the aspern papers-第11章

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She　looked　at　me　as　if　I　were　talking　some　strange　tongue；　and　her

answer　was　so　little　of　an　answer　that　I　was　considerably　irritated。

〃We　go　to　bed　very　earlyearlier　than　you　would　believe。〃

I　was　on　the　point　of　saying　that　this　only　deepened　the　mystery　when　she

gave　me　some　relief　by　adding；　〃Before　you　came　we　were　not　so　private。

But　I　never　have　been　out　at　night。〃



〃Never　in　these　fragrant　alleys；　blooming　here　under　your　nose？〃



〃Ah；〃　said　Miss　Tita；　〃they　were　never　nice　till　now！〃　　There　was

an　unmistakable　reference　in　this　and　a　flattering　comparison；

so　that　it　seemed　to　me　I　had　gained　a　small　advantage。

As　it　would　help　me　to　follow　it　up　to　establish　a　sort　of

grievance　I　asked　her　why；　since　she　thought　my　garden　nice；

she　had　never　thanked　me　in　any　way　for　the　flowers　I　had　been

sending　up　in　such　quantities　for　the　previous　three　weeks。

I　had　not　been　discouragedthere　had　been；　as　she　would

have　observed；　a　daily　armful；　but　I　had　been　brought　up

in　the　common　forms　and　a　word　of　recognition　now　and　then

would　have　touched　me　in　the　right　place。



〃Why　I　didn't　know　they　were　for　me！〃



〃They　were　for　both　of　you。　　Why　should　I　make　a　difference？〃



Miss　Tita　reflected　as　if　she　might　by　thinking　of　a　reason　for　that；

but　she　failed　to　produce　one。　　Instead　of　this　she　asked　abruptly；

〃Why　in　the　world　do　you　want　to　know　us？〃



〃I　ought　after　all　to　make　a　difference；〃　I　replied。

〃That　question　is　your　aunt's；　it　isn't　yours。　　You　wouldn't

ask　it　if　you　hadn't　been　put　up　to　it。〃



〃She　didn't　tell　me　to　ask　you；〃　Miss　Tita　replied　without　confusion；

she　was　the　oddest　mixture　of　the　shrinking　and　the　direct。



〃Well；　she　has　often　wondered　about　it　herself　and　expressed

her　wonder　to　you。　　She　has　insisted　on　it；　so　that　she　has

put　the　idea　into　your　head　that　I　am　insufferably　pushing。

Upon　my　word　I　think　I　have　been　very　discreet。

And　how　completely　your　aunt　must　have　lost　every　tradition

of　sociability；　to　see　anything　out　of　the　way　in　the　idea

that　respectable　intelligent　people；　living　as　we　do　under

the　same　roof；　should　occasionally　exchange　a　remark！

What　could　be　more　natural？　　We　are　of　the　same　country；

and　we　have　at　least　some　of　the　same　tastes；　since；　like　you；

I　am　intensely　fond　of　Venice。〃



My　interlocutress　appeared　incapable　of　grasping　more　than　one　clause

in　any　proposition；　and　she　declared　quickly；　eagerly；　as　if　she　were

answering　my　whole　speech：　　〃I　am　not　in　the　least　fond　of　Venice。

I　should　like　to　go　far　away！〃



〃Has　she　always　kept　you　back　so？〃　　I　went　on；　to　show　her　that　I

could　be　as　irrelevant　as　herself。



〃She　told　me　to　come　out　tonight；　she　has　told　me　very　often；〃

said　Miss　Tita。　　〃It　is　I　who　wouldn't　come。　　I　don't　like

to　leave　her。〃



〃Is　she　too　weak；　is　she　failing？〃　　I　demanded；　with　more　emotion；

I　think；　than　I　intended　to　show。　　I　judged　this　by　the　way

her　eyes　rested　upon　me　in　the　darkness。　　It　embarrassed　me

a　little；　and　to　turn　the　matter　off　I　continued　genially：

〃Do　let　us　sit　down　together　comfortably　somewhere；　and　you

will　tell　me　all　about　her。〃



Miss　Tita　made　no　resistance　to　this。　　We　found　a　bench

less　secluded；　less　confidential；　as　it　were；　than　the　one

in　the　arbor；　and　we　were　still　sitting　there　when　I　heard

midnight　ring　out　from　those　clear　bells　of　Venice　which

vibrate　with　a　solemnity　of　their　own　over　the　lagoon　and　hold

the　air　so　much　more　than　the　chimes　of　other　places。

We　were　together　more　than　an　hour；　and　our　interview　gave；

as　it　struck　me；　a　great　lift　to　my　undertaking。

Miss　Tita　accepted　the　situation　without　a　protest；

she　had　avoided　me　for　three　months；　yet　now　she　treated　me

almost　as　if　these　three　months　had　made　me　an　old　friend。

If　I　had　chosen　I　might　have　inferred　from　this　that　though

she　had　avoided　me　she　had　given　a　good　deal　of　consideration

to　doing　so。　　She　paid　no　attention　to　the　flight　of　time

