the cost-第40章
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〃The best way is for you to read it；〃 he said。 It was a letter to him from Fanshaw。 He was writing； he explained； because the discharge of a painful duty to himself would compel him 〃to give pain to your daughter whom I esteem highly；〃 and he thought it only right 〃to prepare her and her family for what was coming； in order that they might be ready to take the action that would suggest itself。〃 And he went on to relate his domestic troubles and his impending suit。
〃Poor Leonora！〃 murmured Pauline； as she finished and sat thinking of all that Fanshaw's letter involved。
〃Is it true； Polly？〃 asked her father。
She gave a great sigh of relief。 How easy this letter had made all that she had been dreading！ 〃Yesit's true；〃 she replied。 〃I've known aboutabout it ever since the time I came back from the East and didn't return。〃
The habitual pallor of her father's face changed to gray。
〃I left him； father。〃 She lifted her head； impatient of her stammering。 A bright flush was in her face as she went on rapidly： 〃And I came to…day to tell you the whole storyto be truthful and honest again。 I'm sick of deception and evasion。 I can't stand it any longerI mustn't。 Iyou don't know how I've shrunk from wounding mother and you。 But I've no choice now。 Father； I must be freefree！〃
〃And you shall be；〃 replied her father。 〃He shall not wreck your life and Gardiner's。〃
Pauline stared at him。 〃Father！〃 she exclaimed。
He put his arm round her and drew her gently to him。
〃I know the idea is repellent；〃 he said； as if he were trying to persuade a child。 〃But it's right； Pauline。 There are cases in which not to divorce would be a sin。 I hope my daughter sees that this is one。〃
〃I don't understand；〃 she said confusedly。 〃I thought you and mother believed divorce was dreadfulno matter what might happen。〃
〃We did； Pauline。 But wethat is； Ihad never had it brought home。 A hint of this story was published just after you came last year。 I thought it false； but it set me to thinking。 ‘If your daughter's husband had turned out to be as you once thought him； would it be right for her to live on with him？ To live a lie； to pretend to keep her vows to love and honor him？ Would it be right to condemn Gardiner to be poisoned by such a father？' And at last I saw the truth； and your mother agreed with me。 We had been too narrow。 We had been laying down our own notions as God's great justice。〃
Pauline drew away from her father so that she could look at him。 And at last she saw into his heart。 〃If I had only known；〃 she said； and sat numb and stunned。
〃When you were coming home from college；〃 her father went on； 〃your mother and I talked over what we should do。 John had just confessed your secret marriage〃
〃You knew that！〃
〃Yes； and we understood； Polly。 You were so youngso headstrongand you couldn't appreciate our reasons。〃
Pauline's brain was reeling。
〃Your mother and I talked it over before you got home and thought it best to leave you entirely free to choose。 But when we saw you overcome by joy〃
〃Don't！〃 she interrupted； her voice a cry of pain。 〃I can't bear it！ Don't！〃 Years of false self…sacrifice； of deceiving her parents and her child； of self…suppression and self…degradation； and this final cruelty to Gladysall； all in vain； all a heaping of folly upon folly； of wrong upon wrong。
She rushed toward the house。 She must fly somewhereanywhereto escape the thoughts that were picking with sharp beaks at her aching heart。 Half…way up the walk she turned and fled to a refuge she would not have thought of half an hour before to her father's arms。
〃Oh； father；〃 she cried。 〃If I had only known you！〃
Gladys； returning from her walk； went directly to Pauline's sitting…room。
〃I'm off for New York and Europe to…morrow morning；〃 she began abruptly； her voice hard； her expression bitter and reckless。
〃Where can she have heard about Leonora？〃 thought Pauline。 She said in a strained voice： 〃I had hoped you would stay here to look after the house。〃
