the uncommercial traveller-第43章
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your part; we may have a little … '
'Drop of something to drink;' interposed the stranger。 'I am
agreeable。'
Mr。 Testator had intended to say; 'a little quiet conversation;'
but with great relief of mind adopted the amendment。 He produced a
decanter of gin; and was bustling about for hot water and sugar;
when he found that his visitor had already drunk half of the
decanter's contents。 With hot water and sugar the visitor drank
the remainder before he had been an hour in the chambers by the
chimes of the church of St。 Mary in the Strand; and during the
process he frequently whispered to himself; 'Mine!'
The gin gone; and Mr。 Testator wondering what was to follow it; the
visitor rose and said; with increased stiffness; 'At what hour of
the morning; sir; will it be convenient?' Mr。 Testator hazarded;
'At ten?' 'Sir;' said the visitor; 'at ten; to the moment; I shall
be here。' He then contemplated Mr。 Testator somewhat at leisure;
and said; 'God bless you! How is your wife?' Mr。 Testator (who
never had a wife) replied with much feeling; 'Deeply anxious; poor
soul; but otherwise well。' The visitor thereupon turned and went
away; and fell twice in going down…stairs。 From that hour he was
never heard of。 Whether he was a ghost; or a spectral illusion of
conscience; or a drunken man who had no business there; or the
drunken rightful owner of the furniture; with a transitory gleam of
memory; whether he got safe home; or had no time to get to; whether
he died of liquor on the way; or lived in liquor ever afterwards;
he never was heard of more。 This was the story; received with the
furniture and held to be as substantial; by its second possessor in
an upper set of chambers in grim Lyons Inn。
It is to be remarked of chambers in general; that they must have
been built for chambers; to have the right kind of loneliness。 You
may make a great dwelling…house very lonely; but isolating suites
of rooms and calling them chambers; but you cannot make the true
kind of loneliness。 In dwelling…houses; there have been family
festivals; children have grown in them; girls have bloomed into
women in them; courtships and marriages have taken place in them。
True chambers never were young; childish; maidenly; never had dolls
in them; or rocking…horses; or christenings; or betrothals; or
little coffins。 Let Gray's Inn identify the child who first
touched hands and hearts with Robinson Crusoe; in any one of its
many 'sets;' and that child's little statue; in white marble with a
golden inscription; shall be at its service; at my cost and charge;
as a drinking fountain for the spirit; to freshen its thirsty
square。 Let Lincoln's produce from all its houses; a twentieth of
the procession derivable from any dwelling…house one…twentieth of
its age; of fair young brides who married for love and hope; not
settlements; and all the Vice…Chancellors shall thenceforward be
kept in nosegays for nothing; on application to the writer hereof。
It is not denied that on the terrace of the Adelphi; or in any of
the streets of that subterranean…stable…haunted spot; or about
Bedford…row; or James…street of that ilk (a grewsome place); or
anywhere among the neighbourhoods that have done flowering and have
run to seed; you may find Chambers replete with the accommodations
of Solitude; Closeness; and Darkness; where you may be as low…
spirited as in the genuine article; and might be as easily
murdered; with the placid reputation of having merely gone down to
the sea…side。 But; the many waters of life did run musical in
those dry channels once; … among the Inns; never。 The only popular
legend known in relation to any one of the dull family of Inns; is
a dark Old Bailey whisper concerning Clement's; and importing how
the black creature who holds the sun…dial there; was a negro who
slew his master and built the dismal pile out of the contents of
his strong box … for which architectural offence alone he ought to
have been condemned to live in it。 But; what populace would waste
fancy upon such a place; or on New Inn; Staple Inn; Barnard's Inn;
or any of the shabby crew?
The genuine laundress; too; is an institution not to be had in its
entirety out of and away from the genuine Chambers。 Again; it is
not denied that you may be robbed elsewhere。 Elsewhere you may
have … for money … dishonesty; drunkenness; dirt; laziness; and
profound incapacity。 But the veritable shining…red…faced shameless
laundress; the true Mrs。 Sweeney … in figure; colour; texture; and
smell; like the old damp family umbrella; the tip…top complicated
abomination of stockings; spirits; bonnet; limpness; looseness; and
larceny; is only to be drawn at the fountain…head。 Mrs。 Sweeney is
beyond the reach of individual art。 It requires the united efforts
of several men to ensure that great result; and it is only
developed in perfection under an Honourable Society and in an Inn
of Court。
CHAPTER XV … NURSE'S STORIES
There are not many places that I find it more agreeable to revisit
when I am in an idle mood; than some places to which I have never
been。 For; my acquaintance with those spots is of such long
standing; and has ripened into an intimacy of so affectionate a
nature; that I take a particular interest in assuring myself that
they are unchanged。
I never was in Robinson Crusoe's Island; yet I frequently return
there。 The colony he established on it soon faded away; and it is
uninhabited by any descendants of the grave and courteous
Spaniards; or of Will Atkins and the other mutineers; and has
relapsed into its original condition。 Not a twig of its wicker
houses remains; its goats have long run wild again; its screaming
parrots would darken the sun with a cloud of many flaming colours
if a gun were fired there; no face is ever reflected in the waters
of the little creek which Friday swam across when pursued by his
two brother cannibals with sharpened stomachs。 After comparing
notes with other travellers who have similarly revisited the Island
and conscientiously inspected it; I have satisfied myself that it
contains no vestige of Mr。 Atkins's domesticity or theology; though
his track on the memorable evening of his landing to set his
captain ashore; when he was decoyed about and round about until it
was dark; and his boat was stove; and his strength and spirits
failed him; is yet plainly to be traced。 So is the hill…top on
which Robinson was struck dumb with joy when the reinstated captain
pointed to the ship; riding within half a mile of the shore; that
was to bear him away; in the nine…and…twentieth year of his
seclusion in that lonely place。 So is the sandy beach on which the
memorable footstep was impressed; and where the savages hauled up
their canoes when they came ashore for those dreadful public
dinners; which led to a dancing worse than speech…making。 So is
the cave where the flaring eyes of the old goat made such a goblin
appearance in the dark。 So is the site of the hut where Robinson
lived with the dog and the parrot and the cat; and where he endured
those first agonies of solitude; which … strange to say … never
involved any ghostly fancies; a circumstance so very remarkable;
that perhaps he left out something in writing his record? Round
hundreds of such objects; hidden in the dense tropical foliage; the
tropical sea breaks evermore; and over them the tropical sky;
saving in the short rainy season; shines bright and cloudless。
Neither; was I ever belated among wolves; on the borders of France
and Spain; nor; did I ever; when night was closing in and the
ground was covered with snow; draw up my little company among some
felled trees which served as a breastwork; and there fire a train
of gunpowder so dexterously that suddenly we had three or four
score blazing wolves illuminating the darkness around us。
Nevertheless; I occasionally go back to that dismal region and