fraternity-第58章

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！


es　scimitar…shaped　reeds　clustering　black　along　the　pool's　shore。　　All　about　him　the　may…flowers　were　alight。　　It　was　such　a　night　as　makes　dreams　real　and　turns　reality　to　dreams。

'All　moonlit　nonsense！'　thought　the　young　man；　for　the　night　had　disturbed　his　heart。

But　Thyme　did　not　come　back。　　He　called　to　her；　and　in　the　death…like　silence　following　his　shouts　he　could　hear　his　own　heart　beat。　　He　passed　in　through　the　gate。　　She　was　nowhere　to　be　seen。　　Why　was　she　playing　him　this　trick？

He　turned　up　from　the　water　among　the　trees；　where　the　incense　of　the　may…flowers　hung　heavy　in　the　air。

'Never　look　for　a　thing！'　he　thought；　and　stopped　to　listen。　　It　was　so　breathless　that　the　leaves　of　a　low　bough　against　his　cheek　did　not　stir　while　he　stood　there。　　Presently　he　heard　faint　sounds；　and　stole　towards　them。　　Under　a　beech…tree　he　almost　stumbled　over　Thyme；　lying　with　her　face　pressed　to　the　ground。　　The　young　doctor's　heart　gave　a　sickening　leap；　he　quickly　knelt　down　beside　her。　　The　girl's　body；　pressed　close　to　the　dry　beech…mat；　was　being　shaken　by　long　sobs。　　From　head　to　foot　it　quivered；　her　hat　had　been　torn　off；　and　the　fragrance　of　her　hair　mingled　with　the　fragrance　of　the　night。　　In　Martin's　heart　something　seemed　to　turn　over　and　over；　as　when　a　boy　he　had　watched　a　rabbit　caught　in　a　snare。　　He　touched　her。　　She　sat　up；　and；　dashing　her　hand　across　her　eyes；　cried：　〃Go　away！　Oh；　go　away！〃

He　put　his　arm　round　her　and　waited。　　Five　minutes　passed。　　The　air　was　trembling　with　a　sort　of　pale　vibration；　for　the　moonlight　had　found　a　hole　in　the　dark　foliage　and　flooded　on　to　the　ground　beside　them；　whitening　the　black　beech…husks。　　Some　tiny　bird；　disturbed　by　these　unwonted　visitors；　began　chirruping　and　fluttering；　but　was　soon　still　again。　　To　Martin；　so　strangely　close　to　this　young　creature　in　the　night；　there　came　a　sense　of　utter　disturbance。

'Poor　little　thing！'　he　thought；　'be　careful　of　her；　comfort　her！'　Hardness　seemed　so　broken　out　of　her；　and　the　night　so　wonderful！　And　there　came　into　the　young　man's　heart　a　throb　of　the　knowledge　very　rare　with　him；　for　he　was　not；　like　Hilary；　a　philosophising　personthat　she　was　as　real　as　himselfsuffering；　hoping；　feeling；　not　his　hopes　and　feelings；　but　her　own。　　His　fingers　kept　pressing　her　shoulder　through　her　thin　blouse。　　And　the　touch　of　those　fingers　was　worth　more　than　any　words；　as　this　night；　all　moonlit　dreams；　was　worth　more　than　a　thousand　nights　of　sane　reality。

Thyme　twisted　herself　away　from　him　at　last。　　〃I　can't；〃　she　sobbed。　〃I'm　not　what　you　thought　meI'm　not　made　for　it！〃

A　scornful　little　smile　curled　Martin's　lip。　　So　that　was　it！　　But　the　smile　soon　died　away。　　One　did　not　hit　what　was　already　down

Thyme's　voice　wailed　through　the　silence。　　〃I　thought　I　couldbut　I　want　beautiful　things。　　I　can't　bear　it　all　so　grey　and　horrible。　I'm　not　like　that　girl。　　I'm…an…amateur！〃

'If　I　kissed　her…'　Martin　thought。

She　sank　down　again；　burying　her　face　in　the　dark　beech…mat。　　The　moonlight　had　passed　on。　　Her　voice　came　faint　and　stiffed；　as　out　of　the　tomb　of　faith。　　〃I'm　no　good。　　I　never　shall　be。　　I'm　as　bad　as　mother！〃

But　to　Martin　there　was　only　the　scent　of　her　hair。

〃No；〃　murmured　Thyme's　voice；　〃I'm　only　fit　for　miserable　Art。。。。　I'm　only　fit　fornothing！〃

They　were　so　close　together　on　the　dark　beech　mat　that　their　bodies　touched；　and　a　longing　to　clasp　her　in　his　arms　came　over　him。

〃I'm　a　selfish　beast！〃　moaned　the　smothered　voice。　　〃I　don't　really　care　for　all　these　peopleI　only　care　because　they're　ugly　for　me　to　see！〃

Martin　reached　his　hand　out　to　her　hair。　　If　she　had　shrunk　away　he　would　have　seized　her；　but　as　though　by　instinct　she　let　it　rest　there。　　And　at　her　sudden　stillness；　strange　and　touching；　Martin's　quick　passion　left　him。　　He　slipped　his　arm　round　her　and　raised　her　up；　as　if　she　had　been　a　child；　and　for　a　long　time　sat　listening　with　a　queer　twisted　smile　to　the　moanings　of　her　lost　illusions。

