april hopes-第40章

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same　breakfast　after　his　acceptance　as　he　had　ordered　after　his　rejection；
he　would　tell　Alice　about　it；　and　it　would　amuse　her。　　He　imagined　how　he
would　say　it；　and　she　would　laugh；　but　she　would　be　full　of　a　ravishing
compassion　for　his　past　suffering。　　They　were　long　bringing　the　breakfast；
when　it　came　he　despatched　it　so　quickly　that　it　was　only　half　after　eight
when　he　paid　his　check　at　the　counter。　　He　tried　to　be　five　minutes　more
getting　his　flowers；　but　the　man　had　them　all　ready　for　him；　and　it　did
not　take　him　ten　seconds。　　He　had　said　he　would　carry　them　at　half…past
nine；　but　thinking　it　over　on　a　bench　in　the　Garden；　he　decided　that　he
had　better　go　sooner；　they　might　breakfast　earlier；　and　there　would　be　no
fun　if　Alice　did　not　find　the　roses　beside　her　plate：　that　was　the　whole
idea。　　It　was　not　till　he　stood　at　the　door　of　the　Pasmer　apartment　that。
he　reflected　that　he　was　not　accomplishing　his　wish　to　see　Alice　by
leaving　her　those　flowers；　he　was　a　fool；　for　now　he　would　have　to
postpone　coming　a　little；　because　he　had　already　come。

The　girl　who　answered　the　bell　did　not　understand　the　charge　he　gave　her
about　the　roses；　and　he　repeated　his　words。　　Some　one　passing　through　the
room　beyond　seemed　to　hesitate　and　pause　at　the　sound　of　his　voice。　　Could
it　be　Alice？　　Then　he　should　see　her；　after　all！　　The　girl　looked　over　her
shoulder；　and　said；　〃Mrs。　Pasmer。〃

Mrs。　Pasmer　came　forward；　and　he　fell　into　a　complicated　explanation　and
apology。　　At　the　end　she　said；　〃You　had　better　give　them　yourself。　　She
will　be　here　directly。〃　　They　were　in　the　room　now；　and　Mrs。　Pasmer　made
the　time　pass　in　rapid　talk；　but　Dan　felt　that　he　ought　to　apologise　from
time　to　time。　　〃No！〃　she　said；　letting　herself　go。　　〃Stay　and　breakfast
with　us；　Mr。　Mavering。　　We　shall　be　so　glad　to　have　you。〃

At　last　Alice　came　in；　and　they　decorously　shook　hands。　　Mrs。　Pasmer
turned　away　a　smile　at　their　decorum。　　〃I　will　see　that　there's　a　place
for　you；〃　she　said；　leaving　them。

They　were　instantly　in　each　other's　arms。　　It　seemed　to　him　that　all　this
had　happened　because　he　had　so　strongly　wished　it。

〃What　is　it；　Dan？〃　　What　did　you　come　for？〃　she　asked。

〃To　see　if　it　was　really　true；　Alice。　　I　couldn't　believe　it。〃

〃Welllet　me　goyou　mustn'tit's　too　silly。　　Of　course　it's　true。〃　　She
pulled　herself　free。　　〃Is　my　hair　tumbled？　　You　oughtn't　to　have　come；
it's　ridiculous；　but　I'm　glad　you　came。　　I've　been　thinking　it　all　over；
and　I've　got　a　great　many　things　to　say　to　you。　　But　come　to　breakfast
now。〃

She　had　a　business…like　way　of　treating　the　situation　that　was　more
intoxicating　than　sentiment　would　have　been；　and　gave　it　more　actuality。

Mrs。　Pasmer　was　alone　at　the　table；　and　explained　that　Alice's　father
never　breakfasted　with　them；　or　very　seldom。　　〃Where　are　your　flowers？〃
she　asked　Alice。

〃Flowers？　　What　flowers？〃

〃That　Mr。　Mavering　brought。〃

They　all　looked　at　one　another。　　Dan　ran　out　and　brought　in　his　roses。

〃They　were　trying　to　get　away　in　the　excitement；　I　guess；　Mrs。　Pasmer；　I
found　them　behind　the　door。〃　　He　had　flung　them　there；　without　knowing　it；
when　Mrs。　Pasmer　left　him　with　Alice。

He　expected　her　to　join　him　and　her　mother　in　being　amused　at　this；　but　he
was　as　well　pleased　to　have　her　touched　at　his　having　brought　them；　and　to
turn　their　gaiety　off　in　praise　of　the　roses。　　She　got　a　vase　for　them；
and　set　it　on　the　table。　　He　noticed　for　the　first　time　the　pretty　house…
dress　she　had　on；　with　its　barred　corsage　and　under…skirt；　and　the　heavy
silken　rope　knotted　round　it　at　the　waist；　and　dropping　in　heavy　tufts　or
balls　in　front。

