armadale-第180章

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doctor；　throwing　himself　back　in　his　chair；　and　looking　at　me
with　the　utmost　innocence。

〃　'I　only　know　You；'　I　said。

〃The　doctor　laughed　softly。　'So　like　a　woman！'　he　remarked；　with
the　most　exasperating　good　humor。　'The　moment　she　sees　her
object；　she　dashes　at　it　headlong　the　nearest　way。　Oh；　the　sex！
the　sex！'

〃　'Never　mind　the　sex！'　I　broke　out；　impatiently。　'I　want　a
serious　answerYes　or　No？'

〃The　doctor　rose；　and　waved　his　hand　with　great　gravity　and
dignity　all　round　the　room。　'You　see　this　vast　establishment；'　he
began；　'you　can　possibly　estimate　to　some　extent　the　immense
stake　I　have　in　its　prosperity　and　success。　Your　excellent
natural　sense　will　tell　you　that　the　Principal　of　this　Sanitarium
must
　be　a　man　of　the　most　unblemished　character'

〃　'Why　waste　so　many　words；'　I　said；　'when　one　word　will　do？　You
mean　No！'

〃The　Principal　of　the　Sanitarium　suddenly　relapsed　into　the
character　of　my　confidential　friend。

〃　'My　dear　lady；'　he　said；　'it　isn't　Yes；　and　it　isn't　No；　at　a
moment's　notice。　Give　me　till　to…morrow　afternoon。　By　that　time　I
engage　to　be　ready　to　do　one　of　two　thingseither　to　withdraw
myself　from　this　business　at　once；　or　to　go　into　it　with　you
heart　and　soul。　Do　you　agree　to　that？　Very　good；　we　may　drop　the
subject；　then；　till　to…morrow。　Where　can　I　call　on　you　when　I
have　decided　what　to　do？'

〃There　was　no　objection　to　my　trusting　him　with　my　address　at　the
hotel。　I　had　taken　care　to　present　myself　there　as　'Mrs。
Armadale'；　and　I　had　given　Midwinter　an　address　at　the
neighboring　post…office　to　write　to　when　he　answered　my　letters。
We　settled　the　hour　at　which　the　doctor　was　to　call　on　me；　and；
that　matter　arranged；　I　rose　to　go；　resisting　all　offers　of
refreshment；　and　all　proposals　to　show　me　over　the　house。　His
smooth　persistence　in　keeping　up　appearances　after　we　had
thoroughly　understood　each　other　disgusted　me。　I　got　away　from
him　as　soon　as　I　could；　and　came　back　to　my　diary　and　my　own
room。

〃We　shall　see　how　it　ends　to…morrow。　My　own　idea　is　that　my
confidential　friend　will　say　Yes。


〃November　24th。The　doctor　has　said　Yes；　as　I　supposed；　but　on
terms　which　I　never　anticipated。　The　condition　on　which　I　have
secured　his　services　amounts　to　nothing　less　than　the　payment　to
him；　on　my　stepping　into　the　place　of　Armadale's　widow；　of　half
my　first　year's　incomein　other　words；　six　hundred　pounds！

〃I　protested　against　this　extortionate　demand　in　every　way　I
could　think　of。　All　to　no　purpose。　The　doctor　met　me　with　the
most　engaging　frankness。　Nothing；　he　said；　but　the　accidental
embarrassment　of　his　position　at　the　present　time　would　have
induced　him　to　mix　himself　up　in　the　matter　at　all。　He　would
honestly　confess　that　he　had　exhausted　his　own　resources；　and　the
resources　of　other　persons　whom　he　described　as　his　'backers；'　in
the　purchase　and　completion　of　the　Sanitarium。　Under　those
circumstances；　six　hundred　pounds　in　prospect　was　an　object　to
him。　For　that　sum　he　would　run　the　serious　risk　of　advising　and
assisting　me。　Not　a　farthing　less　would　tempt　him；　and　there　he
left　it；　with　his　best　and　friendliest　wishes；　in　my　hands！

〃It　ended　in　the　only　way　in　which　it　could　end。　I　had　no　choice
but　to　accept　the　terms；　and　to　let　the　doctor　settle　things　on
the　spot　as　he　pleased。　The　arrangement　once　made　between　us；　I
must　do　him　the　justice　to　say　that　he　showed　no　disposition　to
let　the　grass　grow　under　his　feet。　He　called　briskly　for　pen；　ink
and　paper；　and　suggested　opening　the　campaign　at　Thorpe　Ambrose
by　to…night's　post。

〃We　agreed　on　a　form　of　letter　which　I　wrote；　and　which　he　copied
on　the　spot。　I　entered　into　no　particulars　at　starting。　I　simply
asserted　that　I　was　the　widow　of　the　deceased　Mr。　Armadale；　that
I　had　been　privately　married　to　him；　that　I　had　returned　to
England　on　his　sailing　in　the　yacht　from　Naples；　and　that　I
begged　to　inclose　a　copy　of　my　marriage　certificate；　as　a　matter
of　form　with　which　I　presumed　it　was　customary　to　comply。　The
letter　was　addressed　to　'The　Representatives　of　the　late　Allan
Armadale；　Esq。；　Thorpe　Ambrose；　Norfolk。'　And　the　doctor　himself
carried　it　away；　and　put　it　in　the　post。

