donal grant-第24章

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But　though　she　had　never　been　troubled　herself；　and　that　because
she　had　never　been　in　earnest；　she　did　not　find　it　the　less　easy　to
take　upon　her　the　r鬺e　of　a　spiritual　adviser；　and　gave　no　end　of
counsel　for　the　attainment　of　assurance。　　She　told　her　truly　enough
that　all　her　trouble　came　of　want　of　faith；　but　she　showed　her　no
one　fit　to　believe　in。




CHAPTER　XVIII。

A　CLASH。

All　this　time；　Donal　had　never　again　seen　the　earl；　neither　had　the
latter　shown　any　interest　in　Davie's　progress。　　But　lady　Arctura　was
full　of　serious　anxiety　concerning　him。　　Heavily　prejudiced　against
the　tutor；　she　dreaded　his　influence　on　the　mind　of　her　little
cousin。

There　was　a　small　recess　in　the　schoolroomit　had　been　a　bay
window；　but　from　an　architectural　necessity　arising　from　decay；　it
had；　all　except　a　narrow　eastern　light；　been　built　upand　in　this
recess　Donal　was　one　day　sitting　with　a　book；　while　Davie　was　busy
writing　at　the　table　in　the　middle　of　the　room：　it　was　past
school…hours；　but　the　weather　did　not　invite　them　out　of　doors；　and
Donal　had　given　Davie　a　poem　to　copy。　　Lady　Arctura　came　into　the
roomshe　had　never　entered　it　before　since　Donal　cameand　thinking
he　was　alone；　began　to　talk　to　the　boy。　　She　spoke　in　so　gentle　a
tone　that　Donal；　busy　with　his　book；　did　not　for　some　time
distinguish　a　word　she　said。　　He　never　suspected　she　was　unaware　of
his　presence。　　By　degrees　her　voice　grew　a　little　louder；　and　by　and
by　these　words　reached　him：

〃You　know；　Davie　dear；　every　sin；　whatever　it　is；　deserves　God's
wrath　and　curse；　both　in　this　life　and　that　which　is　to　come；　and　if
it　had　not　been　that　Jesus　Christ　gave　himself　to　turn　away　his
anger　and　satisfy　his　justice　by　bearing　the　punishment　for　us；　God
would　send　us　all　to　the　place　of　misery　for　ever　and　ever。　　It　is
for　his　sake；　not　for　ours；　that　he　pardons　us。〃

She　had　not　yet　ceased　when　Donal　rose　in　the　wrath　of　love；　and
came　out　into　the　room。

〃Lady　Arctura；〃　he　said；　〃I　dare　not　sit　still　and　hear　such　false
things　uttered　against　the　blessed　God！〃

Lady　Arctura　started　in　dire　dismay；　but　in　virtue　of　her　breed　and
her　pride　recovered　herself　immediately；　drew　herself　up；　and　said

〃Mr。　Grant；　you　forget　yourself！〃

〃I'm　very　willing　to　do　that；　my　lady；〃　answered　Donal；　〃but　I　must
not　forget　the　honour　of　my　God。　If　you　were　a　heathen　woman　I　might
think　whether　the　hour　was　come　for　enlightening　you　further；　but　to
hear　one　who　has　had　the　Bible　in　her　hands　from　her　childhood　say
such　things　about　the　God　who　made　her　and　sent　his　Son　to　save　her；
without　answering　a　word　for　him；　would　be　cowardly！〃

〃What　do　you　know　about　such　things？　　What　gives　you　a　right　to
speak？〃　said　lady　Arctura。

Her　pride…strength　was　already　beginning　to　desert　her。

〃I　had　a　Christian　mother；〃　answered　Donal；　〃have　her　yet；　thank
God！who　taught　me　to　love　nothing　but　the　truth；　I　have　studied
the　Bible　from　my　childhood；　often　whole　days　together；　when　I　was
out　with　the　cattle　or　the　sheep；　and　I　have　tried　to　do　what　the
Lords　tells　me；　from　nearly　the　earliest　time　I　can　remember。
Therefore　I　am　able　to　set　to　my　seal　that　God　is　truethat　he　is
light；　and　there　is　no　darkness　of　unfairness　or　selfishness　in　him。
I　love　God　with　my　whole　heart　and　soul；　my　lady。〃

Arctura　tried　to　say　she　too　loved　him　so；　but　her　conscience
interfered；　and　she　could　not。

〃I　don't　say　you　don't　love　him；〃　Donal　went　on；　〃but　how　you　can
love　him　and　believe　such　things　of　him；　I　don't　understand。
Whoever　taught　them　first　was　a　terrible　liar　against　God；　who　is
lovelier　than　all　the　imaginations　of　all　his　creatures　can　think。〃

Lady　Arctura　swept　from　the　roomthough　she　was　trembling　from　head
to　foot。　　At　the　door　she　turned　and　called　Davie。　　The　boy　looked
up　in　his　tutor's　face；　mutely　asking　if　he　should　obey　her。

〃Go；〃　said　Donal。

In　less　than　a　minute　he　came　back；　his　eyes　full　of　tears。

〃Arkie　says　she　is　going　to　tell　papa。　　Is　it　true；　Mr。　Grant；　that
you　are　a　dangerous　man？　　I　do　not　believe　itthough　you　do　carry
such　a　big　knife。〃

