a room with a view-第48章

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！



more。　He　heard　her　in　silence；　and　then　said：　〃My　dear；　I　am

worried　about　you。　It　seems　to　me〃dreamily；　she　was　not

alarmed〃that　you　are　in　a　muddle。〃



She　shook　her　head。



〃Take　an　old　man's　word；　there's　nothing　worse　than　a　muddle　in

all　the　world。　It　is　easy　to　face　Death　and　Fate；　and　the　things

that　sound　so　dreadful。　It　is　on　my　muddles　that　I　look　back　with

horroron　the　things　that　I　might　have　avoided。　We　can　help　one

another　but　little。　I　used　to　think　I　could　teach　young　people

the　whole　of　life；　but　I　know　better　now；　and　all　my　teaching　of

George　has　come　down　to　this：　beware　of　muddle。　Do　you　remember

in　that　church；　when　you　pretended　to　be　annoyed　with　me　and

weren't？　Do　you　remember　before；　when　you　refused　the　room　with

the　view？　Those　were　muddleslittle；　but　ominousand　I　am

fearing　that　you　are　in　one　now。〃　She　was　silent。　〃Don't　trust

me；　Miss　Honeychurch。　Though　life　is　very　glorious；　it　is

difficult。〃　She　was　still　silent。　〃'Life'　wrote　a　friend　of　mine；

'is　a　public　performance　on　the　violin；　in　which　you　must　learn

the　instrument　as　you　go　along。'　I　think　he　puts　it　well。　Man　has

to　pick　up　the　use　of　his　functions　as　he　goes　alongespecially

the　function　of　Love。〃　Then　he　burst　out　excitedly；　〃That's　it；

that's　what　I　mean。　You　love　George！〃　And　after　his　long

preamble；　the　three　words　burst　against　Lucy　like　waves　from　the

open　sea。



〃But　you　do；〃　he　went　on；　not　waiting　for　contradiction。　〃You

love　the　boy　body　and　soul；　plainly；　directly；　as　he　loves　you；

and　no　other　word　expresses　it。　You　won't　marry　the　other　man　for

his　sake。〃



〃How　dare　you！〃　gasped　Lucy；　with　the　roaring　of　waters　in　her

ears。　〃Oh；　how　like　a　man！I　mean；　to　suppose　that　a　woman　is

always　thinking　about　a　man。〃



〃But　you　are。〃



She　summoned　physical　disgust。



〃You're　shocked；　but　I　mean　to　shock　you。　It's　the　only　hope　at

times。　I　can　reach　you　no　other　way。　You　must　marry；　or　your　life

will　be　wasted。　You　have　gone　too　far　to　retreat。　I　have　no　time

for　the　tenderness；　and　the　comradeship；　and　the　poetry；　and　the

things　that　really　matter；　and　for　which　you　marry。　I　know　that；

with　George；　you　will　find　them；　and　that　you　love　him。　Then　be

his　wife。　He　is　already　part　of　you。　Though　you　fly　to　Greece；

and　never　see　him　again；　or　forget　his　very　name；　George　will

work　in　your　thoughts　till　you　die。　It　isn't　possible　to　love　and

to　part。　You　will　wish　that　it　was。　You　can　transmute　love；

ignore　it；　muddle　it；　but　you　can　never　pull　it　out　of　you。　I

know　by　experience　that　the　poets　are　right：　love　is　eternal。〃



Lucy　began　to　cry　with　anger；　and　though　her　anger　passed　away

soon；　her　tears　remained。



〃I　only　wish　poets　would　say　this；　too：　love　is　of　the　body；　not

the　body；　but　of　the　body。　Ah！　the　misery　that　would　be　saved　if

we　confessed　that！　Ah！　for　a　little　directness　to　liberate　the

soul！　Your　soul；　dear　Lucy！　I　hate　the　word　now；　because　of　all

the　cant　with　which　superstition　has　wrapped　it　round。　But　we

have　souls。　I　cannot　say　how　they　came　nor　whither　they　go；　but

we　have　them；　and　I　see　you　ruining　yours。　I　cannot　bear　it。　It

is　again　the　darkness　creeping　in；　it　is　hell。〃　Then　he　checked

himself。　〃What　nonsense　I　have　talkedhow　abstract　and　remote！

And　I　have　made　you　cry！　Dear　girl；　forgive　my　prosiness；　marry

my　boy。　When　I　think　what　life　is；　and　how　seldom　love　is

answered　by　loveMarry　him；　it　is　one　of　the　moments　for　which

the　world　was　made。〃



She　could　not　understand　him；　the　words　were　indeed　remote。　Yet

as　he　spoke　the　darkness　was　withdrawn；　veil　after　veil；　and　she

saw　to　the　bottom　of　her　soul。



〃Then；　Lucy〃



〃You've　frightened　me；〃　she　moaned。　〃CecilMr。　Beebethe

ticket's　boughteverything。〃　She　fell　sobbing　into　the　chair。

〃I'm　caught　in　the　tangle。　I　must　suffer　and　grow　old　away　from

him。　I　cannot　break　the　whole　of　life　for　his　sake。　They　trusted

