the garden of allah-第2章

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a　dose　of　a　drug。　It　did　not　act　completely；　but　only　numbed　her
senses。　Through　the　long　hours　she　lay　in　the　dark　cabin；　looking　at
the　faint　radiance　that　penetrated　through　the　glass　shutters　of　the
skylight。　The　recruits；　humanised　and　drawn　together　by　misery；　were
becoming　acquainted。　The　incessant　murmur　of　their　voices　dropped　down
to　her；　with　the　sound　of　the　waves；　and　of　the　mysterious　cries　and
creaking　shudders　that　go　through　labouring　ships。　And　all　these
noises　seemed　to　her　hoarse　and　pathetic；　suggestive；　too；　of　danger。

When　they　reached　the　African　shore；　and　saw　the　lights　of　houses
twinkling　upon　the　hills；　the　pale　recruits　were　marshalled　on　the
white　road　by　Zouaves；　who　met　them　from　the　barracks　of　Robertville。
Already　they　looked　older　than　they　had　looked　when　they　embarked。
Domini　saw　them　march　away　up　the　hill。　They　still　clung　to　their　bags
and　bundles。　Some　of　them；　lifting　shaky　voices；　tried　to　sing　in
chorus。　One　of　the　Zouaves　angrily　shouted　to　them　to　be　quiet。　They
obeyed；　and　disappeared　heavily　into　the　shadows；　staring　about　them
anxiously　at　the　feathery　palms　that　clustered　in　this　new　and　dark
country；　and　at　the　shrouded　figures　of　Arabs　who　met　them　on　the　way。

The　red　brick　floor　was　heaving　gently；　Domini　thought。　She　found
herself　wondering　how　the　cane　chair　by　the　small　wardrobe　kept　its
footing；　and　why　the　cracked　china　basin　in　the　iron　washstand；
painted　bright　yellow；　did　not　stir　and　rattle。　Her　dressing…bag　was
open。　She　could　see　the　silver　backs　and　tops　of　the　brushes　and
bottles　in　it　gleaming。　They　made　her　think　suddenly　of　England。　She
had　no　idea　why。　But　it　was　too　warm　for　England。　There；　in　the　autumn
time；　an　open　window　would　let　in　a　cold　air；　probably　a　biting　blast。
The　wooden　shutter　would　be　shaking。　There　would　be；　perhaps；　a　sound
of　rain。　And　Domini　found　herself　vaguely　pitying　England　and　the
people　mewed　up　in　it　for　the　winter。　Yet　how　many　winters　she　had
spent　there；　dreaming　of　liberty　and　doing　dreary　thingsthings
without　savour；　without　meaning；　without　salvation　for　brain　or　soul。
Her　mind　was　still　dulled　to　a　certain　extent　by　the　narcotic　she　had
taken。　She　was　a　strong　and　active　woman；　with　long　limbs　and　well…
knit　muscles；　a　clever　fencer；　a　tireless　swimmer；　a　fine　horsewoman。
But　to…night　she　felt　almost　neurotic；　like　one　of　the　weak　or
dissipated　sisterhood　for　whom　〃rest　cures〃　are　invented；　and　by　whom
bland　doctors　live。　That　heaving　red　floor　continually　emphasised　for
her　her　present　feebleness。　She　hated　feebleness。　So　she　blew　out　the
candle　and；　with　misplaced　energy；　strove　resolutely　to　sleep。
Possibly　her　resolution　defeated　its　object。　She　continued　in　a
condition　of　dull　and　heavy　wakefulness　till　the　darkness　became
intolerable　to　her。　In　it　she　saw　perpetually　the　long　procession　of
the　pale　recruits　winding　up　the　hill　of　Addouna　with　their　bags　and
bundles；　like　spectres　on　a　way　of　dreams。　Finally　she　resolved　to
accept　a　sleepless　night。　She　lit　her　candle　again　and　saw　that　the
brick　floor　was　no　longer　heaving。　Two　of　the　books　that　she　called
her　〃bed…books〃　lay　within　easy　reach　of　her　hand。　One　was　Newman's
/Dream　of　Gerontius/；　the　other　a　volume　of　the　Badminton　Library。　She
chose　the　former　and　began　to　read。

Towards　two　o'clock　she　heard　a　long…continued　rustling。　At　first　she
supposed　that　her　tired　brain　was　still　playing　her　tricks。　But　the
rustling　continued　and　grew　louder。　It　sounded　like　a　noise　coming
from　something　very　wide；　and　spread　out　as　a　veil　over　an　immense
surface。　She　got　up；　walked　across　the　floor　to　the　open　window　and
unfastened　the　/persiennes/。　Heavy　rain　was　falling。　The　night　was
very　black；　and　smelt　rich　and　damp；　as　if　it　held　in　its　arms　strange
offeringsa　merchandise　altogether　foreign；　tropical　and　alluring。　As
she　stood　there；　face　to　face　with　a　wonder　that　she　could　not　see；
Domini　forgot　Newman。　She　felt　the　brave　companionship　of　mystery。　In
it　she　divined　the　beating　pulses；　the　hot；　surging　blood　of　freedom。

