introductory-第7章
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away out of my mind。 A gift; a faculty; if it had not departed; was
suspended and inanimate within me。 There would have been something
sad; unutterably dreary; in all this; had I not been conscious that it
lay at my own option to recall whatever was valuable in the past。 It
might be true; indeed; that this was a life which could not; with
impunity; be lived too long; else; it might make me permanently
other than I had been; without transforming me into any shape which it
would be worth my while to take。 But I never considered it as other
than a transitory life。 There was always a prophetic instinct; a low
whisper in my ear; that; within no long period; and whenever a new
change of custom should be essential to my good; a change would come。
Meanwhile; there I was; a Surveyor of the Revenue; and; so far as
I have been able to understand; as good a Surveyor as need be。 A man
of thought; fancy; and sensibility (had he ten times the Surveyor's
proportion of those qualities) may; at any time; be a man of
affairs; if he will only choose to give himself the trouble。 My
fellow…officers; and the merchants and sea…captains with whom my
official duties brought me into any manner of connection; viewed me in
no other light; and probably knew me in no other character。 None of
them; I presume; had ever read a page of my inditing; or would have
cared a fig the more for me; if they had read them all; nor would it
have mended the matter; in the least; had those same unprofitable
pages been written with a pen like that of Burns or of Chaucer; each
of whom was a Custom…House officer in his day; as well as I。 It is a
good lesson… though it may often be a hard one… for a man who has
dreamed of literary fame; and of making for himself a rank among the
world's dignitaries by such means; to step aside out of the narrow
circle in which his claims are recognised; and to find how utterly
devoid of significance; beyond that circle; is all that he achieves;
and all he aims at。 I know not that I especially needed the lesson;
either in the way of warning or rebuke; but; at any rate; I learned it
thoroughly: nor; it gives me pleasure to reflect; did the truth; as it
came home to my perception; ever cost me a pang; or require to be
thrown off in a sigh。 In the way of literary talk; it is true; the
Naval Officer… an excellent fellow; who came into office with me and
went out only a little later… would often engage me in a discussion
about one or the other of his favourite topics; Napoleon or
Shakespeare。 The Collector's junior clerk; too… a young gentleman who;
it was whispered; occasionally covered a sheet of Uncle Sam's
letter…paper with what (at the distance of a few yards) looked very
much like poetry… used now and then to speak to me of books; as
matters with which I might possibly be conversant。 This was my all
of lettered intercourse; and it was quite sufficient for my
necessities。
No longer seeking nor caring that my name should be blazoned
abroad on title…pages; I smiled to think that it had now another
kind of vogue。 The Custom…House marker imprinted it; with a stencil
and black paint; on pepper…bags; and baskets of anatto; and
cigar…boxes; and bales of all kinds of dutiable merchandise; in
testimony that these commodities had paid the impost; and gone
regularly through the office。 Borne on such queer vehicle of fame; a
knowledge of my existence; so far as a name conveys it; was carried
where it had never been before; and; I hope; will never go again。
But the past was not dead。 Once in a great while; the thoughts; that
had seemed so vital and so active; yet had been put to rest so
quietly; revived again。 One of the most remarkable occasions; when the
habit of bygone days awoke in me; was that which brings it within
the law of literary propriety to offer the public the sketch which I
am now writing。
In the second story of the Custom…House; there is a large room; in
which the brick…work and naked rafters have never been covered with
panelling and plaster。 The edifice… originally projected on a scale
adapted to the old commercial enterprise of the port; and with an idea
of subsequent prosperity destined never to be realised… contains far
more space than its occupants know what to do with。 This airy hall;
therefore; over the Collector's apartments; remains unfinished to this
day; and; in spite of the aged cobwebs that festoon its dusky beams;
appears still to await the labour of the carpenter and mason。 At one
end of the room; in a recess; were a number of barrels; piled one upon
another; containing bundles of official documents。 Large quantities of
similar rubbish lay lumbering the floor。 It was sorrowful to think how
many days; and weeks; and months; and years of toil; had been wasted
on these musty papers; which were now only an encumbrance on earth;
and were hidden away in this forgotten corner; never more to be
glanced at by human eyes。 But; then; what reams of other
manuscripts… filled not with the dulness of official formalities;
but with the thought of inventive brains and the rich effusion of deep
hearts… had gone equally to oblivion; and that; moreover; without
serving a purpose in their day; as these heaped…up papers had; and…
saddest of all… without purchasing for their writers the comfortable
livelihood which the clerks of the Custom…House had gained by these
worthless scratchings of the pen! Yet not altogether worthless;
perhaps; as materials of local history。 Here; no doubt; statistics
of the former commerce of Salem might be discovered; and memorials
of her princely merchants… old King Derby; old Billy Gray; old Simon
Forrester; and many another magnate in his day… whose powdered head;
however; was scarcely in the tomb; before his mountain…pile of
wealth began to dwindle。 The founders of the greater part of the
families which now compose the aristocracy of Salem might here be
traced; from the petty and obscure beginnings of their traffic; at
periods generally much posterior to the Revolution; upward to what
their children look upon as long…established rank。
Prior to the Revolution; there is a dearth of records; the earlier
documents and archives of the Custom…House having; probably; been
carried off to Halifax; when all the King's officials accompanied
the British army in its flight from Boston。 It has often been a matter
of regret with me; for; going back; perhaps; to the days of the
Protectorate; those papers must have contained many references to
forgotten or remembered men; and to antique customs; which would
have affected me with the same pleasure as when I used to pick up
Indian arrow…heads in the field near the Old Manse。
But; one idle and rainy day; it was my fortune to make a discovery
of some little interest。 Poking and burrowing into the heaped…up
rubbish in the corner; unfolding one and another document; and reading
the names of vessels that had long ago foundered at sea or rotted at
the wharves; and those of merchants; never heard of now on 'Change;
nor very readily decipherable on their mossy tombstones; glancing at
such matters with the saddened; weary; half…reluctant interest which
we bestow on the corpse of dead activity… and exerting my fancy;
sluggish with little use; to raise up from these dry bones an image of
the old town's brighter aspect; when India was a new region; and
only Salem knew the way thither… I chanced to lay my hand on a small
package; carefully done up in a piece of ancient yellow parchment。
This envelope had the air of an official record of some period long
past; when clerks engrossed their stiff and formal chirography on more
substantial materials than at present。 There was something about it
that quickened an instinctive curiosity; and made me undo the faded
red tape; that tied up the package; with the sense that a treasure
would here be brought to light。 Unbending the rigid folds of the
parchment cover; I found it to be a commission; under the