me。〃



A　carriage　drew　up　at　the　front…door。



〃Give　George　my　loveonce　only。　Tell　him　'muddle。'〃　Then　she

arranged　her　veil；　while　the　tears　poured　over　her　cheeks　inside。



〃Lucy〃



〃Nothey　are　in　the　halloh；　please　not；　Mr。　Emersonthey　trust

me〃



〃But　why　should　they；　when　you　have　deceived　them？〃



Mr。　Beebe　opened　the　door；　saying：　〃Here's　my　mother。〃



〃You're　not　worthy　of　their　trust。〃



〃What's　that？〃　said　Mr。　Beebe　sharply。



〃I　was　saying；　why　should　you　trust　her　when　she　deceived　you？〃



〃One　minute；　mother。〃　He　came　in　and　shut　the　door。



〃I　don't　follow　you；　Mr。　Emerson。　To　whom　do　you　refer？　Trust

whom？〃



〃I　mean　she　has　pretended　to　you　that　she　did　not　love　George。

They　have　loved　one　another　all　along。〃



Mr。　Beebe　looked　at　the　sobbing　girl。　He　was　very　quiet；　and　his

white　face；　with　its　ruddy　whiskers；　seemed　suddenly　inhuman。　A

long　black　column；　he　stood　and　awaited　her　reply。



〃I　shall　never　marry　him；〃　quavered　Lucy。



A　look　of　contempt　came　over　him；　and　he　said；　〃Why　not？〃



〃Mr。　BeebeI　have　misled　youI　have　misled　myself〃



〃Oh；　rubbish；　Miss　Honeychurch！〃



〃It　is　not　rubbish！〃　said　the　old　man　hotly。　〃It's　the　part　of

people　that　you　don't　understand。〃



Mr。　Beebe　laid　his　hand　on　the　old　man's　shoulder　pleasantly。



〃Lucy！　Lucy！〃　called　voices　from　the　carriage。



〃Mr。　Beebe；　could　you　help　me？〃



He　looked　amazed　at　the　request；　and　said　in　a　low；　stern　voice：

〃I　am　more　grieved　than　I　can　possibly　express。　It　is　lamentable；

lamentableincredible。〃



〃What's　wrong　with　the　boy？〃　fired　up　the　other　again。



〃Nothing；　Mr。　Emerson；　except　that　he　no　longer　interests　me。

Marry　George；　Miss　Honeychurch。　He　will　do　admirably。〃



He　walked　out　and　left　them。　They　heard　him　guiding　his　mother

up…stairs。



〃Lucy！〃　the　voices　called。



She　turned　to　Mr。　Emerson　in　despair。　But　his　face　revived　her。　It

was　the　face　of　a　saint　who　understood。



〃Now　it　is　all　dark。　Now　Beauty　and　Passion　seem　never　to　have

existed。　I　know。　But　remember　the　mountains　over　Florence　and　the

view。　Ah；　dear；　if　I　were　George；　and　gave　you　one　kiss；　it　would

make　you　brave。　You　have　to　go　cold　into　a　battle　that　needs

warmth；　out　into　the　muddle　that　you　have　made　yourself；　and　your

mother　and　all　your　friends　will　despise　you；　oh；　my　darling；　and

rightly；　if　it　is　ever　right　to　despise。　George　still　dark；　all

the　tussle　and　the　misery　without　a　word　from　him。　Am　I

justified？〃　Into　his　own　eyes　tears　came。　〃Yes；　for　we　fight　for

more　than　Love　or　Pleasure；　there　is　Truth。　Truth　counts；　Truth

does　count。〃



〃You　kiss　me；〃　said　the　girl。　〃You　kiss　me。　I　will　try。〃



He　gave　her　a　sense　of　deities　reconciled；　a　feeling　that；　in

gaining　the　man　she　loved；　she　would　gain　something　for　the　whole

world。　Throughout　the　squalor　of　her　homeward　driveshe　spoke　at

oncehis　salutation　remained。　He　had　robbed　the　body　of　its

taint；　the　world's　taunts　of　their　sting；　he　had　shown　her　the

holiness　of　direct　desire。　She　〃never　exactly　understood；〃　she

would　say　in　after　years；　〃how　he　managed　to　strengthen　her。　It

was　as　if　he　had　made　her　see　the　whole　of　everything　at　once。〃







Chapter　XX：　The　End　of　the　Middle　Ages



The　Miss　Alans　did　go　to　Greece；　but　they　went　by　themselves。

They　alone　of　this　little　company　will　double　Malea　and　plough

the　waters　of　the　Saronic　gulf。　They　alone　will　visit　Athens　and

Delphi；　and　either　shrine　of　intellectual　songthat　upon　the

Acropolis；　encircled　by　blue　seas；　that　under　Parnassus；　where

the　eagles　build　and　the　bronze　charioteer　drives　undismayed

towards　infinity。　Trembling；　anxious；　cumbered　with　much

digestive　bread；　they　did　proceed　to　Constantinople；　they　did　go

round　the　world。　The　rest　of　us　must　be　contented　with　a　fair；

but　a　less　arduous；　goal。　Italiam　petimus：　we　return　to　the

Pension　Bertolini。



George　said　it　was　his　old　room。



〃No；　it　isn't；〃　said　Lucy；　〃because　it　is　the　room　I　had；　and　I

had　your