〃I　am　not　so　excited　and　so　impatient　for　results　as　I　expected
to　be；　now　that　the　first　step　is　taken。　The　thought　of　Midwinter
haunts　me　like　a　ghost。　I　have　been　writing　to　him　againas
before；　to　keep　up　appearances。　It　will　be　my　last　letter；　I
think。　My　courage　feels　shaken；　my　spirits　get　depressed；　when　my
thoughts　go　back　to　Turin。　I　am　no　more　capable　of　facing　the
consideration　of　Midwinter　at　this　moment　than　I　was　in　the
by…gone　time；　The　day　of　reckoning　with　him；　once　distant　and
doubtful；　is　a　day　that　may　come　to　me　now；　I　know　not　how　soon。
And　here　I　am；　trusting　myself　blindly　to　the　chapter　of
Accidents　still！


〃November　25th。At　two　o'clock　to…day　the　doctor　called　again　by
appointment。　He　has　been　to　his　lawyers　（of　course　without　taking
them　into　our　confidence）　to　put　the　case　simply　of　proving　my
marriage。　The　result　confirms　what　he　has　already　told　me。　The
pivot　on　which　the　whole　matter　will　turn；　if　my　claim　is
disputed；　will　be　the　question　of　identity；　and　it　may　be
necessary　for　the　witness　to　make　his　Declaration　in　the
magistrate's　presence　before　the　week　is　out。

〃In　this　position　of　affairs；　the　doctor　thinks　it　important　that
we　should　be　within　easy　reach　of　each　other；　and　proposes　to
find　a　quiet　lodging　for　me　in　his　neighborhood。　I　am　quite
willing　to　go　anywhere；　for；　among　the　other　strange　fancies　that
have　got　possession　of　me；　I　have　an　idea　that　I　shall　feel　more
completely　lost　to　Midwinter　if　I　move　out　of　the　neighborhood　in
which　his　letters　are　addressed　to　me。　I　was　awake　and　thinking
of　him　again　last　night　This　morning　I　have　finally　decided　to
write　to　him　no　more。

〃After　staying　half　an　hour；　the　doctor　left　me；　having　first
inquired　whether　I　would　like　to　accompany　him　to　Hampstead　to
look　for　lodgings。　I　informed　him　that　I　had　some　business　of　my
own　which　would　keep　me　in　London。　He　inquired　what　the　business
was。　'You　will　see；'　I　said；　'to…morrow　or　next　day。'

〃I　had　a　moment's　nervous　trembling　when　I　was　by　myself　again。
My　business　in　London；　besides　being　a　serious　business　in　a
woman's　eyes；　took　my　mind　back　to　Midwinter　in　spite　of　me。　The
prospect　of　removing　to　my　new　lodging　had　reminded　me　of　the
necessity　of　dressing　in　my　new　character。　The　time　had　come　now
for　getting　_my　widow's　weeds。_

〃My　first　proceeding；　after　putting　my　bonnet　on；　was　to　provide
myself　with　money。　I　got　what　I　wanted　to　fit　me　out　for　the
character　of　Armadale's　widow　by　nothing　less　than　the　sale　of
Armadale's　own　present　to　me　on　my　marriagethe　ruby　ring！　It
proved　to　be　a　more　valuable　jewel　than　I　had　supposed。　I　am
likely　to　be　spared　all　money　anxieties　for　some　time　to　come。

〃On　leaving　the　jeweler's；　I　went　to　the　great　mourning　shop　in
Regent　Street。　In　four…and…twenty　hours　（if　I　can　give　them　no
more）　they　have　engaged　to　dress　me　in　my　widow's　costume　from
head　to　foot。　I　had　another　feverish　moment　when　I　left　the　shop；
and；　by　way　of　further　excitement　on　this　agitating　day；　I　found
a　surprise　in　store　for　me　on　my　return　to　the　hotel。　An　elderly
gentleman　was　announced　to　be　waiting　to　see　me。　I　opened　my
sitting…room　door；　and　there　was　old　Bashwood！

〃He　had　got　my　letter　that　morning；　and　had　started　for　London　by
the　next　train　to　answer　it　in　person。　I　had　expected　a　great
deal　from　him；　but　I　had　certainly　not　expected　_that。_　It
flattered　me。　For　the　moment；　I　declare　it　flattered　me！

〃I　pass　over　the　wretched　old　creature's　raptures　and　reproaches；
and　groans　and　tears；　and　weary　long　prosings　about　the　lonely
months　he　had　passed　at　Thorpe　Ambrose；　brooding　over　my
desertion　of　him。　He　was　quite　eloquent　at　times；　but　I　don't
want　his　eloquence　here。　It　is　needless　to　say　that　I　put　myself
right　with　him；　and　consulted　his　feelings　before　I　asked　him　for
his　news。　What　a　blessing　a　woman's　vanity　is　sometimes！　I　almost
forgot　my　risks　and　responsibilities　in　my　anxieties　to　be
charming。　For　a　minute　or　two　I　felt　a　warm　little