　gentleman's　home；　whether　it　is　racing　or　sailing　about　for　pleasure。　　The　owner　of　this　yacht；　to　make　her　lighter　and　give　her　a　better　chance；　removed　all　the　furniture　and　stripped　her　bare。　　He　even　went　so　far；　I　am　told；　that　when　he　found　the　steward　had　left　his　stateroom　a　tooth…brush；　he　threw　it　out　of　the　port　window。〃

It　will　be　seen　from　these　few　anecdotes　how　intensely　human　was　the　Prince　of　Wales。　　He　did　much　for　his　country；　both　as　prince　and　king；　and　filled　in　a　wise　and　able　way　the　functions　of　his　office。　　Certainly　no　official　did　quite　so　much　for　the　peace　of　Europe　during　his　time；　and　no　royalty　ever　did　more　to　make　the　throne　popular　with　the　people。　　I　heard　him　speak　at　both　formal　and　informal　occasions；　and　his　addresses　were　always　tactful　and　wise。

While　at　Homburg　we　used　to　enjoy　the　delightful　excursions　to　Nauheim；　the　famous　nerve…cure　place。　　I　met　there　at　one　time　a　peculiar　type　of　Americans；　quite　common　in　former　years。　　They　were　young　men　who；　having　inherited　fortunes　sufficient　for　their　needs；　had　no　ambitions。　　After　a　strenuous　social　life　at　home　and　in　Europe；　they　became　hypochondriacs　and　were　chasing　cures　for　their　imaginary　ills　from　one　resort　to　another。

One　of　them；　who　had　reached　middle　life；　had；　of　course；　become　in　his　own　opinion　a　confirmed　invalid。　　I　asked　him：　　〃What　brought　you　here？　　You　look　very　well。〃

〃That　is　just　my　trouble；〃　he　answered。　　〃I　look　very　well　and　so　get　no　sympathy；　but　my　nervous　system　is　so　out　of　order　that　it　only　takes　a　slight　shock　to　completely　disarrange　it。　　For　instance；　the　cause　of　my　present　trouble。　　I　was　dining　in　Paris　at　the　house　of　a　famous　hostess；　and　a　distinguished　company　was　present。　　The　only　three　Americans　were　two　ladies　and　myself。　I　was　placed　between　them。　　You　know　one　of　these　ladies；　while　a　great　leader　at　home；　uses　very　emphatic　language　when　she　is　irritated。　　The　dinner；　like　most　French　dinners；　with　many　courses；　was　unusually　long。　　Suddenly　this　lady；　leaning　over　me；　said　to　her　sister：　　'Damn　it；　Fan；　will　this　dinner　never　en