donal grant-第96章
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much; however; from the influence of Miss Carmichael upon her
spirits; that she had forsaken the exercise。 Partly because her
uncle was neither much respected nor much liked; she had visited
very little; and after mental trouble assailed her; growing under
the false prescriptions of the soul…doctor she had called in; she
withdrew more and more; avoiding even company she would have
enjoyed; and which would before now have led her to resume it。
For a time she persisted in refusing to ride with Forgue。 In vain he
offered his horse; assuring her that Davie's pony was quite able to
carry him; she had no inclination to ride; she said。 But at last one
day; lest she should be guilty of unkindness; she consented; and so
enjoyed the ridefelt; indeed; so much the better for it; that she
did not thereafter so positively as before decline to allow her
cousin to look out for a horse fit to carry her; and Forgue; taking
her consent for granted; succeeded; with the help of the factor; in
finding for her a beautiful creature; just of the sort to please
her。 Almost at sight of him she agreed to his purchase。
This put Forgue in great spirits; and much contentment with himself。
He did not doubt that; gaining thus opportunity so excellent; he
would quickly succeed in withdrawing her from the absurd influence
which; to his dismay; he discovered his enemy had in his absence
gained over her。 He ought not to have been such a fool; he said to
himself; as to leave the poor child to the temptations naturally
arising in such a dreary solitude! He noted with satisfaction;
however; that the parson's daughter seemed to have forsaken the
house。 And now at last; having got rid of the folly that a while
possessed him; he was prepared to do his duty by the family; and; to
that end; would make unfaltering use of the fascinations experience
had taught him he was; in a most exceptional degree; gifted with! He
would at once take Arctura's education in his own hands; and give
his full energy to it! She should speedily learn the difference
between the assistance of a gentleman and that of a clotpoll!
He had in England improved in his riding as well as his manners; and
knew at least how a gentleman; if not how a man; ought to behave to
the beast that carried him。 Also; having ridden a good deal with
ladies; he was now able to give Arctura not a few hints to the
improvement of her seat; her hand; her courage; nor was there any
nearer road; he judged from what he knew of his cousin; to her
confidence and gratitude; than showing her a better way in a thing。
But thinking that in teaching her to ride he could make her forget
the man who had been teaching her to live; he was not a little
mistaken in the woman he desired to captivate。
He did not yet love her even in the way he called loving; else he
might have been less confident; but he found her very pleasing。
Invigorated by the bright frosty air; the life of the animal under
her; and the exultation of rapid motion; she seemed better in
health; more merry and full of life; than he had ever seen her: he
put all down to his success with her。 He was incapable of suspecting
how little of it was owing to him; incapable of believing how much
to the fact that she now turned to the father of spirits without
fear; almost without doubt; thought of him as the root of every
delight of the worldat the heart of the horse she rode; in the
wind that blew joy into hers as she swept through its yielding
bosom; knew him as altogether loving and true; the father of Jesus
Christ; as like him as like could be likemore like him than any
one else in the universe could be like anotherlike him as only
eternal son can be like eternal father。
It was no wonder that with such a well of living water in her heart
she should be gladmerry even; and ready for anything her horse
could do! Flying across a field in the very wildness of pleasure;
her hair streaming behind her; and her pale face glowing; she would
now and then take a jump Forgue declared he could not face in cold
blood: he did not know how far from cold her blood was! He began to
wonder he had been such a fool as neglect her forwell; never
mind!and to feel something that was like love; and was indeed
admiration。 But for the searing brand of his past; he might have
loved her trulyas a man may; without being the most exalted of
mortals; for in love we are beyond our ordinary selves; the deep
thing in us peers up into the human air; and is of Godtherefore
cannot live long in the mephitic air of a selfish and low nature;
but sinks again out of sight。
He was not at his ease with Arctura; he was afraid of her。 When a
man is conscious of wrong; knows in his history what would draw a
hideous smudge over the portrait he would present to the eyes of her
he would please; he may well be afraid of her。 He makes liberal
allowance for himself; but is not sure she will! And before Forgue
lay a social gulf which he could pass only on the narrow plank of
her favour! The more he was with her; the more he admired her; the
more he desired to marry her; the more satisfied he grew with his
own improvement; the more determined he became that for no poor;
unjust scruples would he forgo his happiness。 There was but one
trifle to be kept from the world; it might know everything else
about him! and once in possession of the property; who would dispute
the title? Then again he was not certain that his father had not
merely invented a threat! Surely if the fact were such; he would;
even in rage diabolic; have kept it to himself!
Impetuous; and accustomed to what he counted success; he soon began
to make plainer advance toward the end on which his self…love and
cupidity at least were set。 But; knowing in a vague manner how he
had carried himself before he went; Arctura; uninfluenced by the
ways of the world; her judgment unwarped; her perception undimmed;
her instincts nice; her personal delicacy exacting; had never
imagined he could approach her on any ground but that of cousinship
and a childhood of shared sports。 She had seen that Donal was far
from pleased with him; and believed Forgue knew that she knew he had
been behaving badly。 Her behaviour to him was indeed largely based
on the fact that he was in disgrace: she was sorry for him。
By and by; however; she perceived that she had been allowing too
much freedom where she was not prepared to allow more; and so one
day declined to go with him。 They had not had a ride for a
fortnight; the weather having been unfavourable; and now when a
morning broke into the season like a smile from an estranged friend;
she would not go! He was annoyedthen alarmed; fearing adverse
influence。 They were alone in the breakfast…room。
〃Why will you not; Arctura?〃 he asked reproachfully: 〃do you not
feel well?〃
〃I am quite well;〃 she answered。
〃It is such a lovely day!〃 he pleaded。
〃I am not in the mood。 There are other things in the world besides
riding; and I have been wasting my timeriding too much。 I have
learnt next to nothing since Larkie came。〃
〃Oh; bother! what have you to do with learning! Health is the first
thing。〃
〃I don't think soand learning is good for the health。 Besides; I
would not be a mere animal for perfect health!〃
〃Let me help you then with your studies。〃
〃Thank you;〃 she answered; laughing a little; 〃but I have a good
master already! We; that is Davie and I; are reading Greek and
mathematics with Mr。 Grant。〃
Forgue's face flushed。
〃I ought to know as much of both as he does!〃 he said。
〃Ought perhaps! But you know you do not。〃
〃I know enough to be your tutor。〃
〃Yes; but I know enough not to be your pupil!〃
〃What do you mean?〃
〃That you can't teach。〃
〃How do you know that?〃
〃Because you do not love either Greek or mathematics; and no one who
does not love can teach。〃
〃That is nonsense! If I don't love Greek enough to teach it; I love
you enough to teach you;〃 said Forgue。
〃You are my riding…master;〃 said Arctura; 〃Mr。 Grant is my master in
Greek。〃
Forgue strangled an imprecation on Mr。 Grant; and tried to laugh;
but there was not a laugh inside him。
〃Then you won't ride to…day?〃 he said。
〃I