the turmoil-第49章

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his　hands　apart；　palms　outward；　in　a　furious　gesture　of　dismissal。　　〃Get　out

o'　this　room！　　You　got　a　skull　that's　thicker'n　a　whale's　thigh…bone；　but　it's

cracked　spang　all　the　way　across！　　You　hated　the　machine…shop　so　bad　when　I

sent　you　there；　you　went　and　stayed　sick　for　over　two　yearsand　now；　when　I

offer　to　take　you　out　of　it　and　give　you　the　mint；　you　holler　for　the　shop

like　a　calf　for　its　mammy！　　You're　cracked！　　Oh；　but　I　got　a　fine　layout　here！

One　son　died；　one　quit；　and　one's　a　loon！　　The　loon's　all　I　got　left！　　H。　P。

Ellersly's　wife　had　a　crazy　brother；　and　they　undertook　to　keep　him　at　the

house。　　First　morning　he　was　there　he　walked　straight　though　a　ten…dollar

plate…glass　window　out　into　the　yard。　　He　says；　'Oh；　look　at　the　pretty

dandelion！'　　That's　what　you're　doin'！　　You　want　to　spend　your　life　sayin'；

'Oh；　look　at　the　pretty　dandelion！'　and　you　don't　care　a　tinker's　dam'　what

you　bust！　　Well；　mister；　loon　or　no　loon；　cracked　and　crazy　or　whatever　you

are；　I'll　take　you　with　me　Monday　morning；　and　I'll　work　you　and　learn

youyes；　and　I'll　lam　you；　if　I　got　tountil　I've　made　something　out　of　you

that's　fit　to　be　called　a　business　man！　　I'll　keep　at　you　while　I'm　able　to

stand；　and　if　I　have　to　lay　down　to　die　I'll　be　whisperin'　at　you　till　they

get　the　embalmin'…fluid　into　me！　　Now　go　on；　and　don't　let　me　hear　from　you

again　till　you　can　come　and　tell　me　you've　waked　up；　you　poor；　pitiful；

dandelion…pickin'　SLEEP…WALKER！〃



Bibbs　gave　him　a　queer　look。　　There　was　something　like　reproach　in　it；　for

once；　but　there　was　more　than　thathe　seemed　to　be　startled　by　his　father's

last　word。





There　was　sleet　that　evening；　with　a　whopping　wind；　but　neither　this　storm　nor

that　other　which　so　imminently　threatened　him　held　place　in　the　consciousness

of　Bibbs　Sheridan　when　he　came　once　more　to　the　presence　of　Mary。　　All　was

right　in　his　world　has　he　sat　with　her；　reading　Maurice　Maeterlinck's　Alladine

and　Palomides。　　The　sorrowful　light　of　the　gas…jet　might　have　been　May　morning

sunshine　flashing　amber　and　rose　through　the　glowing　windows　of　the

Sainte…Chapelle；　it　was　so　bright　for　Bibbs。　　And　while　the　zinc…eater　held

out　to　bring　him　such　golden　nights　as　these；　all　the　king's　horses　and　all

the　king's　men　might　not　serve　to　break　the　spell。



Bibbs　read　slowly；　but　in　a　reasonable　manner；　as　if　he　were　talking；　and

Mary；　looking　at　him　steadily　from　beneath　her　curved　fingers；　appeared　to

discover　no　fault。　　It　had　grown　to　be　her　habit　to　look　at　him　whenever　there

was　an　opportunity。　　It　may　be　said；　in　truth；　that　while　they　were　together；

and　it　was　light；　she　looked　at　him　all　the　time。



When　he　came　to　the　end　of　Alladine　and　Palomides　they　were　silent　a　little

while；　considering　together；　then　he　turned　back　the　pages　and　said：　　〃There's

something　I　want　to　read　over。　　This：



　　　　　　　You　would　think　I　threw　a　window　open　on　the　dawn。。。She　has　a　soul

　　　　　　　that　can　be　seen　around　herthat　takes　you　in　its　arms　like　an

　　　　　　　ailing　child　and　without　saying　anything　to　you　consoles　you　for

　　　　　　　everything。。。。　　I　shall　never　understand　it　all。　　I　do　not　know

　　　　　　　how　it　can　all　be；　but　my　knees　bend　in　spite　of　me　when　I　speak

　　　　　　　of　it　。。。



He　stopped　and　looked　at　her。



〃You　boy！〃　said　Mary；　not　very　clearly。



〃Oh　yes；〃　he　returned。　　〃But　it's　trueespecially　my　knees！〃



〃You　boy！〃　she　murmured　again；　blushing　charmingly。　　〃You　might　read　another

line　over。　　The　first　time　I　ever　saw　you；　Bibbs；　you　were　looking　into　a

mirror。　　Do　it　again。　　But　you　needn't　read　itI　can　give　it　to　you：　〃A

little　Greek　slave　that　came　from　the　heart　of　Arcady！〃



〃I！　　I'm　one　of　the　hands　at　the　Pump　Worksand　going　to　stay　one；　unless　I

have　to　decide　to　study　plumbing。〃



〃No。〃　　She　shook　her　head。　　〃You　love　and　want　what's　beautiful　and　delicate

and　serene；　it's　really　art　that　you　want　in　your　life；　and　have　always