never　worried　at　my　keeping　her　so　long　away　from　her　aunt。

She　talked　freely；　answering　questions　and　asking　them　and　not

even　taking　advantage　of　certain　longish　pauses　with　which　they

inevitably　alternated　to　say　she　thought　she　had　better　go　in。

It　was　almost　as　if　she　were　waiting　for　somethingsomething　I

might　say　to　herand　intended　to　give　me　my　opportunity。

I　was　the　more　struck　by　this　as　she　told　me　that　her　aunt

had　been　less　well　for　a　good　many　days　and　in　a　way　that　was

rather　new。　　She　was　weaker；　at　moments　it　seemed　as　if　she

had　no　strength　at　all；　yet　more　than　ever　before　she　wished

to　be　left　alone。　　That　was　why　she　had　told　her　to　come　out

not　even　to　remain　in　her　own　room；　which　was　alongside；

she　said　her　niece　irritated　her；　made　her　nervous。

She　sat　still　for　hours　together；　as　if　she　were　asleep；

she　had　always　done　that；　musing　and　dozing；　but　at　such　times

formerly　she　gave　at　intervals　some　small　sign　of　life；

of　interest；　liking　her　companion　to　be　near　her　with　her　work。

Miss　Tita　confided　to　me　that　at　present　her　aunt　was　so

motionless　that　she　sometimes　feared　she　was　dead；　moreover　she

took　hardly　any　foodone　couldn't　see　what　she　lived　on。

The　great　thing　was　that　she　still　on　most　days　got　up；

the　serious　job　was　to　dress　her；　to　wheel　her　out　of　her　bedroom。

She　clung　to　as　many　of　her　old　habits　as　possible　and　she

had　always；　little　company　as　they　had　received　for　years；

made　a　point　of　sitting　in　the　parlor。



I　scarcely　knew　what　to　think　of　all　thisof　Miss　Tita's

sudden　conversion　to　sociability　and　of　the　strange

circumstance　that　the　more　the　old　lady　appeared　to　decline

toward　her　end　the　less　she　should　desire　to　be　looked　after。

The　story　did　not　hang　together；　and　I　even　asked　myself　whether

it　were　not　a　trap　laid　for　me；　the　result　of　a　design　to　make

me　show　my　hand。　　I　could　not　have　told　why　my　companions

（as　they　could　only　by　courtesy　be　called）　should　have　this　purpose

why　they　should　try　to　trip　up　so　lucrative　a　lodger。

At　any　rate　I　kept　on　my　guard；　so　that　Miss　Tita　should　not

have　occasion　again　to　ask　me　if　I　had　an　arriere…pensee。

Poor　woman；　before　we　parted　for　the　night　my　mind　was　at　rest

as　to　HER　capacity　for　entertaining　one。



She　told　me　more　about　their　affairs　than　I　had　hoped；

there　was　no　need　to　be　prying；　for　it　evidently　drew

her　out　simply　to　feel　that　I　listened；　that　I　cared。

She　ceased　wondering　why　I　cared；　and　at　last；　as　she　spoke　of

the　brilliant　life　they　had　led　years　before；　she　almost　chattered。

It　was　Miss　Tita　who　judged　it　brilliant；　she　said　that　when　they

first　came　to　live　in　Venice；　years　and　years　before　（I　saw

that　her　mind　was　essentially　vague　about　dates　and　the　order

in　which　events　had　occurred）；　there　was　scarcely　a　week

that　they　had　not　some　visitor　or　did　not　make　some　delightful

passeggio　in　the　city。　　They　had　seen　all　the　curiosities；

they　had　even　been　to　the　Lido　in　a　boat　（she　spoke　as　if　I　might

think　there　was　a　way　on　foot）；　they　had　had　a　collation　there；

brought　in　three　baskets　and　spread　out　on　the　grass。

I　asked　her　what　people　they　had　known　and　she　said；　Oh！　very

nice　onesthe　Cavaliere　Bombicci　and　the　Contessa　Altemura；

with　whom　they　had　had　a　great　friendship。　　Also　English　people

the　Churtons　and　the　Goldies　and　Mrs。　Stock…Stock；　whom

they　had　loved　dearly；　she　was　dead　and　gone；　poor　dear。

That　was　the　case　with　most　of　their　pleasant　circle

（this　expression　was　Miss　Tita's　own）；　though　a　few　were　left；

which　was　a　wonder　considering　how　they　had　neglected　them。

She　mentioned　the　names　of　two　or　three　Venetian　old　women；　of　a

certain　doctor；　very　clever；　who　was　so　kindhe　came　as　a　friend；

he　had　really　given　up　practice；　of　the　avvocato　Pochintesta；

who　wrote　beautiful　poems　and　had　addressed　one　to　her　aunt。

These　people　came　to　see　them　without　fail　every　year；

usually　at　the　capo　d'anno；　and　of　old　her　aunt　used

to　make　them　some　little　p