the uncommercial traveller-第35章

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shoulder　against　the　door…post；　as　my　childish　eyes　had　seen　him

many　a　time；　indeed；　there　was　his　old　mark　on　the　door…post　yet；

as　if　his　shadow　had　become　a　fixture　there。　　It　was　he　himself；　he

might　formerly　have　been　an　old…looking　young　man；　or　he　might　now

be　a　young…looking　old　man；　but　there　he　was。　　In　walking　along　the

street；　I　had　as　yet　looked　in　vain　for　a　familiar　face；　or　even　a

transmitted　face；　here　was　the　very　greengrocer　who　had　been

weighing　and　handling　baskets　on　the　morning　of　the　reception。　　As

he　brought　with　him　a　dawning　remembrance　that　he　had　had　no

proprietary　interest　in　those　babies；　I　crossed　the　road；　and

accosted　him　on　the　subject。　　He　was　not　in　the　least　excited　or

gratified；　or　in　any　way　roused；　by　the　accuracy　of　my

recollection；　but　said；　Yes；　summut　out　of　the　common　…　he　didn't

remember　how　many　it　was　（as　if　half…a…dozen　babes　either　way　made

no　difference）　…　had　happened　to　a　Mrs。　What's…her…name；　as　once

lodged　there　…　but　he　didn't　call　it　to　mind；　particular。　　Nettled

by　this　phlegmatic　conduct；　I　informed　him　that　I　had　left　the　town

when　I　was　a　child。　　He　slowly　returned；　quite　unsoftened；　and　not

without　a　sarcastic　kind　of　complacency；　HAD　I？　　Ah！　　And　did　I

find　it　had　got　on　tolerably　well　without　me？　　Such　is　the

difference　（I　thought；　when　I　had　left　him　a　few　hundred　yards

behind；　and　was　by　so　much　in　a　better　temper）　between　going　away

from　a　place　and　remaining　in　it。　　I　had　no　right；　I　reflected；　to

be　angry　with　the　greengrocer　for　his　want　of　interest；　I　was

nothing　to　him：　　whereas　he　was　the　town；　the　cathedral；　the

bridge；　the　river；　my　childhood；　and　a　large　slice　of　my　life；　to

me。



Of　course　the　town　had　shrunk　fearfully；　since　I　was　a　child　there。

I　had　entertained　the　impression　that　the　High…street　was　at　least

as　wide　as　Regent…street；　London；　or　the　Italian　Boulevard　at

Paris。　　I　found　it　little　better　than　a　lane。　　There　was　a　public

clock　in　it；　which　I　had　supposed　to　be　the　finest　clock　in　the

world：　　whereas　it　now　turned　out　to　be　as　inexpressive；　moon…

faced；　and　weak　a　clock　as　ever　I　saw。　　It　belonged　to　a　Town　Hall；

where　I　had　seen　an　Indian　（who　I　now　suppose　wasn't　an　Indian）

swallow　a　sword　（which　I　now　suppose　he　didn't）。　　The　edifice　had

appeared　to　me　in　those　days　so　glorious　a　structure；　that　I　had

set　it　up　in　my　mind　as　the　model　on　which　the　Genie　of　the　Lamp

built　the　palace　for　Aladdin。　　A　mean　little　brick　heap；　like　a

demented　chapel；　with　a　few　yawning　persons　in　leather　gaiters；　and

in　the　last　extremity　for　something　to　do；　lounging　at　the　door

with　their　hands　in　their　pockets；　and　calling　themselves　a　Corn

Exchange！



The　Theatre　was　in　existence；　I　found；　on　asking　the　fishmonger；

who　had　a　compact　show　of　stock　in　his　window；　consisting　of　a　sole

and　a　quart　of　shrimps　…　and　I　resolved　to　comfort　my　mind　by　going

to　look　at　it。　　Richard　the　Third；　in　a　very　uncomfortable　cloak；

had　first　appeared　to　me　there；　and　had　made　my　heart　leap　with

terror　by　backing　up　against　the　stage…box　in　which　I　was　posted；

while　struggling　for　life　against　the　virtuous　Richmond。　　It　was

within　those　walls　that　I　had　learnt　as　from　a　page　of　English

history；　how　that　wicked　King　slept　in　war…time　on　a　sofa　much　too

short　for　him；　and　how　fearfully　his　conscience　troubled　his　boots。

There；　too；　had　I　first　seen　the　funny　countryman；　but　countryman

of　noble　principles；　in　a　flowered　waistcoat；　crunch　up　his　little

hat　and　throw　it　on　the　ground；　and　pull　off　his　coat；　saying；　'Dom

thee；　squire；　coom　on　with　thy　fistes　then！'　　At　which　the　lovely

young　woman　who　kept　company　with　him　（and　who　went　out　gleaning；

in　a　narrow　white　muslin　apron　with　five　beautiful　bars　of　five

different…coloured　ribbons　across　it）　was　so　frightened　for　his

sake；　that　she　fainted　away。　　Many　wondrous　secrets　of　Nature　had　I

come　to　the　knowledge　of　in　that　sanctuary：　　of　which　not　the　least

