the uncommercial traveller-第85章

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passed　their　lives　in　considering　themselves　mulcted　of　certain

ounces　of　tea　by　a　deaf　old　steward　who　lived　among　them　in　the

quadrangle。　　There　was　no　reason　to　suppose　that　any　such　ounces　of

tea　had　ever　been　in　existence；　or　that　the　old　steward　so　much　as

knew　what　was　the　matter；　…　he　passed　HIS　life　in　considering

himself　periodically　defrauded　of　a　birch…broom　by　the　beadle。



But　it　is　neither　to　old　Alms…Houses　in　the　country；　nor　to　new

Alms…Houses　by　the　railroad；　that　these　present　Uncommercial　notes

relate。　　They　refer　back　to　journeys　made　among　those　common…place；

smoky…fronted　London　Alms…Houses；　with　a　little　paved　court…yard　in

front　enclosed　by　iron　railings；　which　have　got　snowed　up；　as　it

were；　by　bricks　and　mortar；　which　were　once　in　a　suburb；　but　are

now　in　the　densely　populated　town；　gaps　in　the　busy　life　around

them；　parentheses　in　the　close　and　blotted　texts　of　the　streets。



Sometimes；　these　Alms…Houses　belong　to　a　Company　or　Society。

Sometimes；　they　were　established　by　individuals；　and　are　maintained

out　of　private　funds　bequeathed　in　perpetuity　long　ago。　　My

favourite　among　them　is　Titbull's；　which　establishment　is　a　picture

of　many。　　Of　Titbull　I　know　no　more　than　that　he　deceased　in　1723；

that　his　Christian　name　was　Sampson；　and　his　social　designation

Esquire；　and　that　he　founded　these　Alms…Houses　as　Dwellings　for

Nine　Poor　Women　and　Six　Poor　Men　by　his　Will　and　Testament。　　I

should　not　know　even　this　much；　but　for　its　being　inscribed　on　a

grim　stone　very　difficult　to　read；　let　into　the　front　of　the　centre

house　of　Titbull's　Alms…Houses；　and　which　stone　is　ornamented　a…top

with　a　piece　of　sculptured　drapery　resembling　the　effigy　of

Titbull's　bath…towel。



Titbull's　Alms…Houses　are　in　the　east　of　London；　in　a　great

highway；　in　a　poor；　busy；　and　thronged　neighbourhood。　　Old　iron　and

fried　fish；　cough　drops　and　artificial　flowers；　boiled　pigs'…feet

and　household　furniture　that　looks　as　if　it　were　polished　up　with

lip…salve；　umbrellas　full　of　vocal　literature　and　saucers　full　of

shell…fish　in　a　green　juice　which　I　hope　is　natural　to　them　when

their　health　is　good；　garnish　the　paved　sideways　as　you　go　to

Titbull's。　　I　take　the　ground　to　have　risen　in　those　parts　since

Titbull's　time；　and　you　drop　into　his　domain　by　three　stone　steps。

So　did　I　first　drop　into　it；　very　nearly　striking　my　brows　against

Titbull's　pump；　which　stands　with　its　back　to　the　thoroughfare　just

inside　the　gate；　and　has　a　conceited　air　of　reviewing　Titbull's

pensioners。



'And　a　worse　one；'　said　a　virulent　old　man　with　a　pitcher；　'there

isn't　nowhere。　　A　harder　one　to　work；　nor　a　grudginer　one　to　yield；

there　isn't　nowhere！'　　This　old　man　wore　a　long　coat；　such　as　we

see　Hogarth's　Chairmen　represented　with；　and　it　was　of　that

peculiar　green…pea　hue　without　the　green；　which　seems　to　come　of

poverty。　　It　had　also　that　peculiar　smell　of　cupboard　which　seems

to　come　of　poverty。



'The　pump　is　rusty；　perhaps；'　said　I。



'Not　IT；'　said　the　old　man；　regarding　it　with　undiluted　virulence

in　his　watery　eye。　　'It　never　were　fit　to　be　termed　a　pump。　　That's

what's　the　matter　with　IT。'



'Whose　fault　is　that？'　said　I。



The　old　man；　who　had　a　working　mouth　which　seemed　to　be　trying　to

masticate　his　anger　and　to　find　that　it　was　too　hard　and　there　was

too　much　of　it；　replied；　'Them　gentlemen。'



'What　gentlemen？'



'Maybe　you're　one　of　'em？'　said　the　old　man；　suspiciously。



'The　trustees？'



'I　wouldn't　trust　'em　myself；'　said　the　virulent　old　man。



'If　you　mean　the　gentlemen　who　administer　this　place；　no；　I　am　not

one　of　them；　nor　have　I　ever　so　much　as　heard　of　them。'



