the heir of redclyffe-第61章
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tell him where they were; but always gave his address at the place of
his engagement); was conducted by him to some concert in the evening;
and had him to breakfast in the morning。 He could not think there was
any harm in this; he explained all he had done to Mr。 Edmonstone the
first time; but nothing was gained by it: his visits to London
continued to be treated as something to be excused or overlookedas
something not quite correct。
He would almost have been ready to discontinue them; but that he saw
that his uncle regarded him with affection; and he could not bear the
thought of giving up a poor relation for the sake of the opinion of his
rich friends。 These meetings were the one pure pleasure to which
Sebastian looked; recalling to him the happier days of his youth; and
of his friendship with Guy's father; and when Guy perceived how he
valued them; it would have seemed a piece of cruel neglect to gratify
himself by giving the time to Hollywell。
Early in the course of their acquaintance; the importunity of a
creditor revealed that; in spite of his handsome salary; Sebastian
Dixon was often in considerable distress for money。 In process of
time; Guy discovered that at the time his uncle had been supporting his
sister and her husband in all the luxury he thought befitted their
rank; he had contracted considerable debts; and he had only been able
to return to England on condition of paying so much a…year to his
creditors。 This left him very little on which to maintain his family;
but still his pride made him bent on concealing his difficulties; and
it was not without a struggle that he would at first consent to receive
assistance from his nephew。
Guy resolved that these debts; which he considered as in fact his
father's own; should be paid as soon as he had the command of his
property; but; in the meantime; he thought himself bound to send his
uncle all the help in his power; and when once the effort of accepting
it at all was over; Dixon's expectations extended far beyond his power。
His allowance was not large; and the constant requests for a few pounds
to meet some pressing occasion were more than he could well meet。 They
kept him actually a great deal poorer than men without a tenth part of
his fortune; and at the end of the term he would look back with
surprise at having been able to pay his way; but still he contrived
neither to exceed his allowance; nor to get into debt。 This was;
indeed; only done by a rigid self…denial of little luxuries such as
most young men look on nearly as necessaries; but he had never been
brought up to think self…indulgence a consequence of riches; he did not
care what was said of him; he had no expensive tastes; for he did not
seek after society; so that he was not ill…prepared for such a course;
and only thought of it as an assistance in abstaining from the time…
wasting that might have tempted him if he had had plenty of money to
spend。
The only thing that concerned him was a growing doubt lest he might be
feeding extravagance instead of doing good; and the more he disliked
himself for the suspicion; the more it would return。 There was no
doubt much distress; the children were sickly; several of them died;
the doctor's bills; and other expenses; pressed heavily; and Guy blamed
himself for having doubted。 Yet; again; he could not conceal from
himself traces that his uncle was careless and imprudent。 He had once;
indeed; in a violent fit of self…reproach; confessed as much; allowed
that what ought to have been spent in the maintenance of his family;
had gone in gambling; but immediately after; he had been seized with a
fit of terror; and implored Guy to guard the secret; since; if once it
came to the knowledge of his creditors; it would be all over with him。
Concealment of his present difficulties was therefore no less necessary
than assistance in paying the sum he owed。 Indeed; as far as Guy was
able to understand his confused statement; what he wanted was at once
to pay a part of his debt; before he could go on to a place where he
was engaged to perform; and where he would earn enough to make up the
rest。
Guy had intended to have sent for Deloraine; but had since given up the
idea; in order to be able to help forward some plans of Miss
Wellwood's; and resigning this project would enable him to place thirty
pounds at his uncle's disposal; leaving him just enough to pay his
expenses at South Moor; and carry him back to Hollywell。 It was sorely
against his inclination that; instead of helping a charity; his savings
should go to pay gaming debts; and his five…miles walk was spent in
self…debate on the right and wrong of the matter; and questions what
should be done for the futurefor he was beginning to awaken to the
sense of his responsibility; and feared lest he might be encouraging
vice。
Very early next morning Guy put his head into his tutor's room;
announced that he must walk into St。 Mildred's on business; but should
be back by eleven at the latest; ran down…stairs; called Bustle; and
made interest with the farmer's wife for a hunch of dry bread and a cup
of new milk。
Then rejoicing that he had made up his mind; though not light…hearted
enough to whistle; he walked across the moorland; through the white
morning mist; curling on the sides of the hills in fantastic forms; and
now and then catching his lengthened shadow; so as to make him smile by
reminding him of the spectre of the Brocken。
Not without difficulty; he found a back street; and a little shop;
where a slovenly maid was sweeping the steps; and the shutters were not
yet taken down。 He asked if Mr。 Dixon lodged there。 'Yes;' the woman
said; staring in amazement that such a gentleman could be there at that
time in the morning; asking for Mr。 Dixon。
'Is he at home?'
'Yes; sir but he is not up yet。 He was very late last night。 Did you
want to speak to him? I'll tell Mrs。 Dixon。'
'Is Mrs。 Dixon here? Then tell her Sir Guy Morville would be glad to
speak to her。'
The maid curtseyed; hurried off; and returned with a message from Mrs。
Dixon to desire he would walk in。 She conducted him through a dark
passage; and up a still darker stair; into a dingy little parlour; with
a carpet of red and green stripes; a horsehair sofa; a grate covered
with cut paper; and a general perfume of brandy and cigars。 There were
some preparations for breakfast; but no one was in the room but a
little girl; about seven years old; dressed in shabby…genteel mourning。
She was pale and sickly…looking; but her eyes were of a lovely deep
blue; with a very sweet expression; and a profusion of thick flaxen
curls hung round her neck and shoulders。 She said in a soft; little;
shy voice;
'Mamma says she will be here directly; if you will excuse her a
moment。'
Having made this formal speech; the little thing was creeping off on
tip…toe; so as to escape before the maid shut the door; but Guy held
out his hand; sat down so as to be on a level with her; and said;
'Don't go; my little maid。 Won't you come and speak to your cousin
Guy?'
Children never failed to be attracted; whether by the winning beauty of
his smile; or the sweetness of the voice in which he spoke to anything
small or weak; and the little girl willingly came up to him; and put
her hand into his。 He stroked her thick; silky curls; and asked her
name。
'Marianne;' she answered。
It was his mother's name; and this little creature had more resemblance
to his tenderly…cherished vision of his young mother than any
description Dixon could have given。 He drew her closer to him; took
the other small; cold hand; and asked her how she liked St。 Mildred's。
'Oh! much better than London。 There are flowers!' and she proudly
exhibited a cup holding some ragged robins; d