terrific　were；　that　the　witches　in　Macbeth　bore　an　awful

resemblance　to　the　Thanes　and　other　proper　inhabitants　of　Scotland；

and　that　the　good　King　Duncan　couldn't　rest　in　his　grave；　but　was

constantly　coming　out　of　it　and　calling　himself　somebody　else。　　To

the　Theatre；　therefore；　I　repaired　for　consolation。　　But　I　found

very　little；　for　it　was　in　a　bad　and　declining　way。　　A　dealer　in

wine　and　bottled　beer　had　already　squeezed　his　trade　into　the　box…

office；　and　the　theatrical　money　was　taken　…　when　it　came　…　in　a

kind　of　meat…safe　in　the　passage。　　The　dealer　in　wine　and　bottled

beer　must　have　insinuated　himself　under　the　stage　too；　for　he

announced　that　he　had　various　descriptions　of　alcoholic　drinks　'in

the　wood；'　and　there　was　no　possible　stowage　for　the　wood　anywhere

else。　　Evidently；　he　was　by　degrees　eating　the　establishment　away

to　the　core；　and　would　soon　have　sole　possession　of　it。　　It　was　To

Let；　and　hopelessly　so；　for　its　old　purposes；　and　there　had　been　no

entertainment　within　its　walls　for　a　long　time　except　a　Panorama；

and　even　that　had　been　announced　as　'pleasingly　instructive；'　and　I

know　too　well　the　fatal　meaning　and　the　leaden　import　of　those

terrible　expressions。　　No；　there　was　no　comfort　in　the　Theatre。　　It

was　mysteriously　gone；　like　my　own　youth。　　Unlike　my　own　youth；　it

might　be　coming　back　some　day；　but　there　was　little　promise　of　it。



As　the　town　was　placarded　with　references　to　the　Dullborough

Mechanics'　Institution；　I　thought　I　would　go　and　look　at　that

establishment　next。　　There　had　been　no　such　thing　in　the　town；　in

my　young　day；　and　it　occurred　to　me　that　its　extreme　prosperity

might　have　brought　adversity　upon　the　Drama。　　I　found　the

Institution　with　some　difficulty；　and　should　scarcely　have　known

that　I　had　found　it　if　I　had　judged　from　its　external　appearance

only；　but　this　was　attributable　to　its　never　having　been　finished；

and　having　no　front：　　consequently；　it　led　a　modest　and　retired

existence　up　a　stable…yard。　　It　was　（as　I　learnt；　on　inquiry）　a

most　flourishing　Institution；　and　of　the　highest　benefit　to　the

town：　　two　triumphs　which　I　was　glad　to　understand　were　not　at　all

impaired　by　the　seeming　drawbacks　that　no　mechanics　belonged　to　it；

and　that　it　was　steeped　in　debt　to　the　chimney…pots。　　It　had　a

large　room；　which　was　approached　by　an　infirm　step…ladder：　　the

builder　having　declined　to　construct　the　intended　staircase；

without　a　present　payment　in　cash；　which　Dullborough　（though

profoundly　appreciative　of　the　Institution）　seemed　unaccountably

bashful　about　subscribing。　　The　large　room　had　cost　…　or　would；

when　paid　for　…　five　hundred　pounds；　and　it　had　more　mortar　in　it

and　more　echoes；　than　one　might　have　expected　to　get　for　the　money。

It　was　fitted　up　with　a　platform；　and　the　usual　lecturing　tools；

including　a　large　black　board　of　a　menacing　appearance。　　On

referring　to　lists　of　the　courses　of　lectures　that　had　been　given

in　this　thriving　Hall；　I　fancied　I　detected　a　shyness　in　admitting

that　human　nature　when　at　leisure　has　any　desire　whatever　to　be

relieved　and　diverted；　and　a　furtive　sliding　in　of　any　poor　make…

weight　piece　of　amusement；　shame…facedly　and　edgewise。　　Thus；　I

observed　that　it　was　necessary　for　the　members　to　be　knocked　on　the

head　with　Gas；　Air；　Water；　Food；　the　Solar　System；　the　Geological

periods；　Criticism　on　Milton；　the　Steam…engine；　John　Bunyan；　and

Arrow…Headed　Inscriptions；　before　they　might　be　tickled　by　those

unaccountable　choristers；　the　negro　singers　in　the　court　costume　of

the　reign　of　George　the　Second。　　Likewise；　that　they　must　be

stunned　by　a　weighty　inquiry　whether　there　was　internal　evidence　in

Shakespeare's　works；　to　prove　that　his　uncle　by　the　mother's　side

lived　for　some　years　at　Stoke　Newington；　before　they　were　brought…

to　by　a　Miscellaneous　Concert。　　But；　indeed；　the　masking　of

entertainment；　and　pretending　it　was　something　else　…　as　people

mask　bedsteads　when　they　are　obliged　to　have　them　in　sitting…rooms；

and　make　bel