wanted。　　You　seemed　to　me；　from　the　first；　the　most　wistful　person　I　had　ever

known；　and　that's　what　you　were　wistful　for。〃



Bibbs　looked　doubtful　and　more　wistful　than　ever；　but　after　a　moment　or　two

the　matter　seemed　to　clarify　itself　to　him。　　〃Why；　no；〃　he　said；　〃I　wanted

something　else　more　than　that。　　I　wanted　you。〃



〃And　here　I　am！〃　she　laughed；　completely　understanding。　〃I　think　we're　like

those　two　in　The　Cloister　and　the　Hearth。　　I'm　just　the　rough　Burgundian

cross…bow　man；　Denys；　who　followed　that　gentle　Gerard　and　told　everybody　that

the　devil　was　dead。〃



〃He　isn't；　though；〃　said　Bibbs；　as　a　hoarse　little　bell　in　the　next　room　began

a　series　of　snappings　which　proved　to　be　ten；　upon　count。　　〃He　gets　into　the

clock　whenever　I'm　with　you。〃　　And；　sighing　deeply；　he　rose　to　go。



〃You're　always　very　prompt　about　leaving　me。〃



〃II　try　to　be；〃　he　said。　　〃It　isn't　easy　to　be　careful　not　to　risk

everything　by　giving　myself　a　little　more　at　a　time。　　If　I　ever　saw　you　look

tired〃



〃Have　you　ever？〃



〃Not　yet。　　You　always　lookyou　always　look〃



〃How？〃



〃Care…free。　　That's　it。　　Except　when　you　feel　sorry　for　me　about　something；

you　always　have　that　splendid　look。　　It　puts　courage　into　people　to　see　it。

If　I　had　a　struggle　to　face　I'd　keep　remembering　that　lookand　I'd　never　give

up！　　It's　a　brave　look；　too；　as　though　gaiety　might　be　a　kind　of　gallantry　on

your　part；　and　yet　I　don't　quite　understand　why　it　should　be；　either。〃　　He

smiled　quizzically；　looking　down　upon　her。　　〃Mary；　you　haven't　a　'secret

sorrow；'　have　you？〃



For　answer　she　only　laughed。



〃No；〃　he　said；　〃I　can't　imagine　you　with　a　care　in　the　world。　　I　think　that's

why　you　were　so　kind　to　meyou　have　nothing　but　happiness　in　your　own　life；

and　so　you　could　spare　time　to　make　my　troubles　turn　to　happiness；　too。　　But

there's　one　little　time　in　the　twenty…four　hours　when　I'm　not　happy。　　It's

now；　when　I　have　to　say　good　night。　　I　feel　dismal　every　time　it　comesand

then；　when　I've　left　the　house；　there's　a　bad　little　blankness；　a　black　void；

as　though　I　were　temporarily　dead；　and　it　lasts　until　I　get　it　established　in

my　mind　that　I'm　really　beginning　another　day　that's　to　end　with　YOU　again。

Then　I　cheer　up。　　But　now's　the　bad　timeand　I　must　go　through　it；　and

sogood　night。〃　　And　he　added　with　a　pungent　vehemence　of　which　he　was　little

aware；　〃I　hate　it！〃



〃Do　you？〃　she　said；　rising　to　go　to　the　door　with　him。　　But　he　stood

motionless；　gazing　at　her　wonderingly。



〃Mary！　　Your　eyes　are　so〃　　He　stopped。



〃Yes？〃　　But　she　looked　quickly　away。



〃I　don't　know；〃　he　said。　　〃I　thought　just　then〃



〃What　did　you　think？〃



〃I　don't　knowit　seemed　to　me　that　there　was　something　I　ought　to

understandand　didn't。〃



She　laughed　and　met　his　wondering　gaze　again　frankly。　　〃My　eyes　are　pleased；〃

she　said。　　〃I'm　glad　that　you　miss　me　a　little　after　you　go。〃



〃But　to…morrow's　coming　faster　than　other　days　if　you'll　let　it；〃　he　said。



She　inclined　her　head。　　〃Yes。　　I'll'let　it'！〃



〃Going　to　church；〃　said　Bibbs。　　〃It　IS　going　to　church　when　I　go　with　you！〃



She　went　to　the　front　door　with　him；　she　always　went　that　far。　　They　had

formed　a　little　code　of　leave…taking；　by　habit；　neither　of　them　ever　speaking

of　it；　but　it　was　always　the　same。　　She　always　stood　in　the　doorway　until　he

reached　the　sidewalk；　and　there　he　always　turned　and　looked　back；　and　she

waved　her　hand　to　him。　　Then　he　went　on；　halfway　to　the　New　House；　and　looked

back　again；　and　Mary　was　not　in　the　doorway；　but　the　door　was　open　and　the

light　shone。　　It　was　as　if　she　meant　to　tell　him　that　she　would　never　shut　him

out；　he　could　always　see　that　friendly　light　of　the　open　doorwayas　if　it

were　open　for　him　to　come　back；　if　he　would。　　He　could　see　it　until　a　wing　of

the　New　House　came　between；　when　he　went　up　the　path。　　The　open　doorway　seemed

to　him　the　beautiful　symbol　of　her　friendshipof　her　thought　of　him；　a　symbol

of　herself　and　of　her　ineffable　kindness。



And　she　kep