The　breakfast　was　Continental　in　its　simplicity；　and　Mrs。　Pasmer　said　that
they　had　always　kept　up　their　Paris　habit　of　a　light　breakfast；　even　in
London；　where　it　was　not　so　easy　to　follow　foreign　customs　as　it　was　in
America。　　She　was　afraid　he　might　find　it　too　light。　　Then　he　told　all
about　his　morning's　adventure；　ending　with　his　breakfast　at　the　Providence
Depot。　　Mrs。　Pasmer　entered　into　the　fun　of　it；　but　she　said　it　was　for
only　once　in　a　way；　and　he　must　not　expect　to　be　let　in　if　he　came　at　that
hour　another　morning。　　He　said　no；　he　understood　what　an　extraordinary
piece　of　luck　it　was　for　him　to　be　there；　and　he　was　there　to　be　bidden　to
do　whatever　they　wished。　　He　said　so　much　in　recognition　of　their
goodness；　that　he　became　abashed　by　it。　　Mrs。　Pasmer　sat　at　the　head　of
the　table；　and　Alice　across　it　from　him；　so　far　off　that　she　seemed　parted
from　him　by　an　insuperable　moral　distance。　　A　warm　flush　seemed　to　rise
from　his　heart　into　his　throat　and　stifle　him。　　He　wished　to　shed　tears。
His　eyes　were　wet　with　grateful　happiness　in　answering　Mrs。　Pasmer　that　he
would　not　have　any　more　coffee。　　〃Then；〃　she　said；　〃we　will　go　into　the
drawing…room；〃　but　she　allowed　him　and　Alice　to　go　alone。

He　was　still　in　that　illusion　of　awe　and　of　distance；　and　he　submitted　to
the　interposition　of　another　table　between　their　chairs。

〃I　wish　to　talk　with　you；〃　she　said；　so　seriously　that　he　was　frightened；
and　said　to　himself：　〃Now　she　is　going　to　break　it　off。　　She　has　thought
it　over；　and　she　finds　she　can't　endure　me。〃

〃Well？〃　he　said　huskily。

You　oughtn't　to　have　come　here；　you　know；　this　morning。〃

〃I　know　it；〃　he　vaguely　conceded。　　〃But　I　didn't　expect　to　get　in。〃

〃Well；　now　you're　here；　we　may　as　well　talk。　You　must　tell　your　family　at
once。〃

〃Yes；　I'm　going　to　write　to　them　as　soon　as　I　get　back　to　my　room。　　I
couldn't　last　night。〃

〃But　you　mustn't　write；　you　must　goand　prepare　their　minds。〃

〃Go？〃　he　echoed。　　〃Oh；　that　isn't　necessary！　　My　father　knew　about　it　from
the　beginning；　and　I　guess　they've　all　talked　it　over。　　Their　minds　are
prepared。〃　　The　sense　of　his　immeasurable　superiority　to　any　one's
opposition　began　to　dissipate　Dan's　unnatural　awe；　at　the　pleading　face
which　Alice　put　on；　resting　one　cheek　against　the　back　of　one　of　her
clasped　hands；　and　leaning　on　the　table　with　her　elbows；　he　began　to　be
teased　by　that　silken　rope　round　her　waist。

〃But　you　don't　understand；　dear；〃　she　said；　and　she　said　〃dear〃　as　if　they
were　old　married　people。　　〃You　must　go　to　see　them；　and　tell　them；　and
then　some　of　them　must　come　to　see　meyour　father　and　sisters。〃

〃Why；　of　course。〃　　His　eye　now　became　fastened　to　one　of　the　fluffy　silken
balls。

〃And　then　mamma　and　I　must　go　to　see　your　mother；　mustn't　we？〃

〃It'll　be　very　nice　of　youyes。　　You　know　she　can't　come　to　you。〃

〃Yes；　that's　what　I　thought；　andWhat　are　you　looking　at？〃　she　drew
herself　back　from　the　table　and　followed　the　direction　of　his　eye　with　a
woman's　instinctive　apprehension　of　disarray。

He　was　ashamed　to　tell。　　〃Oh；　nothing。　　I　was　just　thinking。〃

〃What？〃

〃Well；　I　don't　know。　　That　it　seems　so　strange　any　one　else　should　have
any　to　do　with　itmy　family　and　yours。　　But　I　suppose　they　must。　　Yes；
it's　all　right。〃

〃Why；　of　course。　　If　your　family　didn't　like　it〃

〃It　wouldn't　make　any　difference　to　me；〃　said　Dan　resolutely。

〃It　would　to　me；〃　she　retorted；　with　tender　reproach。　　〃Do　you　suppose　it
would　be　pleasant　to　go　into　a　family　that　didn't　like　yon？　　Suppose　papa
and　mamma　didn't　like　you？〃

〃But　I　thought　they　did；〃　said　Mavering；　with　his　mind　still　partly　on　the
rope　and　the　fluffy　ball；　but　keeping　his　eyes　away。

〃Yes；　they　do；〃　said　Alice。　　〃But　your　family　don't　know　me　at　all；　and
your　father's　only　seen　me　once。　　Can't　you　understand？　　I'm　afraid　we
don't　look　at　it　seriously　enoughearnestlyand　oh；　I　do　wish　to　have
everything　done　as　it　should　be！　　Sometimes；　when　I　think　of　it；　it　makes
me　tremble。　　I've　been　thinking　about　it　all　the　morning；　andand
praying。〃

Dan　wanted　to　fall　on　his　knees　to　her。　　The　idea　of　Alice　in　prayer　was
fascinating

〃I　wish　our　life　to　begin　with　others；　and　not　with　ourselves。　　If　we're
intrusted　with　so　much　happiness；　doesn't　it　mean　that　we're　to　do　good
with　itto　give　it　to　others　as　if　it　were　money？〃

The　nobleness　of　this　thought　stirred　Dan　greatly；　his　eyes　wandered　back
to　the　silken　rope；　but　now　it　seemed　to　him　an　emblem　of　voluntary
suffering　and　self…sacrifice；　like　a　devotee's　hem