Donal　laughed。

〃It　is　my　grandfather's　skean　dhu；〃　he　said：　〃I　mend　my　pens　with
it；　you　know！　　But　it　is　strange；　Davie；　that；　when　a　body　knows
something　other　people　don't；　they　should　be　angry　with　him！　　They
will　even　think　he　wants　to　make　them　bad　when　he　wants　to　help　them
to　be　good！〃

〃But　Arkie　is　good；　Mr。　Grant！〃

〃I　am　sure　she　is。　　But　she　does　not　know　so　much　about　God　as　I　do；
or　she　would　never　say　such　things　of　him：　we　must　talk　about　him
more　after　this！〃

〃No；　no；　please；　Mr。　Grant！　　We　won't　say　a　word　about　him；　for
Arkie　says　except　you　promise　never　to　speak　of　God；　she　will　tell
papa；　and　he　will　send　you　away。〃

〃Davie；〃　said　Donal　with　solemnity；　〃I　would　not　give　such　a　promise
for　the　castle　and　all　it　containsno；　not　to　save　your　life　and
the　life　of　everybody　in　it！　　For　Jesus　says；　'Whosoever　denieth　me
before　men；　him　will　I　deny　before　my　father　in　heaven；'　and　rather
than　that；　I　would　jump　from　the　top　of　the　castle。　　Why；　Davie！
would　a　man　deny　his　own　father　or　mother？〃

〃I　don't　know；〃　answered　Davie；　〃I　don't　remember　my　mother。〃

〃I'll　tell　you　what；〃　said　Donal；　with　sudden　inspiration：　〃I　will
promise　not　to　speak　about　God　at　any　other　time；　if　she　will
promise　to　sit　by　when　I　do　speak　of　himsay　once　a　week。Perhaps
we　shall　do　what　he　tells　us　all　the　better　that　we　don't　talk　so
much　about　him！〃

〃Oh；　thank　you；　Mr。　Grant！I　will　tell　her；〃　cried　Davie；　jumping
up　relieved。　〃Oh；　thank　you；　Mr。　Grant！〃　he　repeated；　〃I　could　not
bear　you　to　go　away。　　I　should　never　stop　crying　if　you　did。　　And
you　won't　say　any　wicked　things；　will　you？　for　Arkie　reads　her　Bible
every　day。〃

〃So　do　I；　Davie。〃

〃Do　you？〃　returned　Davie；　〃I'll　tell　her　that　too；　and　then　she　will
see　she　must　have　been　mistaken。〃

He　hurried　to　his　cousin　with　Donal's　suggestion。

It　threw　her　into　no　small　perplexityfirst　from　doubt　as　to　the
propriety　of　the　thing　proposed；　next　because　of　the　awkwardness　of
it；　then　from　a　sudden　fear　lest　his　specious　tongue　should　lead
herself　into　the　bypaths　of　doubt；　and　to　the　castle　of　Giant
Despairat　which；　indeed；　it　was　a　gracious　wonder　she　had　not
arrived　ere　now。　　What　if　she　should　be　persuaded　of　things　which　it
was　impossible　to　believe　and　be　saved！　　She　did　not　see　that　such
belief　as　she　desired　to　have　was　in　itself　essential　damnation。
For　what　can　there　be　in　heaven　or　earth　for　a　soul　that　believes
in　an　unjust　God？　　To　rejoice　in　such　a　belief　would　be　to　be　a
devil；　and　to　believe　what　cannot　be　rejoiced　in；　is　misery。　　No
doubt　a　man　may　not　see　the　true　nature　of　the　things　he　thinks　she
believes；　but　that　cannot　save　him　from　the　loss　of　not　knowing　God；
whom　to　know　is　alone　eternal　life；　for　who　can　know　him　that
believes　evil　things　of　him？　　That　many　a　good　man　does　believe　such
things；　only　argues　his　heart　not　yet　one　towards　him。　　To　make　his
belief　possible　he　must　dwell　on　the　good　things　he　has　learned
about　God；　and　not　think　about　the　bad　things。

And　what　would　Sophia　say？　　Lady　Arctura　would　have　sped　to　her
friend　for　counsel　before　giving　any　answer　to　the　audacious
proposal；　but　she　was　just　then　from　home　for　a　fortnight；　and　she
must　resolve　without　her！　　She　reflected　also　that　she　had　not　yet
anything　sufficiently　definite　to　say　to　her　uncle　about　the　young
man's　false　doctrine；　and；　for　herself；　concluded　that；　as　she　was
well　grounded　for　argument；　knowing　thoroughly　the　Shorter　Catechism
with　the　proofs　from　scripture　of　every　doctrine　it　contained；　it
was　foolish　to　fear　anything　from　one　who　went　in　the　strength　of
his　own　ignorant　and　presumptuous　will；　regardless　of　the　opinions
of　the　fathers　of　the　church；　and　accepting　only　such　things　as　were
pleasing　to　his　unregenerate　nature。

But　she　hesitated；　and　after　waiting　for　a　week　without　receiving
any　answer　to　his　proposal；　Donal　said　to　Davie；

〃We　shall　have　a　lesson　in　the　New　Testament　to…morrow：　you　had
better　mention　it　to　your　cousin。〃

The　next　morning　he　asked　him　if　he　had　mentioned　it。　　The　boy　said
he　had。