She　wanted　freedom；　a　wide　horizon；　the　great　winds；　the　great　sun；
the　terrible　spaces；　the　glowing；　shimmering　radiance；　the　hot；
entrancing　moons　and　bloomy；　purple　nights　of　Africa。　She　wanted　the
nomad's　fires　and　the　acid　voices　of　the　Kabyle　dogs。　She　wanted　the
roar　of　the　tom…toms；　the　dash　of　the　cymbals；　the　rattle　of　the
negroes'　castanets；　the　fluttering；　painted　figures　of　the　dancers。
She　wantedmore　than　she　could　express；　more　than　she　knew。　It　was
there；　want；　aching　in　her　heart；　as　she　drew　into　her　nostrils　this
strange　and　wealthy　atmosphere。

When　Domini　returned　to　her　bed　she　found　it　impossible　to　read　any
more　Newman。　The　rain　and　the　scents　coming　up　out　of　the　hidden　earth
of　Africa　had　carried　her　mind　away；　as　if　on　a　magic　carpet。　She　was
content　now　to　lie　awake　in　the　dark。

Domini　was　thirty…two；　unmarried；　and　in　a　singularly　independent
some　might　have　thought　a　singularly　lonelysituation。　Her　father；
Lord　Rens；　had　recently　died；　leaving　Domini；　who　was　his　only　child；
a　large　fortune。　His　life　had　been　a　curious　and　a　tragic　one。　Lady
Rens；　Domini's　mother；　had　been　a　great　beauty　of　the　gipsy　type；　the
daughter　of　a　Hungarian　mother　and　of　Sir　Henry　Arlworth；　one　of　the
most　prominent　and　ardent　English　Catholics　of　his　day。　A　son　of　his
became　a　priest；　and　a　famous　preacher　and　writer　on　religious
subjects。　Another　child；　a　daughter；　took　the　veil。　Lady　Rens；　who　was
not　clever；　although　she　was　at　one　time　almost　universally　considered
to　have　the　face　of　a　muse；　shared　in　the　family　ardour　for　the
Church；　but　was　far　too　fond　of　the　world　to　leave　it。　While　she　was
very　young　she　met　Lord　Rens；　a　Lifeguardsman　of　twenty…six；　who
called　himself　a　Protestant；　but　who　was　really　quite　happy　without
any　faith。　He　fell　madly　in　love　with　her　and；　in　order　to　marry　her；
became　a　Catholic；　and　even　a　very　devout　one；　aiding　his　wife's
Church　by　every　means　in　his　power；　giving　large　sums　to　Catholic
charities；　and　working；　with　almost　fiery　zeal；　for　the　spread　of
Catholicism　in　England。

Unfortunately；　his　new　faith　was　founded　only　on　love　for　a　human
being；　and　when　Lady　Rens；　who　was　intensely　passionate　and　impulsive；
suddenly　threw　all　her　principles　to　the　winds；　and　ran　away　with　a
Hungarian　musician；　who　had　made　a　furor　one　season　in　London　by　his
magnificent　violin…playing；　her　husband；　stricken　in　his　soul；　and
also　wounded　almost　to　the　death　in　his　pride；　abandoned　abruptly　the
religion　of　the　woman　who　had　converted　and　betrayed　him。

Domini　was　nineteen；　and　had　recently　been　presented　at　Court　when　the
scandal　of　her　mother's　escapade　shook　the　town；　and　changed　her
father　in　a　day　from　one　of　the　happiest　to　one　of　the　most　cynical；
embittered　and　despairing　of　men。　She；　who　had　been　brought　up　by　both
her　parents　as　a　Catholic；　who　had　from　her　earliest　years　been
earnestly　educated　in　the　beauties　of　religion；　was　now　exposed　to　the
almost　frantic　persuasions　of　a　father　who；　hating　all　that　he　had
formerly　loved；　abandoning　all　that；　influenced　by　his　faithless　wife；
he　had　formerly　clung　to；　wished　to　carry　his　daughter　with　him　into
his　new　and　most　miserable　way　of　life。　But　Domini；　who；　with　much　of
her　mother's　dark　beauty；　had　inherited　much　of　her　quick　vehemence
and　passion；　was　also　gifted　with　brains；　and　with　a　certain　largeness
of　temperament　and　clearness　of　insight　which　Lady　Rens　lacked。　Even
when　she　was　still　quivering　under　the　shock　and　shame　of　her　mother's
guilt　and　her　own　solitude；　Domini　was　unable　to　share　her　father's
intensely　egoistic　view　of　the　religion　of　the　culprit。　She　could　not
be　persuaded　that　the　faith　in　which　she　had　been　brought　up　was
proved　to　be　a　sham　because　one　of　its　professors；　whom　she　had　above
all　others　loved　and　trusted；　had　broken　away　from　its　teachings　and
defied　her　own　belief。　She　would　not　secede　with　her　father；　but
remained　in　the　Church　of　the　mother　she　was　never　to　see　again；　and
this　in　spite　of　extraordinary　and　dogged　efforts　on　the　part　of　Lord
Rens　to　pervert　her　to　his　own　Atheism。　His　mind　had　been　so　w