the new machiavelli-第102章

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looking　at　me　very　steadfastly。



〃Come　here；〃　she　whispered。　　〃Never　mind　the　porters。　　What　can　they　

know？　　Just　one　time　moreI　must。〃



She　rested　her　hand　against　the　door　of　the　carriage　and　bent　down　

upon　me；　and　put　her　cold；　moist　lips　to　mine。







CHAPTER　THE　THIRD



THE　BREAKING　POINT







1





And　then　we　broke　down。　　We　broke　our　faith　with　both　Margaret　and　

Shoesmith；　flung　career　and　duty　out　of　our　lives；　and　went　away　

together。



It　is　only　now；　almost　a　year　after　these　events；　that　I　can　begin　

to　see　what　happened　to　me。　　At　the　time　it　seemed　to　me　I　was　a　

rational；　responsible　creature；　but　indeed　I　had　not　parted　from　her　

two　days　before　I　became　a　monomaniac　to　whom　nothing　could　matter　

but　Isabel。　　Every　truth　had　to　be　squared　to　that　obsession；　every　

duty。　　It　astounds　me　to　think　how　I　forgot　Margaret；　forgot　my　

work；　forgot　everything　but　that　we　two　were　parted。　　I　still　

believe　that　with　better　chances　we　might　have　escaped　the　

consequences　of　the　emotional　storm　that　presently　seized　us　both。　　

But　we　had　no　foresight　of　that；　and　no　preparation　for　it；　and　our　

circumstances　betrayed　us。　　It　was　partly　Shoesmith's　unwisdom　in　

delaying　his　marriage　until　after　the　end　of　the　sessionpartly　my　

own　amazing　folly　in　returning　within　four　days　to　Westminster。　　But　

we　were　all　of　us　intent　upon　the　defeat　of　scandal　and　the　complete　

restoration　of　appearances。　　It　seemed　necessary　that　Shoesmith's　

marriage　should　not　seem　to　be　hurried；　still　more　necessary　that　I　

should　not　vanish　inexplicably。　　I　had　to　be　visible　with　Margaret　

in　London　just　as　much　as　possible；　we　went　to　restaurants；　we　

visited　the　theatre；　we　could　even　contemplate　the　possibility　of　my　

presence　at　the　wedding。　　For　that；　however；　we　had　schemed　a　

weekend　visit　to　Wales；　and　a　fictitious　sprained　ankle　at　the　last　

moment　which　would　justify　my　absence。　。　。　。



I　cannot　convey　to　you　the　intolerable　wretchedness　and　rebellion　of　

my　separation　from　Isabel。　　It　seemed　that　in　the　past　two　years　all　

my　thoughts　had　spun　commisures　to　Isabel's　brain　and　I　could　think　

of　nothing　that　did　not　lead　me　surely　to　the　need　of　the　one　

intimate　I　had　found　in　the　world。　　I　came　back　to　the　House　and　the　

office　and　my　home；　I　filled　all　my　days　with　appointments　and　duty；　

and　it　did　not　save　me　in　the　least　from　a　lonely　emptiness　such　as　

I　had　never　felt　before　in　all　my　life。　　I　had　little　sleep。　　In　the　

daytime　I　did　a　hundred　things；　I　even　spoke　in　the　House　on　two　

occasions；　and　by　my　own　low　standards　spoke　well；　and　it　seemed　to　

me　that　I　was　going　about　in　my　own　brain　like　a　hushed　survivor　in　

a　house　whose　owner　lies　dead　upstairs。



I　came　to　a　crisis　after　that　wild　dinner　of　Tarvrille's。　　Something　

in　that　stripped　my　soul　bare。



It　was　an　occasion　made　absurd　and　strange　by　the　odd　accident　that　

the　house　caught　fire　upstairs　while　we　were　dining　below。　　It　was　a　

men's　dinner〃　　A　dinner　of　all　sorts；〃　said　Tarvrille；　when　he　

invited　me；　〃everything　from　Evesham　and　Gane　to　Wilkins　the　author；　

and　Heaven　knows　what　will　happen！〃　　I　remember　that　afterwards　

Tarvrille　was　accused　of　having　planned　the　fire　to　make　his　dinner　

a　marvel　and　a　memory。　　It　was　indeed　a　wonderful　occasion；　and　I　

suppose　if　I　had　not　been　altogether　drenched　in　misery；　I　should　

have　found　the　same　wild　amusement　in　it　that　glowed　in　all　the　

others。　　There　were　one　or　two　university　dons；　Lord　George　Fester；　

the　racing　man；　Panmure；　the　artist；　two　or　three　big　City　men；　

Weston　Massinghay　and　another　prominent　Liberal　whose　name　I　can't　

remember；　the　three　men　Tarvrille　had　promised　and　Esmeer；　Lord　

Wrassleton；　Waulsort；　the　member　for　Monckton；　Neal　and　several　

others。　　We　began　a　little　coldly；　with　duologues；　but　the　

conversation　was　already　becoming　generalso　far　as　such　a　long　

