donal grant-第48章
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〃I will answer you anything you choose to ask。〃
〃That makes it the more difficult； but I willI cannot bear to
remain longer in doubt： did you really write that poem you gave to
Kate Graemecompose it； I mean； your own self？〃
〃I made no secret of that when I gave it her；〃 said Donal； not
perceiving her drift。
〃Then you did really write it？〃
Donal looked at her in perplexity。 Her face grew very red； and tears
began to come in her eyes。
〃You must pardon me！〃 she said： 〃I am so ignorant！ And we live in
such an out…of…the…way place thatthat it seems very unlikely a
real poet！ And then I have been told there are people who have a
passion for appearing to do the thing they are not able to do； and I
was anxious to be quite sure！ My mind would keep brooding over it；
and wondering； and longing to know for certain！So I resolved at
last that I would be rid of the doubt； even at the risk of offending
you。 I know I have been rudeunpardonably rude； but〃
〃But；〃 supplemented Donal； with a most sympathetic smile； for he
understood her as his own thought； 〃you do not feel quite sure yet！
What a priori reason do you see why I should not be able to write
verses？ There is no rule as to where poetry grows： one place is as
good as another for that！〃
〃I hope you will forgive me！ I hope I have not offended you very
much！〃
〃Nobody in such a world as this ought to be offended at being asked
for proof。 If there are in it rogues that look like honest men； how
is any one； without a special gift of insight； to be always sure of
the honest man？ Even the man whom a woman loves best will sometimes
tear her heart to pieces！ I will give you all the proof you can
desire。And lest the tempter should say I made up the proof itself
between now and to…morrow morning； I will fetch it at once。〃
〃Oh； Mr。 Grant； spare me！ I am not； indeed I am not so bad as that！〃
〃Who can tell when or whence the doubt may wake again； or what may
wake it！〃
〃At least let me explain a little before you go；〃 she said。
〃Certainly；〃 he answered； reseating himself； in compliance with her
example。
〃Miss Graeme told me that you had never seen a garden like theirs
before！〃
〃I never did。 There are none such； I fancy； in our part of the
country。〃
〃Nor in our neighbourhood either。〃
〃Then what is surprising in it？〃
〃Nothing in that。 But is there not something in your being able to
write a poem like that about a garden such as you had never seen？
One would say you must have been familiar with it from childhood to
be able so to enter into the spirit of the place！〃
〃Perhaps if I had been familiar with it from childhood； that might
have disabled me from feeling the spirit of it； for then might it
not have looked to me as it looked to those in whose time such
gardens were the fashion？ Two things are necessaryfirst； that
there should be a spirit in a place； and next that the place should
be seen by one whose spirit is capable of giving house…room to its
spirit。By the way； does the ghost…lady feel the place all right？〃
〃I am not sure that I know what you mean； but I felt the grass with
her feet as I read； and the wind lifting my hair。 I seemed to know
exactly how she felt！〃
〃Now tell me； were you ever a ghost？〃
〃No；〃 she answered； looking in his face like a childwithout even a
smile。
〃Did you ever see a ghost？〃
〃No； never。〃
〃Then how should you know how a ghost would feel？〃
〃I see！ I cannot answer you。〃
Donal rose。
〃I am indeed ashamed！〃 said lady Arctura。
〃Ashamed of giving me the chance of proving myself a true man？〃
〃That； at least； is no longer necessary！〃
〃But I want my revenge。 As a punishment for doubting one whom you
had so little ground for believing； you shall be compelled to see
the proofthat is； if you will do me the favour to wait here till I
come back。 I shall not be long； though it is some distance to the
top of Baliol's tower。〃
〃Davie told me your room was there： do you not find it cold？ It must
be very lonely！ I wonder why mistress Brookes put you there！〃
Donal assured her he could not have had a place more to his mind；
and before she could well think he had reached the foot of his
stair； was back with a roll of papers； which he laid on the table。
〃There！〃 he said； opening it out； 〃if you will take the trouble to
go over these； you may read the growth of the poem。 Here first you
see it blocked out rather roughly； and much blotted with erasures
and substitutions。 Here next you see the result copiedclean to
begin with； but afterwards scored and scored。 You see the words I
chose instead of the first； and afterwards in their turn rejected；
until in the proofs I reached those which I have as yet let stand。 I
do not fancy Miss Graeme has any doubt the verses are mine； for it
was plain she thought them rubbish。 From your pains to know who
wrote them； I believe you do not think so badly of them！〃
She thought he was satirical； and gave a slight sigh as of pain。 It
went to his heart。
〃I did not mean the smallest reflection； my lady； on your desire for
satisfaction；〃 he said； 〃rather； indeed； it flatters me。 But is it
not strange the heart should be less ready to believe what seems
worth believing？ Something must be true： why not the worthyoftener
at least than the unworthy？ Why should it be easier to believe hard
things of God； for instance； than lovely things？or that one man
copied from another； than that he should have made the thing
himself？ Some would yet say I contrived all this semblance of
composition in order to lay the surer claim to that to which I had
nonenor would take the trouble to follow the thing through its
development！ But it will be easy for you； my lady； and no bad
exercise in logic and analysis； to determine whether the genuine
growth of the poem be before you in these papers or not。〃
〃I shall find it most interesting；〃 said lady Arctura： 〃so much I
can tell already！ I never saw anything of the kind before； and had
no idea how poetry was made。 Does it always take so much labour？〃
〃Some verses take much more； some none at all。 The labour is in
getting the husks of expression cleared off； so that the thought may
show itself plainly。〃
At this point Mrs。 Brookes； thinking probably the young people had
had long enough conference； entered； and after a little talk with
her； lady Arctura kissed her and bade her good night。 Donal retired
to his aerial chamber； wondering whether the lady of the house had
indeed changed as much as she seemed to have changed。
》From that time； whether it was that lady Arctura had previously
avoided meeting him and now did not； or from other causes； Donal and
she met much oftener as they went about the place； nor did they ever
pass without a mutual smile and greeting。
The next day but one； she brought him his papers to the schoolroom。
She had read every erasure and correction； she told him； and could
no longer have had a doubt that the writer of the papers was the
maker of the verses； even had she not previously learned thorough
confidence in the man himself。
〃They would possibly fail to convince a jury though！〃 he said； as he
rose and went to throw them in the fire。
Divining his intent； Arctura darted after him； and caught them just
in time。
〃Let me keep them；〃 she pleaded； 〃for my humiliation！〃
〃Do with them what you like； my lady；〃 said Donal。 〃They are of no
value to meexcept that you care for them。〃
CHAPTER XXXIV。
COBBLER AND CASTLE。
In the bosom of the family in which the elements seem most kindly
mixed； there may yet lie some root of discord and disruption； upon
which the foreign influence necessary to its appearance above
ground； has not yet come to operate。 That things are quiet is no
proof； only a hopeful sign of harmony。 In a family of such poor
accord as that at the castle； the peace might well at any moment be
broken。
Lord Forgue had been for some time on a visit to Edinburgh； had
doubtless there been made much of； and had returned with a
considerable development of haughtiness； and of that freedom which
means subjugation to self； and freedom from the law of liberty。 It
is often when a man is least satisfiednot with
