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第67章

april hopes-第67章

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peril; to her breast; and between her kissing and crying she repeated her
accusals and denunciations with violent volubility。

Dan could not have replied to them in that effusion of gratitude and
tenderness he felt for his mother's partisanship; and when she went on in
almost the very terms of his self…defence; and told him that he had done
as he had because it was easy for him to yield; and he could not imagine a
Cat who would put her daughter up to entrapping him into a promise that
she knew must break his mother's heart; he found her so right on the main
point that he could not help some question of Mrs。 Pasmer in his soul。
Could she really have been at the bottom of it all?  She was very sly; and
she might be very false; and it was certainly she who had first proposed
their going abroad together。  It looked as if it might be as his mother
said; and at any rate it was no time to dispute her; and he did not say a
word in behalf of Mrs。 Pasmer; whom she continued to rend in a thousand
pieces and scatter to the winds till she had to stop breathless。

〃Yes! it's quite as I expected!  She did everything she could to trap you
into it。  She fairly flung that poor girl at you。  She laid her plans so
that you couldn't say noshe understood your character from the start!
and then; when it came out by accident; and she saw that she had older
heads to deal with; and you were not going to be quite at her mercy; she
dropped the mask in an instant; and made Alice break with you。  Oh; I
could see through her from the beginning!  And the next time; Dan; I
advise you; as you never suspect anybody yourself; to consult with
somebody who doesn't take people for what they seem; and not to let
yourself be flattered out of your sensor; even if you see your father is。〃

Mrs。 Mavering dropped back on her pillow; and her husband smiled patiently
at their daughter。

Dan saw his patient smile and understood it; and the injustice which his
father bore made him finally unwilling to let another remain under it。
Hard as it was to oppose his mother in anything when she was praising him
so sweetly and comforting him in the moment of his need; he pulled himself
together to protest: 〃No; no; mother!  I don't think Mrs。 Pasmer was to
blame; I don't believe she had anything to do with it。  She's always stood
my friend〃

〃Oh; I've no doubt she's made you think so; Dan;〃 said his mother; with
unabated fondness for him; 〃and you think so because you're so simple and
good; and never suspect evil of any one。  It's this hideous optimism
that's killing everything'

A certain note in the invalid's falling voice seemed to warn her hearers
of an impending change that could do no one good。  Eunice rose hastily and
interrupted: 〃Mother; Mr。 Boardman's here。  He came up with Dan。  May
Minnie come in with him?〃

Mrs。 Mavering shot a glance of inquiry at Dan; and then let a swift
inspection range over all the details of the room; and finally concentrate
itself on the silk and lace of her bed; over which she passed a smoothing
hand。  〃Mr。 Boardman?〃 she cried; with instantly recovered amiability。 〃Of
course she may!〃




XLVII。

In Boston the rumour of Dan's broken engagement was followed promptly by a
denial of it; both the rumour and the denial were apparently
authoritative; but it gives the effect of a little greater sagacity to
distrust rumours of all kinds; and most people went to bed; after the teas
and dinners and receptions and clubs at which the fact was first debated;
in the self…persuasion that it was not so。  The next day they found the
rumour still persistent; the denial was still in the air too; but it
seemed weaker; at the end of the third day it had become a question as to
which broke the engagement; and why; by the end of a week it was known
that Alice had broken the engagement; but the reason could not be
ascertained。

This was not for want of asking; more or less direct。  Pasmer; of course;
went and came at his club with perfect immunity。  Men are quite as curious
as women; but they set business bounds to their curiosity; and do not
dream of passing these。  With women who have no business of their own; and
can not quell themselves with the reflection that this thing or that is
not their affair; there is no question so intimate that they will not put
it to some other woman; perhaps it is not so intimate; or perhaps it will
not seem so; at any rate; they chance it。  Mrs。 Pasmer was given every
opportunity to explain the facts to the ladies whom she met; and if she
was much afflicted by Alice's behaviour; she had a measure of consolation
in using her skill to baffle the research of her acquaintance。  After each
encounter of the kind she had the pleasure of reflecting that absolutely
nothing more than she meant had become known。  The case never became fully
known through her; it was the girl herself who told it to Miss Cotton in
one of those moments of confidence which are necessary to burdened minds;
and it is doubtful if more than two or three people ever clearly
understood it; most preferred one or other of several mistaken versions
which society finally settled down to。

The paroxysm of self…doubt; almost self…accusal; in which Alice came to
Miss Cotton; moved the latter to the deepest sympathy; and left her with
misgivings which became an intolerable anguish to her conscience。  The
child was so afflicted at what she had done; not because she wished to be
reconciled with her lover; but because she was afraid she had been unjust;
been cruelly impatient and peremptory with him; she seemed to Miss Cotton
so absolutely alone and friendless with her great trouble; she was so
helpless; so hopeless; she was so anxious to do right; and so fearful she
had done wrong; that Miss Cotton would not have been Miss Cotton if she
had not taken her in her arms and assured her that in everything she had
done she had been sublimely and nobly right; a lesson to all her sex in
such matters for ever。  She told her that she had always admired her; but
that now she idolised her; that she felt like going down on her knees and
simply worshipping her。

〃Oh; don't say that; Miss Cotton!〃 pleaded Alice; pulling away from her
embrace; but still clinging to her with her tremulous; cold little hands。
〃I can't bear it!  I'm wicked and hard you don't know how bad I am; and
I'm afraid of being weak; of doing more harm yet。  Oh; I wronged him
cruelly in ever letting him get engaged to me!  But now what you've said
will support me。  If you think I've done rightIt must seem strange to
you that I should come to you with my trouble instead of my mother; but
I've been to her; andand we think alike on so few subjects; don't you
know〃

〃Yes; yes; I know; dear!〃 said Miss Cotton; in the tender folly of her
heart; with the satisfaction which every woman feels in being more
sufficient to another in trouble than her natural comforters。

〃And I wanted to know how you saw it; and now; if you feel as you say; I
can never doubt myself again。〃

She tempested out of Miss Cotton's house; all tearful under the veil she
had pulled down; and as she shut the door of her coupe; Miss Cotton's
heart jumped into her throat with an impulse to run after her; to recall
her; to recant; to modify everything。

From that moment Miss Cotton's trouble began; and it became a torment that
mounted and gave her no peace till she imparted it。  She said to herself
that she should suffer to the utmost in this matter; and if she spoke to
any one; it must not be to same one who had agreed with her about Alice;
but to some hard; skeptical nature; some one who would look at it from a
totally different point of view; and would punish her for her error; if
she had committed an error; in supporting and consoling Alice。  All the
time she was thinking of Mrs。 Brinkley; Mrs。 Brinkley had come into her
mind at once; but it was only after repeated struggles that she could get
the strength to go to her。

Mrs。 Brinkley; sacredly pledged to secrecy; listened with a sufficiently
dismaying air to the story which Miss Cotton told her in the extremity of
her fear and doubt。

〃Well;〃 she said at the end; 〃have you written to

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