'I　wish　I　never　heard　of　them；'　gasped　the　old　man：　　'at　my　time　of

life　…　with　the　rheumatics　…　drawing　water…from　that　thing！'　　Not

to　be　deluded　into　calling　it　a　Pump；　the　old　man　gave　it　another

virulent　look；　took　up　his　pitcher；　and　carried　it　into　a　corner

dwelling…house；　shutting　the　door　after　him。



Looking　around　and　seeing　that　each　little　house　was　a　house　of　two

little　rooms；　and　seeing　that　the　little　oblong　court…yard　in　front

was　like　a　graveyard　for　the　inhabitants；　saving　that　no　word　was

engraven　on　its　flat　dry　stones；　and　seeing　that　the　currents　of

life　and　noise　ran　to　and　fro　outside；　having　no　more　to　do　with

the　place　than　if　it　were　a　sort　of　low…water　mark　on　a　lively

beach；　I　say；　seeing　this　and　nothing　else；　I　was　going　out　at　the

gate　when　one　of　the　doors　opened。



'Was　you　looking　for　anything；　sir？'　asked　a　tidy；　well…favoured

woman。



Really；　no；　I　couldn't　say　I　was。



'Not　wanting　any　one；　sir？'



'No　…　at　least　I　…　pray　what　is　the　name　of　the　elderly　gentleman

who　lives　in　the　corner　there？'



The　tidy　woman　stepped　out　to　be　sure　of　the　door　I　indicated；　and

she　and　the　pump　and　I　stood　all　three　in　a　row　with　our　backs　to

the　thoroughfare。



'Oh！　　HIS　name　is　Mr。　Battens；'　said　the　tidy　woman；　dropping　her

voice。



'I　have　just　been　talking　with　him。'



'Indeed？'　said　the　tidy　woman。　　'Ho！　　I　wonder　Mr。　Battens　talked！'



'Is　he　usually　so　silent？'



'Well；　Mr。　Battens　is　the　oldest　here　…　that　is　to　say；　the　oldest

of　the　old　gentlemen　…　in　point　of　residence。'



She　had　a　way　of　passing　her　hands　over　and　under　one　another　as

she　spoke；　that　was　not　only　tidy　but　propitiatory；　so　I　asked　her

if　I　might　look　at　her　little　sitting…room？　　She　willingly　replied

Yes；　and　we　went　into　it　together：　　she　leaving　the　door　open；　with

an　eye　as　I　understood　to　the　social　proprieties。　　The　door　opening

at　once　into　the　room　without　any　intervening　entry；　even　scandal

must　have　been　silenced　by　the　precaution。



It　was　a　gloomy　little　chamber；　but　clean；　and　with　a　mug　of

wallflower　in　the　window。　　On　the　chimney…piece　were　two　peacock's

feathers；　a　carved　ship；　a　few　shells；　and　a　black　profile　with　one

eyelash；　whether　this　portrait　purported　to　be　male　or　female

passed　my　comprehension；　until　my　hostess　informed　me　that　it　was

her　only　son；　and　'quite　a　speaking　one。'



'He　is　alive；　I　hope？'



'No；　sir；'　said　the　widow；　'he　were　cast　away　in　China。'　　This　was

said　with　a　modest　sense　of　its　reflecting　a　certain　geographical

distinction　on　his　mother。



'If　the　old　gentlemen　here　are　not　given　to　talking；'　said　I；　'I

hope　the　old　ladies　are？　…　not　that　you　are　one。'



She　shook　her　head。　　'You　see　they　get　so　cross。'



'How　is　that？'



'Well；　whether　the　gentlemen　really　do　deprive　us　of　any　little

matters　which　ought　to　be　ours　by　rights；　I　cannot　say　for　certain；

but　the　opinion　of　the　old　ones　is　they　do。　　And　Mr。　Battens　he　do

even　go　so　far　as　to　doubt　whether　credit　is　due　to　the　Founder。

For　Mr。　Battens　he　do　say；　anyhow　he　got　his　name　up　by　it　and　he

done　it　cheap。'



'I　am　afraid　the　pump　has　soured　Mr。　Battens。'



'It　may　be　so；'　returned　the　tidy　widow；　'but　the　handle　does　go

very　hard。　　Still；　what　I　say　to　myself　is；　the　gentlemen　MAY　not

pocket　the　difference　between　a　good　pump　and　a　bad　one；　and　I

would　wish　to　think　well　of　them。　　And　the　dwellings；'　said　my

hostess；　glancing　round　her　room；　'perhaps　they　were　convenient

dwellings　in　the　Founder's　time；　considered　AS　his　time；　and

therefore　he　should　not　be　blamed。　　But　Mrs。　Saggers　is　very　hard

upon　them。'



'Mrs。　Saggers　is　the　oldest　here？'



'The　oldest　but　one。　　Mrs。　Quinch　being　the　oldest；　and　have

totally　lost　her　head。'



'And　you？'



'I　am　the　youngest　in　residence；　and　consequently　am　not　looked　up

to。　　But　when　Mrs。　Quinch　makes　a　happy　release；　there　will　be　one

below　me。　　Nor　is　it　to　be　expected　that　Mrs。　Saggers　will　prove

herself　immortal。'



'True。　　Nor　Mr。　Battens。'



'Regarding　the　old　gentlemen；'　said　my　widow　slightingly；　'they

count　among　themselves。　　They　do　not　count　among　us。　　Mr。　Battens

is　that　exceptional　that　he　have　written　to　the　gentlemen　many

times　and