the dwelling place of ligh-第46章
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now； the boy resembled Ditmar； but the features of the girl； heavy and
stamped with self…indulgence； were evidently reminiscent of the woman who
had been his wife。 Then the shade was pulled down； abruptly； and Janet；
overcome by a sense of horror at her position； took to flight。。。。
When； after covering the space of a block she slowed down and tried to
imagine herself as established in that house； the stepmother of those
children； she found it impossible。 Despite the fact that her attention
had been focussed so strongly on them； the fringe of her vision had
included their surroundings； the costly furniture； the piano against the
farther wall； the music rack。 Evidently the girl was learning to play。
She felt a renewed； intenser bitterness against her own lot： she was
aware of something within her better and finer than the girl； than the
woman who had been her mother had possessedthat in her； Janet； had
lacked the advantages of development。 Could itcould it ever be
developed now？ Had this love which had come to her brought her any
nearer to the unknown realm of light she craved？。。。
CHAPTER XI
Though December had come； Sunday was like an April day before whose
sunlight the night…mists of scruples and morbid fears were scattered and
dispersed。 And Janet； as she fared forth from the Fillmore Street flat；
felt resurging in her the divine recklessness that is the very sap of
life。 The future； save of the immediate hours to come； lost its power
over her。 The blue and white beauty of the sky proclaimed all things
possible for the strong； and the air was vibrant with the sweet music of
bells； calling her to happiness。 She was going to meet happiness； to
meet loveto meet Ditmar！ The trolley which she took in Faber Street；
though lagging in its mission； seemed an agent of that happiness as it
left the city behind it and wound along the heights beside the tarvia
roadway above the river； bright glimpses of which she caught through the
openings in the woods。 And when she looked out of the window on her
right she beheld on a little forested rise a succession of tiny 〃camps〃
built by residents of Hampton whose modest incomes could not afford more
elaborate summer places； camps of all descriptions and colours； with
queer names that made her smile： 〃The Cranny；〃 〃The Nook；〃 〃Snug
Harbour；〃 〃Buena Vista；〃of course；which she thought pretty； though
she did not know its meaning； and another； in German； equally perplexing；
〃Klein aber Mein。〃 Though the windows of these places were now boarded
up； though the mosquito netting still clung rather dismally to the
porches； they were mutely suggestive of contentment and domestic joy。
Scarcely had she alighted from the car at the rendezvous he had
mentioned； beside the now deserted boathouse where in the warm weather
the members of the Hampton Rowing Club disported themselves； when she saw
an automobile approachingand recognized it as the gay 〃roadster〃 Ditmar
had exhibited to her that summer afternoon by the canal； and immediately
Ditmar himself； bringing it to a stop and leaping from it； stood before
her in the sunlight； radiating； as it seemed； more sunlight still。 With
his clipped； blond moustache and his straw…coloured hairas yet but
slightly grey at the templeshe looked a veritable conquering berserker
in his huge coat of golden fur。 Never had he appeared to better
advantage。
〃I was waiting for you；〃 he said； 〃I saw you in the car。〃 Turning to the
automobile； he stripped the tissue paper from a cluster of dark red roses
with the priceless long stems of which Lise used to rave when she worked
in the flower store。 And he held the flowers against her suit her new
suit she had worn for this meeting。
〃Oh；〃 she cried； taking a deep； intoxicating breath of their fragrance。
〃You brought thesefor me？〃
〃From Bostonmy beauty！〃
〃But I can't wear all of them！〃
〃Why not？〃 he demanded。 〃Haven't you a pin？〃
She produced one； attaching them with a gesture that seemed habitual；
though the thought of their valuerevealing in some degree her own worth
in his eyes…unnerved her。 She was warmly conscious of his gaze。 Then he
turned； and opening a compartment at the back of the car drew from it a
bright tweed motor coat warmly lined。
〃Oh； no！〃 she protested； drawing back。 〃I'llI'll be warm enough。〃 But
laughingly； triumphantly； he seized her and thrust her arms in the
sleeves； his fingers pressing against her。 Overcome by shyness； she drew
away from him。
〃I made a pretty good guess at the sizedidn't I； Janet？〃 he cried；
delightedly surveying her。 〃I couldn't forget it！〃 His glance grew more
concentrated； warmer； penetrating。
〃You mustn't look at me like that！〃 she pleaded with lowered eyes。
〃Why notyou're minearen't you？ You're mine； now。〃
〃I don't know。 There are lots of things I want to talk about；〃 she
replied； but her protest sounded feeble； unconvincing； even to herself。
He fairly lifted her into the automobileit was a caress； only tempered
by the semipublicity of the place。 He was giving her no time to think
but she did not want to； think。 Starting the engine； he got in and
leaned toward her。
〃Not here！〃 she exclaimed。
〃All rightI'll wait；〃 he agreed； tucking the robe about her deftly；
solicitously； and she sank back against the seat； surrendering herself to
the luxury； the wonder of being cherished； the caressing and sheltering
warmth she felt of security and love； the sense of emancipation from
discontent and sordidness and struggle。 For a moment she closed her
eyes； but opened them again to behold the transformed image of herself
reflected in the windshield to confirm the illusionif indeed it were
one！ The tweed coat seemed startlingly white in the sunlight； and the
woman she saw； yet recognized as herself； was one of the fortunately
placed of the earth with power and beauty at her command！ And she could
no longer imagine herself as the same person who the night before had
stood in front of the house in Warren Street。 The car was speeding over
the smooth surface of the boulevard； the swift motion； which seemed to
her like that of flying； the sparkling air； the brightness of the day；
the pressure of Ditmar's shoulder against hers； thrilled her。 She
marvelled at his sure command over the machine； that responded like a
live thing to his touch。 On the wide； straight stretches it went at a
mad pace that took her breath； and again； in turning a corner or passing
another car； it slowed down； purring in meek obedience。 Once she gasped：
〃Not so fast！ I can't stand it。〃
He laughed and obeyed her。 They glided between river and sky across the
delicate fabric of a bridge which but a moment before she had seen in the
distance。 Running through the little village on the farther bank； they
left the river。
〃Where are you going？〃 she asked。
〃Oh； for a little spin；〃 he answered indulgently； turning into a side
road that wound through the woods and suddenly stopping。 〃Janet； we've
got this daythis whole day to ourselves。〃 He seized and drew her to
him； and she yielded dizzily； repaying the passion of his kiss； forgetful
of past and future while he held her； whispering brokenly endearing
phrases。
〃You'll ruin my roses；〃 she protested breathlessly； at last； when it
seemed that she could no longer bear this embrace； nor the pressure of
his lips。 〃There！ you see you're crushing them！〃 She undid them； and
buttoning the coat； held them to her face。 Their odour made her faint：
her eyes were clouded。
〃Listen； Claude！〃 she said at last；it was the first time she had called
him sogetting free。 〃You must be sensible！ some one might come along。〃
〃I'll never get enough of you！〃 he said。 〃I can't believe it yet。〃 And
added irrelevantly： 〃Pin the roses outside。〃
She shook her head。 Something in her protested against this too public
advertisement of their love。
〃I'd rather hold them；〃 she answered。 〃Let's go on。〃 He started the car
again。 〃Listen； I want to talk to you； seriously。 I've been thinking。〃
〃Don't I know you've been thinking！〃 he told her exuberantly。 〃If I
could only find out what's always going on in that little head of
