the price she paid-第18章
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position。 I wonder if you can help me?''
Harding; a young man and of one of the best blond types; said: ‘‘No doubt I canand I'll be glad to。''
‘‘The fact is'' Her voice was trembling with nervousness。 She opened the gold bag; took out the little silver pieces and the big copper piece; extended her pink palm with them upon it‘‘there's all I've got left of the money I brought with me。''
Harding gazed at the exhibit tranquilly。 He was chiefly remarkable for his perfect self…possession。 Said he: ‘‘Do you wish me to cash a check for you?''
The stupidity of men! Tears of vexation gathered in her eyes。 When she could speak she faltered:
‘‘No。''
He was looking at her nowa grave; kind glance。
She somehow felt encouraged and heartened。 She went on: ‘‘I was hopingthatthat the gen that my husband had said something to you and that you perhaps had not thought to say anything to me。''
Their glances met; his movingly sympathetic and understanding; hers piteously forlornthe look of a lovely girl; stranded and friendless in a far strange land。 Presently he said gently:
‘‘Yes; he told me to say something to youif you should speak to me about this matter。'' His tone caused in her heart a horrible stillness of suspense。 He went on: ‘‘He saidI give you his exact words: ‘If my wife should ask you for money; tell her my ideas on the subject。' ''
A pause。 She started up; crimson; her glance darting nervously this way and that to avoid his。 ‘‘Never mind。 Really; it's of no importance。 Thank you I'll get on very wellI'm sorry to have troubled you''
‘‘Pardon me; Mrs。 Siddall;'' he interposed; ‘‘but I think you'd best let me finish。''
She started to protest; she tried to move toward the door。 Her strength failed her; she sat down; waited; nervously clasping and unclasping the costly; jewel… embroidered bag。
‘‘He has explained to me; many times;'' continued Harding; ‘‘that he believes women do not understand the value of money and ought not to be trusted with it。 He proposes to provide everything for you; every comfort and luxuryI am using his own language; Mrs。 Siddalland he has open accounts at the principal shops in every city where you will goNew York; Washington; Chicago; Denver; Paris; London; Rome。 He says you are at liberty to get practically anything you please at these shops; and he will pay the bills。 He thus entirely spares you the necessity of ever spending any money。 Should you see anything you wish at some shop where he has no account; you can have it sent collect; and I or my assistant; Mr。 Drawl; will settle for it。 All he asks is that you use discretion in this freedom。 He says it would be extremely painful to him to have to withdraw it。''
Harding had pronounced this long speech in a dry monotonous voice; like one reading mechanically from a dull book。 As Mildred listened; her thoughts began to whirl about the central idea until she fell into a kind of stupor。 When he finished she was staring vacantly at the bag in her lapthe bag she was holding open wide。
Harding continued: ‘‘He also instructed me to say something about his formerhis experiences。 The first Mrs。 Siddall he married when he was very young and poor。 As he grew rich; she became madly extravagant。 And as they had started on a basis on which she had free access to his money he could not check her。 The result; finally; was a succession of bitter quarrels; and they were about to divorce when she died。 He made the second Mrs。 Siddall an allowance; a liberal allowance。 Her follies compelled him to withdraw it。 She resorted to underhanded means to get money from him without his knowing it。 He detected the fraud。 After a series of disagreeable incidents she committed the indiscretion which caused him to divorce her。 He says that these experiences have convinced him that''
‘‘The second Mrs。 Siddall;'' interrupted Mildred; ‘‘is she still alive?''
Harding hesitated。 ‘‘Yes;'' he said reluctantly。
‘‘Is shepoor?'' asked Mildred。
‘‘I should prefer not to''
‘‘Did the general forbid you to tell me?''
‘‘On the contrary; he instructed me But I'd rather not talk about it; Mrs。 Siddall。''
‘‘Is she poor?'' repeated Mildred。
‘‘Yes。''
‘‘What became of her?''
A long pause。 Then Harding said: ‘‘She was a poor girl when the general married her。 After the divorce she lived for a while with the man。 But he had nothing。 They separated。 She tried various kinds of workand other things。 Since she lost her looks She writes from time to time; asking for money。''
‘‘Which she never gets?'' said Mildred。
‘‘Which she never gets;'' said Harding。 ‘‘Lately she was cashier or head waitress in a cheap restaurant in St。 Louis。''
After a long silence Mildred said: ‘‘I understand。 I understand。'' She drew a long breath。 ‘‘I shall understand better as time goes on; but I understand fairly well now。''
‘‘I need not tell you; Mrs。 Siddall;'' said Harding in his gentle; tranquil way; ‘‘that the general is the kindest and most generous of men; but he has his own methods as who has not?''
Mildred had forgotten that he was therenot a difficult matter; when he had in its perfection the secretarial manner of complete self…effacement。 Said she reflectively; like one puzzling out a difficult problem:
‘‘He buys a woman; as he buys a dog or a horse。 He does not give his dog; his horse; pocket…money。 Why should he give his woman pocket…money?''
‘‘Will it help matters; Mrs。 Siddall; to go to the other extreme and do him a grave injustice?''
She did not hear。 At the picture presented to her mind by her own thoughts she gave a short satirical laugh。 ‘‘How stupid of me not to have understood from the outset;'' said she。 ‘‘Why; I've often heard of this very thing。''
‘‘It is more and more the custom among men of large property; I believe;'' said Harding。 ‘‘Perhaps; Mrs。 Siddall; you would not blame them if you were in their position。 The rich men who are carelessthey ruin everybody about them; I assure you。 I've seen it again and again。''
But the young wife was absorbed in her own thoughts。 Harding; feeling her mood; did not interrupt。 After a while she said:
‘‘I must ask you some questions。 These jewels the general has been buying''
Harding made a movement of embarrassment and protest。 She smiled ironically and went on:
‘‘One moment; please。 Every time I wish to wear any of them I have to go to him to get them。 He asks me to return them when I am undressing。 He says it is safer to keep everything in his strong box。 I have been assuming that that was the only reason。 I begin to suspect Am I right; Mr。 Harding?''
‘‘Really I can't say; Mrs。 Siddall;'' said Harding。 ‘‘These are not matters to discuss with me; if you will permit me to say so。''
‘‘Oh; yes; they are;'' replied she laughingly。 ‘‘Aren't we all in the same boat?all employes of the general?''
Harding made no reply。
Mildred was beside herself with a kind of rage that; because outlet was necessary and because raving against the little general would be absolutely futile; found outlet in self…mockery and reckless sarcasm。
‘‘I understand about the jewels; too;'' she went on。 ‘‘They are not mine。 Nothing is mine。 Everything; including myself; belongs to him。 If I give satisfaction in the position for which I've been hired for my board and clothes; I may continue to eat the general's food and sleep in the general's house and wear the general's jewels and dresses and ride in the general's traps and be waited on by the general's servants。 If I don't like my place or he doesn't like my way of filling it''she laughed merrily; mockingly‘‘out I gointo the streetsafter the second Mrs。 Siddall。 And the general will hire a new'' She paused; cast about for a word in vain; appealed to the secretary; ‘‘What would you call it; Mr。 Harding?''
Harding rose; looking at her with a very soothing tranquillity。 ‘‘If I were you; Mrs。 Siddall;'' said he; ‘‘I should get into the auto and go for a long drive out to the Boisout to Versaillesa long; long drive。 I should be gone four or five hours at least; and I should look at the thing from all sides。 Especially; I'd look at it from HIS standpoint。''
Mildred; somewhat qui