〃To look after the house？ What do you mean？〃 asked Gladys。 But she was too full of herself to be interested in the answer； and went on： 〃I want you to forget what I said to you。 I've got over all that。 I've come to my senses。〃
Pauline began a nervous turning of her rings。
Gladys gave a short； grim laugh。 〃I detest him；〃 she went on。 〃We're very changeable； we women； aren't we？ I went out of this house two hours ago loving himto distraction。 I came back hating him。 And all that has happened in between is that I met him and he kissed me a few times and stabbed my pride a few times。〃
Pauline stopped turning her ringsshe rose slowly； mechanically； looked straight at Gladys。
〃That is not true；〃 she said calmly。
Gladys laughed sardonically。 〃You don't know the cold and haughty Governor Scarborough。 There's fire under the ice。 I can feel the places on my face where it scorched。 Can't you see them？〃
Pauline gave her a look of disgust。 〃How like John Dumont's sister！〃 she thought。 And she shut herself in her room and stayed there； pleading illness in excuse； until Gladys was gone。
XXIII。
A SEA SURPRISE。
On the third day from New York； Gladys was so far recovered from seasickness that she dragged herself to the deck。 The water was fairly smooth； but a sticky； foggy rain was falling。 A deck…steward put her steamer…chair in a sheltered corner。 Her maid and a stewardess swathed her in capes and rugs； she closed her eyes and said： 〃Now leave me； please； and don't come near me till I send for you。〃
She slept an hour。 When she awoke she felt better。 Some one had drawn a chair beside hers and was seated therea man； for she caught the faint odor of a pipe； though the wind was the other way。 She turned her head。 It was Langdon； whom she had not seen since she went below a few hours after Sandy Hook disappeared。 Indeed； she had almost forgotten that he was on board and that her brother had asked him to look after her。 He was staring at her in an absent…minded way； his wonted expression of satire and lazy good…humor fainter than usual。 In fact； his face was almost serious。
〃That pipe；〃 she grumbled。 〃Please do put it away。〃
He tossed it into the sea。 〃Beg pardon；〃 he said。 〃It was stupid of me。 I was absorbed inin my book。〃
〃What's the name of it？〃
He turned it to glance at the cover； but she went on： 〃Nodon't tell me。 I've no desire to know。 I asked merely to confirm my suspicion。〃
〃You're right；〃 he said。 〃I wasn't reading。 I was looking at you。〃
〃That was impertinent。 A man should not look at a woman when she doesn't intend him to look。〃
〃Then I'd never look at all。 I'm interested only in things not meant for my eyes。 I might even read letters not addressed to me if I didn't know how dull letters are。 No intelligent person ever says anything in a letter nowadays。 They use the telegraph for ordinary correspondence； and telepathy for the other kind。 But it was interestinglooking at you as you lay asleep。〃
〃Was my mouth open？〃
〃A little。〃
〃Am I yellow？〃
〃Very。〃
〃Eyes red？ Hair in strings？ Lips blue？〃
〃All that；〃 he said； 〃and skin somewhat mottled。 But I was not so much interested in your beauty as I was in trying to determine whether you were well enough to stand two shocks。〃
〃I need them；〃 replied Gladys。
〃One is rather unpleasant； the otherthe reverse； in fact a happiness。〃
〃The unpleasant first； please。〃
〃Certainly；〃 he replied。 〃Always the medicine first； then the candy。〃 And he leaned back and closed his eyes and seemed to be settling himself for indefinite silence。
〃Go on；〃 she said impatiently。 〃What's the medicine？ A death？〃
〃I said unpleasant； didn't I？ When an enemy dies it's all joy。 When a friend passes over to eternal bliss； why； being good Christians； we are not so faithless and selfish as to let the momentary separation distress us。〃
〃But what is it？ You're trying to gain time by all this beating about the bush。 You ought to know me well enough to know you can speak straight out。〃
〃Fanshaw's suing his wife for divorceand he names Jack。〃
〃Is that your news？〃 said Gladys； languidly
