a face illumined-第57章

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At　times　her　flame…like　spirit　would　flash　up　with　a　glow　and

brilliancy　that　lighted　and　warmed　his　very　soul；　but　the　feeling

began　to　grow　upon　him　that　this　genial　fire　consumed　the　costliest

of　all　offeringsself。　　Did　not　her　own　broken　heart　and　shattered

hopes　supply　the　fuel？　　Instead　of　brooding　apart　over　some　misfortune

that　would　have　crushed　most　natures；　was　she　not　seeking　to　make

her　life　an　altar　on　which　she　laid　as　a　gift　to　others　the　best

treasures　of　her　woman's　soul？



The　more　closely　he　studied　her　character；　and　the　controlling

impulses　of　her　life；　the　more　sincere　became　his　admiration；

and　the　deeper　his　reverence。　　He　felt　with　truth　that　she　WAS　of

different　and　finer　clay　from　himself。



So　strong　was　this　impression；　that　the　thought　occurred　to　him　that

in　this　and　kindred　reasons　might　be　found　the　explanation　of　the

peculiar　regard　he　felt　for　her。　　He　had　virtually　offered　himself；

and　would　again　if　he　could　find　the　opportunity。　　If　he　were　sure

the　he　would　win　her；　he　would　exult　as　one　might　who　had　secured

the　revenue　of　a　kingdom；　the　purest　and　largest　gem　in　the　world；　or

some　other　possession　that　was　unique　and　priceless。　　The　whole　of

his　strong　intellectual　nature　would　be　jubilant　over　the　great

success　of　his　life。　　He　was　also　conscious　that　some　of　the

deepest　feelings　of　his　soul　were　interested。　　She　was　becoming

like　a　religion　to　him；　and　he　imagined　that　his　regard　for　her

was　somewhat　akin　to　that　of　a　devout　Catholic　for　a　patron　saint。



And　yet　he　was　compelled　to　admit　to　himself　that　he　did　not

lover　her　as　he　supposed　he　would　love　the　woman　he　hoped　to　make

his　wife。　　Why　was　his　heart　so　tranquil　and　his　pulse　so　steady？

Certainly　not　because　of　assured　success。　　Why　did　his　regard　differ

so　radically　from　Stanton's　consuming　passion？　　Should　Stanton

win　her　he　felt　that　he　could　still　seek　her　society　and　enjoy　her

friendship。　　The　prospect　of　never　winning　her　himself　did　not　rob

life　of　its　zest　and　color。　　On　the　contrary；　he　believed　that　she

would　ever　be　an　inspiration；　an　exquisite　ideal　realized　in　actual

life。　　As　such　he　could　not　lose　her　any　more　than　those　women　whom

poetry；　fiction；　and　history　had　placed　as　stars　in　his　firmament；

and　this　belief　so　contented　him　as　to　awaken　surprise。



As　he　returned　from　a　long　and　solitary　stroll　on　Monday　evening

he　soliloquized　complacently；　〃I　am　making　too　great　a　mystery　of

it　all。　　She　is　not　an　ordinary　woman。　　Why　should　I　feel　towards

her　the　ordinary　and　conventional　love　which　any　woman　might　evoke？

There　is　more　of　spirit　than　of　flesh　and　blood　in　her　exquisite

organization。　　Sorrow　has　refined　away　every　gross　and　selfish

element；　and　left　a　saint　towards　whom　devotion　is　far　more　seemly

and　natural　than　passion。　　She　awakens　in　me　a　regard　corresponding

to　her　own　nature；　and　I　thank　heaven　that　I　am　at　least　finely

enough　organized　to　understand　her　and　so　can　seek　to　win　her　in

accordance　with　the　subtle　laws　of　her　being。　　She　would　shrink

inevitably　from　a　downright；　headlong　passion　like　that　of　Stanton's；

no　matter　how　honest　it　might　be　or　how　good　the　man　expressing

it。　　No　hand；　however　strong；　will　ever　grasp　this　'rara　avis；'