The　dawn　found　them　still　sitting　there　against　the　bole　of　the　beech…tree。　　Her　lips　were　parted；　the　tears　had　dried　on　her　sleeping　face；　pillowed　against　his　shoulder；　while　he　still　watched　her　sideways　with　the　ghost　of　that　twisted　smile。

And　beyond　the　grey　water；　like　some　tired　wanton；　the　moon　in　an　orange　hood　was　stealing　down　to　her　rest　between　the　trees。




CHAPTER　XXXVI

STEPHEN　SIGNS　CHEQUES

Cecilia　received　the　mystic　document　containing　these　words　〃Am　quite　all　right。　　Address；　598；　Euston　Road；　three　doors　off　Martin。　Letter　follows　explaining。　　Thyme；〃　she　had　not　even　realised　her　little　daughter's　departure。　　She　went　up　to　Thyme's　room　at　once；　and　opening　all　the　drawers　and　cupboards；　stared　into　them　one　by　one。　　The　many　things　she　saw　there　allayed　the　first　pangs　of　her　disquiet。

'She　has　only　taken　one　little　trunk；'　she　thought；　'and　left　all　her　evening　frocks。'

This　act　of　independence　alarmed　rather　than　surprised　her；　such　had　been　her　sense　of　the　unrest　in　the　domestic　atmosphere　during　the　last　month。　　Since　the　evening　when　she　had　found　Thyme　in　foods　of　tears　because　of　the　Hughs'　baby；　her　maternal　eyes　had　not　failed　to　notice　something　new　in　the　child's　demeanoura　moodiness；　an　air　almost　of　conspiracy；　together　with　an　emphatic　increase　of　youthful　sarcasm：　Fearful　of　probing　deep；　she　had　sought　no　confidence；　nor　had　she　divulged　her　doubts　to　Stephen。

Amongst　the　blouses　a　sheet　of　blue　ruled　paper；　which　had　evidently　escaped　from　a　notebook；　caught　her　eye。　　Sentences　were　scrawled　on　it　in　pencil。　　Cecilia　read：　〃That　poor　little　dead　thing　was　so　grey　and　pinched；　and　I　seemed　to　realise　all　of　a　sudden　how　awful　it　is　for　them。　　I　mustI　mustI　will　do　something！〃

Cecilia　dropped　the　sheet　of　paper；　her　hand　was　trembling。　　There　was　no　mystery　in　that　departure　now；　and　Stephen's　words　came　into　her　mind：　〃It's　all　very　well　up　to　a　certain　point；　and　nobody　sympathises　with　them　more　than　I　do；　but　after　that　it　becomes　destructive　of　all　comfort；　and　that　does　no　good　to　anyone。〃

The　sound　sense　of　those　words　had　made　her　feel　queer　when　they　were　spoken；　they　were　even　more　sensible　than　she　had　thought。　　Did　her　little　daughter；　so　young　and　pretty；　seriously　mean　to　plunge　into　the　rescue　work　of　dismal　slums；　to　cut　herself　adrift　from　sweet　sounds　and　scents　and　colours；　from　music　and　art；　from　dancing；　flowers；　and　all　that　made　life　beautiful？　　The　secret　forces　of　fastidiousness；　an　inborn　dread　of　the　fanatical；　and　all　her　real　ignorance　of　what　such　a　life　was　like；　rose　in　Cecilia　with　a　force　which　made　her　feel　quite　sick。　　Better　that　she　herself　should　do　this　thing　than　that　her　own　child　should　be　deprived　of　air　and　light　and　all　the　just　environment　of　her　youth　and　beauty。　　'She　must　come　backshe　must　listen　to　me！'　she　thought。　　'We　will　begin　together；　we　will　start　a　nice　little　creche　of　our　own；　orperhaps　Mrs。　Tallents　Smallpeace　could　find　us　some　regular　work　on　one　of　her　committees。'

Then　suddenly　she　conceived　a　thought　which　made　her　blood　run　positively　cold。　　What　if　it　were　a　matter　of　heredity？　　What　if　Thyme　had　inherited　her　grandfather's　single…mindedness？　　Martin　was　giving　proof　of　it。　　Things；　she　knew；　often　skipped　a　generation　and　then　set　in　again。　　Surely；　surely；　it　could　not　have　done　that！　With　longing；　yet　with　dread；　she　waited　for　the　sound　of　Stephen's　latchkey。　　It　came　at　its　appointed　time。

Even　in　her　agitation　Cecilia　did　not　forget　to　spare　him；　all　she　could。　　She　began　by　giving　him　a　kiss；　and　then　said　casually：　〃Thyme　has　got　a　whim　into　her　head。〃

〃What　whim？〃

〃It's　rather　what　you　might　expect；〃　faltered　Cecilia；　〃from　her　going　about　so　much　with　Martin。〃

Stephen's　face　assumed　at　once　an　air　of　dry　derision；　there　was　no　love　lost　between　him　and　his　young　nephew…in…law。

〃The　Sanitist？〃　　he　said；　〃ah！　Well？〃

〃She　has　gone　off　to　do　work…some　place　in　the　Euston　Road。　　I've　had　a　telegram。　　Oh；　and　I　found　this；　Stephen。〃

She　held　out　to　him　half…heartedly　the　two　bits　of　paper；　one　pinkish…brown；　the　other　blue。　　Stephen　saw　that　she　was　trembling。　He　took　them　from　her；　read　them；　and　looked　at　her