01-the kreutzer sonata-第7章
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love； as it is called； not only did she appear to me a perfect
being； but I considered myself a white blackbird。 It is a
commonplace fact that there is no one so low in the world that he
cannot find some one viler than himself； and consequently puff
with pride and self…contentment。 I was in that situation。 I did
not marry for money。 Interest was foreign to the affair； unlike
the marriages of most of my acquaintances； who married either for
money or for relations。 First； I was rich； she was poor。
Second； I was especially proud of the fact that； while others
married with an intention of continuing their polygamic life as
bachelors； it was my firm intention to live monogamically after
my engagement and the wedding； and my pride swelled immeasurably。
〃Yes； I was a wretch； convinced that I was an angel。 The period
of my engagement did not last long。 I cannot remember those days
without shame。 What an abomination！
〃It is generally agreed that love is a moral sentiment； a
community of thought rather than of sense。 If that is the case；
this community of thought ought to find expression in words and
conversation。 Nothing of the sort。 It was extremely difficult
for us to talk with each other。 What a toil of Sisyphus was our
conversation！ Scarcely had we thought of something to say； and
said it； when we had to r俿um偂ur silence and try to discover
new subjects。 Literally； we did not know what to say to each
other。 All that we could think of concerning the life that was
before us and our home was said。
〃And then what？ If we had been animals； we should have known
that we had not to talk。 But here； on the contrary； it was
necessary to talk； and there were no resources！ For that which
occupied our minds was not a thing to be expressed in words。
〃And then that silly custom of eating bon…bons； that brutal
gluttony for sweetmeats； those abominable preparations for the
wedding； those discussions with mamma upon the apartments； upon
the sleeping…rooms； upon the bedding； upon the morning…gowns；
upon the wrappers； the linen； the costumes！ Understand that if
people married according to the old fashion； as this old man said
just now； then these eiderdown coverlets and this bedding would
all be sacred details； but with us； out of ten married people
there is scarcely to be found one who； I do not say believes in
sacraments （whether he believes or not is a matter of
indifference to us）； but believes in what he promises。 Out of a
hundred men； there is scarcely one who has not married before；
and out of fifty scarcely one who has not made up his mind to
deceive his wife。
〃The great majority look upon this journey to the church as a
condition necessary to the possession of a certain woman。 Think
then of the supreme significance which material details must take
on。 Is it not a sort of sale； in which a maiden is given over to
a debauche； the sale being surrounded with the most agreeable
details？
CHAPTER XI。
〃All marry in this way。 And I did like the rest。 If the young
people who dream of the honeymoon only knew what a disillusion it
is； and always a disillusion！ I really do not know why all think
it necessary to conceal it。
〃One day I was walking among the shows in Paris； when； attracted
by a sign； I entered an establishment to see a bearded woman and
a water…dog。 The woman was a man in disguise； and the dog was an
ordinary dog； covered with a sealskin； and swimming in a bath。
It was not in the least interesting； but the Barnum accompanied
me to the exit very courteously； and； in addressing the people
who were coming in； made an appeal to my testimony。 'Ask the
gentleman if it is not worth seeing！ Come in； come in！ It only
costs a franc！' And in my confusion I did not dare to answer
that there was nothing curious to be seen； and it was upon my
false shame that the Barnum must have counted。
〃It must be the same with the persons who have passed through the
abominations of the honeymoon。 They do not dare to undeceive
their neighbor。 And I did the same。
〃The felicities of the honeymoon do not exist。 On the contrary；
it is a period of uneasiness； of shame； of pity； and； above all；
of ennui；of ferocious ennui。 It is something like the
feeling of a youth when he is beginning to smoke。 He desires to
vomit； he drivels； and swallows his drivel； pretending to enjoy
this little amusement。 The vice of marriage〃 。 。 。
〃What！ Vice？〃 I said。 〃But you are talking of one of the most
natural things。〃
〃Natural！〃 said he。 〃Natural！ No； I consider on the contrary
that it is against nature； and it is I； a perverted man； who have
reached this conviction。 What would it be； then； if I had not
known corruption？ To a young girl； to every unperverted young
girl； it is an act extremely unnatural； just as it is to
children。 My sister married； when very young； a man twice her
own age； and who was utterly corrupt。 I remember how astonished
we were the night of her wedding； when； pale and covered with
tears； she fled from her husband； her whole body trembling；
saying that for nothing in the world would she tell what he
wanted of her。
〃You say natural？ It is natural to eat； that is a pleasant；
agreeable function； which no one is ashamed to perform from the
time of his birth。 No； it is not natural。 A pure young girl
wants one thing；children。 Children； yes； not a lover。〃 。 。 。
〃But；〃 said I； with astonishment； 〃how would the human race
continue？〃
〃But what is the use of its continuing？〃 he rejoined；
vehemently。
〃What！ What is the use？ But then we should not exist。〃
〃And why is it necessary that we should exist？〃
〃Why； to live； to be sure。〃
〃And why live？ The Schopenhauers； the Hartmanns； and all the
Buddhists； say that the greatest happiness is Nirvana； Non…Life；
and they are right in this sense；that human happiness is
coincident with the annihilation of 'Self。' Only they do not
express themselves well。 They say that Humanity should
annihilate itself to avoid its sufferings； that its object should
be to destroy itself。 Now the object of Humanity cannot be to
avoid sufferings by annihilation； since suffering is the result
of activity。 The object of activity cannot consist in
suppressing its consequences。 The object of Man； as of Humanity；
is happiness； and； to attain it； Humanity has a law which it must
carry out。 This law consists in the union of beings。 This union
is thwarted by the passions。 And that is why； if the passions
disappear； the union will be accomplished。 Humanity then will
have carried out the law； and will have no further reason to
exist。〃
〃And before Humanity carries out the law？〃
〃In the meantime it will have the sign of the unfulfilled law；
and the existence of physical love。 As long as this love shall
exist； and because of it； generations will be born； one of which
will finally fulfil the law。 When at last the law shall be
fulfilled； the Human Race will be annihilated。 At least it is
impossible for us to conceive of Life in the perfect union of
people。〃
CHAPTER XII。
〃Strange theory！〃 cried I。
〃Strange in what？ According to all the doctrines of the Church；
the world will have an end。 Science teaches the same fatal
conclusions。 Why； then； is it strange that the same thing should
result from moral Doctrine？ 'Let those who can； contain；' said
Christ。 And I take this passage literally； as it is written。
That morality may exist between people in their worldly
relations； they must make complete chastity their object。 In
tending toward this end； man humiliates himself。 When he shall
reach the last degree of humiliation； we shall have moral
marriage。
〃But if man； as in our society； tends only toward physical love；
though he may clothe it with pretexts and the false forms of
marriage； he will have only permissible