this　good　angel；　rather。　　Her　wings　must　be　pinioned　by　gossamer

threads　of　patient　kindness；　delicate　sympathy；　nice　appreciation；

and　all　woven　and　wound　so　unobtrusively　that　the　shy　spirit　may

not　be　startled。　　What　a　fool　I　was　to　blurt　out　my　feelings　last

evening！　　What　rare　good　fortune　is　mine　in　the　fact　that　she

gives　me　the　vantage…ground　of　friendship　from　which　to　urge　a　suit

wherein　must　be　combined　sincerity　with　consummate　skill。　　I　fear

I　must　efface　some　other　image　before　I　can　implant　my　own。　　How

fortunate　I　am　that　my　cool　and　well…poised　nature　will　enable　me

to　work　under　the　guidance　of　judgment　rather　than　impulse。〃



Feeling　that　he　had　much　to　gain　and　was　in　danger　of　irretrievable

loss；　he　lightly　mounted　the　steps　of　the　hotel；　bent　on　finding

at　once　the　object　of　his　thoughts。



He　saw　her　leaving　a　group　in　the　parlor；　of　which　Stanton　was　one；

and　he　hastened　to　intercept　her　in　the　hall…way。　　Just　as　he　was

about　to　speak　to　her；　Mr。　Burleigh　came　bustling　up　and　said：



〃Miss　Burton；　a　strangernot　to　fame　or　fortune；　nor　to　you

probably；　but　a　stranger　to　meis　inquiring　for　youa　stranger

from　the　South。　　He　would　not　give　his　name；　andgood　heaven；　Miss

Burton！　are　you　ill？〃



Van　Berg　led　her　into　a　private　parlor　near。　　She　certainly　had

grown　very　white　and　faint。　　But　after　a　moment　there　came　a　flash

of　hope　and　eager　expectation　into　her　face　that　no　words　could

have　expressed。



〃His　namehis　name？〃　she　gasped。



Mr。　Burleigh　looked　at　her　a　second；　and　then　said：　　〃Stay　quietly

here；　I'll　bring　him　to　you；　and　then；　Mr。　Van　Berg；　perhaps　you

and　I　might　form　an　enormous　crowd。〃



〃Had　I　not　better　leave　you　at　once？〃　the　artist　asked　when　they

were　alone。



〃Wait　a　moment。　　IIam　very　weak。　　It　cannot　bebut　hope　dies

hard。〃



Trembling　like　a　leaf；　and　with　eyes　aflame　with　intense；　eager

hope；　she　watched　the　door。



A　moment　later　Mr。　Burleigh　ushered　in　a　middle…aged　gentleman；

who　commenced　saying：



〃Pardon　me；　Miss　Burton；　for　not　sending　my　name；　but　you　would

not　have　known　it〃then　the　young　lady's　appearance　checked　him。



The　effect　of　his　coming　was　indeed　striking。　　It　was　as　if　a　gust

of　wind　had　suddenly　extinguished　a　lamp。　　The　luminous　eyes　closed

for　a　moment；　and　the　face　became　so　pallid　and　ashen　in　its　hue　as

to　suggest　death。　　It　was　evident　to　Van　Berg　that　her　disappointment

was　more　bitter　than　death。



〃Miss　Burton　took　a　long　walk　this　afternoon；〃　he　said；　hastily；

〃and；　I　fear；　went　much　beyond　her　strength。　　Perhaps　she　had　better

see　you　to…morrow。〃



〃Oh；　certainly；　certainly；　I　will　remain；　if　there　is　need；〃　the

gentleman　began。



By　a　strong　and　evident　effort　Miss　Burton　regained　self…control；

and　said；　with　a　faint　smile　that　played　over　her　face　a　moment

like　a　gleam　of　wintry　sunshine：



〃You　strong　men　often　call　women　weak；　and　we；　too　often；　prove　you

right。　　As　Mr。　Van　Berg　suggests；　I　am　a　little　overtaxed　to…night。

Perhaps　I　had　better　see　you　in　the　morning。〃



〃I　am　a　transient　guest；　and　ought　to　be　on　my　way　with　the　first

train；〃　said　the　gentleman。　　〃My　errand　is　as　brief　as　it　is

grateful　to　me。　　Do　not　leave；　sir；〃　he　said　to　Van　Berg。　　〃If　you

are　a　friend　of　Miss　Burton　it　will　be　pleasant　for　you　to　hear

what　I　have　to　say；　and；　I　warrant　you　that　she　will　never　tell

you　nor　anyone　else　herself。〃



〃May　I　stay？〃　he　asked。



She　felt　so　weak　and　unnerved；　so　in　need　of　a　sustaining　hand　and

mind　that　she　looked　at　him　appealingly；　and　said：



〃Yes。　　This　gentleman　cannot　disgrace　me　more　than　I　have　myself

this　evening。〃



〃Disgrace　you！　Miss　Burton；〃　exclaimed　the　gentleman。　　〃Your　name

is　a　household　word　in　our　home；　and　our　honor　for　it　is　only

excelled　by　our　love。　　You　remember　my　invalid　daughter；　Emily

Musgraveour　only　and　unfortunate　child。　　She　attended　the　college

in　which　you　are　an　instructress。　　Before　she　came　under　your

influence　her　infirmities　were　crushing　her　spirit　and　embittering

her　life。　　So　morbid　was　she　becoming　that　she　apparently　began　to

hate　her　mother　and　myself　as　the　authors　of　her　wretched　existence。

But　by　some　divine　magic　you　sweetened　the　bitter　waters　of　her

life；　and　now　she　is　a　fountain　of　joy　in　our　home。　　In　her　behalf

and　her　mother's；　I　thank　you；　and　even　more；　if　possible；　in　my　own

behalf；　for　the　reproachful；　averted　face　of　my　child　was　killing

me；〃　and　tears　stood　in　the　strong　man's　eyes。



There　was　nothing　conventional　in　the　way　in　which　Jeannie　Burton

received　his　warm　gratitude。　　She　leaned　wearily　back　in　her　chair；

and　for　a　moment　closed　her　eyes。　　There　was　far　more　resignat