albert savarus-第19章
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mortified herself by remaining on her knees； her arms outstretched for
hours； and repeating prayers all the time。 She had compelled Mariette
to similar sets of repentance； her passion was mingled with genuine
asceticism； and was all the more dangerous。
〃Shall I read that letter； shall I not？〃 she asked herself； while
listening to the Chavoncourt girls。 One was sixteen； the other
seventeen and a half。 Rosalie looked upon her two friends as mere
children because they were not secretly in love。〃If I read it；〃 she
finally decided； after hesitating for an hour between Yes and No； 〃it
shall； at any rate； be the last。 Since I have gone so far as to see
what he wrote to his friend； why should I not know what he says to
/her/？ If it is a horrible crime； is it not a proof of love？ Oh；
Albert！ am I not your wife？〃
When Rosalie was in bed she opened the letter； dated from day to day；
so as to give the Duchess a faithful picture of Albert's life and
feelings。
〃25th。
〃My dear Soul； all is well。 To my other conquests I have just
added an invaluable one： I have done a service to one of the most
influential men who work the elections。 Like the critics； who make
other men's reputations but can never make their own； he makes
deputies though he never can become one。 The worthy man wanted to
show his gratitude without loosening his purse…strings by saying
to me； 'Would you care to sit in the Chamber？ I can get you
returned as deputy。'
〃 'If I ever make up my mind to enter on a political career；'
replied I hypocritically； 'it would be to devote myself to the
Comte； which I love； and where I am appreciated。'
〃 'Well；' he said； 'we will persuade you； and through you we shall
have weight in the Chamber； for you will distinguish yourself
there。'
〃And so； my beloved angel； say what you will； my perseverance will
be rewarded。 Ere long I shall； from the high place of the French
Tribune； come before my country； before Europe。 My name will be
flung to you by the hundred voices of the French press。
〃Yes； as you tell me； I was old when I came to Besancon； and
Besancon has aged me more； but； like Sixtus V。； I shall be young
again the day after my election。 I shall enter on my true life； my
own sphere。 Shall we not then stand in the same line？ Count
Savaron de Savarus； Ambassador I know not where； may surely marry
a Princess Soderini； the widow of the Duc d'Argaiolo！ Triumph
restores the youth of men who have been preserved by incessant
struggles。 Oh； my Life！ with what gladness did I fly from my
library to my private room； to tell your portrait of this progress
before writing to you！ Yes； the votes I can command； those of the
Vicar…General； of the persons I can oblige； and of this client；
make my election already sure。
〃26th。
〃We have entered on the twelfth year since that blest evening
when； by a look； the beautiful Duchess sealed the promises made by
the exile Francesca。 You； dear； are thirty…two； I am thirty…five；
the dear Duke is seventy…seventhat is to say； ten years more
than yours and mine put together； and he still keeps well！ My
patience is almost as great as my love； and indeed I need a few
years yet to rise to the level of your name。 As you see； I am in
good spirits to…day； I can laugh； that is the effect of hope。
Sadness or gladness； it all comes to me through you。 The hope of
success always carries me back to the day following that one on
which I saw you for the first time； when my life became one with
yours as the earth turns to the light。 /Qual pianto/ are these
eleven years； for this is the 26th of December； the anniversary of
my arrival at your villa on the Lake of Geneva。 For eleven years
have I been crying to you； while you shine like a star set too
high for man to reach it。
〃27th。
〃No； dearest； do not go to Milan； stay at Belgirate。 Milan
terrifies me。 I do not like that odious Milanese fashion of
chatting at the Scala every evening with a dozen persons； among
whom it is hard if no one says something sweet。 To me solitude is
like the lump of amber in whose heart an insect lives for ever in
unchanging beauty。 Thus the heart and soul of a woman remains pure
and unaltered in the form of their first youth。 Is it the
/Tedeschi/ that you regret？
〃28th。
〃Is your statue never to be finished？ I should wish to have you in
marble； in painting； in miniature； in every possible form； to
beguile my impatience。 I still am waiting for the view of
Belgirate from the south； and that of the balcony； these are all
that I now lack。 I am so extremely busy that to…day I can only
write you nothingbut that nothing is everything。 Was it not of
nothing that God made the world？ That nothing is a word； God's
word： I love you！
〃30th。
〃Ah！ I have received your journal。 Thanks for your punctuality。
So you found great pleasure in seeing all the details of our first
acquaintance thus set down？ Alas！ even while disguising them I was
sorely afraid of offending you。 We had no stories； and a /Review/
without stories is a beauty without hair。 Not being inventive by
nature； and in sheer despair； I took the only poetry in my soul；
the only adventure in my memory； and pitched it in the key in
which it would bear telling； nor did I ever cease to think of you
while writing the only literary production that will ever come
from my heart； I cannot say from my pen。 Did not the
transformation of your fierce Sormano into Gina make you laugh？
〃You ask after my health。 Well； it is better than in Paris。 Though
I work enormously； the peacefulness of the surroundings has its
effect on the mind。 What really tries and ages me； dear angel； is
the anguish of mortified vanity； the perpetual friction of Paris
life； the struggle of rival ambitions。 This peace is a balm。
〃If you could imagine the pleasure your letter gives me！the
long； kind letter in which you tell me the most trivial incidents
of your life。 No！ you women can never know to what a degree a true
lover is interested in these trifles。 It was an immense pleasure
to see the pattern of your new dress。 Can it be a matter of
indifference to me to know what you wear？ If your lofty brow is
knit？ If our writers amuse you？ If Canalis' songs delight you？ I
read the books you read。 Even to your boating on the lake every
incident touched me。 Your letter is as lovely； as sweet as your
soul！ Oh！ flower of heaven； perpetually adored； could I have lived
without those dear letters； which for eleven years have upheld me
in my difficult path like a light； like a perfume； like a steady
chant； like some divine nourishment； like everything which can
soothe and comfort life。
〃Do not fail me！ If you knew what anxiety I suffer the day before
they are due； or the pain a day's delay can give me！ Is she ill？
Is /he/？ I am midway between hell and paradise。
〃/O mia cara diva/； keep up your music； exercise your voice；
practise。 I am enchanted with the coincidence of employments and
hours by which； though separated by the Alps； we live by precisely
the same rule。 The thought charms me and gives me courage。 The
first time I undertook to plead hereI forget to tell you thisI
fancied that you were listening to me； and I suddenly felt the
flash of inspiration which lifts the poet above mankind。 If I am
returned to the Chamberoh！ you must come to Paris to be present
at my first appearance there！
〃30th； Evening。
〃Good heavens； how I love you！ Alas！ I have intrusted too much to
my love and my hopes。 An accident which should sink that
overloaded bark would end my life。 For three years now I have not
seen you； and at the thought of going to Belgirate my heart beats
so wildly that I am forced to stop。To see you； to hear that
girlish caressing voice！ To embrace in my gaze that ivory skin；
glistening under the candlelight； and through which I can read
your noble mind！ To admire your fingers playing on the keys； to
drink in your whole soul in a look； in the tone of an /Oime/ or an
/Al