table　permittedwhen　the　fire　asserted　itself。



It　asserted　itself　first　as　a　penetrating　and　emphatic　smell　of　

burning　rubber；it　was　caused　by　the　fusing　of　an　electric　wire。　　

The　reek　forced　its　way　into　the　discussion　of　the　Pekin　massacres　

that　had　sprung　up　between　Evesham；　Waulsort；　and　the　others　at　the　

end　of　the　table。　　〃Something　burning；〃　said　the　man　next　to　me。



〃Something　must　be　burning；〃　said　Panmure。



Tarvrille　hated　undignified　interruptions。　　He　had　a　particularly　

imperturbable　butler　with　a　cadaverous　sad　face　and　an　eye　of　rigid　

disapproval。　　He　spoke　to　this　individual　over　his　shoulder。　　〃Just　

see；　will　you；〃　he　said；　and　caught　up　the　pause　in　the　talk　to　his　

left。



Wilkins　was　asking　questions；　and　I；　too；　was　curious。　　The　story　of　

the　siege　of　the　Legations　in　China　in　the　year　1900　and　all　that　

followed　upon　that；　is　just　one　of　those　disturbing　interludes　in　

history　that　refuse　to　join　on　to　that　general　scheme　of　

protestation　by　which　civilisation　is　maintained。　　It　is　a　break　in　

the　general　flow　of　experience　as　disconcerting　to　statecraft　as　the　

robbery　of　my　knife　and　the　scuffle　that　followed　it　had　been　to　me　

when　I　was　a　boy　at　Penge。　　It　is　like　a　tear　in　a　curtain　revealing　

quite　unexpected　backgrounds。　　I　had　never　given　the　business　a　

thought　for　years；　now　this　talk　brought　back　a　string　of　pictures　

to　my　mind；　how　the　reliefs　arrived　and　the　plundering　began；　how　

section　after　section　of　the　International　Army　was　drawn　into　

murder　and　pillage；　how　the　infection　spread　upward　until　the　wives　

of　Ministers　were　busy　looting；　and　the　very　sentinels　stripped　and　

crawled　like　snakes　into　the　Palace　they　were　set　to　guard。　　It　did　

not　stop　at　robbery；　men　were　murdered；　women；　being　plundered；　were　

outraged；　children　were　butchered；　strong　men　had　found　themselves　

with　arms　in　a　lawless；　defenceless　city；　and　this　had　followed。　　

Now　it　was　all　recalled。



〃Respectable　ladies　addicted　to　district　visiting　at　home　were　as　

bad　as　any　one；〃　said　Panmure。　　〃Glazebrook　told　me　of　oneflushed　

like　a　woman　at　a　bargain　sale；　he　saidand　when　he　pointed　out　to　

her　that　the　silk　she'd　got　was　bloodstained；　she　just　said；　'Oh；　

bother！'　and　threw　it　aside　and　went　back。　。　。　。〃



We　became　aware　that　Tarvrille's　butler　had　returned。　　We　tried　not　

to　seem　to　listen。



〃Beg　pardon；　m'lord；〃　he　said。　　〃The　house　IS　on　fire；　m'lord。〃



〃Upstairs；　m'lord。〃



〃Just　overhead；　m'lord。〃



〃The　maids　are　throwing　water；　m'lord；　and　I've　telephoned　FIRE。〃



〃No；　m'lord；　no　immediate　danger。〃



〃It's　all　right；〃　said　Tarvrille　to　the　table　generally。　　Go　on！　　

It's　not　a　general　conflagration；　and　the　fire　brigade　won't　be　five　

minutes。　　Don't　see　that　it's　our　affair。　　The　stuff's　insured。　　

They　say　old　Lady　Paskershortly　was　dreadful。　　Like　a　harpy。　　The　

Dowager　Empress　had　shown　her　some　little　things　of　hers。　　Pet　

thingshidden　away。　　Susan　went　straight　for　themused　to　take　an　

umbrella　for　the　silks。　　Born　shoplifter。〃



It　was　evident　he　didn't　want　his　dinner　spoilt；　and　we　played　up　

loyally。



〃This　is　recorded　history；〃　said　Wilkins；〃　practically。　　It　makes　

one　wonder　about　unrecorded　history。　　In　India；　for　example。〃



But　nobody　touched　that。



〃Thompson；〃　said　Tarvrille　to　the　imperturbable　butler；　and　

indicating　the　table　generally；　〃champagne。　　Champagne。　　Keep　it　

going。〃



〃M'lord；〃　and　Thompson　marshalled　his　assistants。



Some　man　I　didn't　know　began　to　remember　things　about　Mandalay。　　

〃It's　queer；〃　he　said；　〃how　people　break　out　at　times；〃　and　told　his　

story　of　an　army　doctor；　brave；　public…spirited；　and；　as　it　

happened；　deeply　religious；　who　was　caught　one　evening　by　the　

excitement　of　plunderingand　stole　and　hid；　twisted　the　wrist　of　a　

boy　until　it　broke；　and　was　afterwards　overcome　by　wild　remorse。



I　watched　Evesham　listening　intently。　　〃Strange；〃　he　said；　〃very　

strange。　　We　are　such　stuff　as　thieves　are　ma