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第23章

on the firing line-第23章

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〃You believe in luck; then?〃

〃Yes; or Fate。 What else makes a man move out of the way; just in time for the bullet to graze his cheek? He doesn't see the bullet coming; neither does the man who stops it。 Both of them are busy about something else。 For the man who escapes it; it is Providence; for the man who gets killed; it is Fate。〃

She tried to rouse him from his sudden gravity。

〃And for both; it is mere chance。〃

〃If you call it that。 Miss Dent〃 He hesitated。

〃Yes;〃 she assented gravely。

〃It was only a chance; but a strange one;〃 he went on; with his eyes fixed on the topmost ridge of his brown puttie。 〃We were climbing the face of a kopje; one day。 It was very steep; and we crawled up a narrow trail in single file。 Two days before; our guns had been shelling the whole kopje; and they must have cracked it up badly。 All at once; the man above me loosened a great lump of rock。 I was exactly underneath it。 It gave a little bound outward; went completely over me and struck full on the head of the next man in line。〃

The girl sat; bending forward in her chair; her strong; quiet hands clasped loosely in her lap。

〃And he?〃 she asked quite low。

〃He dropped to the foot of the kopje; dead。 In his fall; he dragged down the next man after him; and his leg was crushed。〃

〃And you were saved!〃 she said a bit breathlessly。

〃Doesn't it make you feel a vague responsibility; as if you must live up to something that you couldn't quite understand?〃

Without looking up; he bowed in assent。

〃Yes;〃 he said then。 〃Don't think me foolishly superstitious; Miss Dent; or too egotistic。 I try not to pay much attention to it。 Once in a while; though; not too often; it all comes back over me; and I feel then as if my life might have been kept for something that is still ahead of me。〃

〃And doesn't it leave you feeling anxious about making all your decisions?〃 she asked slowly; as she leaned back again in her chair。

〃At first。 Then I remember how that; and some other things have been settled for me。〃

〃What then?〃

〃Then I shut my teeth and face forward。 All one can do; is to forget the future and take the present as it comes; making the best of each minute and leaving the hour to look out for itself;〃 he answered simply。 〃Sometimes one makes better progress by drifting than he does by punting against the current。〃

She bit her lip。

〃Sometimes I think; though〃 Suddenly she roused herself and gave a nervous little laugh。 〃Captain Frazer is coming up the steps;〃 she added。

〃You think?〃 Weldon reminded her; as she rose。

But she shook her head and laughed again; this time more in her natural manner。

〃I think that I wish you would bring Mr。 Carew to call on me; next time you come;〃 she said evasively。

〃Thank you。 He will be glad to come。 The only question is when the next time will arrive。〃

〃You said Captain Frazer was a prophet;〃 she said; as she moved towards the door。 〃Ask him。〃

Tall; alert; eager; the Captain entered the room in time to catch her words。

〃A prophet of what and to whom; Miss Dent?〃 he asked; as he bowed over her outstretched hand。

〃To Mr。 Weldon; in regard to the future fighting;〃 she answered gayly。

〃You here; Weldon?〃

〃Yes; to say good by。〃

Captain Frazer nodded。

〃I saw Mitchell; this morning。 He spoke well of you; of Carew; too; for the matter of that。 He told me your troop would be off in the morning; and asked me to diagnose ;your best points。〃

〃Could you find any?〃 Weldon asked imperturbably。 〃A few。 I told him you could sit tight and shoot straight;〃 the Captain answered; laughing。 Then he added gravely; 〃And I also told him you could ride the fiend incarnate; and that; as far as I knew; you didn't lose your head when you were under fire。〃

For the instant; Weldon forgot his hostess; as he looked up to meet the Captain's blue eyes squarely。

〃Thank you。 But it is more than I deserve。〃

〃Then you must try to live up to it;〃 Ethel advised him languidly。 〃It merely increases your responsibilities; for now you have two reputations to support; your own for pluck and the Captain's for being a judge of his fellowmen。 It is an awful weight that you are carrying on your shoulders; Mr。 Weldon。〃

〃If it grows too heavy; I will slide some of it off on your own;〃 he returned; as he picked up his hat and rose to his feet。 〃Your responsibility is back of mine; Miss Dent。 It was you who advised me to stay in South Africa。〃

〃Not at all。 I presented the case and kept my advice to myself;〃 she rebelled promptly。

〃Certain presentments are stronger than much advising。〃

〃Perhaps。 But in the end; you remember; I commended your soul to Captain Frazer's keeping。〃

He bowed with the odd; old…fashioned deference which it pleased him to assume at times。 〃Captain Frazer may have saved it; but it may have been you who made it worth his efforts at salvation。〃

She laughed again。 Nevertheless; her eyes showed her pleasure。

〃Then we; Captain Frazer and I; must divide the responsibility for your future;〃 she replied。 〃In any case; may it be all good!〃

The drapery fell backward over his departing figure; and; for an instant; Ethel stood staring at the swaying folds。 Then; turning; she walked back to the fire。

〃All good;〃 she repeated。 〃I know you echo the wish; Captain Frazer。 Butisn't it hard to say good by?〃

〃In these days most of all;〃 he assented slowly。 〃And one never can tell when his own turn may come。〃

〃Nor what its end may be;〃 she added。 Then impetuously she rose again and moved up and down the room。 〃Look at that sunshine outside; Captain Frazer;〃 she said restlessly。 〃It ought to forbid any such gloomy moods。 I believe all this war and so many partings are spoiling my nerve。 I really feel quite blue; to…day; and Mr。 Weldon made it worse。〃

〃By saying good by?〃

Glancing up; she was astonished at the wishful; hungry look in the blue eyes before her。 〃Yes; a little;〃 she said lightly; 〃for I hate the very word。 But; if it must be spoken; it should always be short and staccato。 Instead; he sat here; and we talked about Fate and wounds and all sorts of direful things。〃 She shook herself and shivered slightly。 Then she sat down in the chair which Weldon had just left vacant。 〃It is bad manners to have nerves; Captain Frazer。 Forgive me first; and then tell me something altogether flippant; to make me forget things。〃

But her mood had caught the Captain in its grasp。

〃Are you sure you want to forget?〃 he asked her gravely。

〃Yes;〃 she made vehement answer。 〃Always!〃

But not even her decided answer brought back the eager light into his dark blue eyes。

Nevertheless; an hour later found him still sitting there。 Ethel's depression had vanished; to be followed by a mood of wayward merriment for which the honest; straightforward soldier was totally at a loss to account。 Sincere himself; he looked for sincerity in others。 If Ethel's gravity had been unfeigned; how could it so soon give place to her present buoyancy? Not the strictest code of hospitality could demand that a hostess should straightway toss aside the thought of the parting guest who had gone away to battle and; perhaps; to sudden death。 And; if the girl had been insincere in her parting from Weldon; why should she be sincere in her present absorption in his own interests? And; if her regrets for Weldon were as great as they had seemed to be; then what was the use of his remaining by her side any longer? The horns of the dilemma extended themselves to infinity and branched again and again as they extended。 Meanwhile; his eyes were full of trouble; and his answers to her questions were vague and faltering。 Until her sudden trip to Johannesburg; Captain Frazer had taken the girl as a matter of course。 Since then; he had begun to doubt; and the doubts were thickening。

But; after all; there was no real reason for doubt。 During her one short season in London; the Captain had met Ethel constantly; he had been quite obviously the favorite of the old aunt who had presided over the girl's introduction to society; and his later meetings with Ethel at sundry week…end gatherings had convinced him that he had no serious rival。 Then had come the war; and Ethel's absence from town had m

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